Author's Note: I'm not sure where I was going to go with this story. Let me know what suggestions you have … like where you'd like to see Liv and El end up. Or like anything that would stop them being together or struggles that might bring them together or not. I have an idea but I didn't really plan this story so I put it to you, my faithful readers:
This is your chance to help me shape this story, to manipulate the characters and their storylines and help me to create a situation, so that we can see what could happen that could change the fabric of space and time between two characters.
PLEASE REVIEW! REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW and let me know your thoughts.
XOXOXO
Elliot couldn't do it. He spent all night awake. Lying and staring at the ceiling all night and he had been thinking. He was thinking about Olivia as per usual.
He was thinking about going to see Dr Huang. He thought about asking if this attraction he felt was normal. If partners on the job typically got this close, or if it was something he should hide. He needed some help to figure out what was going on. He needed fresh eyes to look at what he was looking at.
He also thought about what he needed. He needed love. He needed someone to love and someone who could love him. Truly and dearly. Love him for everything he was mentally, physically and emotionally.
He deserved someone who understood him. Who understood his life and what that came with. Someone who knew that the job wasn't just something he could shut off when he left the station. That the job was part of him and it made him the way he was.
He needed someone who understood that he was strong and tough, but there were times when needed someone to lean on. Someone to be strong for a short time while he was weak momentarily. Kathy was never that person for him. She never understood the pressures he was under. He never let her see that he could be broken.
He found out when they divorced that his life wasn't much different without her. He just missed the children. He didn't know Kathy, what she did, who her friends were, how she looked even. And if he was honest with himself, he didn't miss her at all and hadn't in years (even when they loved together).
XOXOXO
As he got dressed he had to think about Olivia and what she would need. They both had the same job, they both did the same things, they both liked the same things (most of the time). He started to think of questions he had never really thought before.
Did she have feelings for him?
What would she expect from him?
Would she want to start a relationship with him?
Was he the kind of man that she could see herself with?
Could they have a relationship even with all his baggage?
He started to think about how he would act in the office today. He thought about watching Olivia, and not just in the normal way that he did. Not watching her movements to see how graceful she was, or how beautiful she was. He was going to watch her to see if she showed any signs that she might reciprocate his feelings. He wasn't going to let his feelings get in the way of his observations of her.
He decided that he would go and see Huang on his lunch break (and swear him to secrecy). Seek out some specialist help, assess what his options are.
XOXOXO
Olivia walked into the squad room and then she stopped in her tracks. Elliot wasn't there. His papers were stacked in the correct folders, all in their little boxes. It was just like he had left it last night.
Her heart-rate elevated as she looked around the room for Elliot.
Noticing that she had been standing in the one spot for a few minutes she quickly walked over to her desk and sat down. Starting to look through some files that had been put on her desk she wasn't really paying attention to the content.
Her stomach started to churn as she thought about all the things that could have happened to him.
Car crash - He did drive her home but had he made it home safely?
Robbed - Nope … he would have caught the bastard.
Fire in his building - Would he have made it out? Would he be helping other people in the building?
Shot on his way to work - It was possible, he would step in to help civilians. Not to be the hero but because that was just who Elliot Stabler was.
No! She couldn't think like this. She had no right to think these thoughts. She has no right to be worried about Elliot like this. They are working partners, not life partners or dating. Nothing like that.
She just put her head down and attempted to pay attention to the mountain of paperwork she had to do.
XOXOXO
Elliot was late. He had a micro sleep in the shower and as a result was now running late.
Traffic getting in had been terrible because he had left later then he meant to.
"Fuck!" he thought as he arrived at the precinct to find that all the good parks were taken and all he could get was something nearly a block away from the station.
Elliot ran from the car to the station door, and deciding that he couldn't wait for the elevator he then ran up the stairs.
As he burst into the squad room he found that everyone was silently working at their desks on the paper work from the case that they had just closed.
Cragen walked out of his office and waved Elliot over.
"You got an explanation as to why you are late?" he said quietly.
Elliot caught his breath before saying "None that would make sense Captain."
"Next time while you are stuck in traffic, think of a better excuse" the Captain said before letting Elliot go to his desk to do the paperwork he was required to fill in.
XOXOXO
When lunch time rolled around Olivia offered to get him something from the bakery across the street which he declined. He didn't typically decline her offers, she normally knew exactly what he would want even before he knew it himself. She was that good at reading him.
Olivia was initially taken back by Elliot's rejection however she didn't let him see it. She just smiled, nodded and headed out of the squad room.
As she walked out the door she looked back at Elliot, hunched over his desk doing his written work. She watched the way his back muscles tensed almost as if he knew she was watching him. She turned and left thinking about how strange he had been acting. He hadn't said much, hadn't explained his late arrival, and hadn't offered her coffee when he had gotten some for himself. He just didn't seem like her normal Elliot.
XOXOXO
Elliot waited for about 5 minutes after Olivia left before he got up from his desk and made his way out the back exit of the station. He knew Olivia was headed to the bakery across the road but he didn't want her to see him leaving. He already left like he had hurt her feelings by rejecting her offer for lunch.
But he just couldn't let her know what he was doing. He had to see Huang before she found out.
Considering the FBI building that George's office was only a few blocks away Elliot decided that he wanted to walk. The walk would do him some good. Fresh air running through his lungs often helped him gather his thoughts.
XOXOXO
Authors Note: I decided to leave Elliot's visit until the next chapter. I was tired, restless and I felt like the story is taking a bit more shape now it has a slight hint of a direction. However, I still need your help. So please REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW and let me know how you want to see this play out? How do you see Liv and El getting together? Let me know ;) xx