Author's Note: I went into this telling myself I was going to write a one-shot, but then it just completely exploded with views. I also got several PMs from people telling me I should continue it. Well… I've always been one to give into peer pressure, so I'm going to make it a little longer. I knew where I would go with it if it were a full-length story, anyway. It's not going to be terribly long, but expect four or five chapters.
Chapter Two
Elena stared up at the ceiling, her heart racing. Guilt gnawed at her stomach. Poor Stefan. How could she have done this to him? Sure, he had lied about some shady alliance with Klaus, but she had slept with his brother. Her betrayal was clearly worse. And Damon… that bastard. He had left as quickly as he had come. She knew Damon could be selfish sometimes, but this was ridiculous. For someone who claimed he loved her above all else, he sure was quick to throw her away like an old sock.
Sleep evaded her for the remainder of the night. At daybreak, Elena climbed out of bed and walked to the bathroom. She needed to wash him away. To get him off of her body and mind. Turning the water up high enough to scald any human, she stepped in and let the water flow over her. She soaped up her loofah and scrubbed him away.
But she couldn't stop thinking about him. The minty scent of his shampoo. The way his breath wisped her neck. His hard, firm kisses. The moment of ecstasy when he finally entered her.
Get a grip, Elena. She turned off the water and grabbed her towel. You're supposed to be with Stefan. You love Stefan. Stefan wouldn't leave you confused and heartbroken and alone.
Pain that burrowed in her heart. She had to confess. After throwing on a pair of jeans and a sweater, Elena combed her hair and crept downstairs. Oh, no. Jeremy. What if he had heard them? What would he think?
She couldn't worry about that. Stefan was the priority right now. She had to tell him before Damon let it slip.
When Elena arrived at the boarding house, she took a deep breath and knocked three times.
"Elena?" Damon asked as he opened the door. "Since when do you knock?"
She shoved past him, refusing to meet his eyes. "I need to talk to Stefan."
"Whoa, what the hell? If this is about telling you to kill that hunter-"
"You know what this is about, Damon," Elena said. "Where's Stefan? He needs to know."
"What, exactly, do I need to know?" Stefan appeared in the doorway.
Damon laughed. "Yeah, I'm not getting in the middle of your little lovers' spat. I'm gonna go-"
"No, you're not," Elena ordered. "You're staying right here."
"Look, it's physically painful to hear you two go back and forth. And it's really none of my business, anyway."
"How can you say that after what happened?" Elena said, anger surging through her veins. She had to let it out.
"After what happened?" Stefan repeated. "What's going on?"
Elena took a deep breath. "I slept with Damon."
"You… what?" Stefan stepped backward. "How-"
"I'm sorry, Stefan," tears welled in her eyes. "I'm so sorry. I never thought I'd be the kind of person who'd be able to do something like this. I guess that's the problem. It's just… not working. We both know it. It hasn't worked since I turned. I'm not the same person anymore. I hate it, but I'm tired of fighting it. I'm so tired of trying to be human!"
Ignoring Elena's plight, Stefan lunged at his brother, shoving him against the wall. He grasped Damon's neck with his hand. Damon tried to break free from the hold, but Stefan's rage overpowered his usual advantage.
"Let him go!" Elena struggled to break them apart.
"How long has this been going on?" Stefan demanded, his voice eerily flat.
"Stefan, I… never… slept with her!" Damon gasped through the chokehold.
"Don't lie to me," he tightened his grip.
"I'm… not… lying!"
"Elena, how long has this been going on?" Stefan refused to take his eyes off of his brother.
"Just put him down and I'll explain!" Elena pleaded.
Stefan hesitated, looked at her, and released Damon's neck. He slumped to the ground.
"It happened last night. It was the only time; I promise," she refused to meet Stefan's eyes.
"Wait, what?" Stefan asked.
"I'll second that," Damon rubbed his neck. "What?"
"I called Damon because I was having these weird hallucination problems with my transition. He came over to help, and… well…"
"What hallucinations? Elena, I didn't leave the house at all last night."
"No," Elena shook her head. "You must've gone out for at least a little while."
"A little while? Please," Damon scoffed. "That definitely wasn't me."
"What do you mean, hallucinations?" Stefan pressed.
Elena closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "When I walked into my bathroom last night, it was covered in blood. I freaked out and fell down, and when I looked around again, it was gone. That's when I called Damon."
"You never called me," Damon said. "Check your phone."
Elena scrolled through the feed. Stefan: Saturday at 9:52 AM. The last call she had made.
"How…" she shook her head in disbelief. "No."
She looked at Stefan. He was paler than usual, studying her with both concern and indignation. Damon leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his chest. Elena expected him to crack an ill-timed joke, but he seemed more worried than anything else.
"Look, I'm gonna make a couple calls and try to figure this out," said Stefan. "Damon, why don't you get Elena a drink? She obviously doesn't want anything to do with me."
"Stefan, I-"
"Just let it go for now," Damon said as he led Elena into the kitchen. "What do you want?"
Mortified, she refused to meet his eyes. "It doesn't matter. Um, something strong. And not bourbon."
"People these days have no taste for the finer things in life. Ric would've taken bourbon," Damon rolled his eyes and reached in the cupboard for an old bottle of tequila. He poured her a shot and slid it across the table.
She downed it in an instant and took the bottle from Damon. "I'm gonna need more than that."
"Yeah, I'll bet," said Damon. "Don't worry; we'll figure this out. Stefan's got connections."
"And by connections, you mean he's working with Klaus."
"Look… sometimes you have to make deals with the devil to get what you need."
"What could he possibly need? He crossed a line and you know it," Elena shot back more tequila.
"That explains a lot," Damon smirked. "I have to ask. Do you really think I'd run out on you?"
Elena put her head in her hands. "Look, it was just a hallucination."
"Hallucination or not, you really let it out just now."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean you're right. You're not human. There's no use trying to normalize. The world is yours now. Be what you want to be, not what you used to think you should be."
"But when I was human, Stefan-"
"Keyword: was."
A knock came to the door.
"Oh, joy. I'll bet that's our favorite, psychopathic hybrid here to save the day," Damon said, leading Elena back into the living room.
"You should watch what you say around me, Damon," Klaus said. "Ah, hello, Elena. Congratulations on killing yourself one of the most powerful hunters in the world. I hope you're enjoying the consequences."
"Of course you know what's going on," Elena said sarcastically. "Just tell me how to make it stop."
Klaus laughed. "You can't make it stop. None of us can. You need magic. Pity your witch is out of commission. Have fun spiraling into madness."
"Did you come here to gloat, or do you have something useful to say?" asked Stefan. "Having an insane vampire on the loose is the last thing we need right now."
An insane vampire? Is that really what Stefan thought of her? Certainly he was angry for her confession, even though half of it had been a hallucination. But to actually call her insane? That was a little out of line.
"You've obviously dealt with this before," said Damon. "Since you won't hook us up with a witch, what else can we do?"
"I've killed several hunters in my time, but my experience won't help you much," said Klaus. "It's different for everyone. The curse delves into your brain. It brings out your worst fears and your greatest desires."
"It must've been terrible for you, thinking Coldplay broke up," Damon said.
Klaus glared back at him. "Your pathetic attempts at humor are so tiresome. It's no wonder Stefan can't stand you."
Elena clenched her fists together, hardly noticing as her fingernails drew blood. "If you can't help us, why even bother coming over here?"
"I did help you," Klaus opened the door to leave. "You need a witch. Now find a witch. It shouldn't be terribly difficult. Best of luck to you."
Elena slumped onto the couch.
"Greatest desires, huh?" said Stefan.
"Will you let that go?" Elena growled. "It didn't happen!"
"That's not the point!" exclaimed Stefan. "You thought it did! For all you knew, it was real!"
"I can't listen to this," Elena stormed toward the door. "I don't have to listen to this."
She ran out of the house and headed down the driveway. After her second major accident, she hated cars as a general rule. With her newfound vampire speed, they were unnecessary for short distances, anyway.
Elena slowed down when she reached town. She contemplated visiting the Grill to see if Matt or Jeremy were stuck with the opening shift, but decided against it. Bringing them into her "insane vampire" drama would be beyond selfish, especially since they'd both been held hostage by a crazed hunter only a day before. Finally she settled on a walk around the park to clear her head.
Her heart dropped as she watched a young couple push a stroller with a newborn baby, remembering she would never be able to have a child of her own. Life fled from her presence, but death nipped at her heels wherever she went.
Closing her eyes, Elena leaned against an old maple tree, passively wondering if her presence would cause it to wither.
"Elena, are you okay?"
She snapped open her eyes. Matt smiled and held out his wrist. Blood dripped down his arm and pooled onto the ground.
"I thought you might want some more," he said. "Remember how you almost killed me last time? It's okay. It's your nature. It's what you're supposed to do."
"No. You're not real," Elena turned and walked away from him.
Going into town on her own had been a mistake. Why hadn't she listened to Stefan? Elena picked up her pace. There were people everywhere. Blood everywhere. They all had puncture marks in their necks, their wrists. Blood flowed from their veins and drenched their shirts. There was so much of it everywhere. It smelled amazing. She locked eyes with a middle-aged man who bled so heavily from the neck that it gushed out, spraying like a fountain. She closed her eyes and tried to ignore the tantalizing scent, but she couldn't fight her instincts.
Elena's face flushed. Her fangs came out.
This isn't real. Control yourself. Control yourself.
Her eyes met those of a pretty, brunette girl. Elena watched as blood trickled down her neck. Overcome with hunger, Elena lunged forward. She pulled her behind a building and sank her fangs deep into the girl's neck. When brunette screamed, Elena covered her mouth.
"Shut up."
She drank deeply, completely unencumbered, reveling in the sweet, warm taste the nameless girl's blood. She wasn't a person, but a tool. Something to be enjoyed and savored, but certainly not pitied.
"Elena, stop!"
A strong arm thrust her away from the girl and knocked her to the ground. She shook her head, regaining her balance as Damon bit into his own wrist and fed the victim his blood.
"Go home and forget this ever happened," he said.
The girl scampered away as quickly as her weakened body would let her.
"What are you doing?" Damon asked. "Feeding in broad daylight? Anybody could've seen you!"
She could feel her fangs retract. Oh, God. What had she done? That poor girl. Elena wiped the blood from her mouth, fighting back tears.
"I… I don't know what happened," she stuttered. "First, everything was okay. And then Matt was here, and then there was blood everywhere! I lost control! I almost… Oh, God… Damon, what's happening to me?"
"Hey," he said soothingly, moving close to her. "It's okay. We'll figure it out."
Damon wiped a tear from Elena's cheek and ran his fingers through her hair. She lay her head on his chest, gripping his shirt with her shaking hands. Wrapping his arm around her waist, he hugged her tight.
"I don't wanna kill anybody else," she sobbed.
"I know you don't," he whispered. "But remember, I'm here for you, whether you do or not. I'll help you through this no matter what it takes, Elena."
She calmed herself with his slow, steady breaths. It felt so familiar, just like the night before.
But that had never happened. Their encounter existed only in her mind. It meant everything to her, but nothing to him. How could Elena know that the Damon who stood before her now was real? What if he was nothing more than the continuing torture that this curse subjected her to?
She pulled away from his embrace.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"I don't… I can't…"
She turned away from him and ran as fast as her legs could carry her. She needed something tangible. Something that made her feel real, no matter what pain it had caused her in the past.
Elena didn't stop until she reached Wickery Bridge, panting and grief-stricken. She leaned over the rails and stared down into the depths that had killed her parents. The same depths that managed to kill her a year later. Whenever Elena thought of tragedy, she thought of Wickery Bridge.
"Elena, what are you doing?" Damon called as he caught up with her.
"Stay away!" she yelled.
"What's going on?"
"How do I even know you're real?"
Damon rushed up to her and grabbed her wrist. Elena tried to pull away, but his strength outmatched hers.
"Because I'm still here, and I'm not going anywhere."
She pulled out of his hold. "I can't know that."
Damon sighed, folding his arms over the railing and looking down at the water. "Why would you come here, of all places?"
Elena shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe because it's the last place I saw my parents alive. It's the last place I was human. When I was human, I knew where my life was going, more or less. I wanted to get married, have kids, and, I dunno, die in my sleep in old age. Now that can never happen. I'm just some crazy, bloodthirsty vampire who's in danger of coming unhinged at any second."
"Elena, I-"
"Maybe I should just put an end to it; you know?" she fiddled with her ring. "What's my life compared to the countless people I'll slaughter?"
"No," Damon pulled her hand away from the ring and entwined his fingers in hers. "I'll help you get through this. Look, maybe you can never have the normal life you wanted, but that doesn't mean it has to end. I'll be here to help you adjust, no matter how long it takes."
Elena moved back, but held his hand tight. "How do I even know you're real?"
Damon put his hand on her cheek. "Because I'm here now. Feel this. This is real. I'm real. I'm not going to leave you."
When he leaned in close, Elena could smell his minty shampoo. His breath felt warm on her neck. When she leaned up, her lips were met with soft, soothing kisses. Damon pulled her close and hugged her tight. In that moment, she forgot about blood. Her hallucinations faded into the back of her mind. The countless tragedies floated away like a distant dream.
And she knew he was real.
Gyahh... That last bit was so fun to write. Also, I swear that TVD fanfics are the only thing that keep me sane while I wait for Thursday. Season 4 is so good! Anyway, thanks for reading!