A/N: Once again, totally written for fun xD
Chapter 2: Murderer 1, Detective 0
"Okay… Let the game begin!"
Tristan and Serenity sat back on the couch and watched as Melvin sat down in the chair he made Yami place in the middle of the room.
"Oh ma-aid," Melvin said, smirking at Bakura. "Come give me a hug!"
"I will not go near you!" Bakura said.
"Um, Melvin, I'm meant to be your wife you know…" Ryou spoke up.
"Oh. In that case, would you like a hug Ryou?" Melvin asked.
"N-no thank you! But could I get a chair so I don't have to sit on the floor?" Ryou replied.
"Only I get the chair, got it?" Melvin said.
"U-understood!" Ryou squeaked.
"Now maid. Where's my hug?" Melvin said, turning back to Bakura.
"I'm not bloody hugging you!" Bakura shouted.
There was a loud knock on the wall. "Can we come in yet? Joey is irritating me!" Seto said.
"Nyeh, you're the irritating one!" Joey replied.
"Alright, alright. Butler, go and answer the door." Melvin ordered, waving his hand.
Yami muttered Egyptian curse words under his breath as he went to the other room and pretended to open the front door. "Welcome to the Ishtar mansion." Yami mumbled, thinking that he might as well try to be in character for the purposes of the game. "Finally. We were waiting in the rain for 5 whole minutes." Seto said, walking in the room. "Don't be hard on the nice man!" Joey spoke up, following Seto. Seto smirked before talking. "Why? Do you want to sleep with him like you slept with our butler?"
"WHAT!?" Joey exclaimed.
"Oh, good one Seto! You're really getting into the game!" Tristan said.
"Joey, you shouldn't cheat on your husband." Serenity giggled.
Seto had a smug look on his face while Joey felt himself go red. Ryou lifted himself off the floor. "Welcome!" He said happily, shaking Seto and Joey's hand. He glanced back to Melvin. "Aren't you going to greet them too?" Ryou asked. Melvin stood and opened his arms. "Ur, no thank you." Seto said, looking around for a chair. "Can your butler fetch me something to sit on?" He said.
"Only I get the chair!" Melvin said again.
"Alright, alright. Jeez." Joey said, planting himself on the ground. Seto made a face and refused to sit, so Joey yanked on his arm until he fell to the floor with an 'ooft!'
"You're going to pay for that mutt." He threatened.
"Nyeh, can someone get this guy the poison drink already?" Joey asked.
"Butler! Go and tell the cook to bring in a poisoned drink!" Melvin shouted. He was really enjoying his role as Lord of the house.
"Okay, okay." Yami said, leaving the room to get to the kitchen.
"You're not meant to know it's poisoned!" Tristan said.
"Can we come in now?" Marik whined.
"Dude, our turn will come, just wait a little longer." Duke said.
"Hey Yami! Is it time to give Seto the poisoned drink?" Yugi asked happily. "Yes, although I really wish it was Melvin we were poisoning." Yami sighed, watching Yugi fill four cups of water and place them on a saucer. "Now Yami, do you know how to hold this?" Yugi asked. The look Yami gave him answered his question. "Here, let me help you." Tea said, putting down her watering can. She lifted the saucer up and placed it in Yami's hands. "No sudden movements. Walk straight and look ahead of you. Set it down slowly so that you don't drop anything." She instructed.
"Why did I have to be the butter? I'm much suited for the role of Lord of the house." Yami muttered. "It's just a fun game Yami!" Yugi convinced him. Tea nodded. "Yeah. And don't forget, you could have it worse. I'm already expecting Melvin to molest his maid." She said. Yami chuckled. "It's already started." He said, turning around and walking out of the kitchen.
Thankfully Yami didn't drop the saucer and he placed it in the middle of the small table in front of Melvin. Seto quickly reached for the closest cup. "You're eager to die." Melvin said in amusement. "Please. I'm doing this quickly so I can get back to work." He sipped the water. "The water tastes funny." He said, getting back into character.
Then he placed the cup on the table and pretended to choke. "Ah. My throat. It hurts." He said with no emotion. "Seto!" Joey cried, feigning worry. "Oh dear! What's going on?" Ryou asked. Then Seto paused. "I'm not falling over." He told everyone. "Aw come on Kaiba! Just for the game!" Tristan said. "Yes, don't ruin it now." Serenity spoke up. Seto groaned and lay on his side. "This is the best you're going to get." He said. "Good enough!" Tristan said happily. Then Seto closed his eyes.
"He's dead!" Yami yelled. Tea and Yugi rushed in. "Oh no!" Tea exclaimed. "Nyeh!" Joey said, sniffling. "Who would do such a thing? … Actually, I bet there are a lotta people who want to kill Kaiba. Ow!" Joey was hit on the head by Kaiba and Serenity reminded her brother that he was in mourning. "We should call a detective." Yugi said, heading for the phone. "Yes, please do." Ryou said.
At that moment the door of the room burst open. "Greetings! It is I, Marik Ishtar, the detective!" Marik shouted, his arms raised in the air. "And I am Duke Devlin, the sexy sidekick." Duke said.
"Wait! I want to be the sexy one!" Marik said.
"No way. That position has been filled by Duke Devlin." Duke said, pointing to himself.
"It's okay Marik. You can be the stupid detective." Bakura said with a cheeky smile.
"No! I'm not the friggin' stupid detective!" Marik argued.
"Marik, why don't you be the master detective? Isn't that better than sexy?" Ryou asked, trying to cheer Marik up.
Marik pondered for a moment and then cracked a large smile. "Yes! I shall be the master detective!" He said happily. "Now, what seems to be the problem?"
"My husband is dead!" Joey said, pointing to Kaiba.
"This looks like a job for Marik Ishtar, master detective!" Marik said, walking over to Kaiba. "He must've been poisoned." Duke said, looking over the two.
Marik nodded. "Alright. We're going to investigate this. And my reward will be the Millennium Puzzle!" He said with a laugh.
"You're not touching my puzzle!" Yami said angrily.
"Then I shall take the ring!"
"You will do no such bloody thing!" Bakura shouted.
"Fluffy, I order you to give him your ring as a reward!" Melvin said happily.
"You're not the boss of me!" Bakura retorted.
"I am the King of the World! I am the boss of everyone!" Melvin cackled.
"Uh, Melvin, you're only the Lord of the house…" Ryou said quietly.
"Silence! I am the star of this game!" Marik said, standing up.
"Um, dude?" Duke asked.
"Yes! I am the star but Duke is the sexy star!" Marik corrected.
"Much better." Duke said with a satisfied smile.
"Can I stop playing dead now? My company needs me." Seto said, sitting up.
"Yeah Kaiba, you can get back to work." Tristan said.
"Thanks for playing." Serenity told him with a smile.
So Seto stood up and headed for his laptop while the others stood around waiting for Marik to make a decision. "Okay! Duke and I shall look for clues! Melvin, I shall need your subordinates to help me search!" Marik said. "Fine, so long as Fluffy and Yami stay with me, for they are my personal slaves." Melvin told him.
"I'm a bloody maid, not a slave!" Bakura argued.
"And I am the Pharaoh of Egypt!" Yami added.
"Silence slaves!"
"We're not slaves!"
"Um, guys, don't forget time is ticking. You don't want someone else to die right?" Serenity spoke up.
"That's right! Come, Duke! We shall investigate!" Marik said, rushing out of the room with Duke and the others by his heals. Yami snuck out with them while Bakura was left in the room with Marik (and Serenity, who was watching over them while Tristan left with the group).
"I have a terrible feeling that my husband is going to cheat on me with the maid." Ryou said with a sigh. "Don't worry Ryou! Having a husband is overrated anyway. Look at me? With Seto out of the game I'm free!" Joey said. "Be careful Joey! Don't do anything that will attract the murderer's attention." Yugi said to his friend. "Yeah, we still don't know who poisoned Seto's drink. It could've been anyone." Yami said, beginning to enjoy himself now that he was away from Melvin.
"Alright! Everyone, search for a clue in this room!" Marik ordered. "And report anything suspicious to me or Duke." The teens searched the room, looking high and low for one of the clues Serenity placed (Duke was having a great time checking out Tea's ass while she bent over to look underneath a table). Yugi looked under the couches and Yami held Ryou on his shoulders to see if there was anything on top of the closet (which nearly suffocated Yami, as Ryou was wearing a dress that fell over Yami's face).
They searched for a good five minutes before Marik got bored. "Hasn't anyone found anything?" He whined. "Marik, you're the detective! Why don't you look around?" Joey complained. "Guys, five minutes before someone else dies. The murder should have their mind made up by now as to who they want to kill." Tristan informed. "No! I'm too young to die!" Marik said, collapsing to the floor. "Uh, Marik, the murderer can't kill us. Otherwise it would be too easy to win." Duke said, crossing his arms. Marik regained his composure and stood with his hands on his hips. "Hah! I knew it! I was just testing you my trusty sidekick!" He said. "How about we split up?" Yugi said. "That way we might be able to cover more ground." Yami nodded. "Good idea Yugi. Let's split up." He said.
Marik and Duke stayed together while everyone else went on their separate ways. Tristan watched the time on his phone and set off the loud ringtone. "Alright guys, someone's dead!" He called. Soon after, a scream was heard. "Frig! Someone died!" Marik yelled, rushing to the voice with Duke at his side.
In the hallway outside the room, Ryou was lying on the floor. Tea was by his side. "The Lady of the house has been killed!" She exclaimed. "Gardener! Did you see who did it?" Marik asked. Duke had a pad and pen in his hand, ready to write down anything. "No. I just heard the scream and came running." Tea explained.
At that moment, Yami and Yugi arrived, Joey following a little later. "And he was such a hospitable housewife." Joey said, wiping a pretend tear. "At least this way he won't get upset when he finds out Melvin is cheating on him with the maid." Yugi said with a sniff. "What's bothering me is which one of us has to tell Melvin the news." Yami spoke up.
All eyes fell on Marik. "What? Why me?" He asked.
"You're the detective Marik. It's your responsibility that Lady Ryou is dead, so you're the one who needs to tell Melvin." Yami said crossing his arms.
"Frig! Sexy sidekick, back me up!" Marik asked.
"Okay!" Duke said.
"Not physically damn it! Back me up when I go to tell Melvin!"
"Oh, okay."
"Ryou, how about you walk back to the main room? You can get out of your costume and watch the rest of the game with me and Serenity." Tristan suggested.
Ryou nodded and stood up.
"Alright. Sexy sidekick and I will go tell Melvin. The rest of you, continue to look for clues." Marik said. He, Duke, Tristan and Ryou walked back over to the main room, leaving Tea, Yugi, Yami and Joey together.
"Let go of me Melvin!" They heard Bakura shout as they neared the room.
"That's master Melvin to you!" Melvin told him with a laugh.
"For the love of Ra, why did I have to be the maid?" Bakura lamented.
"Would you keep it down? I'm trying to fix my company." Seto told them.
"I wonder who was killed…" Serenity said.
Marik, Duke, Tristan and Ryou entered the room. "Look Melvin, it's your wife. You don't want to be caught cheating do you?" Bakura, who was being hugged by Melvin from behind, said with relief. "Actually, Melvin, I have bad news." Marik said. Duke nodded. "Your wife was totally murdered." Duke said. "Remember me as a good housewife Melvin." Ryou said, sitting next to Serenity.
Melvin laughed. "What an interesting turn of events! Now we don't have to sneak around, Fluffy!" Melvin said, hugging Bakura tighter. "Why the bloody hell did you let yourself get killed Ryou!?" Bakura shouted. "Sorry Bakura. I was in the murders way." Ryou said.
Tristan lifted a hand to his head. "Melvin, do you think you could at least try to mourn for your wife?" He said. Melvin's grip loosened and Bakura managed to hop away. Melvin sat back down in his chair. "Fine. I shall mourn until the next person dies." He said. Bakura rolled his eyes. "Everyone is taking this game way too seriously." He scoffed as he dusted the television. Then he caught himself cleaning and dropped his duster. "Now I'm taking this game too seriously!" He said in shock.
"So, Melvin, no hard feelings that we didn't catch your wife's killer yet?" Marik said. Melvin smiled. "Not at all. But if my maid falls victim next, then I shall make your life a living hell." He told them. "Roger! Let's get outta here Marik." Duke said, pulling on Marik's arm. Ryou pouted. "I wish he cared for me like that when I was still alive." Ryou said with a sniffle.
A/N: I hope you like it so far :3