"It would be so easy," my hallucination said, "to take a knife and just kill him."

"Stop," I hissed, twisting around to look at it. As usual, it disappeared completely from my view. I tried to breathe, but it was so damn cold, my head was spinning and I couldn't focus my gaze at anything.

"How do you think you would feel?"

I took few steps backwards, hitting my back at something. I barely felt the pain.

"Miserable?" My body began to shake, my hands were trembling and God, I really felt like vomiting. "Guilty?' My heart was pounding in my chest. So loud that I nearly didn't hear his next words. "No, artista, you would feel powerful. You would love it."

An image appeared in my head, more real than my own workshop. Riario standing in front of Zita. Riario crouching over her dead body, trembling, shouting, with blood on his hands. Broken.

"Leonardo?!"

I blinked. The sight disappeared and I was back. I was sitting on the floor, with arms around my knees. My back hurt - I must have fallen down at some point. Zo was near, looking straight at me, confusion in his eyes. He was close, so very close, but he wasn't touching me, waiting for my permission. I lowered my gaze.

"Leo, look at me." I was too afraid that he wouldn't seem real. That he wasn't real because, because I couldn't know anymore. "Breathe. Come on, in and out."

I must have forgotten about it.

"Is he okay?" said the boy and fuck, he was approaching us. Who was he? What was he doing here? His hair was so dark and this eyes...

Zo hissed, "Out. I'll find you later... Just go now."

A moment and we were alone. Me and Zo. Few steps apart. He should go too, Earth be damned if anything ever happened to him.

But it wasn't cold anymore. Cold meant danger. Warm? Damn if I knew for sure but I l wanted it. I wanted to be so hot that I would never freeze again. My hand reached for his, fingers brushing his palm. I moved closer, much closer, so close that I was leaning on his lap. He sneaked an arm around my waist and hugged me. Not to tight but enough to make me feel him. He was real. Very real.

I looked over his shoulder. There, at a table just next to his head, a hammer was was in my reach, I wouldn't even have to try.

"Kill."

I moved back, so violently that I bumped into wall again. The pain was nothing compared to the panic.

"Leo?" Zo tried to stop me, but I was already on my feet. He looked even more confused than before. "Leo, wait!"

But I was already running. I dashed out on the street and didn't look back.

I had no idea where I was going. I let my legs carry me where they wanted - and they wanted to be as far from Zo as possible. I focused on my breath, trying to get away from my thoughts. But I couldn't. They were faster than me. They were stuck in my head, mocking and whispering.

It was cold again.

I tripped down and fell straight at my face, probably making a great sight. The pain was there but I was too numb to actually feel it.I got up on my knees, noticing the river just few steps in front of me.

The river. Time was a river, the damn Turk had said so many time. He would suddenly appear and disappear out of the shadows, in places where it wasn't even possible, unnoticed by anyone but me. I had seen Zita, I had talked to Giuliano and I had done it after their death. I had also met my future self, hadn't I? No. No, I hadn't. It was caused by the snake's venom or the potion that Ima had given me. Maybe both. Maybe it hadn't left my bloodstreams yet, maybe I was still hallucinating, maybe it has some side effects.

Maybe I was crazy.

Maybe Riario was real. Dead, cold and seeking for revenge, but real nonetheless.

"Girolamo?" I asked, this time without a hint of doubt. Nothing happened. I counted the seconds, slowly raising to my feet, waiting.

A shade appeared in the corner of my eye. I forced myself to remain motionless as it passed next to me and stood in front of me. It was Riario. It was the man I would recognise everywhere, in any shape he would take. At the same time, it wasn't him, not exactly. He was too pale, too dim. He was wet, his figure streaming with water. I looked up at his face and he wasn't even smirking. His eyes were cold and he was...

"Riario?" I took a step back. Then another. "Is that you?"

He opened his mouth but no sound came out of it, only more water. I felt sick. I didn't want to look down, didn't want to do that, but I had to. I had to look at his wrist. They were covered with sleeves but damn, his hands were red. The sight of blood was not at all strange for me, but my stomach gave up anyway. I turned around and threw up, trembling.

"You showed me how you died," I whispered when I found my voice again. He nodded. "Damn, I should have known the moment I woke up. Why?"

He didn't answer, he just stared at me. I slowly came closer to him, still a little hazy, but also curious. I wanted to learn something about him, the state he was in, I wanted to know more about death itself, about ghosts. It felt wrong. But since when knowledge was ever wrong? 'When it kills people,' a quiet voice in my head said. It wasn't Riario this time.

I reached for his hand and backed off when I passed through him. It was like dipping in a freezing water. Like he was there and I could feel him but couldn't grab him, couldn't hold him. I touched him again and shivered.

"Artista."

I jumped. My hand passed through his body, not stopped by anything. Riario winced. Maybe he could feel something too.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. I could barely hear him. "I'm weak. I need... Strength. To talk. And to be here."

Yeah, minutes ago he talked just fine.

"Good for you because I would punch you in your fucking face if only I could" I clenched my fists. „What was it about in the workshop? Killing somebody? Are you crazy?"

"I need strength," Riario repeated. "And I feed on your distress. Fear, anger, negative feelings. Body warmth. "

"Don't remember agreeing to be your meal," I mumbled. "What about changing your diet? Positive emotions must taste even better."

He just raised his eyebrows.

"In fact, guilt is the best," his voice was beginning to fade away. His figure was disappearing again and I would have let it if only I hadn't unanswered questions.

Guilt. What was I guilty about? What did I regret?

The soldiers I killed with my machines. Letting Riario take Nico. Almost killing everyone again. Dragging Zo in the mess. Helping the Turk that time in the tavern, taking his clues, following them, finding the key and the book...

Suddenly he became quite visible again.

"I'm really sorry about this, artist. I do need your help."

I closed my eyes for few seconds. I wanted to refuse, to tell him to go to the Hell or to his beloved Pope but... But his death was my fault too, wasn't it? I killed him. And he was my ally, my enemy, my rival, my friend.

"Why me?" I asked anyway even though I was lost already.

"You are the one I made a promise to."

I blinked. I was alone again. No, there was somebody on my left, walking on the shore. Riario was gone, though.

"If we depart this place without the Book of Leaves, I will kill you myself."

And we did.

Zo was really heavy. Normally it wasn't a problem, he was the one that had to drag me sometimes .It was a bit annoying when it was time to go back home but he couldn't even keep his damn balance. He had to lean on me to avoid lurching from wall to wall, falling into a hole or killing himself in some creative way. It was okay. He could throw up on me at any time but it was okay. We staggered up like we were completely drunk.

I was sober and Zo wouldn't approve. He had dragged me to the bar for several reasons - like the fact that I completely freaked out without a reason and then escaped before he could make sure I was okay. He wanted to intoxicate me to, as he said, make me forget about worries. He would be mad if he knew I only had one drink. But in the morning he wouldn't remember a thing.

We stormed into the workshop, almost stumbling over the poor doorstep. I cursed. Zo was doing everything in his power to make us fall down.

"Fuck you," I said, pushing him off me. He crashed on the ground and started laughing. After a second he looked up at me, his gaze not really focused.

"You know, Leo... Any time," he smirked. "Whenef... When you want."

I rolled my eyes.

"Stop hitting on me or you will sleep on the floor."

"Not fair!"

"Okay, you will sleep on the floor anyway," I ignored his loud protests. " I would take you upstairs but we won't make it up there. Want a blanket?"

Silence. I stared at him, a little worried, but then he started to snore. I laughed, throwing my best blanket over his body. I could already guess how the next morning was going to look like - he was going to moan about his headache and sore bones, promise himself he won't ever go drinking with me again and do it next week.

I sat down at the chair near to keep him company or have some company for myself.

"Your entertainment is not proper," Riario said, suddenly appearing right next to me. I jumped because some warning would be welcomed! A sudden rush of my fear was enough to make him visible.

'"Yes, yes, no need to remember us you don't know what fun is. What are you even doing here?"

He coughed some water and then shrugged.

"I live here."

"No, you don't"

"But you wouldn't mind, would you?" he smirked , sending a shiver down my spine. It wasn't pleasant. Up to this point his face was blank and it seemed creepy, but this, this was even worse.

"Like hell I would," I mumbled. I had imagined what living together would feel like and if I should invite him there, but it... it was something else. "I mean, I don't feel stressed. Quite the opposite, in fact. You shouldn't even be there."

My gaze kept wandering back and forth. Riario. Zo. Riario. Zo. My friend was still sleeping peacefully, fine. I had to keep him this way. He had to be okay. I would wake him up to send him home but Girolamo was standing between us. I wasn't sure what would he do if I tried something.

"Don't lie. I can feel your emotions anyway, artista." He leaned forward, towering over me. Because of him I couldn't see Zo anymore, that stupid prick, I was going to... "You are scared. And I'm, I'm becoming stronger."

"Fantastic," I bit my lip. "So, are you going to kill me now? Because that's probably why you are here. Not like I'm going to let you or anyway, no, I will fight you, but... But we should just come to the point. If you don't mind."

I leaped on my feet and got away from him. Just a little bit. Standing wasn't safe either, nothing was this days, so I started pacing in circles, fast, but not as fast at my thoughts went.

"I don't want to kill you," he stayed in his place, watching me like a hawk. I stopped, surprised and that's when he laughed. "It's the other part of me."

"The other part of you...?"

"I guess death change people. I try to stay myself," he looked up, probably searching for the sky. Ceiling was blocking his view. "But I'm just so angry, too angry, sometimes I just want to hurt you."

I winced, "Lucky me."

"I still have control over myself, so yes, you are quite lucky. But it's fading."

He was so calm most of the time, so good at hiding his emotions. A cold, collected soldier of God. But I witnessed him lose his shit few times in my presence, something I wouldn't like to repeat. Of course, it was fascinating, but could end in him blowing up the door - or my head - with bazooka. And that was the nice scenario.

"So, what are we going to do?" I rubbed my temples. Bright ideas refused to appear in my head this time, leaving me confused and lost. Sitting down and waiting to be killed wasn't in my style, so I had to figure something out. But what? What could I do to help him somehow and save myself at the same time?

"They say that ghost disappear when they finish their business on Earth."

I knew stories like that. I heard them sometimes, at markets and in taverns, whispered in nervous voice. I had never really paid any attention to them. They seemed like another brilliant way to scare people and keep them in line and yes, they served their purpose pretty well. Some folks would follow strange paths, pay a lot of money just to protect themselves from something that didn't even exist.

I had known better. But the problem was, I hadn't, because a ghost was standing near, talking to me like it was a normal night.

"But it would mean killing me. Not a good plan, you know."

Let's hope he wouldn't suddenly change his mind about the matter.

"The body must be buried before the soul can leave," he whispered quietly. "Mine is in a lake."

I opened my mouth. I had seen Zita's ghost - or whatever it was - walking away before we buried her. It wasn't the case, it had to be something else. But I couldn't bring myself to mention that, mention her. Even if it wouldn't help, Riario deserved to have a decent funeral.

"Alright. So Vatican it is. What do you think, should I take something to swim underwater?"

Riario didn't respond.

"No fucking way," Zo suddenly sat up, throwing my blanket away. I blinked. I started at him. His gaze was angry and concerned but totally focused. Why? Wasn't he drunk? Maybe he wasn't. But I would have seen something if he faking it? "You are not going to Vatican. Not in this state. Who the hell were you even talking to?"

"I... What? What are you talking about?" I could do better than playing dumb. Zo knew me to well too fall for something so simple as that.

"Bad answer," he said, patting a space next to him. I didn't take his offer, didn't even move. He gritted his teeth. "I'll help you a little. You were talking to yourself."

It seemed he couldn't see or hear Girolamo. The bastard disappeared the moment Zo spoke but still. This was going to be complicated.

"It's rude to eavesdrop."

He stood up and walked straight to me. I didn't want him so close to me, but I didn't try to back away. I didn't even avert my eyes, staring straight in his face.

"When did rudness ever stop us?" he grabbed my arm without a second of hesitation. "And I'm not going to apologize because I dont feel sorry and I would do it again."

"I guess you would," I couldn't decide if I should be annoyed or touched. Both would be better than this fear. "But it's not, it's not... Necessary. I'm fine."

"Come on, Leo. You are not fine. You weren't fine since that damn journey," he tugged me in his direction, making me lean on him. His arms were suddenly all around me and he was so warm. I pressed even closer, without really meaning to. "Can't you just understand that I... We care about you? Nico is sick worried."

"Of course I can and I do," I sighed in his shoulder. "It's just not important."

".. You are so selfish."

"Shut up."

"No, I mean it," he stroked my hair. I hissed, not really amused. "I have to pretend to be drunk to make you say anything. Please, Leo, what's going on?"

I pulled away. He didn't try to stop me, he just watched me, but I could spot sadness in his eyes. I looked away and began pacing again, clenching my fists, almost screaming at this point. He wasn't going to believe. No way he would. But he could... He should know. He should know what was going in my head, he deserved it.

"But don't blame me if you regret it," I took a deep breath. "I was talking to Riario. I am talking to him. Not right now, but often. I can see him. He is like... Like the Turk, you know? I can see him, only me, but he is real, Zo, he is. He needs my help."

Silence. Zo started at me, confused, trying to figure out if I was serious. I didn't add anything, just waited for him to mock me. To call me crazy and then ran away because who would want to hang out with a nut like me?

"So... The prick is talking to you."

"Yes."

"And you can see him?"

"Clearly."

"And you are not trying to trick me here?"

"For fuck sake, Zo, no."

He sighed loudly and dramatically threw himself on my chair.

"Leo, when was the last time you've slept? And no, don't give me that look, what are you, four?"

I rolled my eyes. I was only frowning a little and maybe trying to kill him with my gaze but nothing more, I was too focused on finding arguments different than 'because I say so.' Of course I didn't need his permission, but it would be nice if he understood.

"Yesterday."

It felt longer than that. My eyelids were heavy, it was becoming harder and harder to keep them open.

"Off to bed then. You will need your strength, a road to Vatican isn't an easy one."

"I don't need sleep yet! ... Wait, what? You believe me?

'Are you mad? Of course not," he snickered. "It sounds ridiculous and you are crazy and irresponsible, blah blah, there's no point in trying to stop you."

I grinned.

"You know me so well."

"Too well for my own good," he rolled his eyes and I laughed. A little forced, but still, me still having strength left to smile was nice. It meant it wasn't that bad yet. "But I'm coming with you."

Normally, I would be thrilled. I would expect him to offer his help and if he didn't, I would find a way to drag him with me. He was my team, my friend, I could do without him but I wanted him at my side. I guess I was selfish after all.

But at the moment I felt only displeasure and anger. I wanted to shout at him for being ridiculous. I wanted to grab him and smash his head at the nearest wall and... This were Riario's emotions, weren't they? They were dark and strong. Unfamiliar. It was cold again, was it a warning? 'Take Zo with you and I will hurt him'? I couldn't risk it.

"What-? No way!"

"You need to have someone to talk to. Someone real," he patted my shoulder. I backed off quickly. "and he isn't real You may think that you see Riario but you don't because, fuck him, he is dead. You want to know what is real? Me. And don't think for a second I'll just leave you alone with your mind.

"Zo... " He didn't understand, he was trying to help but he was so wrong. I did talk to Riario. I did see him. He was real, he was dangerous. "He's a ghost."

"Whatever, Leo, I don't care. You won't stop me from coming."

"But I," Riario's voice was cold, "I will."

Zo didn't hear his comment. He stood up and went for the blanket still lying on the floor. I wanted to scream at him to just get the fuck out of there but my voice was gone. I tried to run, go somewhere far away from there, yet I stayed motionless.

My body moved and suddenly I was holding a knife in my hand. I stalked towards Zo - and no, no, oh God, no - he didn't see me coming. He was crouching on the floor, his back completely vulnerable. I felt Girolamo's anger or was it mine? I knew exactly what he intended to do and there was this sick joy, impatience, I wanted to get it over with. This was just some unworthy thief and he was standing in my way; it was time to remove him.

"Stop!" I choked, trying to win back my control, my body, my mind. Riario didn't allow that.

Zo looked up at me, confusion quickly tuning into fear.

"Leo?!"

I took a swing at him but he threw himself on the ground and I missed. For the first time in years I prayed, asking him to run but Zo, this fool, stayed. He was staring at me with terror in his eyes. He was dodging my every attack but he couldn't keep on like this forever.

"No, no, no, please, stop-" I repeated over and over again, not sure if I was even doing it aloud.

A blow straight to my head dazed me for a few seconds. I blinked, losing my rhythm and that, that was Zo's perfect opportunity to flee. To save himself. Instead he took a step forward, grabbed my shirt and tugged me forward. So stupid of him, I was still holding a knife in my hand and I could kill him.

Our lips met.

The idiot was fucking kissing me. The fact he was doing it wasn't a suprise - I knew he liked me that way from the beginning, it was only a matter of time he did something about it. His timing and the choice of moment, that was unbelievable. I just tried to stab him with a knife! But I didn't. His warmth won with Riario's coldness and I was in control again. No whispers or strange feelings or murderous urges. Just me and Zo in a quiet room.

I should have pulled away immediately but my free hand was already in his hair and tears were clouding my sight and I leaned even closer.

"We were thinking about having a child," Riario said. "And then I stabbed her. Knife in her heart. Knife in HIS heart."

Zo howled.

I shouted and pulled away and looked at my trembling hand.

"Leo..." his voice was weak and his eyes, oh no, his eyes. There was pain in there, there was reached for me but I took few steps bac, out of his reach. He laughed like he couldn't believe what had just happened. I couldn't, too. "Leo, wait."

But I was already moving towards the door, shaking. He tried to follow but he was losing his strength as quickly as he was losing his blood.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Zo."

"It's just an arm. Leo, don't you fucking dare to walk away now-"

I should have stayed and helped, at least bandaged the wound. But I couldn't risk going near him again. I maybe have broken free in the last second but it wasn't enough. I didn't stop the blow completely like I should, I just change the direction. Instead in heart, the knife sunk into his left ar but it didn't matter. I had hurt him. How could I allow this to happen? How could I feel an echo of enjoyment?

I was dangerous, so dangerous. Riario wasn't even real, it was my mind, just my fucking mind going crazy.

"Sorry," I said for the last time and disappeared.

"Artista..."

Few hours passed and Riario was still trying to get me to talk to him. For the entire time I ignored him because apologises couldn't fix anything. He said he was sorry but he wasn't even real, he wasn't here, it was me.

"Da Vinci, there are soldiers coming," he hissed and that, that finally caught my attention. I looked around but didn't see anybody. Well, except of his watery shape. "From Vatican"

It would make sense since I was getting closer to Rome.

"Will they pay attention?" I asked, throwing my anger aside. Even if he was a product of my imagination, he could still make some good points and maybe provide some logic. "Recognize me?"

"Probably," he furrowed his brows. "I think so. You should hide."

So I did. I forced my horse out of the road and then laid down. Riario - my mind -was right. After few minutes a whole bunch of them appeared. When I was riding I had to focus on the road and there was also a numb pain from spending too much time in a saddle. But now I could only wait for them to pass. I bit my lips not to shout; they were slow, too slow.

"It's my fault," Riario said quietly. "And I am-"

"Sorry," I growled under my breath. "Shut the fuck up."

"No," he didn't even show himself anymore, he was just a voice in my head. "I'm sorry for not only putting your friend in danger but-"

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up," it took all of my will power not to scream at him. I would draw some unwanted attention.

"Also for blaming you for something I had done," he just wouldn't give up. I covered my ears but it didn't help either. I still heard him. "I was the one who took Zita with me on that journey."

And that was something new. He admitted that it was his fault that Zita died? That his stupid promise was so absurd? That the vendetta against me was meaningless?

"So maybe you should kill yourself," I said and immediately regretted it. He was silent for a moment.

"I did. But it didn't help."

The soldiers finally passed us and I get up, thankful for a distraction. "Are they heading to Florence?"

"Maybe."

And here I was, helping him instead my beloved city. I decided to let the subject drop and started walking again, leading my horse behind me. My legs were weak but the poor animal had done a lot already.

"Are you in control now?" I still didn't want to talk to him. I was furious and mad… But I had already said something to him. It was harder to keep quiet after that. "Or will you go crazy again?"

"I can't promise anything, it's getting harder and harder."

I was silent for a while. What if he was lying, leading me astray? What if he just didn't want to take responsibility for his actions? Should I trust him? No. Did I have a choice? Not really.

"Lupo Mercuri. That was your friend," I didn't even wait for his response. I remembered the man well enough, despised him. "Do you trust him?"

He nodded.

"Yes, although it was a long time since we have last met."

I hesitated, because who the hell know what he would do about my plan. I was scared to say something but then again, I couldn't just let my fear win.

"He knows something about ghosts. About exorcisms."

"He says so. But artista, his methods…" he shook his head. "You do know them. You know what it consist of. Don't ask for his help."

I closed my eyes.

"We shall see."

"I won't let you."

I rolled my eyes, not stopping or slowing down. My legs burned but I knew exactly where I was heading to. I was there before and I didn't forget - even though it felt like it happened centuries ago. Finding Lupo was another problem since Riario wasn't going to tell me but I was going to find a way.

"You cannot stop me," I said with fake cheerfulness. I was years away from being happy but sulking around wasn't going to do me any good. If negative emotions made him stronger, I had to remain positive.

"As much I don't want to talk about it, I can."

And he could. He could make me do anything but… But there had to be a good way to protect myself from it. Everything had it flaws and weakness, all I had to do is find them. And use them against Riario.

"How does it work, anyway?"

"It's hard to explain, artista," he sighed, looking around. "I can make you do some things. I can share my emotions and memories with you."

"Possess me. So unholy," I faked a laugh. He missed the joke, of course, and made a miserable face. "And you are becoming stronger."

"Yes."

"So," I stopped, "I guess it's no use asking about Lupo. At least take me to the lake."

That he did, without a question.

I threw a stick in and watched as it floated in water. Riario was staring at me, his eyes following my every move. I could scratch my nose slightly and he looked like it was the most interesting sight in the world.

"What?" I asked finally, deciding that Nico was more subtle than him.

"It's not often that I have occasion to see you work," he shrugged, trying to sound nonchalant but failing miserably. Normally I would find it funny but given everything that happened lately… It only made me feel uneasy.

"I'm not really doing anything, it's just a stick."

"But you've been throwing things in the water for some time," he craned his neck to have a better look. "Clearly, that means something."

"Yes! That I don't have any ideas and you, you are not helping."

He took a few steps back but kept watching me. His silent gaze was making me insane, I couldn't concentrate like that. My thoughts kept going back to the previous events, flowing around Zo. Was he okay? Would he ever forgive me? But really, how was his arm? The look on his face…

"It's not your fault."

I cursed. His new ability to read emotions was the worst thing ever.

"For fuck sake, leave me alone and come back when I'm finished."

I didn't really think he would obey. Instead of just vanishing he jumped into the water and disappeared under the surface. I raised my eyebrows. My mind was shouting at me that this change in his behaviour was important but I didn't know why.

FFFFFFF

"I've found it."

I jerked away and looked around confused. Where was I? Why was the floor so wet? What was Riario doing in my room?

Oh. It took me a second to remember where I was and another one to realise that I had fallen asleep on the ground.

"Found what?" I stood up, yawning. My muscles were sore and stiff and even stretching them didn't really help. "Your body?"

He frowned, obviously uneasy. The compassion I suddenly felt was irritating, I shouldn't care about him, not after what he had done. Not when he could feel my sympathy.

"Yes. It's near the shore. Maybe you will be able to dive in and pull it out."

"Good."

I took off my boots and shirt but decided to keep the trousers on. It would be rather uncomfortable any other way, especially since he. Wouldn't. Stop. Staring.

"So… No brilliant devices." He tried to hide disappointment. I looked at him, shaking my head, forcing a smirk on my face.

"There is no need. Led the way."

The next few minutes felt like torture. The water was icy cold and I had to stop myself from shivering. Soaked clothes and slippery bottom made it hard for me to walk. I was slowly getting out of my breath. Riario on the other hand was becoming more visible with every second.

He stopped. At this point he almost looked alive. "It's here."

I frowned. The water was already reaching my chest so it was going to be a long swim. I couldn't really see through it, it was too dark and dirty. I moved my foot, trying to at least localize it.

I hit something with my toe, making Riario tremble. I didn't even have to ask.

"Alright. You sure you can't do that yourself?"

"No," he shrugged, "I still have too much problem with touching things."

'Still.' The word was important too but I wasn't thinking. I was too desperate to get out of the water as fast I could.

I took a deep breath and dived under the water. I swam with few powerful strokes and reached the bottom in no time. My eyes were wide open but I couldn't really see anything. I looked around, feeling a little discouraged. But there it was; a fuzzy figure which could be human. Or not, since it was too hard to see. Maybe I should have made fire that could be light under the water.

My lungs were already giving up by this moment but I still could do it. I forced myself to get closer, trying not to think too much. I grasped the body with my hands, holding it as hard I could. I took off, hitting the ground with my feet to give myself some speed. I began to swim up, dragging the thing (Riario?) with me. There it was! The surface! I speed up a little bit and sticked my head out of the water. I managed to catch a big breath and then a smaller one before something pushed me back under the surface.

I immediately began struggling, trying to get out because, fuck, I needed the air! But it - I hoped it wasn't Girolamo, oh how I prayed for it - grabbed my by hair and held firmly.

I tried to kick and tried to break free and tried to get away but then Riario's body began slipping from my arms and, damn, I cried out and the water filled my lungs and they burned, oh how badly it hurt.