Tanith Panic, I'm so happy you like it! I relate to Dylan too and I agree that Ben would be more likely to get through to Dylan than some of the others. Besides, being mean to Ben is like kicking a puppy and I somehow can't imagine Dylan doing that!
CBloom2, thank you for your review. It was a horrible moment when Dylan shouted at Lofty in the last episode - completely wrong of Dylan so I felt for Lofty, but I could also feel all the pain behind Dylan's outburst. I love how the Casualty writers can make me see both sides of an argument!
Tato Potato, Lofty has always seemed like a really empathic character to me - he doesn't always know what to say, but his facial expressions are very eloquent. I'm enjoying giving him a voice! Thank you for your review.
xXxAnInspiredWriterxXx, thank you very much for your review and your kind words. I will keep going - Chapter 3 needs a bit of rewriting as I've had an idea that I hope will improve it, but I will try to put it up tomorrow.
Jinxy13112, thank you for your review and the correction. I have to admit I'm very confused about the nurses and who is at which level, so I do need to sort that out!
Ben was keeping a close eye on Dylan.
He often did keep a close eye on Dylan, simply because there wasn't anywhere he wanted to look more, but it was different now.
Now, Dylan needed someone to look out for him, and Ben knew this was one thing he really couldn't mess up.
He felt his heart aching again as he remembered the way Dylan had looked at him. Not, it was true, in the way he most wanted Dylan to look at him, but in a way that had got to him all the same. He was so used to Dylan displaying little emotion other than disdain and impatience – both of which had been directed at Ben more times than he liked to remember – and to see him as he'd been yesterday had been painful.
There had been fear in Dylan's eyes as he'd talked about the number that bothered him. Horror as he'd confessed his belief that neglecting certain actions would cause a patient to die. Even though Ben had never been in Dylan's situation, he knew what it was like to be afraid. He knew what it was like to be willing to do anything rather than risk losing a patient.
Dylan's voice had even come close to trembling once or twice and all Ben had wanted was to put his arms around him and tell him everything would be all right.
But he couldn't. Even if he wasn't afraid of Dylan's reaction, you could never be sure anything would be all right in this job.
"Haven't you got any work to do, Ben?" asked Dylan as he passed Ben in the corridor, but Ben liked to think there was less bite in his voice than there would usually have been.
"Why?" said Ben. "Have you got any work for me to do?"
Dylan rolled his eyes eloquently and started to walk away, but then he stopped and spoke in a low voice. "You can't hang around here all day, Ben. You need to be doing something."
Ben nodded and watched as Dylan went to collect a patient. As he walked, he glanced at the cubicles. Ben saw his shoulders tense. Ben hurried towards him, but Dylan was already walking away.
Ben stopped and looked at the cubicles and saw immediately what was wrong. Cubicle 4 was the only one that was empty.
Ben dashed into the cubicle and looked around desperately. He didn't know what he could do. There wasn't time to remove the bed. If only there was some way of getting a patient from somewhere. Dylan couldn't use the cubicle if it was already occupied. But Ben could hardly run into the waiting room and grab a patient.
Unless... unless Ben himself was the patient...
Ben picked up a sick bowl and climbed onto the bed.
Seconds later, Dylan arrived. He stopped outside the entrance to the cubicle. "Ben, what are you doing?"
"I don't feel well," said Ben. "So I'm lying down."
Dylan hesitated. The correct thing to do would be to send Ben away so he could treat his patient. But Dylan didn't do it. "Then we'd better find somewhere else." He and his patient left.
Ben climbed off the bed and returned the bowl to its correct place. He tried to feel relieved he'd saved Dylan this time, but he was worried. He'd been able to help Dylan because he was in the right place at the right time, but next time, things could be very different.
Ben soon discovered that keeping an eye on Dylan made his job much more difficult, but nothing would have made him stop. He was shouted at by Rita for not paying attention and by Tess for dropping something. He couldn't blame Rita as he had been thinking about Dylan rather than listening to her explaining something he'd done hundreds of times before, but he was sad to be shouted at for being clumsy again. Ben only really became clumsy when he was nervous – and at the moment when he'd dropped the files, he'd been seriously worried. He'd just heard someone cry out and was convinced it was Dylan, but he couldn't explain that to Tess so he just apologised and accepted her harsh words.
Tess had been harsh quite a lot lately. Ben suspected she had something on her mind and was concerned - but Dylan was the person who needed him now.
As soon as Tess let him go, Ben hurried off in search of Dylan and was relieved to see him coming out of Cubicle 6. Their eyes locked for a moment and Dylan came towards them. "Is there a problem, Ben?" he asked. His words were sharp, but Ben was sure it was only for the benefit of anyone listening.
"No. I thought I heard someone cry out," said Ben. "Like they were scared or something."
"Oh. That was me," said Dylan.
Ben's heart was in his mouth. "You? Are you okay?"
Dylan sighed. "Ben, don't be ridiculous. Of course it wasn't me who screamed. It was me who caused the scream. Some people have a very low pain threshold."
"Oh right. Sorry," said Ben, and moved away, but he wasn't nearly as downhearted as he could have been. If it had happened yesterday, he was sure Dylan would have told him not to be ridiculous and left it at that. But this time, impatient as his voice had been, he'd said everything he'd needed to say to assure Ben he was all right.
As Dylan pushed the trolley towards Resus, he tried to work out which bays would be available. He thought there were only two currently in use as he'd been trying to keep track of them. He'd done this every day since he'd realised he couldn't work in Bay 4. He knew that knowing beforehand wouldn't necessarily help him, but he felt like he had to be prepared. He had to think ahead and try to divert the patient if Rita, who was at the head of the trolley, seemed to be leading him into Bay 4.
It was his job, wasn't it, to do his best to save the patient? That was all he was doing. Keeping the patient safe. Doing everything he could to ensure they didn't die.
They entered Resus and Dylan saw that he was right. Bays 3 and 4 were both free, but 4 was nearer and he could tell that Rita was gently steering the trolley in that direction.
Dylan looked around in a panic. There had to be something he could do; something he could say. He should have worked this out beforehand. Ways of avoiding Bay 4. Ways of convincing the nursing staff and paramedics that they mustn't take the patient there – but without revealing the truth because no-one else would understand.
Ben understood, but Dylan didn't think he could help this time.
Ben was in Bay 2, but he didn't seem to be doing anything. He looked up and his eyes caught Dylan's.
"Rita?" said Ben, and ran towards her. Then he appeared to slip or trip or something and, with a cry of pain, he disappeared from Dylan's view.
"Ben: what are you doing? Get up!" said Rita. "We're trying to get the patient in there."
"I can't," said Ben from the floor.
Dylan still couldn't see him. He felt panic rising. He needed to know if Ben was helping him out of a difficult situation again or if he'd become another casualty of Bay 4. It was true that Ben hadn't died, but perhaps there was a limited danger to nurses too.
"What do you mean? Why can't you get up?" said Rita.
Dylan spoke quickly. "We can't worry about this now. Take the patient into Bay 3."
Rita looked again in Ben's direction. From the set of her shoulders, Dylan knew it wasn't a friendly look, but to his relief, she turned back to them and said in an irritated voice: "Bay 3 then."
As the trolley swung away, Ben finally became visible. He was sitting on the floor, holding his knee. Dylan made a quick survey. There were no obvious signs of pain. He didn't look pale or tense and there was no audible change to his breathing.
When Dylan mouthed 'thank you' at him, Ben gave the tiniest nod.