Coming Home 2

a/n Starclipper01, I found it!

Reminder to all, hit the you tube to catch Paul Gross singing Robert Mackenzie and of course Ride Forever. Also Sarah McLaughlin's Possession.

Maggie's head rests against the crimson tunic of her subordinate. Her fingers twist in the snow white lariat trailing down his chest.

"Damn you," she whispers.

He doesn't help by chuckling lightly and gently rubbing up and down her back. Lightly she jerks the soft rope. He nuzzles into her temple and kisses it.

A knock on the door breaks their moment. She tries to pull back, but he shakes his head. Pressing one finger to his lips, motions for her to be quiet. Smiling, she stretches up and kisses him over that finger. Pulling it loose, he sucks in her essence.

Ray knocks again, "Hello? Inspector, I was looking for Constable Fraser. Hello? Anyone in there?"

He tries to open the door, but with Benton's weight and Maggie's pressing, it doesn't budge. Benton pulls back making little kisses over her.

Heated, she softly begs, "I. Want. You."

"Fraser? Are you in there? I have a lead on that case we were working on."

Ben holds her back and whispers back, "No. I was hurt that way once before. Not again."

Pulling back a little further, looks deep into his soft eyes. She can see the pain. He steps back and puts a hand to the handle. She straightens her suit and nods when she is ready. Benton opens the door.

"Hello Ray. Sorry, confidential conference."

Ray looks between Benton and Maggie. Ben's uniform is always immaculate, but touches of lipstick? Inspector Dragon Lady also always perfect an in control. Now nervous with smeared lipstick. Thrashed office? OH!

"The train?"

"Yes, Detective. What do you need?" Maggie tries to be rid of the Chicago officer.

Narrowing his gaze he gives a questioning tone, "Uh, can I borrow Benny? I mean the Constable?"

"Sure. We will resume later."

Ben cants his head to Ray, "I'll be right there. Just give me a moment," and shuts the door in his face before the detective can say anything more. Maggie has retreated back around her desk so he has to lean across. She slips a palm across his jaw as he leans in for his good-bye kiss.

"You're beautiful, Margret."

She snickers thumbing his lip, "And you are wearing lipstick."

Flushing lightly, she finds her tissues and dabs it off. "We leave at eight tomorrow. Pick me up at home." Reaching into her desk, she hands her keys across.

Accepting them nods, "I won't be late." With that, he slips out the door.

Maggie sinks to her chair and plants her forehead to the desk top. "What am I doing? Damn him."

Heading out of the consulate, Ray asks, "So what was that all about?"

Ignoring the prying looks, Ben responds, "Like you said, the train incident."

Ray steps in front of him halting the taller man, "No it's not. You still have smudges of lipstick.

Ben leans in, "Not here, not now." Stepping around the bewildered Ray, heads towards the car.

Ray turns on his heel and scratches his head, "Dragon Lady and Benny?" Looking up he bellows, "Hey! Wait up!"

~~00~~

Inside Benton's apartment, Ray watches his friend polish his boots and buttons while sipping a beer.

"So just what exactly happened on that train trip? What did I miss?"

"Oh you know the whole thing," Ben tries to avoid the interrogation.

"You're doing it again. Leaving out all the interesting pieces. Like what is going on between you and-"

"Ray," Benton lifts his head from the button making sure he has his friend's full attention, "listen to me very carefully. For I will only say this once. And I only tell you this because you are my friend. Listening?" Ray nods. Benton swallows hard and then speaks slowly. "A gentleman does not kiss and tell."

Ray spews his beer. The liquid spray lands on the wolf lighting a low growl.

Choking, Ray tries to formulate his thoughts, "Whoa, wait! You KISSED Dragon Lady? It that what happened to your hat?"

Benton shrugs.

"Oh my gosh…" Ray's brain begins formulating, "Damn, that must have been some kiss!"

Benton flushes and returns to his polishing.

"It was, wasn't it?!" he ponders a bit more putting it all together, "So she likes you. And this whole time you thought she hated you. She must have the hots pretty bad for you. And now you are both off to Quebec for celebrations and commendations."

"Inquisitions, don't forget," he snorts.

Ray snickers and leans in, "So did you mention the kiss in your report?"

Benton drops his hands and glowers at his friend, "Would you grow up? You don't realize how hard it has been at the office, okay? She's been avoiding me and I've been a bit confused myself."

"Except earlier today. I bet you picked up right where you left off. The lipstick, eh?"

Silently, Benton hangs up his uniform and puts his supplies away. Ray can see that maybe he has gone too far. Remembering how when he loved Victoria, he nearly lost his life. But being in love with your superior, it could kill his career. It would be just like running his heart through with a bullet.

"I'm sorry, Benny. You really care about her, don't you? She's beautiful but that cold, hard, fierce exterior-"

"-Is a front. There is a very real woman in there. Warm, alive, passionate woman underneath… if only she would let it out."

"Do you think you can?"

"I don't know." Tipping his head to the side, he smirks, "But I sure do admire her strength."

Ray asks very carefully, "Are you in love?"

Benton pulls away to finish the dishes, "Do you remember Victoria?"

"The bitch that shot my best friend?" Benton furrows his brow to the harsh words. But Ray isn't finished, "Yeah, I remember her. She nearly kill you."

He nods, "I know. I loved her badly and was betrayed. I can't go through that again."

Ray leans in supportively, "This one is different, Benny. She'll send to you to the Northwest Territories first."

He smiles, "She tried to. I even told her to."

Ray pulls on his beer and shakes his head, "You, my friend have it bad. Just be careful. It's your heart I worry about this time, not your life."

Benton laughs with him.

~~00~~

The next morning, Benton makes his way to her luxury apartment front door with Dief at his side. Softly he knocks on the door. In a warm sweater and black slacks, she answers the door. The stern face is back, but lit with warm eyes. Slowly her smile comes out. Silently, he takes the bags from her hands and smiles back. Silently they walk together to the car. Diefenbaker looks between them both.

Benton loads the bags and she asks, "Is he coming too?"

"I couldn't leave him in Chicago alone. Besides, he hasn't seen Quebec."

"He's a wolf. Shouldn't he be able to survive on his own?"

"Not here." Then softly he looks to his furry friend, "I'll miss him." Dief nuzzles into his caretaker's hand.

Maggie leans into Benton, "But you'll have me." Dief begins to growl.

Benton looks to the wolf and admonishes him with a stern tone, "Diefenbaker! You know this was the deal. You be good!"

Ben gives her a lopsided smile and drops a kiss to her nose, "We best be going."

~~00~~

The long drive gives them a chance to talk a bit. Still they avoid certain topics. For the most part the drive is quite leaving each other to their own musings. Arguments and supports battle within minds and hearts. Weak smiles back and forth show the other one is feeling it too.

~~00~~

Finally they make it and check into their separate rooms. That night is a banquet. Fraser is obviously uncomfortable to be in the -what he considers- luxury accommodations. Parting the curtains, he sighs heavily. Back on his native soil, but not. His eyes drift northwest, then look down to the busy street below. What does he really want for his life? Where does he really want his future to go?

Seated at the banquet table that night with Thatcher and Frobisher he tries to keep from staring at her, but finds his eyes drifting back to her again. Smashing in a black beaded gown of silk straps no wider than his lariat. A single thread thin gold chain bears a tiny gold dipped real maple leaf. In his own full uniform, they make quite the pair.

Except they are not a couple. They are colleges. Co-workers. Subordinate and superior.

She reaches under the table to hook one finger through one of his. For this, he tears his gaze from her and back to the speaker.

"And for our next commendation,…" the speech drolls on until Frobisher jerks Fraser's elbow.

"Come on, we're up." Together, they join a few others and get their metals.

This lavished banquet becomes a blur. A blur of hell. He would like nothing better than to take her in his arms and dance her off into the moonlight. She would like nothing better than to feel his arms around her again. Safety. How many times has she been stuck with him and yet felt protected?

And as hell would have it too, music begins to play. A few couples make their way to the floor. Without really asking, slips his hand into hers. She squeezes and rises. Keeping his hands in proper position, they move together as if they were one.

"I-I had no idea you could dance," she eases.

"There's a lot you don't know about me."

"I know," a painful truth that they really don't know each other. He knows it too. A deep breath accepts that. She tries to ease, "I'm sorry about your hat."

With a twinkle, he teases her back, "I'm not."

Her head bows. How can he do that? How can he just make her melt with a couple words and smile. She shakes her head.

"Hey, we'll figure this out, alright?" She nods. With a soothing thumb-rub to her clasped palm, he gives her a weak yet reassuring smile.

And then one of her fellow Inspectors comes in asking to cut in. Fraser has no choice, he steps back. Watching the rough treatment to his dance partner, Benton grimaces and clenches his fists. He can not afford to make a scene and destroy both of their careers. She shakes her head to Benton making it clear she is fine and not to worry. Still it kills him to see her in someone else's arms.

Frobisher leans in, "Look-it young Buck, if you want her, go get her."

Pulling his façade up tight, Benton glares back, "I have no idea what you mean."

Frobisher clamps down on the fellow crimson red elbow, "Don't be an idiot. Do not let her slip away."

Benton lean in and hisses, "It's not that easy. Careers are at stake."

Frobisher glares back with his own older wisdom, "Careers are not everything." With that, thrusts the foolish arm away.

Turning on his heel, Ben leaves the room. The terrace garden makes it easier to breathe. Diefenbaker is waiting for him, lifting his own paws to the wall and looking out over the city. Her world, not his.

Benton is not sure how long he is lost in his own muse until Dief whines and wanders away. Turning, he follows his wolf's target. Margret sitting on a bench wrapped up in her wool wrap with satin lining. He starts to move forward, but another superior comes to her side and they begin talking of business in Taranto. Benton turns away. She seems so happy to talk about the modern bustling city.

The ride back to Chicago is quieter than the trip up. Diefenbaker probably said more. For now, they are lost as to if there is ANYTHING between them. Or can there be? Or should there be? Will there ever be?

But no one wants to face the realities of it either. It's not just careers. They are from vastly two different worlds.

~~00~~

Some how acknowledging their attraction to each other is worse than holding it in. For now, if they make a move, it could destroy their lives and break hearts. How can being in love be such hell? Now more than ever, they find ways to be respectful, but keeping the distance from each other. They both know what is going on, but do not speak of it.

Too much honor and respect for each other. Secret smiles shot across to each other, speak more than words or kisses ever could. It's the supported look that shoots, I love you, but I will not be the destruction of your life. I respect your honor too much to do that.

All this is fine until… that ship. That mission. That look. And he can not stop himself. She does not resist him. Curling himself over her, clutches her to his heart. She press in and holds him just as tight. She will not let him retreat.

This is not a chaste kiss. No, this one says, I can not live without you. I can no longer play this game. I need you. I'm coming for you!

Pulling up for air, they both can taste the truth on each other's lips. And yet…

"Hey Benny, what are-? Oh am I interrupting?" Ray sees the desperate look between the clutched RCMP officers.

Margret pulls back avoiding the truth. Ben is grateful for Ray's distraction staving of the discussion for later as well.

Chicago comes into view. The officers turn back to duty avoiding their personal life…. For the moment.