Crazy/Beautiful: Chapter 2: Visitors
Sometimes I think that maybe Charlie was just trying to help. I mean he did what he thought was going to help me. I felt bad because he had to watch his only daughter mope around like she didn't have a soul. Renee sometimes visits. Those visits are normally the ones where she ends up bringing me things to keep me company although it doesn't help. I plead with her and tell her that I am fine and that Charlie is being paranoid. She never listens and says that's not what he says and then leaves me with the rest of the whacked out crazies that live here.
I really haven't gone crazy though, I hadn't even tried to commit suicide though. Charlie put me here so that he could protect me from committing suicide. He lied to corporation because he wanted for me to stay safe and happy. It didn't help. All I remember was sitting in my room folding the laundry on my bed and Charlie told me he was taking me somewhere for help. NO matter how much I pleaded, he just didn't understand. He never understood. He always thought Edward was just a 'boyfriend' to me and that I should have gotten over him. That is exactly the reason why I am here. I couldn't let go. I didn't want to lose the memory of my angel. My vampire angel. I wish sometimes that maybe Alice would see me here and tell him about what he has created. I know already that he has forbidden his family to check on me. I knew Alice wouldn't listen but still maybe she was too horrified to say anything.
Maybe, some day, I would get released and live on my own. Maybe then, He would come find me. Maybe, then, he will take me back and he would change me and we could live forever together. All of these options are maybes. I just wish he would realize that maybe he needs me more than he thought. I still loved him with all my heart and soul.
Edward. My Edward; The one guy that I loved. I should use the word guy lightly considering he wasn't human. Even though he was a vampire, I loved him. It didn't bother me that he killed animals for food. Didn't we all eat animal sometime or another? He was a bad character becoming good. He never would realize when I told him that he wasn't like the other vampires. He never believed anything other than that he was a monster. He was by far not a monster. Even if he was I would still love him with all my heart and soul. He was my life and now he was gone.
Sometime today the manager of my building said that I was to have a visitor a today. I always got excited when someone came to see me. I always wished that maybe it was him, but I knew it could never be. I actually brushed my hair today using what the "managers" told me I could only use to get dressed every morning. I never really cared about what I looked like unless someone was coming. I wanted them to know that I was not crazy and that I shouldn't be here. I knew far too much that they would never realize what Charlie had said. Everyone believes here that I am an intensive care patient and that I did try to kill myself. It was a lie that I had to live to not make myself look even crazier.
Since I have been here three months the psychiatrist had given me the privilege of wearing my regular clothes and not an ugly scrub. Dr. Baker was a very kind women and somewhere deep down I think that she believed that I didn't belong in this retched place. She wanted me to be able to be comfortable in here. She usually pulled a few strings and I lived like I would have lived in a house; getting to have posters on my walls and sheets on my bed of m choice, like I said before I got regular clothes. Dr. Baker even sometimes brought things from home for me to eat. She was very nice to all her patients but I couldn't help but think that she favorites me a little more. She was the only thing that kept me sane.
I slowly walked down the white hallway; brushing my hands on the frameless posters. They wanted to keep crazy patients from injuring themselves. What a waste of time. I never understood why everything had to be white. It was so boring.
I had reached the familiar visiting room that recovering patients were aloud to use. It did not have a window between the human beings, just a table. You could actually touch person in front of you. I felt bad for the patients who couldn't have hugs or handshakes because they were to wild, or thought to be wild. It didn't make sense why they even invented this place. Couldn't they just leave the poor people alone? I guess I don't understand the half of it; maybe I am missing something.
I walked down to the table and sat in the oh so familiar chair. They opened the door to let the visitor in and I immediately brightened up.
There standing in the door way was my personal mechanic, Jacob. He looked sad to see me and I immediately motioned for him to sit down. HE smiled at me and I ran and hugged him. I wished he could stay forever.
"Jake!" I smiled and sat down again.
"Hi Bells. How are you?" He smirked knowing I wasn't really as crazy as they marked me as.
"My 'treatment' is fine," I giggled, "but I really wish I was out of here. I hate this place with a passion." I laughed sarcastically.
"Well, I miss seeing you in my garage. I wish Charlie hadn't gone this far sometimes too." He smiled and stroked the palm of my hand.
"Jake you realize I really am not crazy?" He smirked.
"I never thought you were crazy enough for here," he laughed out loud, "I just though you were born that way." I laughed with him. He knew that I didn't deserve this. He also hated the Cullen's for some reason revolving around the comment, Do they realize what they have done?
"Not funny Jake," I giggled, "I just wish sometimes that they would let me out sooner rather than later." He frowned.
"Bells, if there is anything in my power that can get you out of here I would do it." He brushed a piece of my hair. "I know that you are not this way Bella. You don't belong here. You are not like the people here. You had a life and a family and you laughed freely. You were beautiful and a talented chef. You don't deserve this. I promise I will get you out." I smiled knowing that was impossible.
"Jake just please, if you can, visit more often. I don't being alone for so long." He smiled and gave me one last hug before he had to be kicked out.
"You wish is my command Ms. Swan." He smiled and gave me one last hug before turning to the door.
"Hang in there Bells." He smiled sadly.
"I promise." I smiled and turned towards my own door and walked down the hallway. I heard his door slam and I was now being guided back to my room. My ugly white nasty room was even not comfortable after all Dr. Baker did. I was alone now and I felt the feelings take over as I reached my room. I huddled in the corner of the bed to the wall. I broke down on the knees and sobbed into my knees wanting to wash away the pain that would never end.
APOV (yay!)
I sat in our room in Los Angeles. It wasn't much fun. I went shopping earlier today and I couldn't help but remember her. I couldn't help but think of how she would have resisted going with me and Rose.
On the subject of Rose, even she missed her. She walked around the house just like before wondering what would have happened if she wasn't a vampire. She wanted to be human more than before. She missed Bella. We all did. Esme didn't garden very much anymore. Carlisle didn't talk very much when we were all together as a family. Emmett hadn't cracked a joke in I don't know how long. Jasper seemed to mope about. He believed it was his fault but we knew it wasn't him; it was Edward.
Edward hadn't talked to any of us in days. The only time we ever saw him was when we would catch a glimpse of him in the woods hunting. He sat in his room alone. He listened to music alone. He hunted alone. He never came out of that room unless Carlisle made him for a family meeting. He never talked though. I didn't understand why he left Bells if he still loved her.
Bella would have risked her life anyway to be with Edward. She technically was every day she was at the house. I just don't understand why he was hurting himself so badly. Maybe if I jut checked on her and guarded my mind at the same time.
I quickly grabbed lyrics from one of Jasper's favorite songs in front of me and started think the lyrics. I never realized he was a Linkin Park fan.
Crawling in my skin.
These wounds they will not heal.
Fear is how I fall.
Confusing what is real.
I totally was fooling him because there was no screaming so far. I quickly checked on Bella and I immediately gasped. There, in my vision, I saw Bella. She was huddled in the corner of a room; a white room. Bella was sobbing with her knees pulled up to her chest. This was not a good sign.
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming/confusing
This lack of self-control I fear is never ending
I immediately shrieked when I saw a women come in with a syringe. Bella's eyes were not fighting ones. She obviously knew what the woman was doing. Her eyes were not afraid just said.
The woman was telling Bella that she needs to calm down and sleep. She immediately stuck Bella with the needle bringing Bella into a deep slumber.
To find myself again
My walls are closing in
(Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)
I've felt this way before
So insecure…
I began to cry. What have we done? I quickly delved back in and saw the sign behind the women. Bella was being held in an asylum. What have we done? Poor Bella, she just wanted Edward.
I heard footsteps outside the door and I knew it must have been Edward so I began to hum quietly to myself like I hadn't done anything wrong. The door opened and in came Jasper. I let out a relieved breath.
"Alice what is wrong?" He looked concerned. I couldn't tell him.
"I have to leave. Now." He looked confused. "Jasper I can't explain just let me go." I quickly threw a bag together and ran out the door and to the garage leaving a very confused Jasper behind. I knew exactly what I need to do. I needed to save Bella.
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