Hello, all! I've added an author note to chapter 1 containing some content warnings so please check it out. As I'm sure you all expected, there is some sensitive content in this rate M fic and I want to do my best to make sure that this is as safe as possible for people to engage with.

Also, this was supposed to be up earlier and I apologize for that but on the plus side, there's going to be a new chapter again on Sunday so! Something to look forward to!

Content warnings for this chapter:

-none

Ch 2

"I want to challenge all the knights to a sparring match!" Killua announced proudly. "I want to learn how everyone fights, and what better way than to fight each other?"

"How are we sparring?" Lady Amane asked.

"With or without weapons, however you feel most proficient," Killua answered.

Gon happily volunteered to go first and stepped up to the sparring area with Killua.

Killua got a competitive grin on his face. "Okay, Gon, what do you want to be holding when I kick your ass today?"

Gon felt a tingling energy rushing under his skin. "I don't need a weapon to beat you!" Gon taunted.

"Oh? Hand to hand? Are you sure you want to take me on that way? You know that's my strongest style too."

"Positive."

"Okay, gentlemen, let's calm down," Master Wing interrupted. "This is still a training exercise of sorts, so please take this seriously."

Killua and Gon both got into ready stances and as one said, "Right!"

"Alright men, on my mark. Ready...start!"

Quicker than Gon as he had always been, Killua immediately moved in and launched a light, fast punch at Gon's ribs. Gon let the hit connect and then dove down to grab Killua around the thigh on Killua's weighted foot and pulled up to knock him off balance.

Killua caught himself with his hands behind him. He wrapped his legs around Gon's arm and pulled down, intending to pull him to the ground. Gon tried to use the momentum to roll out of Killua's grip and succeeded in rolling Killua off to his side. Killua had tried to hang on to Gon's arm to land himself on top of Gon, but Gon had had too much strength and was able to push Killua all the way over himself.

Killua moved to get up first, but Gon tightly gripped his shirt and pulled him back down in the dirt, sprawling. However, recovering quickly, Killua moved like he had no bones and wriggled his way out of the shirt to stand.

"Come on, Gon, you thought that was going to work on me?" Killua asked, brushing dirt off of his face.

Gon laughed. "Look at all the dirt on your face! It did work!"

Gon moved to take his own shirt off but Killua didn't give him the chance. As soon as Gon's vision was obscured, Killua rushed in and tackled him, holding his arms to the ground over his head with the shirt.

Or at least he tried.

When they touched, Killua felt his skin tingle and crawl. His heart sped up and he felt wobbly. He wasn't sure why his body was responding like this to Gon, his best friend since childhood. His brain was caught between "It shouldn't be exciting to touch him, I've touched him thousands of times," and "Touching Gon! Touching him! Touching him right now!"

But fortunately for Killua, Gon was having a similar experience.

When Killua touched him, Gon felt warm and a little dizzy, like he had been drinking. His awareness was fuzzy and he felt disconnected from his body but somehow even more acutely in tune with his senses as a result. He was aware of a desire to pull Killua closer, but something in the back of his mind made him hesitate.

Dazed by overstimulation, Gon lay on the ground under Killua with his own shirt still over his face, motionless except for his breathing.

Killua came around first and let go of one of Gon's arms. He was determined to cover up what had just happened inside his head so he put on a confident smirk as he pulled Gon's shirt up to uncover his face.

"Nice opening," he said. "I win."

Gon stared up at Killua with a far-off look in his eyes. Why did this feeling seem bad? He should want to be close to his best friend, right? It's normal he would feel love for Killua, right?

"Uh… Gon? Are you okay?" Killua asked. "Did you hit your head?"

Gon shook his head. "No, I'm okay," he answered.

Killua offered Gon his hand and helped him up. After the two had had a few moments to shake it off, Killua continued his sparring set with the other knights.

Gon couldn't help but stare at Killua the rest of the time. Watching how Killua moved as he fought, how fluid and powerful his movements were. Gon felt like his breath was taken away and he couldn't stop thinking about how he'd felt when Killua touched him. He was nothing if not entranced.

When training ended for the day, Gon approached Killua.

"Did… were you feeling that too?" he asked.

"Feeling what?" Killua asked, wiping the sweat from his face and upper body with a rag.

His skin was a little flushed from exertion and there were some bruises and welts where his other sparring partners had hit him. He wanted to touch Killua… Wanted… to touch him… wanted -

"Hello?"

Gon didn't realize he was staring and hadn't responded to Killua until Killua waved his hand in front of Gon's face.

"Gon?" Killua asked, making a face of mildly annoyed confusion. "Feeling what?"

"When we were sparring," Gon said. "That tingly, fuzzy feeling when we touched. Of wanting to be closer and - Killua, are you okay?"

Killua's skin had taken know a whole new shade of red. "N...no. I don't know what you're talking about," he stuttered out.

Killua quickly finished wiping down and pulled his shirt back on.

"See you tomorrow, Gon," he said hurriedly, rushing off.

Gon wanted to call out to Killua but Killua was definitely ending the conversation on purpose, and Gon didn't know how to stop him. He let Killua walk away.

xxx

Gon decided to take a walk through the forest. He hadn't been able to stop thinking about how he had felt during his sparring match with Killua. He always felt more clearheaded in the forest, away from people and surrounded by plants and animals.

Trees were his favorite. Big and strong but sensitive and flexible. He was always more than happy to listen to the palace botanists ramble about various plants, but had special attention for any discussion of trees.

Gon walked up to the oldest tree in the area, the mother to many of the younger trees near him. He placed his hands on its trunk and softly rested his forehead against the bark.

"I wish you could talk," he said to the tree. "I bet you know what's going on with me. You're old and wise. I bet you've seen it all."

Just then, Gon heard something moving through the foliage, and fast. He readied himself for a fight but relaxed when he saw a familiar face.

"Hi, Hisoka," said Gon.

"Hello, Gon~," Hisoka answered. "You're looking delicious as ever."

Gon gave Hisoka a look that said "that's sure a weird greeting."

"What are you in the area for?" Gon asked. "Do you have work?"

Hisoka laughed. Gon had no idea what Hisoka did for work. Somehow Gon was completely clueless of the fact that Hisoka was the widely infamous mercenary that he was. "No, not that you would know, since you still don't know what it is I do," he teased. "I'm here on more personal business - to convince someone I'm the man of his dreams and that he needs to run away with me."

"Hey, um, about that…" Gon trailed off. "You seem pretty… I dunno, experienced?"

Hisoka relaxed his posture to show he planned to listen to Gon.

Gon looked at Hisoka and asked firmly, "How do you tell that you're in love with someone? And not, like, just really good friends?"

Hisoka knew this must have been very important to him since Gon had looked Hisoka in the face while asking, which Hisoka knew Gon usually avoided.

"Oh?" Hisoka leaned up against a tree. "This sounds specific. Why don't you tell me about it? Who's the lucky person to have caught your eye?"

Gon tensed a little and redirected his gaze. "Well… it's Killua," he said.

"Oh, the king? My, my, we both have expensive tastes, Gon," Hisoka said.

"I guess… the last time we sparred it just felt - " Gon searched for a word before deciding on the very descriptive choice of, "... different."

Hisoka smirked at Gon. "That's less specific," he teased.

"It's hard to explain," Gon said. He continued slowly, "He tackled me and I felt like I'd been drinking. Like I could feel everything but it didn't make sense and… and I really wanted to be closer to him. I wanted to touch him and I wanted him to touch me. And I really wanted to kiss him. Really badly."

Gon paused for a moment and Hisoka was about to say something when Gon started again.

"It doesn't make sense though, right? We're best friends and he's the king and I'm a knight… I mean… why do I feel like this around him? Why suddenly?"

Gon made a mildly frustrated noise.

Hisoka held back a laugh. This kid was pretty obviously in love.

"You could be both," he said simply.

Gon briefly looked towards Hisoka. "Mm?"

"You could be both His Majesty's close friend and in love with him." So cute…

"Both…" Gon repeated to himself.

"Besides," Hisoka said, walking over to Gon and running his hands over Gon's shoulders. "If it doesn't go well, you still always have me."

Gon laughed. "How old are you Hisoka? You've gotta be at least as old as my parents! That would be weird!"

Hisoka shrugged. "Well, I've got my sights on someone else anyway."

"Yeah, you said we both had 'expensive tastes?' What do you mean?" Gon asked.

"Hmm, well, that's a secret," said Hisoka. Gon had mentioned his feelings about the man who currently had his eye more than once before, and they weren't positive.

"Well good luck with your king, little knight," Hisoka said with a wink.

"I'm not little!" Gon protested.

But Hisoka had already made his getaway and Gon was standing alone in a clearing again. He pouted briefly at Hisoka's comment but quickly refocused on the idea that he could be both Killua's friend and in love with him.

He could be both.

Both.

He was in love with Killua.

xxx

Kurapika was in the middle of dressing when a voice came through the cracked door.

"Kurapika?" the voice called.

"Pairo!" Kurapika responded.

Kurapika went to the door to let in his best friend.

"I thought you were going to be leaving with a caravan today," Kurapika said. "Did something go wrong?"

"It's just the weather," said Pairo. "Varri said it looks like there's going to be a storm tonight, so we're all waiting for his okay to leave, but it looks like we probably won't get it until tomorrow or the next day."

"Really?" Kurapika asked, looking out the window. "The sky is entirely - "

Kurapika stopped mid-sentence and turned to look at Pairo. "Did you…?"

Pairo started laughing and Kurapika couldn't help but join in.

"Some of the other traders didn't want to set out yet either so I suggested we color Varri's lenses so it looked like there was going to be bad weather!"

"That is terrible!" Kurapika said through his laughter. "He is going to be furious!"

"Maybe, but it's worth it to get some time to spend with you," Pairo said with a smile.

This kind of mischief was the exact kind of thing he could always count on Pairo for. When Kurapika was still a prince, the two of them had gotten into endless amounts of trouble together. Kurapika had had to refrain from such behavior once he had become king, but he hadn't and wouldn't ever forget those days he spent with Pairo.

"We never get to spend time together anymore. I've been so busy. The council needs to hurry up and let you take action against the Phantom Troupe already," Pairo said.

"I fail to understand why you continue to go out like this," said Kurapika seriously. "You are nearly entirely blind. You should not feel the need to put yourself through such dangerous work. There are safer things you could do here that are just as good for the kingdom."

Unlike Kurapika, Pairo's vision was too bad to be corrected with lenses. It had been terribly weak for his whole life.

Pairo laughed. "And miss out on meeting all these new people and learning new things? Not a chance!" he said. "You used the be the same way! You just got stuck being king."

"While you ran off and learned such a rough manner of speaking," said Kurapika.

"I'm cultured and travelled, King Kurapika," Pairo said teasingly.

The two shared a laugh.

"Since you are going to be here at least the rest of the day, would you like to get something to eat?" Kurapika suggested.

"Hell yeah!" Pairo said.

"Pairo! Such coarse language!" Kurapika said, somewhat taken aback.

"Cultured and travelled language, Kurapika," Pairo corrected.

Neither of them could keep straight faces long and they dissolved into laughter again.

"Alright, alright," said Kurapika, catching his breath. "Let us get something to eat!"

Pairo chuckled and nodded and they set off for the dining hall.

xxx

Killua paced around his room, still shaken up by the sparring match with Gon.

He definitely hadn't fought his best after it, as the many wounds on his arms and torso spoke to. He couldn't get his mind off of how he'd felt, how his body had reacted.

And then there was Gon!

"Were you feeling that too?"

Of course he was feeling it! But… what was "it"?

"Brother?"

Killua stopped pacing and looked up to see Alluka standing in the doorway.

"I was just out walking but you look upset about something," she said. "And you look like you have some wounds that could use tending."

"Nah, these aren't that bad," said Killua. "I'm fine."

Alluka crossed her arms and made a face of clear disbelief and annoyance. Killua averted his gaze. Why was she so damn perceptive…?

"Okay, fine."

A smile returned to her face and she immediately started looking Killua over, assessing what needed to be dealt with.

Alluka had, up until very recently, been hidden away in the castle dungeon for possessing powers their parents hadn't known how to control. Killua had managed to order her freed and restored to her position as princess before Illumi had become Killua's regent. In doing so, he had provided Illumi with leverage to argue that Killua needed a regent, saying that his actions marked him as impulsive. But Killua didn't regret his actions. He would never regret freeing his sister from her wrongful imprisonment.

Though she had been locked up, their parents had still allowed her access to most books and many other things to keep her occupied. Thanks to that, she had honed a few skills while imprisoned, one of which was some basic medicine.

"How did you get into this stuff anyway, Alluka?" Killua asked as she pressed a cool rag onto a particularly nasty looking welt.

"Whenever you'd come down to see me after Brother Illumi had done something to hurt you, Nanika and I always wanted to make you feel better," Alluka answered. "But since we knew you wouldn't ask us to fix it, we had to come up with another way."

Killua didn't know how to respond. Alluka and Nanika were always so kind, especially to him. He supposed he should have figured that had been the driving force.

"So tell me what you're worried about," she said, moving the conversation forward on her own.

Killua hesitated. He wasn't even sure what it was that he was worried about, but he definitely knew he didn't want to talk about it.

With Alluka it might be okay though.

"… Okay, but close the door first," Killua eventually relented.

Alluka closed the door and returned to Killua's side. He recounted to her the sparring match between Gon and himself and all the strange feelings he'd had.

"Aren't you just in love with him?" Alluka asked when Killua finished.

"Huh?!"

"Even the way you're getting upset now says so!" she insisted.

Killua wanted to deny it. Gon was his best friend, right? He couldn't have romantic feelings for Gon, right?

"Brother, your face is saying, 'I can't have romantic feelings for Sir Gon! He's my best friend!' but you're wrong," Alluka said. "It actually happens in romance novels a lot."

"But I couldn't… I can't… he's a knight," Killua said. "He's below me in class. The only reason we can even be friends is because we've been training together since we were kids."

Alluka looked at Killua as if to say, "Yeah? So?"

"So it's illegal," he said, answering her expression.

"Forget about that for now, Brother," said Alluka. "What are your feelings? What's in your heart?"

Killua's brows knitted together.

"Do you love Gon?" Alluka asked. "If you could be, would you be with him forever?"

"… Yes."

The word came out of Killua's mouth seemingly of its own accord.

Alluka nodded sagely as she finished wrapping another of Killua's sparring injuries. "This should do it for you, physically at least," she said. She kissed Killua on the cheek. "And now you know your feelings too, Brother."

He supposed he did know them now. But what was he supposed to do with them?