Chapter 2

Tests

When I open my eyes again, I'm standing in the school cafeteria, alone. On the lunch table directly in front of me is a brick of cheese. Next to it is a huge, menacing knife.

"Choose." I hear the boom of Frances' voice all around me, as if I'm only hearing the echo in a large cavern, not her actual voice.

Immediately, my hand flies to the knife. The cheese disappears.

I hear the dog before I see it. I whirl around and face a huge, snarling dog. I clutch the knife in my hand, and begin to back away. "Good dog," I mutter. The dog advances on me slowly. He is staring at my knife. I hide it behind my back and the dog stops. Curious.

I reach my hand out, palm up, and let the dog sniff it, careful not to flinch or move too suddenly. After what seems like an eternity, the dog licks my hand gently.

I blink and suddenly I'm back in the testing room.

"Well, uh, Mr. Eaton," Frances seems incredibly nervous. "Please, uh, excuse me, one moment, please, uh..." She gets up and nearly sprints to the door.

I sit up slowly, my head swimming.

I look at my reflection again. I look immensely tired. More tired than any other kids in my year at school. There are bags under my eyes and my cheeks seem almost hollow under my sad excuse for a beard. Curiosity gets the better of me and I unbutton the top few buttons of my shirt, stealing glances at the door as I peel it back to expose my collarbone.

I can see the bruises already.

I undo another button and slide my shirt off my left shoulder. The cut is deep and it doesn't seem to be healing too well. Father had said that he had gotten carried away. It was always his intention to leave no permanent marks on my body. That's why he had to do it so often, so I'd always have a reminder to reel in my disobedience.

I hear footsteps at the door and rush to button myself back up. The door opens and a tall Abnegation woman comes in, just before I've finished. Maybe she didn't see. I finish my last button and meet her eyes as she holds the door for Frances. It's Natalie Prior.

The concern in her face tells me she did see.

"I just didn't know what to do, Natalie," Frances sounds panicked, scared. Natalie faces her again and any sign she might have seen my bruises disappears from her face. Maybe I imagined it.

"You did the right thing getting me, Frances," Natalie says in a soft, calming voice. She smiles gently and Frances seems to relax. "You probably just hit something with your elbow while running the test. Don't worry. It's only your first year administering the test. I won't tell anyone if you don't."

Frances smiles gratefully at Natalie and practically skips out of the room. Natalie closes the door behind her and waits a moment before turning around to face me.

"Tobias, listen to me carefully."

Oh, no. I've hidden it for my whole life. I've hidden my shame for sixteen years and on the last day I screw it all up because of a mirror?

"Please, please, don't tell anyone." I feel tears burning behind my eyelids. My voice is desperate.

Natalie looks at me, her brow furrowed, for a long moment.

"You already know?" Her voice is low. It reminds me of Father's.

Confusion washes over me. "Know what?"

She closes the gap between us in two swift, long strides. I've never seen an Abnegation woman move like that. I shrink back from her and raise my hands to cover my face.

She grabs my wrist and I gasp in pain. My most consistent bruises cover my arms. She stops suddenly. And looks at my arm then at my face. Tears are flowing now and I feel my face growing red. She loosens her grip on my wrist, surprised.

"What... What happened here, Tobias?"

I look away, hiding my face, hiding my pain.

She begins unbuttoning my cuff and I try to pull away. "Tobias," she says firmly and I stop resisting. It's inevitable now.

She rolls back my sleeve and I know what she sees. It's what I see every day. I even see it through my clothes while I'm at school, burned there in my mind. The welts raised along the length of each arm are my reminder to stay unnoticed. It's for your own good, my father always says. This will keep you alive.

"Please, please, don't tell anyone, Mrs. Prior," I mutter through my tears.

I look up at her and see complete shock painted over her face. Did I imagine she saw before?

"Tobias, how did this," she stops. "This complicates matters." I watch as her face softens. "But let's focus on the more important thing for the moment. Tobias, do you know that you're different?"

I shake my head. What is she talking about?

"Tobias, listen to what I have to say." She lowers her voice to a whisper, "You are what is called Divergent. It means your test came back with an unexpected result. This is very dangerous. People will try to hurt–" She looks down at my bruised arm, then at my tear-streaked face, and corrects herself, "To kill you for this. Do you understand?"

I nod slowly.

"You have to do exactly as I say. I've deleted the data from your test, which shows that you could be Abnegation or Dauntless. That's important. You can pick either one." Her eyes dig into me. I nod. "I'm going to give you the test again. Take the knife and when the dog comes, I want you to immediately run away. Don't think, just do.

"Then you will run down the hallway and there will be a small child. The dog will still be chasing you, but I want you to stop when you see her. You'll then launch yourself at the dog and the simulation will end. Do you think you can do that?"

I nod, wiping the tears from my face.

"Good. That will give you an Abnegation result, which is what they'll expect."

I start to rebutton my cuff, to hide my arm from her again.

Sadness flashes over her face for a moment and it's immediately replaced with determination.

"Now lie back, drink this." She hands me another glass of clear liquid and I take it in my hand. I take a breath. One, two, three, four. I down the liquid in one long gulp and hand the glass to her, lying back on the chair.

I hear her voice just as my eyes close, "Be brave."