Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any part of it (wishful thinking.....) Credit to J.
Hold My Heart
It took Pansy almost 3 days to build up her courage. Taking Daphne's advice would do one of two things: it would either make Draco jealous enough to back off Astoria, or turn Pansy into a slut. She thought back to that night when she had sought out Daphne's advice.
"Make Draco jealous!" Daphne had announced cheerily. She thought a moment then added, "I'd go for Nott- Theodore Nott. You know Draco hates him."
"I don't need to make Draco jealous!" Pansy cried, immediately on defense. "I just…um…" but what cold she say? "I just don't want him hanging around that little slut?" 'That little slut' was Daphne's sister, Pansy reminded herself. Daphne gave Pansy a discerning look.
"I know, it's hard, but it gets easier every time." She gently placed one of her manicured hands over Pansy's and smiled. Well, who could it hurt? Except Astoria? Pansy thought silently to herself.
"Right, I'm in." Pansy responded. "Now how do I," She made a face, "Make Draco jealous?" Daphne laughed and spoke.
"Spruce up your look. Flirt with cute guys. Go out with cute guys. And make sure that Draco is watching." Daphne examined Pansy with a look of interest. "You'll be fun to makeover." That was how Pansy was sucked into a four-hour makeover. And she was literally sucked. As soon as she sat down in the chair Daphne provided for her, she heard a loud noise and discovered she couldn't get up. Daphne flounced around her, testing various makeup products, then wiping her face clean with magic. After almost two-hour of torture, Daphne told her to look. Daphne looked utterly delighted with her handy work and Pansy told herself not to hyperventilate. Its just makeup, Pansy told herself. If I don't like it, I can magick it off. Daphne led her in front of a large mirror and Pansy shut her eyes tight. "Oh come on, be brave. You look amazing, if I do say so myself." Undoubtedly Daphne was complimenting herself just as much, if not more than Pansy. But who would expect anything different from her?
Pansy carefully opened her eyes. She inspected her reflection. Her cheeks looked like her Aunt Esmeralda had been by and pinched them, just as she had when Pansy was a little girl. Her usually bare lips were coated in a red stain that made them look fuller than they really were. Daphne had put shimmery nude eye shadow on her eyelid, and it somehow made her eyes sparkle like they did when she laughed. Draco had told her about her strange, sparkling eyes one day back years ago when he had made her laugh so hard she nearly cried. Draco, Pansy sighed at the thought of him and her red-stained lips drooped into a frown.
"You don't like it?" Daphne asked and raised her eyebrows, as if to tell Pansy to say she that loved it, or else get out of the room. She had a menacing demeanor about her and Pansy feared if she said that she hated it, Daphne would lock her out of the room for good.
"No, no it's good." Pansy glanced at Daphne who still looked menacing. "I mean I love it." Pansy corrected herself and to her relief, Daphne smiled. Its just damn Draco, Pansy thought, aggravated.
"Excellent," Daphne patted the mad chair that held its company victim. I need to do your hair now. After another two wasted hours, or at least in Pansy's opinion, she was shaken awake by an irritated Daphne.
"Pansy? Oh, Merlin, you didn't actually fall asleep, did you?" Daphne asked accusingly to a sleepy Pansy. "Look." She ordered of Pansy. Daphne had layered Pansy's dark hair and somehow charmed it to look extra smooth and shiny. It was wavy, thanks to an enchanted curling iron. "You look like Snow White!" Daphne announced.
"What the hell is a Snow White?" Pansy asked, still irritated to be woken from her nap. Daphne giggled.
"Not a what, and who, silly! Apparently she's some muggle fairytale." Daphne pondered what she had just said. "Do you think she had pet faeries or something? Why would she be called a fairytale? Faeries don't have tails!"
"I dunno…and how have you even heard of her? She's a muggle!" Pansy questioned accusingly.
"Oh…well…I've just heard her mentioned," Daphne replied breezily. "But I'm sure you look much better than her and her pet faeries. At least you don't have a tail!"
That part of the transformation had been easy. It was the flirting with guys that was difficult. She tried to catch Nott whenever she could, but Daphne was right. That guy really did hate Draco and all of his friends. Am I still his friend? Pansy wondered. He certainly seemed to be getting along fine without her. She had spotted Draco and Astoria walking cozily around the castle holding hands. Once, on a particularly cold October day she even saw Astoria wearing Draco's Slytherin scarf. She was in a rage. Pansy had painstakingly enchanted his scarf to puff little smokes of green when he was in a bad mood. He thought it was just an old scarf that Dobby, his old house-elf, had charmed, but it had been Pansy's way of knowing whether it was a good idea to duck and cover when he was near. Unfortunately, the scarf had stayed smoke-free.
Infuriated, she sat next to Nott the next morning at breakfast. He looked rather uncomfortable, but Pansy acted oblivious. Down a bit to her right and across the table sat Draco, with, who else, but Astoria. Their heads were bent close together like they had been that first day back to Hogwarts, but this time…Oh, Merlin's beard, they aren't actually sharing food, are they? Pansy almost gagged. Nott looked at her, as if questioning her sanity. She flashed her a genuinely fake smile. She glanced over to the right and saw Draco staring right at her. This was the moment to let Draco she was over it.
She leaned close to Nott's ear and said breathily, "Maybe later we could…" she gave him a sly smile, "meet in the common room?" Nott looked positively astounded and she couldn't blame him. She'd never bothered to talk to him before then. "Please?" She added with an almost pleading look. She wanted to make him feel guilty for saying no.
"Oh, um, sure Pansy, but I kind of thought you were dating Malfoy." Nott said this flatly.
"Draco?" Pansy tried to look horrified. "No, no, no, no! Never," she promised him. And it was true they'd never dated. She glanced over Nott's shoulder to see Draco still staring at her. Bastard. Just to put him in a rage, she smiled at Nott.
"Perfect. Meet me there at quarter 'till midnight," and for good measure she kissed him on the corner of his mouth. "Look happy. We're going to have a good time." Pansy left the table, but not before seeing Draco's wounded, bewildered face. It was probably the most emotion that she had ever seen on his face. His mouth had dropped open in shock and his pale eyebrows were pulled together to create creases on his forehead. The worst to look at were his eyes. His eyes had always been his one giveaway. He could keep no secrets with eyes like his, always flashing with anger and illuminating when he was pleased. His eyes were acute daggers, while also looking offended at the same time. Her eyes caught his and for a moment Pansy almost gave in: she just wanted to run to him and comfort him, and she might have, if it weren't for Astoria. At that particular moment she happened to lean her head against his chest, unconscious of the war going on cast across his face. Pansy's insides instantly stiffened again at seeing public affection between the two.
Pansy felt so guilty about what she had done, she skipped Potions. Seeing his face would only provoke her until she shouted out in the middle of Snape's class that she was sorry. And she knew that neither Draco nor Snape would respond too kindly to that. She mustered up enough courage to continue throughout her day, all the while avoiding Draco and Nott. Poor Nott. She felt bad about what she had done, really. Using him. She prayed Daphne was right and it would get easier because, honestly, she wasn't sure she that she could continue.
Draco was back in bed, thinking. It was there where he did some of his best. And tonight he had a lot to think about. He kept trying to abolish the image of Pansy kissing Nott. No matter what he thought about, it kept coming to seeing her lips on his, over and over again. Had she moved on? Was she still pissed about the whole time of the month thing?
He was hurt. There was no other way to put it. Hurt that Pansy was still ignoring him. Hurt that she kissed Nott. Just hurt all over. He was also angry, but for what? He and Pansy had never dated. They were friends. He had thought they were best friends, but apparently not. I'm being ridiculous, he told himself. Instead of exhausting his thought out about Pansy, he recalled his time spent with Astoria.
Astoria was far too sweet to be a Slytherin, or so Draco thought. True, she enjoyed mocking her classmates, but she never did it to their faces, and never hurtful enough to provoke a fight. He felt protective of her. Her small, thin frame seemed too delicate: as if it might break under pressure. When the held hands, hers slipped inside his like a child's would and her honest, cobalt eyes only intensified her innocence.
Although Astoria looked like a dainty girl, she was really quite tough. The third years were being taught a duel, and she practiced with Draco. She hardly ever won, but Draco was very good. She was a good Quidditch player (she was Keeper), but had suffered a painful fall when one of the Quaffles hit her hard in the stomach. One of her right ribs broke, but she had suffered through forcibly.
All in all, spending time with Astoria was all right. She made him laugh, with stories of her apparently lunatic classmates, and comforted him when he was feeling down (usually because of Pansy, but Astoria didn't need to know the cause). Once when he had been feeling particularly dejected, she conjured him coffee and absolutely delectable cookies. She had placed a blanket over him and hugged him.
Pansy was across the hall in the girl's dormitory and she was reminiscing about a Christmas Ball that Narcissa hosted one year before she and Draco started school at Hogwarts. She and Draco had been 10 years old…
Pansy walked into the Malfoy Manor and nearly got run over by a swarm of house-elfs who were decorating the grand house. Narcissa lead Pansy and her mother over into the main ballroom, where the actual dancing and party would be taking place. In one corner a mammoth pine tree stood, although it's view was partly blocked by the barricade of elves charming the ornaments to levitate and place themselves on the branches. A section of the room had been roped off for the band coming in to play and a large, roaring fireplace on another wall. Around it sat multiple chairs. In one of them sat Draco. What's going on? Pansy asked silently. Her mother had grabbed her hand and abruptly brought them here.
"You and Draco are going to learn how to dance." Narcissia strode across the room to her husband who had appeared. "First: the waltz." Pansy clung to Draco for dear life as they tried desperately to mimic the movements of Narcissa and Lucius. It was clear both Pansy and Draco were having problems.
You could hear Draco muttering, "1,2,3,1,2,3,4? No, that's not right..." They couldn't get the timing or steps right.
While Draco struggled with the timing, Pansy strained with mastering the steps, "Left forward, side, close, right forward, back— oh oops!" Their lessons continued each day until the Ball. By the end of the lessons, they both had sore toes from the constant treading, and their arms ached from holding them aloft, but they could shakily get through a whole dance.
The day of the Ball, Pansy was awoken by her mother, who wanted to get Pansy a dress. She took her to a well-known dress shop where she was on friendly terms with the owner. The lady took her to the back where Pansy stood in front of a large mirror in just a slip.
"What color were you thinking of, Esterica?" The lady, who's name was Marge, asked. "I was thinking maybe red? White would offset her dark hair nicely. Or maybe royal blue?" After hours of modifying the dress, Pansy and her mum left the shop happy. Pansy was hoping to go home and rest a little, but as soon as she arrived home, another lady came to "beautify you, sweetheart". Pansy struggled impatiently.
His mother had outdone herself again- the guests were enthralled with the ornaments on the tree that rearranged themselves every half-hour, the food that arrived when demanded and most of all, the charmed band that played holiday music. Outside the grand ballroom were two trumpeters who announced every guest. Draco had been waiting to hear one name all day, and finally the call came.
"Introducing Miss Pansy Marie Querpinen Parkinson, daughter of Marcel and Esterica Parkinson." There she way, standing at the top of the grand staircase. To any other guest, she would have looked happy, excited even. But she had told me about her one nervous habit: twisting her hands in front, as if opening a nut of some sort. What could she be nervous about? Draco wondered.
She was clad in a gorgeous dress with a swooping skirt and a gathered layer rimmed with gold flower ruffles. It was of the deepest blood red color. She looks gorgeous, Draco thought. Ugh, crap. Since when do I say gorgeous?
Pansy and Draco were standing outside on one of the numerous balconies that hung over the sides of the Manor. Draco fingered a small jewelry box that his mother gave him earlier that day. "Use this well. Give it to the girl who holds your heart. But make no mistakes, for this kind of magic cannot be undone." Narcissia informed and warned him.
Back on the balcony he contemplated the pros and cons of giving it to Pansy. She made laugh, but also made him burning mad with rage. She was sweet when she wanted to be, but her outside demeanor was cool and aloof. The outside world saw Pansy as a princess, always getting what she wanted, however Draco knew that he was the only one who thought of her as gentle and often needing his company. Maybe she acted differently around him? They had fun together: playing on the Quidditch brooms that only flew about 3.5 meters in the air, sneaking into off-limits corridors in their Manors, playing in the meadow with meter high grass. But did she hold his heart? She made him happy. Making Draco happy was an accomplishment not many had succeeded at. Yes, she did hold his heart.
A/N: Sorry! I know this chapter is really short and kinda boring but it was essential. Next chapter I promise will have all the action. And I mean that. So if it takes me awhile to get it posted, I apologize. It'll be long. Hope you enjoyed!
xoxo