Ravenpaw's Café

Spottedleaf and Sandstorm

The brown dappled tortieshell she-cat tapped her small white paws impatiently on the small round table. Sandstorm was supposed to be here moons ago! Spottedleaf had only been waiting for a few minutes, but it felt like she had been waiting moons for Sandstorm to show up.

She took a sip of tea when she spotted the light ginger enter the store. The medicine cat waved her tail in greeting. Sandstorm nodded and padded over to the table. They had things to discuss.

"Hello, Spottedleaf," Sandstorm meowed curtly.

"Hello, Sandstorm," Spottedleaf forced a smile, secretly clenching her paws under the table.

Sandstorm pulled the chair out and took a seat. The two she-cats stared at each other for a moment. The other she-cat's presence caused them both to feel very, very, VERY awkward.

"Um, why don't I go get you something to drink?" Spottedleaf suggested, happy to walk away from the ginger for a moment. She rocked back and forth on her heels in line.

The two she-cats had decided to meet up in Ravenpaw's Café to discuss a few things. Mostly about Firestar. Spottedleaf looked back the warrior. She had taken out her cell and was texting someone. Probably Firestar.

The tortie growled and shuffled closer to the counter as the line moved along. She then noticed that Dovewing and Bumblestripe were holding paws in front of her.

"Dovewing," Spottedleaf tapped her shoulder. "Can you try to hear what Sandstorm is texting?"

"Are you crazy?" The white she-cat flicked her ears.

"It's a good crazy." She insisted.

"Fine." Dovewing growled at the persistant medicine cat. She pricked her ears toward Sandstorm. She listened to the sounds each button made as it was pressed. Each buton had a slightly different sound. "She's texting Firestar. She's saying 'Meet u at Red Robinwing 4 dinnr.'" Then Dovewing listened for more of the message, but Ravepaw yelled out "Brokentail!" causing her to flinch.

"Ugh, we come to talk about Firestar and she's texting Firestar!" Spottedleaf growled, not caring about Dovewing's damaged ears.

"They're mates, Spottedleaf." Dovewing said before turning around.

Spottedleaf mumbled insults about the star-holding-in-paws she-cat before digging in her pockets for mouse-tails. She was finally at the front of the line.

Ravenpaw wiggled his nose at the very-angry-scent Spottedleaf was giving off. "What can I do for ya today, Spottedleaf?"

"One thyme tea." She growled. She looked up at the menu again. Ravenpaw shuddered at the malicious smile that shadowed over Spottedleaf's face. "And one order of Darkstripe's 'Surprise'."

"That'll be three mouse-tails." Ravenpaw said as he punched out a reciept. "It'll only take a few minutes."

Spottedleaf handed them over happily. She dropped a few in the tip jar before returning to her table where Sandstorm had her dirty paws on top of.

"I ordered you some tea. He said it'll only be a moment." Spottedleaf meowed politely as she took her seat.

"Thanks." Sandstorm shrugged as she tucked her cell phone away. "So what is it."

"It's about Firestar." Spottedleaf said, crossing her arms.

"You know what, Spottedleaf?" The ginger slammed her paws on the table. Sandstorm proceeded to start yelling a slew of insults at the tortieshell.

Lionblaze and Cinderheart, who sat just fox length away from them, quickly covered their kits ears. "Grandmother!" Lionblaze pleaded. "Stop saying that in front of my kits."

Icecloud, who was working behind the counter with Ravenpaw, murmured something as she poured ice-tea from a machine for Dovewing. More and more cats stopped munching on prey and sipping drinks as the two she-cats yowled and argued.

"This is totes going on YouTail!" A RiverClan apprentice mewed with a raised camera.

"Forbidden and not-forbidden love triangle! This is going in my next book." A snickering cat in a fedora said.

Sandstorm opened her mouth real wide and slowly yelled a single insulting word. The whole café was silenced. Every cat froze. "You're a-"

"Jayfeather!" Ravenpaw called out, signaling the blind tom that his coffee was ready, and saving the other cats and the kits ears.

Suddenly, a firy ginger tom padded into the store with a gray tom by his side. Spottedleaf let Sandstorm yell obscanities at her as Firestar walked over to them slowly and confusedly. The other cats in the shop turned away and began whispering and murmuring, making Firestar and Graystripe more confused as Sandstorm looked at them nervously.

"Why did you call Spottedleaf such a fox-hearted name?" The red tom asked. He loved his wife, but was insulting his secret ex-girlfriend going to get them anywhere?

"She still loves you!" Sandstorm wailed, pointing a claw at the she-cat.

"Come on, let's go." Lionblaze muttered. He picked up his kits and left the store with Cinderheart. Firestar watched his kin leave and looked up to see Ravenpaw stadning over them.

"This is the last whisker!" Ravenpaw growled. He pointed his paw at his old friends. "Get out of my café please."

Spottedleaf drooped her tail, realizing she had paid for a drink and didn't get it yet. But Ravenpaw hussled them out of the café.

Graystripe slipped away from the three quarrelling cats. He just wanted something good to eat for StarClan's sake! He went over to the ordering counter, where the line was empty, and looked at the menu. Ravenpaw apologzed to the whole crowd of cats and went back to his place behind the counter. Graystripe put down the menu. "I'll have three of Moonflower's pies... Some of those revenge hot dogs or whatever... yeah, like five hot dogs... and an order of Russettfur Potatoes with extra cream."

"That'll be thirty-six mouse-tails." Ravenpaw chuckled as he wrote down his friend's big order.

"Thirty-six!" Graystripe handed over the money reluctantly. He glanced at the tip jar but didn't put a single mouse-tail in.

"What? No tip?"

"Well, I-"

"Get out of my café please."

Graystripe didn't even get a refund. He trudged out of the store empty-pawed and empty-bellied. The warrior suddenly wished he had read the sign on the door that said, "Rules: No fighting, no prejudice, and always tip your brewer."

He then heard angry yowling from the alley next to the store where BloodClan usually slept. Graystripe bounded away, scared that Scourge was lurking in the darkness.

But it was just Spottedleaf, Sandstorm, and Firestar.

Sigh...

Please give me suggestions for menu items. Honestly, those menu items are badger-stinky. I didn't put much thought into them.

Also, please suggest some cats and situations for Ravenpaw's Café!

I usually don't write like this and my humor is very, very... dry.