August 22nd 1912
Dinner with the colleagues. Murphy Sen. held a toast, said how Murphy, Murphy and Dobbins would not be the same without me. Must say it feels good to be appreciated for what I'm good at. Being a lawyer is what I'm good at, it's what I'm meant to be doing with my life, not idly sitting around a dreary old castle, waiting for some distant relative to snuff it so I can take over and cash in his money. Wish I had not drank quite so much over dinner. Bit queasy now. Nearly lost my temper with Dobbins there, when he got up and started ranting about how I must be careful not to become too much of a snob and an upstart in the future. Called me 'Little Lord Fauntleroy'! If that does not warrant a knock on the nose, I don't know what does. Lord, I'm not feeling well at all. Better go to bed. They're all just bloody jealous. As if I wanted any of this mess...
September 2nd 1912
Arrived this morning. And already I've made an ass of myself. Lady Mary Crawley, Cousin Mary that is, though I believe she addressed Mother when she offered it. Well, she came to our house, as some sort of reception committee, I suppose. How is one to receive such a person all unannounced and haughty with her riding gear and those dark eyes, how should one behave? Mother was the model of social grace and affability, while I stood there, flustered and sweating, looking like the greatest fool that ever crossed her path, I wager. She hates me now. Our arrival got me so riled up, with all that 'Yes, Sir' and 'Let me get that for you, Sir', from our very own butler or valet and double under house maids and whatnot. So I began to quarrel with Mother, nothing new, and told her that I'm not going to let them change me. And I am still adament about that. I mentioned the possibility that they may want me for one of their daughters, when that blasted butler or whatever he is comes back with her in tow! Of course she heard, and the way she glared at me when she left. As if I were a particularly nasty breed of vermin. I went after her to apologize, or rather to make a dumb excuse, I said it was only a joke. Up on her high horse, she looked down on me, literally, and said 'The whole thing is a complete joke.' Exactly what I've been saying this entire time, and yet, the moment she said it, I felt like disagreeing. Before I could say anything, she just took off. By God, this family is already making me lose my head. She is right, of course, it is a joke. Or rather, I'm a joke, the way I'm handling it so far. She told us to come down for dinner at the great house at 8. Better unpack now. Mother says this Molesley had already unpacked my trunks and laid out my suit. Seriously, do I look like a five-year-old?
September, 3rd 1912
Most awkward evening I have ever experienced. Last night, at the great house, I had made up my mind to be, well, open-minded. The house is incredibly grand, even worse than I'd expected. Beautiful obviously, but not really a place to live and get comfortable in. Can't imagine what life in such a palace would be like. No wonder Lady Mary has turned out so. Thought I was being extremely sociable tonight, to try and make up for that blunder in the morning. She, however, was not to be appeased. There was a veritable army of servants, who stood assembled like tin soldiers at our entrance. I'm sure they also think me insufficient to fill Lord Grantham's place one day. Never mind that, I'm not keen on having such an army of subordinates at my back and call. Molesley up here is trouble enough, looking at me as if I'd gone mad when he found me all dressed and my clothes hung up this morning. Then he tried to tie my shoelaces, I was so startled, I nearly kicked him in fright. The man must be five years my senior at least, how utterly ridiculous! I wonder at Mother, she's so enthusiastic about everything and now she wants to get involved at the local hospital, despite some snide comments from the Dowager Countess, who is quite a pistol, if I may say so. I myself lost my temper a little bit when one of the servants tried to lecture me. At the other end of the table, Lady M grinned over it like a Cheshire cat. So superior. They all believe they are. Scandalized faces all around when I told them about my new job. This family never had to work a single day in their lives, the Dowager doesn't even know what a weekend is. Must remember to write that to George, he'll never stop laughing. But if they expect me to become part of this wonderland they live in, I'm afraid they'll be sorely disappointed. Funny, even Harvell & Carter were surprised when I applied for the job, as if everyone expected me to put up my feet now that I'm here. Had not much to do today, basically just inspected my new office. It's a small partnership, no comparison to Murphy's at home, but I shall make the best of it and according to Harvell they never had anyone with such an extensive knowledge of industrial law, so I can surely be of some use here.