Saving What's Left
By: Liv=x-Lex4Ever & E. Scribbles
Ch. 2: Talk
It was evening before they returned to the hotel. There had been several doctors' appointments, and now Sophie was fast asleep in her sling, mouth hanging open a little, her dummy dangling from it.
Olivia had followed them everywhere, but Casey had barely spoken to her, only occasionally asking her to look after Sophie, and had only let her into Sophie's appointments, but not her own. Now she stood outside her own room, key in hand, and had no intention of letting Olivia in again.
"Casey..."
"Goodnight, Olivia."
Olivia sighed, slipping off her ring and putting it beside Sophie. "Bye," she turned, going into her room, hoping seeing the ring would, somehow, give Casey the jar she needed to make them talk.
It was over an hour before there was a gentle knock on Olivia's door a tear-stained Casey standing outside.
"Who is it?"
"...Me."
Olivia opened the door. "And what would you like, to hand me our child then slam the door in my face...again?"
Casey lowered her had, her tears starting again.
Olivia took her shoulder, guiding her inside. "I'm sorry, but after last night, can you blame me for being a bit bitter? Here," she handed her a few tissues.
Casey wiped her eyes, but just cried more, soaking the tissues.
As much as she wanted an explanation, she hated seeing Casey cry even more. Gently, she wrapped her arms around her, pulling her close.
She cried for a long time, releasing all the fear and anger she'd felt in the last few days, soaking the top of Olivia's shirt.
Gently she rubbed Casey's back, but stayed silent, holding her securely.
When she finally stopped, pushing herself back gently, she gave a quiet apology, motioning to Olivia's shirt, before motioning to the room next door. "I s-should get back.
"Wait, Case."
She wiped her face and finally looked up at her.
"Please, let me help. She—they're my kids too and...I miss you."
Tears sprung to Casey's eyes again, and after a few seconds, she muttered, "We were about to order dinner…if you want to."
Olivia wiped them away. "I would love to, sweetie," she stepped closer, hugging her. "I still love you guys, you know."
Casey stepped back, holding up her hands before hugging herself, then left the room, leaving the door to her own room open.
Olivia pulled a thick quilt out from the bottom of the bag. It was the quilt she would always wrap Casey in when she was sick or upset. When she was pregnant with Sophie, Olivia could've sworn it was another layer of skin. Then she walked out the door, closing that one and walking into theirs with the quilt around herself. "Hi."
More tears sprung to Casey's eyes when she saw the quilt, and she had to restrain herself from walking to Olivia and curling up with it, letting her hold her. Sophie looked up at Olivia before continuing her attempt at crawling as Casey pushed the room service menu into Olivia's hands.
Olivia sat in the chair again. "What are you getting?"
"I'm not very hungry." Casey continued to look at the quilt longingly.
Olivia opened her arms. "You can come sit with me."
Casey hesitated, then sat on the bed instead, looking at the other menu.
Olivia sat up, reaching for her. "Casey, you want us to be closer? You need to do something... Please?"
She rubbed her hands on the bed several times nervously before approaching her.
Olivia smiled, guiding her to sit in her lap, wrapping it around them. "This reminds me of when we first found out about Sophie. You'd been sick when I got home. I helped you to the couch, gave you a little water and a cloth for your head and you told me you'd been to see the doctor. We both fell asleep discussing baby names."
"Then the next five nights, when I felt exactly the same, I was alone."
Olivia held her close. "I'm sorry."
"And this time, when I found out, you didn't answer your phone. I even waited at the precinct for two hours and left you a note that you obviously never looked at."
She sighed. "I crashed in the crib...i-it must've been thrown away."
"Mm. What do you want? I should call." Casey went to stand.
Olivia pulled her back down. "In a...minute..."
Casey sighed and sat silently, stiffly.
"You don't want to be here?"
"...I love you, Olivia. You know I do. I'm just sick of your apologies. They don't mean anything anymore."
She nodded. "...I love you too. I want to...do more. Everyone needs me left, right and sideways, but you...should be the most important."
"Don't you think other people need me? You think my life just suddenly stopped when I MET YOU?"
She shook her head. "No, not completely, but maybe for a moment..."
Casey gave a gentle laugh. "Well, it didn't. I still have friends, I still have work, I still have family, I still have things I need to do, but I…for some apparently strange reason, thought that you and I were more important. You obviously thought differently. What do you want to order?"
"...I did, but until you I didn't have anyone else. No kids, no family like you do."
"Fine, ok. What do you want for dinner?"
"...Pasta. Or soup. Something really warm. And I'm glad I have you, really I am."
Casey stood, moving to the phone to call room service. Sophie pulled herself up onto her feet by Olivia's trousers, wobbling there for a moment, before falling to her bottom. "Oops!"
"Whoa! That's really good. Try again, come on." Her sad eyes met Casey's. She'd been there for all these firsts for Sophie and she...wasn't. For anything. She wasn't just Casey's kid. This next one wouldn't be hers either. The word theirs hurt to even think. Casey had been doing all of this by herself and she shouldn't have had to...ever. Tears began to prick at her eyes.
Instead of trying again, Sophie held up her hands to be help, waving them about for attention.
Casey looked away from Olivia, knowing if she saw Olivia cry, she'd instantly do anything she wanted.
Olivia sighed, picking up Sophie and giving her a teething ring.
Casey stayed silent after ordering dinner before walking over to them. She hesitated for a moment before dropping a kiss to Olivia's head.
Olivia smiled a small smile. "I've...missed so much and you shouldn't have to be a married single parent."
Casey bit back her reply, not wanting to rub salt in the wound. Instead, she sat silently on the arm of the chair.
Olivia's free hand rested on her arm. "Do you still have the box I gave you?"
"..It's where you put it."
Olivia placed it on her knee. "Open it."
Casey looked unsure. "Liv..."
"It's to...remind you of us...and the kids. I was going to take you out to dinner and give it to you. I'd...been saving up for it, but, being as I don't know when we'll get to dinner or if... Casey, just open it, please?"
Casey reached out and took it, looking at it for a moment before opening it.
Inside was a ring with a diamond, sapphire, emerald and a free slot. "It's our birthstones, Sophie's and...if we ever had another..."
"...It's beautiful, Liv."
"Just like you and our kids. Try it on."
She slid it onto her finger. "...It fits perfectly.
She smiled. "I'm glad. Casey, I know I'm away too much. I'd like to make up for it."
Casey sighed, lowering her head. "...Can you, though?"
"Can't you find it in your heart to let me try? I love you. I love our kids. You must know that."
"...I don't know." She stood to let room service in.
Olivia stood, laying a sleeping Sophie in her cot, then sitting back down. "You know, we could have that date right now...if you wanted to."
"…Why should I trust you, Olivia? You said after we got married, you'd be around more, you said after Sophie you'd be around more, you said if I got pregnant again you'd be around more..."
She sighed. "That's true, but until you up and walked out, I didn't know how much you meant to me. It sounds really bad, but it's true. You three are my only light through this dark world, but I just couldn't figure out how important the light was...until I lost it. You're right. I don't deserve anything after all the promises I've broken, but I'm asking...because I love you and if you didn't love me, you wouldn't be fighting so hard not to fall, hoping I'll catch you," Olivia stood behind her.
Casey closed her eyes, then said quietly. "..I'm not coming back to you. But I'll let you try."
Olivia nodded. "So, should we eat?"
Casey nodded, sitting at the small table.
Olivia brought the food over, sitting opposite of her as her phone, that was on the table, began to flash showing Elliot's name. She sighed, throwing it in the chair. "If he wants me, he can come find me."
Casey looked unconvinced, remembering, even on their honeymoon, Olivia claiming this, then finding her on the phone in the bathroom. Silently, she pulled food towards her and began playing with it.
Olivia sighed, going over and grabbing it before handing it to her. "You keep it until you want me to leave."
Casey looked up at her, giving a small smile, before taking the phone, then looked at Olivia's food. "…Can I try some of the soup?"
She nodded. "Can I try some of yours?"
Casey pushed it towards her, finishing the majority of Olivia's soup before pushing it back.
Author's Note: So, now what do you think will happen?
Review Thanks to: Kikilia14, deadlockQ, Kai, JeffHardyfan724, Bkwrmchar, Ren Victoria & tummer22
Please R & R!
Liv-x-Lex4Ever & E. Scribbles