Author's note: I do not own anything from Gintama. I'd really appreciate your reviews. Thank you very much for sticking by me. I really try my best to write despite my "busy" life.

Chapter 01 - A Spy of Some Sorts

Gin is on his side while lounging on the half-broken couch of his home. It is the most comfortable position that he can get to, given the state of his furniture and his willingness to expend some energy to adjust himself. He is also ignoring the woman standing by the couch as she traces lazy circles on his arm. She does not seem to mind being treated like a log.

He makes an exaggerated sigh to alert her to his irritation. She remains oblivious to it and merely continues to caress him. Sometimes he just lets her do whatever she wants as long as she gives him space to watch television. Honestly, he feels too lazy to shoo her away.

"Why are you here?" He mutters but it is pointless to ask anyway.

She perks up at his attention. "I was wondering if you were bored-"

"Shut up, I'm watching TV!"

"Well, you asked." She let out a long breath. "But I'll stop talking. Do you want a massage?"

Her offer tempts him and he considers it for a few minutes. "I might need one," he admits without sparing her a glance. "Just keep your hands away from my dick… and my butt… and my nipples." Gin can practically see her rolling her eyes at his words.

"When have I ever touched them?"

"I'm just drawing boundaries. You're known to be opportunistic." He turns on his stomach and awaits her massage.

She says nothing in return but her hands are already on his shoulders with the perfect pressure and position. How her fingers are able to ease away the tension and coldness of his muscles… Gin can't ever explain. The television seems blurred to him right now and that delicious spot on his lower back is reacting right now. He shuts his eyes to the lullaby of her touch on his body. This is not a bad idea at all.

"Gin-san?"

"WHAT?" Way to ruin the mood, Sacchan.

She coughs lightly. "Tsukuyo's in town."

He feels her palms let go of him as his muscles tense back. Gin is aware of the seconds that pass without a word. He sits up and turns to Sacchan. "So?"

"I just thought you'd be interested to know."

"Why the hell would I be?"

Shrugging and staring at the floor, she says evenly, "You always want to see her when she's around."

"Me?" He forces a laugh. It hurts his throat. "Of course not! She's too uptight and unfriendly. And she smokes all the time. Who'd be interested in that?"

"Well, you're always staring at her for one."

"She's got those weird marks on her face!"

"Don't you think she's pretty?" Sacchan starts to pick at something on the edge of the couch.

Pretty? That woman from the town of Yoshiwara who appeared a few months ago at Edo. She teaches some ancient dancing class every now and then at that building behind theirs. He's seen her a few times, a confident and graceful beauty who can handle paper fans and kunai with a good arm. She has good rhythm too, quite a mesmerizing one. He can consider her pretty, by adjusted standards, because while her face is certainly attractive, and her body is a bombshell waiting to be discovered, her friendliness factor is completely a negative ten.

"Well?" Sacchan prompts him out of his reverie.

"Nah. She's plain." He blurts that out too quickly.

Her lips turn up but her eyes are unmoving. "She might come to see you, you know."

That has his attention. He leans forward eagerly but catches himself and rests his back on the couch trying to appear nonchalant. "Why would she though?"

"I'm not sure. Catherine just mentioned it earlier."

He rubs his lips, deep in thought. "I wonder…"

"She's very popular… a dancer with tons of admirers. I heard that she's flooded with suitors." Sacchan rubs her temple. "But she's very much available, I think."

"Why are you telling me some gossip?" She is such a nosy woman really. "You shouldn't dig into other people's business unless they ask you to."

"I just thought you'd want to know."

Gin huffs. "Look, I'm not surprised. She's not the most inviting woman that one could meet. It's either she's glaring at you or her body language is just closed-"

A knock is heard from the door.

"That's probably her, Gin-san. You should hurry and see."

"Ah," he smooths his hair and clothes as he stands. "What could she possibly want?" He is amazed at how difficult he finds walking to be as he approaches the door. After a few breaths, he slides it open.

Vivid, purple eyes stare back at him.

He is taken aback at the sheer intensity of her presence. Her hair is down, one side pulled back by a hairpin, and her plain blue kimono is a stark contrast to her figure and pale features.

"Gintoki-san?" Her voice is firm and vulnerable at the same time.

He swallows the imaginary lump in his throat. "Ah, Tsukuyo-san, is it? Please come in." She is really here, he thinks.

She steps inside but pauses when she notices Sacchan who is sitting on the couch with her legs crossed.

"Ah, this is Sacchan, she was just leaving. Bye, Sacchan." Gin looks at the purple-haired pest and points her to the door. "Sit down please, Tsukuyo-san." He pulls Sacchan up and nudges her to the exit while guiding Tsukuyo in her place.

He lets out a thankful breath as Sacchan steps out of his home without a commotion.

"Girlfriend? Wife?" Tsukuyo asks.

Gin is horrified. "Not at all! She was just visiting."

"Fuck buddy?"

"WHAT?"

"Never mind." She shifts in her seat to face him. "You should sit down too, Gintoki-san."

"Okay." He sits beside her, a bit close but not too close like a creep. "What did you come here for?" His full attention is on her. Every single movement of her body has him aware. Why is he so intrigued by her? And why is she affecting him this way?

She looks him in the eye. "I heard from Otose and her feline companion that you work as a detective?"

"Err… Perhaps…"

Her eyes are glowing. "Then, you can help me, Gintoki-san?"

For a beauty like her, he would do anything. "With what?"

"You see… in a month, I am to be married." She takes his hand between her palms. "But have yet to meet the man who is to be my husband."

SHE WAS GOING TO BE MARRIED? TO WHICH BASTARD? His heart is bleeding. "Who is he? Shall I kill him?"

"What do you mean 'kill'? No! I need you to find out whatever you can about him… and report it to me." She is blushing and it is the reddest color he has ever witnessed in a woman's face.

"But… Why?"

"So that I can act accordingly when we meet." She takes out her kiseru. "Mind if I smoke?" She starts smoking before he answers. "I don't want to be a disappointment. I want to know everything about him."

"Can't you just date like normal people?" Everything seems so absurd and unnecessary. Plus, finding out that she was betrothed to some stranger is making him really uncomfortable.

"I don't really have much experience with men…"

"I kind of figured that out," he says under his breath.

"What was that, Gintoki-san?" Her nostrils are flaring.

"Yes, I'll find out what I can. For a price, of course." If he is inevitably going through this heartbreak, then he will at least make some money out of it. He names his price.

"Done," she replies in a heartbeat. "What else do you need?"

"His name."

She leaves after telling him that, with Gin still mournful from the recent revelations. That's life for him every single fucking time. A love story foiled even before it starts.

He shakes his head. "Must be getting old…" Since when does he care about women and their inability to recognize his worth? They all want rich men who dress impeccably and have stable jobs. He never was any of those. But at least he has his good looks and his good heart. Ha! He'll bet all his money that this Shige Shige Tokugawa, Tsukuyo-san's fiance, is a rich and ugly old man. He probably owns a country or something. Tsukuyo's reasons for choosing him is still a mystery to Gin.

He will start digging up information on Shige times two tomorrow. For tonight, actually it is only mid-afternoon, he will drown his sorrows in alcohol.

It's not a problem for him to find his fix since Otose's bar is simply downstairs. He barges in and ignores the owner's death glares while he orders and downs more than ten bottles of "whatever was cold" at that time. He is literally dragged out by Catherine after his thirteenth drink and he has no choice but to crawl up the steps to his residence.

It takes him half an hour to get inside and by the time he reaches his worn-out but ever-loyal couch, he is too drunk to function.

"But I don't even feel like puking, hahahaha!" He thinks he sounds like a madman but everything is just so floaty and numb right now. "She needs me, she says… to help her with her love life, hahahaha!" No, this is not pathetic at all. It's just a regular circumstance in my life, that's all.

Gin is able to pull himself up and sit on the couch. He attempts to recline but immediately sits back up because the room spins faster when he lies down. Even his drunken state refuses to cooperate with his predicament.

A slow movement to his left almost has him yelling himself into a heart attack. He is pathologically terrified of ghosts, didn't Sacchan know that? She shouldn't be appearing out of nowhere like that.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" He is almost sober again for a few seconds.

"Just checking on you. I knew you'd be upset."

"Upset? I ain't upset. I'm just…" He tries to find a word. What is he right now anyway?

"Just what?" She is kneeling in front of him, peering into his eyes.

He shuts his lids to discourage her and covers his face with his hands. "I have a headache. So, stop bothering me so I can sleep. Come back tomorrow if you insist on pestering me." He is mildly aware of his slurring speech.

"I'm here to help you, idiot. You're crazy drunk because of your hopeless crush on some woman." She scoffs. "I won't say you're pathetic if you finish this glass of water I brought you."

"Oh thank God," he takes the glass and empties it in seconds.

"Feel better?"

"No…" There is still three of her in his vision and his head is still filled with confused and desolate thoughts.

She puts her hand on his chest and pushes him to lie down. "Then go to sleep and maybe you'll be better in the morning."

He moves her arm away and takes a deep breath. "Do you know what she wanted me to do?"

Sacchan is suddenly silent and unmoving.

Gin continues anyway. "Some stupid spy work to get her information on this guy she's marrying… Shige Shige Tokugawa… stupid name."

"Shige Shige?"

"Ugh, don't repeat it. I don't want to hear that name again, especially not when I'm piss drunk." Fuck Shige Shige. Shitge.

"Shige Shige Tokugawa? The politician… in the higher ups? He's her fiance?"

Doesn't she have any consideration for his feelings? "Wait. Politician?"

"It might be a different one… but there's a man named as such, he's quite handsome…"

"Let me guess. Rich too?"

"Yes. He also has a reputation as a sex god." Sacchan stands up. "I'll try to find out more for you."

Sex god? What the fuck? He bursts out laughing. "What. A. Catch." He can't even think clearly. "I suddenly feel like a microbe or some low life form."

"Gin-san… Go to bed."

"Come to bed with me, Sacchan." He only says what comes to his mind at the moment. He is vulnerable… Too vulnerable… He just wants to feel better after all the shit that's happened today.

"Gin-san. You're drunk."

"Yes, and I'm miserable as fuck." He wobbles as he stands and walks to her. He isn't even sure of her exact position but he reaches her eventually. She is standing very still as he takes her hands and places them on his shoulders. "How about a massage… Hmm?"

"That's probably not a good idea," her voice is a bit higher-pitched than usual. "I don't want you to regret things in the morning."

"It's just a massage."

She ponders it silently and while she does that, Gin finds his hands moving to her hips, caressing and urging her to grant his request.

Her hands are now on top of his, like she attempted to stop him but she is hesitant to do anything. "You'll hate me in the morning," her voice is trembling.

"I won't. Come here," he pulls her forward but she turns away and they end up crushed to each other with her back against his chest. They are both taking rapid breaths and he feels her shaking in his arms. His lips graze her neck, then her hand shoots up to grab at his hair desperately. This makes him moan. "That's better." He wonders if his dizziness is still from the alcohol or now from her closeness.

"Wait," she protests but does not leave her position. Her fingers tug harder at his hair when he rubs his erection between the crack of her full bottom. "That's…"

"Good, right?" He tongues the crevices of her ear and sucks on the tip of her lobe. "Stay with me tonight," he whispers in her ear. He wants to release all the built up frustration inside him. His hand wanders to the underside of her breast and gives her a gentle squeeze. He can feel his cock throbbing with urgent need. But a sudden wave of dizziness hits him and he has to sit down.

"Are you okay, Gin-san?"

"I'm fine. But I really need to get fucked right now." He reaches for her to crush their hips together but she steps away from him. "Damn it. Isn't this what you've wanted since the beginning?"

"Not like this."

"Damn it, Sacchan. Can't you see how much I need you right now? Fuck. You're driving me insane." He unbuttons his pants and releases his erection. He grasps himself with his hand and starts to pump up and down. "I can tell by your earlier moans that you want it. What's stopping you?"

"You're drunk!" She snaps at him but she won't look away.

"Save us from this madness and come here, Sacchan." He groans as he pleasures himself. "This is your fault, too, for coming here and letting this happen. We both want this, don't we?"

Finally, she comes closer and kneels by him. He lets go of himself before she takes him into her mouth and starts sucking. Her palms are braced on his thighs as she makes up and down motions with her mouth and tongue.

Gin is officially in a frenzy. His drunkenness has escalated to extreme levels. Slowly, he starts thrusting his hips up and down while he holds her head to keep their rhythm in sync. He hears himself moaning, the blood rushing to his ears and his groin at the same time. Every fiber of his being is a ticking time bomb.

This woman with him tonight, she distracts him from his grievances. There is no past or future lurking in his mind right now. It is just her… in the present… her mere presence a pleasure to be with. Whimpers from her mouth are music to his ears, and the great curve of her hips an enticing view in contrast to her thin waist. He thinks of her soft lips on him, her eyes a light purple that meet his gaze, and simply the way she makes him want to explode right now.

He wants to cry out… For more… Her name on his lips…

"Tsukuyo."

Author's end note: The plot thickens? Or not yet. Haha… Dear readers, thank you! Marquise de Nile, mehr03, Guest, I hope I have an idea where this is going *cackles*. Damn, this chapter turned out longer than I expected. Eep.