A/N: This one was a little tough and I had intended to stay consistent and make it as long as the first chapter but I decided to just use the halfway mark as a stopping point. So the end may feel a little abrupt. It was taking a bit longer to write than I had anticipated and it was either give you a truncated chapter now or wait another week for the whole thing. I opted for the former, obviously. lol. I go into a little more detail of what happened to Ryan here but only leading up to the rape. I leave the details out once I hit that part. Also, I'm not a person who likes to do research so the legal aspects of this may be way off base. lol. I'm just pulling this stuff out of my ass so consider anything that doesn't quite jibe with the real world just my little AU justice system. lol
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Chapter Two
The smell of antiseptic and bleach invade Ryan's senses. He recognizes the smell and knows immediately where he is. He jumps at a touch on his arm. The hand pulls back but then returns gently patting his arm. He slowly opens his eyes to see a nurse smiling down at him, mouthing assurances that his fuzzy brain can't quite make out. It doesn't matter. He's happy to be anywhere but home. He closes his eyes again and relaxes into the stiff hospital sheets and tries not to think about why he's there.
Nurse Tomlin exits the room and approaches Dr. Paulson, who is speaking with the small group of people gathered there for Ryan.
"Excuse me, Doctor. You wanted me to let you know when Ryan woke up", she says as all eyes turn to her. "He came to just a moment ago".
A flurry of voices come at her, everyone talking at once asking if he was all right. She holds up a hand and smiles gently. "It was only for a moment. He appeared a little unfocused but he seemed to know where he was. He immediately drifted back off to sleep", she said to the doctor.
"All right. Thank you, Carla. If you'll excuse me, I'd like to check him over", Dr. Paulson says and then turns to leave.
Carson reaches out and stops him with a hand on his arm. "Could you make sure Ryan knows that we're here? Let him know he's not alone?"
"Of course", Dr. Paulson says with a smile, then makes his way to Ryan's room.
Carson lets out a breath as he turns to his son, who has returned to a chair in the waiting room along with Seth. "Luke?", Carson says questioningly, noting the down-turned expression on his face.
Luke looks up and says, "I was just trying to imagine.....you know, what it must be like for him. Waking up in a hospital. I mean, it's bad enough for anyone but he can't hear". He shakes his head. "When I had my appendix out last year I could at least hear people coming and going and would usually wake up when they came in to prod me. I just.....it must be weird for him".
Beside him, Seth softly agrees. "Yeah", is all he says but his thoughts go further. Thinking about how easy it would be for someone to sneak up on him. Wondering if Ryan had a chance to see them coming at him. Thinking about how scary it must've been if he didn't. Just having someone suddenly.....he shudders. He looks up at Mr. Ward and asks, "Do you think we'll be able to see him?"
"I hope so, Seth. The staff knows he doesn't have any family. I'm sure they'll take that into consideration. And if they don't, I'll make a diversion and you and Luke can make a break for it", he says with a tight smile and a wink, trying to lighten the mood.
Luke and Seth both give a small smile before Seth wonders aloud how his dad is coming along with the social worker. Right on cue, Sandy walks determinedly to where they're sitting. Seth sits up, "so?", he asks.
"I've laid some groundwork, but I need to get in to talk to Ryan and it's still going to come down to what can be proven. How much Dawn knew and what Ryan has to say", Sandy states. "He's been reluctant to talk in the past, according to his social worker".
"Why? Why would he keep quiet?", Seth wonders.
"It's complicated, Seth. There are a whole host of reasons that a child doesn't tell that they're being abused, psychological and otherwise. Sometimes they don't think anyone will believe them. Often the parent comes up with a convincing story when they're young, that's immediately accepted, no questions asked. The kids....they're taught not to tell any different. They don't feel they have a voice and, with Ryan being deaf, any real attempts at communicating with him may have been bypassed. ", Sandy tries to explain.
Seth nods and muses aloud, "No wonder he wanted to move out on his own as soon as possible".
Carson looks from Seth to Luke and asks, "Did Ryan ever talk to either of you about his home life?"
Luke shook his head. "Not to me. I mean, I used to offer to give him a ride home but he never went for it. He'd make excuses and he never talked about his family. I just figured he was embarrassed about where he lived after seeing our houses".
"Yeah, he didn't let much go about them. I just knew he wanted to get out of there and that his brother was arrested for stealing a car", Seth offered. "I did find out that he doesn't know sign language because his mom didn't want to learn....oh, and he said he hasn't always been deaf. He said that when he was six he, uh, had.......an accident.......", he trails off, the word suddenly taking on a new meaning. He glances at the others and sees that their thoughts seem to have taken a similar turn.
"Mr. Ward?", a voice comes from behind Carson.
He rises and extends a hand. "Detective Gibson. Uh, this is.....", he starts to introduce Sandy.
"Sandy Cohen. We've met a time or two", he says with a smile.
Sandy stands and also extends a hand. "Andy. I would say good to see you again but...."
Andy nods grimly. "Yeah. How is he? ", he inquires of Ryan's condition.
"The doctor is in with him now. We haven't been able to see him yet. A nurse said he woke up briefly", Carson says.
"Did she give a sense of how alert he was?", Andy asks.
"Said he seemed to know where he was before he drifted off again", Carson replies. "Have you found out anything?"
Andy sighs. "Dawn's sticking to her story. We're going to have to let her go soon. We have nothing to hold her on unless Ryan can tell me something I can use or we can prove she was there. We have an A.P.B. out on AJ. No sign of him yet at any of his usual haunts. I think he may have been tipped off that we're looking for him. I need to get a statement from Ryan", he says as he turns to Sandy. "I hate to do this to the kid but you know how it is. The sooner the better."
Sandy nods. "Do you know Ryan? You sound pretty familiar with the family", he asks.
Andy smiles sadly. "Yeah. I know the kid. Even had to run him in once, before I made the move up to detective". At Sandy's raised eyebrows he explains, "he didn't do anything wrong. Wrong place, wrong time. Hanging with the wrong crowd. One of which was his brother, who he was trying to talk out of doing something stupid. He's a good kid." He's quiet for a moment before he adds, "I took a few domestic disturbance calls." A dark shadow falls across his face. "My first call out to his house was an emergency call when Ryan "fell" off the porch. Hit the sidewalk below pretty hard. He was unconscious when we rolled up. He couldn't have been more than 6 or 7. I could see in his brother's eyes that there was more going on there but one look from his dad and he clammed up. I reported my suspicions but no one was talking".
"He said he lost his hearing when he was six. Could that have been the "accident" he was talking about?", Seth asks as he looks to his dad and Carson, a knot twisting in his stomach.
Andy nods and says, "It was. I checked up on him that night after my shift. At the time the doctor didn't know exactly why a head injury like that would affect his hearing or if it was permanent or not." He sighs and rubs a hand across his chin. "I wish I could have done more for him over the years. The one time someone actually stepped up and admitted that they witnessed any abuse he and Trey were both removed from the house but the next thing I knew they were back home. Their dad got arrested a few years ago for armed robbery. I thought maybe with his old man out of the picture things would be better but then Dawn just started bringing home men like AJ. The yelling and the fighting was constant and people just got used to it. They stopped calling."
"Yeah, well, he's not going back to that house if I can help it", Carson states firmly.
Sandy informs him of Carson's intent on having Ryan live with him and that he is already unofficially working on Ryan's behalf until he can get in to see Ryan to get his ok that he represent him. After a beat he says, "That's good to hear, Sandy. He couldn't have a better lawyer in his corner". He tips his head toward the hall and says, "Ok, then, I'd better go see if the doc gives the green light for me to talk to him". Giving them all one last look he turns with a smile on his face. It's about time the kid's got some decent folk in his corner.
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Detective Gibson enters Ryan's room and winces at the bruising on his face. The kid's eyes are closed so he gently taps Ryan's hand as he approaches the bed. As expected, Ryan recoils and panicked eyes fly open. Andy remains still, waiting for Ryan to process and he gives a soft smile as Ryan blinks a couple of times and relaxes at a familiar face. "Hey", he says as he pulls a chair up. Dispensing with any pleasantries, he decides to get to the crux of the matter. "I think you can guess why I'm here." Ryan holds his gaze briefly before his shame filled eyes skitter away.
Andy reaches out slowly and tips his face back up, ignoring the slight flinch at the touch. "You've got nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing", he says pointedly. When Ryan finally nods he asks, "Can you tell me who hurt you?" He frowns at the shake of Ryan's head. He had hoped that this violation would force Ryan from his old habits. "Look, Ryan, if AJ....." He stops as Ryan starts vigorously shaking his head. "It wasn't AJ?", he asks as he attempts to understand.
Ryan starts to shake his head again but stops and sighs, frowning in frustration.
Andy holds up a finger and reaches down. He knew that communication with Ryan would be difficult so he'd brought his laptop. He pulls it out of his bag and sets it on the bed tray and turns it on, opening a document page. "Can you tell me what happened, Ryan?", he asks as he slides the tray closer. Ryan shifts uncomfortably but eventually straightens in the bed and nods.
They take it slow, with Detective Gibson typing out questions and letting Ryan answer, occasionally cutting in to clarify his answers.
"Do you know the person who assaulted you?"
I never saw him before that night. I don't know his name.
"Were AJ and your mother there when it happened?"
Ryan reads the question and his shaking hands hover above the keyboard. He turns his eyes to Detective Gibson and his lips part.
"Yes."
It echoes through the room and in Andy's head. He hadn't heard Ryan speak since he was about eight years old. He had been in his patrol car driving down a run down street full of abandoned buildings and vacant warehouses. Ryan had run out into the street and waved him down. He rolled down the window and Ryan was frantically asking him to help him. He had tried to ask what was wrong but all Ryan would say was, "Trey! You have to help!" as he tried to pull open his door and get him to come with him. They had been goofing around exploring the empty buildings. Trey breaking a few windows. They then had tried to climb a fire escape on the side of one of the buildings to get to the roof. Trey had convinced Ryan that it would be easy. All they had to do was climb the lower ladder part and then it was all stairs until the last twenty feet or so, which was another ladder that led up to the roof and he'd told Ryan that he'd let him go first so that he could make sure he didn't lose his footing. They'd made it near the top when the old rusted ladder broke away from the building. It hadn't completely come loose but the sudden start and stop of the movement was enough to cause Trey to lose his grip and he fell to the landing about twenty five feet below. Ryan had been scared going up so his grip was tight and he had managed to hold on. He had clung to the ladder with his eyes clenched shut and when he was sure the ladder wasn't going to move anymore he slowly opened his eyes. He looked down and was horrified to see Trey down below, clearly in pain. He slowed his breathing and then carefully climbed down to him. Trey hadn't been seriously injured but had dislocated his shoulder and broken an ankle in the fall. Unable to get Trey down, Ryan had to climb all the way down by himself and go for help.
He's pulled from his thoughts as Ryan turns his attention back to the screen in front of him and types out his answer again and they continue getting Ryan's statement down.
"Can you start from the beginning and tell me as much as you can remember?"
I'd just gotten home from having dinner with the Cohens.
"Do you remember approximately what time it was?"
8:30 maybe? AJ sent me back out for cigarettes. The guy wasn't there then but he was when I got back. He creeped me out.
"Creeped you out how?"
Just the way he looked at me. I went right to my room. I stayed in there mostly. I don't like to be out there when.......
Ryan hesitates, not knowing just how much to tell.
"It'll help if you can tell me everything you remember, Ryan."
They were doing drugs. I don't like to be around that, so I stayed in my room. I came out once to use the bathroom and the guy was still there.
"Do you know how much time had passed?"
About an hour I guess. They were smoking some weed. The room was full of smoke and I could smell it. I went right back to my room. I must've fallen asleep. I don't know how long but next thing I know I'm being pulled out of my bed. He had my arms pulled behind me and a hand over my mouth. He started dragging me down the hall and I bit his hand. Then I called out for my mom...
"But she....she didn't come", he says aloud, voice catching. Ryan pauses, trying to fight back the emotion welling up inside of him.
Detective Gibson silently curses Dawn Atwood as Ryan can't stop the tears from coming. He watches as Ryan angrily wipes them away and sucks in a shaky breath and begins typing again.
She didn't come. Then AJ was there. He hit me a couple of times and then helped get me to the basement. He grabbed my face and said....
He meets Andy's eyes. Andy nods, encouraging him to continue as he pats his leg. He takes another breath, working up his courage and continues. Determined to get through this.
He said the guy paid for an hour and he was going to get it. I didn't understand but then I looked at the guy and I knew. I freaked and tried to get out. I made it to the stairs but AJ was on me again. He hit me a few more times and I think he would have kept going but the guy stopped him. He said something to AJ and then AJ left.
"Could you make out any of what the guy said?"
Another pause. Ryan's stomach churns as he swallows down the nausea building.
only the last part. He said he wanted me awake.
Andy closes his eyes briefly but keeps his gameface on.
"You're doing great, Ryan. I know this is hard but we're almost done. I need you to tell me what happened next. Can you do that for me?"
Ryan nods and seems to disconnect himself from it as he solemnly types non stop until he's finished. Andy reads it over and praises him for being so brave and looks him in the eye as he tells him again that he has nothing to be ashamed of. He steps out to ask a nurse if there is somewhere he can take his memory card or laptop and print off a copy of the statement and when he returns he has Ryan look over it once more and sign it. Before leaving, he informs Ryan that Carson, Sandy, Luke and Seth are out in the waiting room and asks if he'd like to see anyone. Ryan looks uncertain and Andy tells him that they just want to see if he's all right. When Ryan gives no indication, he says to Ryan that he should at least speak to Sandy, as he has something important to discuss with him. At Ryan's furrowed brow, he smiles softly and says, "It's good news, Ryan. At least, I think it is. He and Carson, they want to help you. Will you let them? Can I send him in?"
Ryan bites his lip and them winces, forgetting that part of it is split open from AJ. After a beat he finally nods in agreement.
Andy leaves and as soon as he steps back out into the hall he walks determinedly to the waiting room. They all look up when he enters. Carson is the first to him. "Is he all right?", he asks.
"He's....he's coping as best he can", he replies.
Sandy asks, "Did he tell you what happened?"
Andy's face hardens. "Yes. He told me everything. It....it's....", he trails off not bothering to finish and then shakes his head and runs a hand down his face. "I need to get back to the station and arrange for a sketch artist to come work with Ryan in case I can't get Dawn to talk."
"It wasn't AJ?"..."So Dawn was there?", Sandy and Carson simultaneously ask.
Andy shakes his head to Sandy's question but then amends. "AJ's not the one that did the sexual assault but he played a part. He inflicted a fair share of the damage." To Carson, he says, "Yes. Dawn was there. I really can't tell you any more than that. I'm sorry....Sandy, I told him you wanted to speak to him and he agreed. If he accepts you as a representative then you might have access to this statement, and Carson, if you are allowed to foster him the social worker might deem it necessary that you know what you're going to be up against but until then...."
Sandy waves a hand cutting him off. "We understand", he says as Carson nods in agreement.
"All right then. I'm going to head back. I have a few more questions for Dawn Atwood", he says, a hard edge to his voice.
Sandy turns to Seth and Luke, who have been silently listening to the back and forth. "I'll see if he's up to seeing you."
"Thanks Mr. Cohen", Luke says. "Tell him we won't stay long. We just....."
"Yeah, we just want to......", Seth adds as they both try to explain what neither of them really know they're trying to say.
Sandy smiles gently. "I'll tell him."
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Ryan sees movement out of the corner of his eye and he turns to see Mr. Cohen enter his room He straightens in the bed as Sandy offers a small smile. "How are you doing, kid?". He shakes his head. "Stupid question. Nevermind."
Ryan just shrugs his shoulders.
He studies Ryan for a second. The kid is clearly exhausted. He's got two black eyes from his broken nose. Dr. Paulson had covered his injuries with him and Carson despite the normal "family only" rule. A broken nose, some bruised ribs and some tearing from the sexual assault among the most serious. He suppresses a shudder at the thought of that last one. He's taken aback at how young and lost he looks. He is young. The same age as Seth. He shakes himself from his train of thought, realizing that Ryan is waiting for him to speak. "Ok, look, I won't bother with the small talk, kid. What would you think about staying with the Wards when you get out of here?", he asks. He watches as surprise and confusion flash across Ryan's face.
"Why?", Ryan asks, too emotionally and physically spent to seek other ways of communication.
Sandy hides his shock at the unexpected sound of Ryan's voice. "Carson called me and asked me to help try to arrange for you to live with them. They want to help you. I want to help you. If you'll let me."
Ryan studies his face but says nothing. He's been down this road before. People always have good intentions to start with but things never work out.
"I'd like to represent you. To speak on your behalf, legally, in case they try to give you back to her. You don't want to go back to your mother do you?"
"No!", the word comes quickly and panicked.
"All right, then. Do I have your permission to be your legal representation?", he asks.
Ryan frowns and says, "No money".
"I'm not worried about the money but we'll work something out if you want."
Ryan nods but Sandy can still see the uncertainty in his eyes. "Ryan, I won't lie to you. I've spoken to your social worker and there are a few favors I won't be afraid to call in. I think she's very open to the idea but as I'm sure you know, the system makes bad decisions sometimes".
Ryan rolls his eyes and nods in acknowledgment. He knows that all too well.
"Just know that I'll do my best to keep you safe", Sandy says holding Ryan's gaze to drive the point home. He then says, "Luke and Seth, are outside. I know you're tired, kid, but it would mean a lot to them if they could see for themselves that you're all right. Carson, too."
Ryan nods his agreement and Sandy gives him a wink and tells him to hang in there as he leaves the room. A few seconds later the door opens again. Ryan watches as shock briefly flashes in Seth's eyes at the sight of him but he quickly masks it. His eyes shift to Luke and his dad and he sees relief flash in theirs. Luke and Seth approach the bed and each tap fists with Ryan.
Carson hangs back and lets the boys have a moment. Ryan still looks rough but it's better than the dried blood all over his face from the cut above his eye and other injuries. He flashes back to the sight of Ryan on the floor with pools of blood beneath him, from his broken nose and split lip.
"I'm glad you're...uh, I was gonna say ok but that probably wouldn't be right and I can't say that I'm glad you're not ok because that would be stupid and I....", Seth rambles until Luke punches him in the arm. "Ow", he mumbles.
"Just shut up, dude. Shit, man", Luke says, annoyed.
"Well, at least I'm not standing there with my mouth hanging open like an idiot", Seth shoots back.
"No, your mouth has words coming out of it, proving you are an idiot", Luke replies.
Ryan's eyes follow the back and forth like a tennis match with an amused smile breaking out on his face. He relaxes into the bed, shaking his head.
Carson clears his throat and says, "Boys".
They both turn to him and then look at Ryan, who has a smirk on his face. They both offer apologies and Ryan waves his hand dismissively and says, "It's ok".
Both Luke and Seth's eyebrows raise in shock and Ryan laughs out loud.
"Look, man, we just wanted to make sure you were gonna be ok and, uh, let you know that we'll be around", Luke says after he absorbs the fact that Ryan just spoke out loud.
"Yeah, we'll be back tomorrow. You want us to bring anything?", Seth asks, thinking to himself that Ryan doesn't sound that different than other people. He shouldn't be embarrassed and he wonders how much of the difference he's hearing is due to the broken nose.
Ryan shakes his head. "No. Thanks, though".
"All right, man. We'll see you later", Luke says and they all tap fists again.
Ryan gives a sigh of relief as they go and Carson approaches. He sits on the edge of the hospital bed and asks, "how are you?"
Ryan doesn't answer. Instead asking, "you really want me to live with you?".
"Yes", Carson says simply.
"You're sure?", Ryan asks.
Carson smiles and says, "We'd love to have you live with us. The twins could use some more soccer tips". He watches as Ryan smiles and looks down at his hands. He taps Ryan's hand and waits for him to look up. "Hey, I know it's a lot to ask right now but....trust us?"
Ryan studies his face and can see that the man understands what he's asking. He's had a lot of people let him down in his life but, God help him, he does trust these people.
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For once in Ryan's life things seem to be working out. AJ and Dawn had placed blame on each other when each was presented with the case against them. AJ, not wanting to go down alone, had claimed that it was Dawn's idea to trade Ryan for the drugs and named Ryan's attacker. The case against Dawn was shaky. She had changed her story to say that while she was indeed in the house when it happened she was high and didn't know what was going on. she claimed that she lied because she didn't want to admit to the drug use. Ryan was unable to argue the fact. He just remembered seeing her there in the living room when AJ and Mickey had forced him into the basement but he couldn't attest to her state of mind. Detective Gibson offered her a deal. She would still be charged with neglect but if she signed over her parental rights she would not be charged as an accessory to the rape of her son. They hadn't wanted Ryan to have to testify and AJ and Mickey had already copped guilty pleas.
Things moved quickly after that. Ryan was released from the hospital and the Ward's were approved as foster parents. Mickey had tested negative for the HIV virus, which was a huge relief to everyone. Carson and Meredith arranged for Ryan to see a therapist. He hadn't been too happy with the idea but he liked the one they found for him and it did seem to help being able to talk about it to someone who didn't expect anything of him.
With each day that went by Ryan was beginning to settle more and more into his new life. Living with the Wards was such a change but a welcome one. They had arranged with Jake that Ryan could keep the job at The Crab Shack in the summers but when school started he was to focus on that. He felt funny about taking money from them after all they'd done for him but he could live with that. He was due to start school with Luke and Seth in a few weeks. Dr. Kim had been concerned about him being able to keep up with the curriculum but he'd passed the entrance exam easily and his teachers in Chino had given him glowing reports. The only time his grades had suffered was when he missed a lot of school but with his being out of Dawn's care Carson had assured her that that would no longer be a problem. Ryan was a little nervous about fitting in. Some of the kids knew him from The Crab Shack but he was worried about people finding out how and why he was living with the Wards but he'd cross that bridge when he came to it.
For now, he wasn't going to worry. The Cohens had invited them over to dinner. Sandy was grilling. As Ryan sat by the pool watching Luke and Seth and their endless bickering he couldn't hold back the smile. He didn't think those two would ever really get along that well but he appreciated the fact that they consistently tried to put aside their differences for him. He turned his attention to Carson and Sandy who were, apparently, discussing proper grilling technique while Kirsten and Meredith were gossiping in the kitchen, and the twins were, oddly enough, trying to teach Caleb some tricks with the soccer ball. He shakes his head at the surreal scene, feeling he has finally turned a corner and left the Atwood Curse behind.
to be continued...