"She's back." Those words circled in my head over and over again. The day I had been waiting for, for five freaking years was finally here. But why did I feel so empty. I remember those nights when I would cry myself to sleep, calling out her name praying to god she heard and came back. Now there was a strong possibility she was finally here and I didn't feel any different. "Have you seen her?" my voice sounded hoarse even to my own ears, Taylor shook her head. "But there's a car parked in front of her parents' house, and that hasn't been the case for five years." I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding, "well until I see her I don't believe." Taylor nods sympathetically, "I understand." It was quiet for a few moments, Taylor breaks the silence. "You gonna let me in or what?" I smile softly and open the door wider, "I'm about to go to work, so…" she waves me off, "that's cool your fridge is always stocked, I'll be fine." I chuckled. That is one of the reasons Taylor and I are so close, she makes smile when I don't think I can.
After getting on uniform which consisted of black slacks and a red polo, I was on my way. Phil's Diner was my first real job. I started working there a little before Demi lost her parents. After that it wasn't so much of a job anymore, it was a way of coping. Phil the owner, was cool about it. He gave me the days off I needed, he was someone I could talk to, and most importantly he understood. He did more for me then my parents could do. Not that my folks weren't there, they just coddled me. Phil would tell me to, 'get my shit together.' That's what I needed. And to him I am forever grateful.
When I step in to the diner it was packed. Lunch rush. 'Selena, you're late.' Paul calls out from in the kitchen as soon as he spots me. 'Hello to you to.' He chuckles, 'get to work before I fire you." I laugh wholeheartedly, 'That was a good one Phil keep it up.' I grab an order pad from beside the register and glance around. There was a woman sitting by herself in the back. Her back was to me. I approached her with a cheery smile on my face. 'Good Afternoon and Welcome to Phil's, my name's Selena and I will be your server. Can I start you off with a drink?' I poise my pen ready to take down her order, 'Selena.' The smile falls from my face immediately. Her voice was raspier but there was no doubt in my mind that it was her. I was afraid to look up. After all these years of waiting and hoping, here she was and I couldn't even look at her. 'Selena, it's me…Please.' At that single word my resolve is broken and I look up. My eyes meet a pair of hazel ones. Tears spring to my eyes. 'Can I start you off with a drink?' I repeat, she looks as if I'd slapped her clean across the face. 'Selena, don't do this.' I think about slapping her when she says that. 'Don't do what? Leave your best friend without a word of goodbye, or stay away for five years without a fucking phone call?' Demi shakes her head, 'That's not fair I couldn't call, and you know I needed help.' I look away as a tear escapes, 'Don't you dare pull that fucking card, you think I was okay. I had to deal with your bullshit after everything, and you still treated me like shit, you left me.' I feel drained after this short conversation, she wasn't there for me and I don't need her now, I swipe at the tears left on my face and put on a mask. 'Look I have to get back to work, so do you need anything.' She sighs, 'Some coffee.' I nod and leave her table to find Phil. He would know what to do, he always does.
I find him in his office sifting through mail. He sees me and I immediately break down. He pulls me towards him and in engulfs my tiny frame into a hug. 'She's out there.' I let out through choked sobs. His grip gets tighter. 'Its okay baby girl, you're okay.' I sob louder because no, I'm not okay.