Disclaimer: Sorachi owns Gintama's ass
NOTE ON THE TEXT: (*) means end of flashback.
How Fools Fall In Love
Chapter 2: Where There's Smoke There's Fire
Mitsuba returned to her apartment to find a thoughtful Hijikata sat listless in her sofa. His usual bright blue eyes were cloudy and fixated on a spot above the TV in deep meditation. He had a cigarette in his mouth but it was unlit. She called him a few times but only met a kind of unresponsiveness not wont in him. Hijikata was always excessively attentive and eager to please her whenever he could. It was wondrous to see him upset for a change but at the same time preoccupying. Mitsuba could not hide a smile of amusement, yet she began to feel responsible for the abrupt quarrel between the two men. When she finally got through to Hijikata, his shoulders jerked and he turned to her as if he had taken a blow.
"Toshiro-san, I've already called you four times, is everything alright?" she asked worried "I've been apologizing to Gin-san in your stead. He has been so kind to me, I felt it was my duty to introduce you, but I had no idea you two knew each other. You never told me." her feelings of distress were too weak to last against Hijikata and they quickly gave way to a curiosity which Gintoki had barely quenched.
"I'm sorry about that." Hijikata replied somberly. He got up and walked towards her.
"Gin-san told me you two were roommates once. Did you not part friends?" Mitsuba asked him. Hijikata walked past her in the direction of the front door with a look of annoyance on his face.
"We were never really friends," he muttered as he put on his shoes "We just kind of tolerated each other"
Mitsuba perceived how carefully he had chosen those words and sighed.
"That's unfortunate," she said "He's such a nice man, helps me out with Sou-chan when I'm stuck at work and he never complains about my spicy food, but Toshiro-san are you leaving so soon? I was going to brew some tea."
"Yes, I wouldn't be much company after this anyway." he lamented.
"Well, then give Kondo-san my regards and call me as soon as you have any news."
Hijikata answered her with a nod and a short smile.
"Goodbye." Mitsuba leaned against the front door and watched him walk down the hallway until he disappeared behind a corner.
"He's already gone, you look silly standing there aneue." came Sougo's taunting voice.
"I was just making sure he knew the way," she replied quickly, closing the door and sneaking into the kitchen to hide a soft blush "Have you done your homework Sou-chan?"
Hijikata's forgotten lighter on the counter made her miss Sougo's reply.
10 YEARS AGO
Hijikata looked at the shabby building with a sense of foreboding. Nothing seemed to recommend it from the outside. The fact it hadn't collapsed after who knows how many years was perhaps the only comforting thought about it. Beside him Kondo's radiant grin was impervious to his total disappointment. Hijikata tried to remember again why he had agreed to the arrangement, but his brain shut down that whole operation before he died of regret right then and there.
"So this is it Toshi! How do you feel?" Kondo asked him excited.
"Terribly-fortunate." Hijikata replied between gritted teeth.
"Yeah right?!" Kondo gave a loud laugh and dragged him over to the side of the building.
"Where are you taking me?"
"The front door is busted, we use the back one now."
Hijikata opened his mouth to protest but nothing came out except disbelief. He followed Kondo and they snaked their way around the dorm through a cobbled path barely visible amidst a swarm of weeds. They grew up the walls and threaded their way up the two-story building, twisting around old rusty pipes and ledges. It seemed that no matter where he looked, Hijikata was bound to find signs of negligence and decay. Being the epitome of discipline and order himself, there was no way he was ever going to adjust to the place. Nevertheless, it was only after seeing the interior that Hijikata started valuing the degradation outside. The squeaking wooden floor, the moldy walls concealed by stacks of books, comics and non-descriptive trash littering the floor sent shivers down his spine. Clearly no humans lived there, only animals.
"So downstairs we have the kitchen, bathroom..." Kondo showed him around as they walked down the cluttered hallway. Hijikata refrained from giving the rooms more than a superficial glance before he decided to turn back and send it all to hell.
"Here is the living room, oh! Yamazaki!" a familiar face appeared by the kotatsu as soon as Kondo opened the door "Look who I just brought back from the sticks!"
Yamazaki leaned to peek behind Kondo and gasped with surprise.
"Hijikata-san! Long time no see!" he got up to greet him and it took all of Hijikata's tenderest sensibilities not to punch the bastard. The need to blame the dormitory's total disorder on someone was crawling under his skin.
"Yamazaki has the room next door." Kondo said with a pat on the younger man's back.
"Yes! It's a 3 tatami room and it has a window to the backyard!" Yamazaki said proudly. Hijikata failed to comprehend the joy behind that statement. The description sounded dismal, especially for someone who had just been acquainted with what Yamazaki called 'the backyard'. Hijikata began to wonder if Kondo's entire dorm business was more a misfortune than a blessing.
"You're getting Danna's room, right?"
Hijikata looked at Yamazaki confused, noting a clear a lack of information on his part. He turned to Kondo anxiously, his eyes demanding an answer.
"Yeah, yeah we're getting there Yamazaki. Don't spoil the fun," Kondo replied with a fake laugh "See ya later!"
"Yes, sir!"
They rushed out of the room and Hijikata missed Yamazaki blinking an eye back at Kondo.
"Yamazaki goes to the dojo too?"
"Yeah, he helps me out with the kids and covers for me when I go on dates with Otae-san. Hahahahahaaha!"
Hijikata had known Kondo for far too long not to notice the subtle delusional tone in his voice. He shook his head with skepticism and walked on, deciding it was too soon to shatter the man's dreams. Even in their youth back in Kyoto Kondo's romantic fantasies rarely became more than that, fantasies.
There were two more rooms downstairs: Kondo's own stalker nest and a tightly shut room which read Zura on the door. Its frame was covered with tape and someone had crossed out the name Katsura on the top making it look all the more suspicious.
"Okay, now on to your room!" Kondo announced happily. Hijikata might have shared part of the man's enthusiasm if the sentiment didn't stem mostly out of frustration and weariness. His arms were half-numb from carrying his luggage and his legs ached from long hours sitting on the train.
The top floor had a much smaller hallway than the lower one, with only two rooms on the left and another on the right. According to Kondo, the first on the left belonged to some guy called Sakamoto, who nobody ever saw, and the second to a creeper named Hattori Zenzou whose hemorrhoid problems seemed to fascinate Kondo to no end. Hijikata was forced to call him out on his babbling so they might carry on.
"Kondo-san. My room now please." Hijikata said dryly, glancing towards the door on their right. Kondo started out of his musings and proceeded with an apologetic look.
"Oh, yeah, right, right, Yorozuya's room...Biggest room in the house, six tatamis!" he announced merrily, opening the door and striking a pose.
Hijikata stepped inside at once, his impatience getting the best of him, along with his surprise. It took him only a second before he wished he had stayed back home in the middle of nowhere. To this utter dismay, a body was laying not two feet away from him, ungracefully spread out on a futon. An open issue of Jump rested over the guy's face and a carton of strawberry milk was toppled over his futon, its contents staining the covers.
"Oi, oi, Mr. Real Estate Agent, who the fuck is this and why does he come with the room!?" Hijikata inquired in a panic.
"Yorozuya, your roommate."
"What?"
"I told you I could fit you in," Kondo beamed, satisfied with a job well done "His previous roommate took off a few weeks ago, he ain't coming back don't worry."
"That not what I'm worried about!"
"It's okay, Yorozuya's an idiot but he's a nice guy. Oi Gintoki, you awake?"
The man slumped on the floor grunted something unintelligible and waved his hand to shoo them away.
"You'll be fine Toshi. Besides, you're both piss poor. This way both of you will be fine with the rent and make friends, right?" Kondo winked an eye at Hijikata and gave him a thumbs up "I have to go to the dojo now for the rookies' practice. I'll be back later and we'll have drinks. You just rest from the trip now, Toshi."
"No Kondo-san wait-!" Hijikata ran after him but Kondo shut the door so quickly he almost collided face first with it.
"Otae-san and me, sitting on a tree, in the Shimura dojo glee~" the airhead sung as he walked down the stairs.
"Fuck! I'm gonna kill him!" Hijikata kicked the door in an attempt to sooth his rage but it was useless. He was just too fucking angry. He threw his suitcase and bag to the opposite wall, demolishing a pile of old magazines that stood in the way.
"Oi Toshi, could you tone it down? Gin-san is trying to sleep here." the man on the floor uttered out sluggishly.
"Fuck this."
Hijikata called it quits. He took a couple of cigarette packs out of his bag and stormed off to smoke them to exhaustion, maybe even a coma. One after another, he burned them all crouched in a secluded corner of the backyard. Surrounded by tall weeds, he almost felt like he had never left home; the vision of the grass fields around his brother's house still fresh in his memory. However, the notion was too wretched to even conceive and Hijikata laughed at it, almost choking himself to death.
He was on his second pack when the thought occurred to him that it was probably in his health's best interest to stop smoking and go look for other means to vent his anger. Unpacking was the first idea that came to mind but he soon regretted it. When he returned to his room the strange man was no longer feigning sleep on the floor. Instead he was rummaging through Hijikata's bags with an air of mild discontentment. Hijikata stood paralyzed in the doorway for half a minute, his brain slowly catching up with the perplexing sight.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" he blared, snatching a pair of boxers from the stranger's hands.
"Are you gonna use those? I have a huge stain on my futon, I was looking for something to scrub it off." the other man answered shamelessly, as if boxers were a universally acknowledged cleaning product.
"And you came searching my stuff? Are you stupid?! What gave you the right?!"
"This is my room, oi! I thought this was my old bag."
"Not your old bag! Not your room anymore!"
The other man furrowed a brow at his reply. A scowl took over his features and he gave Hijikata a once-over.
"Wait a minute" he said "Who the hell are you again?"
"That's what I want to ask you! This was supposed to be my room!"
"No, no no no. This room right here," the man tapped the tatami mat with his hand "this shitty room is definitely Gin-san's"
"Who the fuck is that?"
"Me."
Hijikata sighed profoundly. He was starting to get an headache from all the stupidity and he was not sure trying to verbalize his situation would get him anywhere with the idiot.
"Listen, Kondo-san got me this room and I-"
"The gorilla did?"
"Yeah, he-! What the fuck did you just call him?!"
"Nothing, go on."
Hijikata's grip on the boxers tightened.
"I was saying, Kondo-san told me this was my room and you my roommate," Hijikata said in plain words, making an effort to come to terms with his own statement "Therefore this is no longer your room, it's our room. You were here before, didn't you hear anything we said? I'm sure I heard you speak." he added with a sideways glance.
"Oh! Yeah, you're that Toshi! Yeah, I heard that. Nice to meet you, I'm Gintoki. Now, to the heart of the matter Toshi-kun, are you gonna lend me those boxers or not?"
Hijikata thrust the boxers and a nearby pair of socks in Gintoki's face before his brain had time to think of an answer.
"Call me that again and I'll kill you."
Gintoki spit half a sock from his mouth and nodded halfheartedly.
"Whatever Toshi-kun, no need to be such a dick."
"It's Hijikata to you." he grumbled, unconsciously taking out another cigarette. It was already on his lips and ready to lit when a hand reached out towards it and plucked it out. Hijikata was so stunned he forgot to close his mouth.
"No smoking inside." Gintoki told him.
Hijikata's fluster seemed to double when he was forced to lock eyes with the stranger and gaze at his unusual crimson irises. For someone who looked the son of idleness, those disconcerting eyes were too much of a trap. Hijikata found himself holding his breath.
"You okay with that or what?" Gintoki's question came with more proximity and Hijikata was too disgruntled to rise to the challenge. The unexpected red gaze had taken him by surprise. He leaned back with what level of disgust he could muster and nodded his head, fumbling with the lighter while trying to shove it back into his pocket.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever."
Gintoki seemed to ignore his unease and slithered to the closet behind him, sliding the door open with his foot.
"You can have the right side. I fished out the crap Takatin left behind so it's all empty now," Gintoki said while scratching his underarm "You may not peek over my side, nor ogle my secret porn stash with lusty eyes, and you must ask nicely if you need extra closet space. I'll rent it"
Hijikata looked inside the closet and it was impossible to miss the clutter on Gintoki's side. There was an old miserable set of rulers dividing the space and both were on the verge of splitting and sending Gintoki's mess all over to Hijikata's side.
"What extra space?! Your shit is ridiculous."
"Guess we'll cross that bridge when we get there." Gintoki mumbled oh-so-wisely.
"Your futon doesn't even fit in here."
"I've been using your side to store it, I admit it."
"It ain't coming back here!"
"It gets a lot of action so it won't miss the closet much."
"What?!"
Hijikata looked aghast. He tried to keep down his lunch but when he turned to Gintoki and the man winked at him the struggle became quite real. Gintoki found it hard to keep a straight face and burst out laughing at Hijikata's shock. A throbbing vein popped up on his forehead.
"You're a big smartass, aren't you?" Hijikata hissed.
"And you a tightass."
(*****)
Apart from the days when he had a few odd jobs to run, a trade which he had undertaken during his college years and had now become his sole source of income, it was very bizarre to see Gintoki leave his apartment so early in the morning. For many it was an ominous sign. Catherine put up garlic cloves and crosses on her window when she saw him climb down the stairs after a cheerful Kagura. Otose, who was sweeping the entrance, squinted her eyes at him and felt compelled to pry into his business.
"Glad to see you out on a job Gintoki, I was beginning to think you were going for your third month without pay." she remarked with a smirk.
"You missed a spot back there." he said pointing to a random corner in the hallway. Otose readjusted her grip on the broom and snarled. Gintoki poked Kagura on the back urging her to walk faster.
"Gin-chan stop pushing me! It's not my fault you're lying." she whined.
Gintoki put a hand across his face to hide his dismay and tried to resist the urge to facepalm Kagura into the ground. Luckily for her, Sadaharu was waiting for her by the kennel, leash in his mouth. She ran to him to say goodbye and tie him down.
"So you're not out on a job. What in devil's name are you up to then?" Otose wondered, reproach all over her features.
"I am just taking Kagura to school like the responsible guardian that I am, what's it to you?" Gintoki replied irritated, his earwax suddenly becoming very interesting.
"That is so disturbing I can't even laugh at it." Otose said gravely. Gintoki shrugged his shoulders.
"Kagura let's go, leave the dog, come on."
They bade goodbye to a shaken Otose and went on their way without further ado. They walked two blocks down the road before they met Shinpachi on his way to their apartment. He was also looking surprised to see Gintoki about and immediately asked him what he was doing there, a big smile plastered on his face.
"Got a job today Gin-san?"
"No, not really." Gintoki replied. Shinpachi's smile lost a bit of its sparkle.
"Is the TV fixed already? Are you going to Gengai's?"
"Nope."
Shinpachi's smile became barely visible and he turned pink at the next question.
"I-is it a date with T-Tsu-Tsu-"
"No, it is not." Gintoki said again in a deadpan voice.
The smile on Shinpachi's face disappeared completely and the pink of embarrassment turned into a red of fury.
"Then what the hell are you doing out so early Gin-san? Are you going to hit the pachinko parlors at this hour? Do you know how shameful that is? Do you even have any money? Only old men estranged from their families and duty go play pachinko at this hour of the morning, I don't even think there are any parlors open. And worst of all, you try to make it look like you are taking Kagura to school, what the hell are you thinking, you-"
"Oi, oi, oi, which Shimura is this? The male or the female?" Gintoki wondered aloud, interrupting Shinpachi's outburst of emotion.
"Gin-san, please just watch yourself, don't go waste what little money you have left." Shinpachi pleaded while regaining his calm.
"He's an idiot, what can you do?" Kagura added with a sigh. Shinpachi agreed.
The three of them carried on towards Kagura's middle school, much to her delight. She went hand in hand with both boys and was reluctant to let go when they stopped at the gate.
"Go on and don't do anything stupid like eating the other kids' lunch. Ask them first."
"Yes, Gin-chan! Bye bye!" She scampered away and soon joined a group of friends from her class. Shinpachi looked at Gintoki with disapproval.
"That was some terrible advice, oi."
"Was it, Pachi-boy? Isn't it a little late for you to be giving adults a sermon?" Gintoki gestured towards the school clock and watched as Shinpachi bleached. He repressed a shriek of horror and left in a dash, school bag pressed against his chest. Gintoki watched him go with some amusement.
"High schoolers these days..."
Gintoki took a deep breath before continuing his journey. He wasn't sure he would be successful but it was either staying at home biting his nails and trying to ignore what had happened, which was impossible, or go around and do some inquiries. It was still hard to believe it had been Hijikata in front of him last night. Although Gintoki's connection with him seemed to baffle Mitsuba, her relationship with him was equally crippling to Gintoki. He had barely slept that night with a barrage of memories suddenly deciding to assault him every two minutes. His bloodshot eyes could attest to that, but in spite of it, Gintoki knew he wouldn't get any sleep until he knew for sure what was going on.
He passed by the Shimura dojo where Kondo still taught kendo and leeched about for more than ten years. It was quiet and peaceful at that hour, and once Gintoki caught Otae cleaning the floor of the back porch he knew the gorilla was nowhere to be seen. Everyone knew Otae avoided Kondo like the plague and after a decade she had become quite the pro at it. She beheld Gintoki with a full-on glare as soon as he came into sight. She clicked her tongue with annoyance and crouched again, devoting herself to the wooden floor.
"Yo" Gintoki greeted nonchalantly "Is the gorilla around?"
"I threatened to call the police on him half an hour ago. He ain't here." she grumbled.
"Is he home?"
"Do I look like I care?" she said, twisting the wet cloth in her hands with relish. Gintoki winced internally.
"No, sorry. I'll be going," he replied, though he stopped in his tracks when a question came back up his throat "Perhaps you didn't see him with a friend from-"
Otae slapped the cloth on the floor with a sharp cracking sound, it echoed throughout the empty dojo and scared away half a dozen birds in the nearby trees. Gintoki took it as his cue.
"See ya."
He cursed under his breath and kicked a pebble by the road. There were no words for how much he didn't want to do what he was about to. He had a bad feeling about it and he hated himself for knowing it. A slight tremor shook his legs just thinking about it and he could not believe his knees were quivering. He was almost thirty for fuck's sake. He took out his phone and skimmed through the numbers. He hit Kondo's but it just rang without anyone picking up.
"Shit."
Gintoki's mix of suicidal curiosity and bravery lasted until he was face to face with Kondo's front door. He had a finger ready to pummel the shit out of his doorbell and a fist eager to bang on the door, however, he was petrified. He played the possible outcome of the encounter a dozen times in his mind and not once did any words come to his mouth. He realized he had been led by his emotions like a fool and he would only play the part to completion if he ever rang the bell and Hijikata opened the door. The excitement that had built in his gut overnight died like a flame put to water and the steps he took back in regret felt like freedom. When he lost sight of Kondo's building he could even admit to some kind of relief. As a reward for good behavior, Gintoki stopped by the nearest convenience store and bought himself a bag full of sugary treats and the cheapest carton of strawberry milk they had.
The automatic sliding doors opened for his exit and he bumped into a short plain mass of black hair. Gintoki's first instinct was to complain and ask for an apology but the lollipop in his mouth made that a troublesome ordeal, not to mention the person in question turned out to be Yamazaki and Gintoki instantly devised other plans for him.
"Oh Danna!" Yamazaki exclaimed. He glanced at the watch on his wrist and then back at Gintoki.
"It's early." he stated blandly.
"I was out of sweets." Gintoki replied jiggling his shopping bag. Yamazaki's mouth formed an 'oh' in understanding but the distance of almost six blocks didn't feel right with him. Gintoki helped him get to the point since he knew where the conversation would inevitably lead to.
"Seen the gorilla around?" he asked.
"No, not really. He has been busy lately, he..." Yamazaki's voice died away before coming back with a gasp. His eyes widened and he looked apprehensively at Gintoki, then with excitement "Ah! Danna! I almost forgot to tell you! Maybe you know it already!" he spoke with enthusiasm, overwhelmed with the idea he might be the first to break the news to Gintoki "Hijikata-san is back! He's staying with Kondo-san until the application for his new apartment goes through. I hear it's very nice, not like what we're used to here in the district."
Gintoki's apathetic reaction crushed half of Yamazaki's joy. He wasn't sure if Gintoki knew of the occurrence already or if he had just screwed things up. It was not like Hijikata's name was taboo. Gintoki had become quite indifferent to it over the years. At some parties he might even participate in Kondo's nostalgic reminiscences of their years at the dorm without feeling weird. However, with the bastard back things were entirely different. Hijikata had stopped being an unsolved and forgotten matter of the past. Gintoki had never expected to see him again.
"You knew already?" Yamazaki wondered with a gloomy voice.
"Yeah."
"Were you going to see him then? He must be-"
"No." Gintoki cut in.
"Oh, I see," Yamazaki mumbled. He felt an awkward atmosphere settling in and kept talking in fear of further silence "So you and Hijikata-san didn't keep in touch all these years, uh?"
"Not really."
"Well, now that he's back you should see him. He'll be happy to see you I'm sure."
"Are you?" Gintoki had meant to sound indifferent but bitterness escaped any way. He cringed mentally but Yamazaki's honest answer pierced his somber layers.
"Yes." the reply was plain and the candid look on his face left no doubt. Yamazaki wasn't trying to convince him, he said what he thought to be true. Gintoki let out a chuckle and crossed his arms behind his back.
"Good to see you Jimmy-kun. We'll catch up more later."
"See ya, Danna."
They parted ways and Gintoki went home with a smaller weight on his back, eager to indulge himself in his sweets.
AN: I feel like this is going to be a long one. Please bear with me. Next chapter there will be present-day Hijikata's POV, I promise. Also, thanks to everyone who reviewed and read this story. Your support gives me incredible motivation, thank you!