Tomorrow I have my first exam... HELP ME OUT OF THIS HELL!.. Okay *clears her throat*

Moving on, I'll make it a multi chap but I will not do everyone's reactions... like I won't do Valentine's reaction

And also it won't be in the order of the last chap.

It was Jonathan, her brother, who found her there.

He almost wet himself when he saw her.

She lay there on the ground.

Blood seeping out of her arms, legs, shoulders, everywhere she let the blade cross her skin.

In her left hand she held her death note, the right hand was left open, when she died the pen rolled out her hands.

He called 911 although he knew she would never breath again.

"Hello, what's your emergency?" The voice said.

"M-my s-sis-sister co-com-commi- kill-killed h-herself." He said with trembling words.

"Where are you know, sir?"

"H-hom-home."

"What's your address?" She asked softly. He answered.

"Will be arriving soon, sir."

He hung up after those words.

He slowly walked towards her lifeless body. He looked at her face that was slightly covered by her flaming red hair, her eyes and mouth were closed.

Guild overwhelmed him.

Something really wrong must have happened to push her to taking her life.

And not a second later he remembered the conversation he had with her a couple months ago.

Then he though back of the white paper covered in blood that was in her hand.

He slowly opened her hand and took the white covered red in his hands.

When he had it in his hand someone barged in the room and soon others followed. They were all screaming at each other but he didn't understand what was spoken. He just let his eyes look at paper. It was a drawing from a girl falling into the darkness of a ravine, her dress and her were flying around her while she tried to grab onto the air.

That must be how she felt these last days. Falling into an endless hole. He turned around the drawing to find the words that she would never speak but he could only see a couple of words through the tears that were escaping from his eyes.

Siblings. Help. Believing.

When he tried to wipe the tears away he saw that the people were leaving to go to the hospital

"We have to take her to the hospital to investigate her." He demanded to go along with them. He wanted to be with his sister to make up for all the times he wasn't there. He didn't know how it happened, as children they were so close.

"Higher! Higher!" Little Clary screamed to her 9-year old big brother. He was pushing the swing. She was wearing a white sunshine dress, and her hair was in two piggy-tails. It looked cute, thoughtJonathan. It was almost magical, seeing her eyes shine brighter each push.

"Your wish is my command!" And he pushed her higher, amazed by the big smile, and the light in her eyes. She loved the swing, especially when he pushed her.

"Come on Johnny! You can do better!" She said, aching to go higher. At the time she believed how higher she'd go, how closer she'd be to heaven.

"Don't call me Johnny, you strawberry!" Nonetheless he pushed harder. Too hard, he realized when he heard her scream the moment she touched the ground.

"Everything okay? Clare-Bear?" He asked concerned, helping her up. She had glassy eyes, and a pout.

"My knee hurts!" She whines. He set her on the swing and looked at her knee. Just a flesh wound.

"Come, we'll go nurse it."

"But it hurts!"

"Yes, now we'll go make it better!"

"Would you pwease-weasy cwarry me?" She asked, pouting, and doing puppy-eyes. She may be 4, she knew how to wind her brother around her finger.

"Of course, Clare-Bear." He took her in his arms, and went to the house.

"Mom! Mom!" He screamed only to find a small letter on the table

We're home in 10 minutes.

Love, Mom and Dad.

"Well looks like I'm gonna nurse you." He said to her, as he placed her on a chair.

"Do you know how to do that?" She asked curiously.

"Yes, I'm a boy, I fall so many times. I've seen mom do it several times." He explained, while searching the drawers for a first-aid kit.

"Aha! Found it" He exclaimed, proudly holding it above his head. He laid it down on the table, and opened it. He took some cottonwool and desinfector.

"Clare-Bear this will sting a little." She closed her eyes like she was going to something extremely painful. It was cute how she closed her eyes not wanting to see it.

"Aww It hurts!" Jonathan chuckled at her. The older version from him will probably say something like 'Grow up, Cry-Baby!' But Jonathan wasn't so bitter at the time he only said.

"It first has to go worse to turn better."

"That doesn't make sense, and you know that." Clary glared at her brother when he chuckled.

"Sorry you're just too cute to be normal." He took a plaster and placed it on her knee.

"Here you go." She hesitated before she jumped of the chair. She looked at it and when she looked up to her brother she said;

"Thanks Johnny, you're the best big brother I know!" She kissed him on the cheek and ran towards the swing.

"I'm the only brother you have." He screamed after her.

"Are you coming or what?" She screamed at him. He shook his head before running after his little sister.

'You're the best big brother..."

It echoed through his head. He wasn't. He wanted to be but he wasn't nor will he ever be.

He was too selfish for that. He abandoned her, let her fall into a bottomless hole.

He hated himself for it.

Through hard times siblings help each other. You could have helped me by believing.

He should have believed her when he had the chance. He should have listened to her when he had the chance.

Don't wait for second chances, take the first chance you have. It might be the only one you'll get.