DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter, Twilight or any of their respective characters, they belong to JK Rowling, Stephanie Meyer and the appropriate publishing houses and film studios e.t.c. This is purely a work of fiction
AN: Okay, here's the first official chapter to White Flag. I had it done before the prologue, but I really wanted it beta'd before I posted it. So, some credit definitely has to got to Kirallie and The Group of One for their joint effort in correcting my mistakes in this chapter.
A note on content: I'm strictly British, so the only time you'll get an American dialect from this is when an American character is speaking/thinking. This is the first and only time I'll say this, just a head's up.
Updates from now on will probably be once per month, although I will not probably update from May-June because of my final exams.
Why Pain's the Only Way to Happiness
And you're asking me why pain's the only way to happiness,
But I promise you you'll see the sun again.
-See the Sun - Dido
__________
"We'll take it together. . . On three."
One . . .
Two . . .
Three . . .
AVADA KEDAVRA!
"Your arm Wormtail . . . No, your other one."
CRUCIO!
EXPELLIARMUS!
"Take my body back, Harry, please."
"I won't forget you."
"I'll always . . ."
". . . Love you"
)(0)(
In the smallest bedroom of Number Four, Privet Drive, one Harry Potter lurched forward in his bed after reliving some of the most painful memories of his life. The teenage wizard blinked for a few seconds, allowing his eyes to adjust to the darkness and the haze from his dreams to clear away from his mind. Harry squinted at the bright blue numbers on his alarm clock and groaned, flopping back onto his mattress. 11.48.
'Great.' Harry thought to himself, 'I can't sleep at least one bloody hour without getting these damn nightmares.' He rolled over to face Hedwig's now empty cage with a sigh. He hoped his beloved owl was okay with Hermione, she was the best choice to Harry in the ten minutes that he'd had after coming home and being subjected to Vernon Dursley's cruel threats.
Still, Harry would take the Dursleys over Hogwarts any day. Here there were no surprises around every corner; there was no pressure to live up to the expectations of strangers, there was no being watched or judged every minute of every day. Despite the happy times that he spent at Hogwarts, Harry didn't think that he could stand another year in that place…in the Gryffindor common room where he, Hermione and Ron had conspired with Sirius Black, marauder extraordinaire. Nor could Harry pretend that his already broken heart wasn't crumbling every time when he passed the hidden corners where whispers were shared and sweet kisses stolen. Harry could no longer sacrifice his sanity or his well being by keeping up the farce that was Harry Potter – The Idiot in Love with Unobtainable Cho Chang.
No, Cedric Diggory meant so much more to the young wizard. And whilst Harry wouldn't speak up about their relationship, he would never deny the love that they had both felt for each other.
Distracting himself, Harry tried to think about less painful topics like Fred and George's new joke shop, his much anticipated stay at Grimmauld Place as well as his upcoming sixteenth birthday. It was impossible; he'd spent too long thinking about it already. Harry reached under his bed and quietly slid out a photo album and flipped to a specific page. He propped the book against his clock so that as Harry fell asleep again, the last thing he saw was a photograph of the late Cedric Diggory.
)(0)(
Remus frowned for what felt like the umpteenth time as he once again went through the Ministry forms in his hands. He examined each one carefully and every now and then, his gaze would flick over to the set of keys by his mug.
"You can't put it off, you know." A voice piped up from the doorway.
The werewolf looked up to meet Nymphadora Tonks' amused face. "Wotcher, Remus." The clumsiest Auror known to wizardkind was leaning on the doorframe to the Grimmauld Place library smiling sympathetically with electric blue hair framing her face.
"I know, I know." Remus sighed. He pushed the papers away from him and shifted in his seat. Tonks took the armchair in front of him. "It's just that I want to leave this place. I mean, there's nothing tying me to Grimmauld Place…or England for that matter."
"What about the Order?"
"Oh, please! You know as well as I do how productive Dumbledore's Order is." Tonks hummed in agreement.
"But then why all the fuss?" The metamorphmagus asked before she answered her own question. "You don't want to leave Harry behind…or Sirius."
"That's right." Remus confirmed. "Even though he won't be giving up his magic, I highly doubt that Harry will want to leave behind his friends or Hogwarts for me…I'm being selfish just considering it. And as for Sirius? I for one refuse to believe that my friend is dead. There has to be something more to that damned veil." Remus muttered his tone becoming angry as he spoke of the man who many believed to be deceased.
"Harry wants you in his life more than you can comprehend, especially after all that palaver last year. Sirius was exactly what that boy needed, you knew it and you let yourself take the backseat, but I know that you've always been looking out after Harry… McGonagall told me so." Here, Remus tried to speak up but failed. "She said that you were always asking after him, straight from his first year. You paid for half of his first broom-"
"I had savings which I'd never use!"
"Oh be quiet you!" Tonks scolded him. "You've been wearing the same clothes for years and you've gotten a job in the muggle world so it's not like you don't have enough money for some new clothes."
"Is it a crime for me to want to save my money?"
"Yes! It is with robes like that!"
"What exactly is wrong with my-" Remus started after he examined his rather worn robes. "Oh, for Merlin's sake Nymphadora! This is getting rather ridiculous."
"Do not call me Nymphadora, Remus!" Tonks ordered, her face flushing and her hair turning an incredibly angry shade of red.
"Well I wouldn't, but you're making such a big fuss out of this!" Lupin shouted.
"So are you!" Tonks retorted angrily.
Both the wizard and witch paused, breathing heavily. Unable to find a logical response, Remus Lupin did the only thing that he felt he could do…
He burst into a hearty laughter and the deep sound of it startled Tonks into releasing an odd squeak at the unexpected yet refreshing sound.
"What on Earth is so funny, Remus?"
Remus' laughter only grew when he saw Tonks with her hands on her hips.
"Remus!"
The sound of Remus' laughter died down as the man struggled to catch his breath. "I'm sorry Tonks." He apologised. "It's just that, well, you should really see yourself. You look almost like Molly Weasley!"
Tonks scowled briefly, and then opened her mouth, ready to defend herself before she paused for a moment, thinking about what Remus said. "Okay, I can see where you're coming from." She said, a bit too quickly. The Auror then dissolved into a peal of giggles, the force of which caused her frame to shake slightly. Tonks did sober from her fit of laughter when she saw the depressed expression on her friend's face. "Oh, Remus," She sighed. "You can't keep torturing yourself for something that none of us could have prevented…you have to let Harry make up his own mind. When he does, you might be surprised." Tonks scowled when her words had no effect. "Well in the least, you need to stop thinking about these thoughts. It's not doing you any good whatsoever. We all miss Si-" Tonks stopped abruptly, placing her hands over her mouth, knowing that she was speaking out of place. She was lucky when Remus only stared into the distance, not paying attention anymore. A silence which could be considered awkward fell into place, and Tonks suddenly found the carpet quite interesting.
"I want to take him with me, Tonks." Remus said suddenly, his lips forming a bitter smile. "This…this world we live, it's not right for him. Yes it's opened doors for Harry and given joy to him, but the bad outweighs the good! Harry doesn't deserve all this pain, this misery, this…shit!" The werewolf's voice darkened into a low growl. "He shouldn't have the eyes of every witch or wizard on him twenty four–seven. They shouldn't be picking holes in him when they've all done only Merlin-knows-what! My cub should never have had to fight Voldemort, let alone have heard of him! And as for Dumbledore? I have absolutely no idea what goes on in that idiot's head. I mean, come on, Quirrell had Voldemort installed in the back of his head for a disturbingly large amount of time and Albus didn't get suspicious!"
"Not everyone's infallible, Remus, you should know that."
"I know, I know, trust me when I say that I do. But did you know that Harry watched his teacher burn? Die from his burning touch…Harry must have gone through so much trauma that night…and from what Minerva tells me, all Albus did was go and reassure that the Philosopher's Stone was safe and that Harry did indeed kill Quirrell. How much guilt do you think Harry went through? And Albus just shipped him back to the Dursley's! It's complete and utter bollocks!"
"Easy Remus," Tonks soothed. "You'll get the whole house up here."
"Who cares anymore?"
At that point, a heavy footfall could be heard coming up the stairs. "It's all right, Tonks." Kingsley Shacklebolt called out. He entered the library and propped himself against the wall by the doorway. "Everyone left a while back, I'm the only one here. I kicked Dumbledore out just after you escaped the kitchen." Here, Kingsley chuckled. "I'm surprised you didn't hear all the fuss and shouting." He commented.
"I put a noise limiter spell on this room when I moved in." Remus explained softly. He didn't see a point in keeping his anger any longer, it wasn't productive and he would only hurt his friends. The werewolf did give his friend a grateful smile for distracting him.
"Ah." Kingsley understood; the house could get noisy with people coming in and out all the time.
"What? Great-aunt Wally wake up again?" Tonks asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Only after Molly accidentally woke her up. She was very upset." Kingsley sighed.
"What was she doing?" Remus asked, concerned for the Weasley matriarch.
"Molly? Having a nervous breakdown. She's been affected more than we think"
"Poor, woman." Tonks sighed sympathetically. They'd all been affected by the loss of Sirius, even Molly Weasley who had lost a sparring partner in the dog animagus. "What happened?"
"Dumbledore ordered her to start redecorating. She burst into tears afterwards, and then her kids had to take her out."
"What right does he have?" Remus questioned rhetorically. "I don't believe the nerve of that man. This is my home now!, Sirius left it to me and Harry, Dumbledore had no right to ask that of poor Molly…even though the decorating really is vile in here."
Kingsley smirked at Remus' afterthought. "Albus caused a lot of damage with his words, he wasn't even sorry."
"Speaking of this being your home, are you sure you don't mind us living here?" Tonks asked, gesturing towards herself and Kingsley whilst she tried to change the subject before her friend got upset over Dumbledore again.
"I prefer having company than living alone and it's more convenient for the both of you…and besides, I'll be moving out soon enough." Remus said, trailing off into a sigh. Halfway into February, he'd been given his two-month's notice from his landlord. Apparently the man wanted to sell and Remus simply couldn't afford the price of the country house, even with his savings and the currency change from their money into pounds. After he got evicted, Remus had gotten a room in a B and B, it didn't eat up much of his funds and the owners hadn't asked questions when he disappeared. That had lasted until Sirius found out and got offended that his friend hadn't asked for a room at Grimmauld Place. He'd settled into a spare room, but in his grief he had soon moved into the room where Sirius used to sleep. After receiving the deeds to the property, Remus had asked Kingsley and Tonks to move in, for they were the ones who spent the most time at Headquarters.
"I heard about that," Shacklebolt grinned when both his housemates blushed. "I'll support you and Harry whatever happens…As will Arthur and his lads. I wouldn't count on Molly or her daughter though."
"Aww, Kings is a real gentleman." Tonks teased.
"And you, my dear, are a pest."
Tonks stuck her tongue out at her superior before she got up and hugged both of the men. "Night, you two!" She called out as she left the room. Both men bade their friend goodnight before turning to each other.
"Well," Remus began. "These are all in order." He nodded towards the papers he'd set aside. "I just need to get Harry to sign them if he decides to come."
"He will, don't you worry." Kingsley assured his companion. He gathered the forms in one hand and pulled Remus to his feet with the other. "Come on, Lupin. Bed. Being worried is bad for the health, even that of a werewolf."
Kingsley led Remus to his bedroom door, silent as ever. However, Remus couldn't ignore that the other man had failed to let go of his hand. "Uhh…Kingsley?" Remus began, hesitating and unsure of the situation.
"You should laugh more, Remus." Kingsley declared to the smaller man suddenly. "You've been unhappy for far too long." He commented.
"Where exactly are you going with this, Kingsley?" Remus asked suspiciously. "What are you trying to s-mmph!"
Remus blinked owlishly at the warm feeling on his lips, stunned by Kingsley's sudden and unexpected kiss. The contact last a few seconds before Kingsley moved his mouth away, his expression was indecipherable, making Remus feel even more uncomfortable.
"I'm sorry, Kingsley," Remus murmured sadly in the dark. "But I can't reciprocate your feelings."
He was rather surprised however, when Kingsley simply smiled and nodded. "Don't worry, I understand. It must be hard." The auror said before retiring to his room, not saying anything apart from a low "Goodnight Remus."
Remus was left alone in the dark staring at the horrid wallpaper peeling from the opposite wall. "Eh?" he asked the empty hallway before he shook his head and turned to enter Sirius' old room.
)(0)(
The twenty-fifth of July began with Harry packing away his meagre possessions fairly early in the morning. He had received a letter from Remus asking if it was possible for him to be picked up a week earlier. Harry had responded that yes, it was fine, seeing as his aunt would be walking out on her husband and son by the end of the week- And, did the order know that this was happening?
After placing his books and clothes in his trunk, Harry carefully wrapped his father's invisibility cloak around the Marauders' Map and his photo album then he tucked his treasured items between several layers of Weasley jumpers. Much to Harry's chagrin, he hadn't grown much since starting Hogwarts, and as a result of this lack of development, Harry stood at a meagre five foot and two inches, still allowing him to fit into his first Weasley jumper and keep the majority of his robes. Shaking his head slightly, Harry couldn't help but feel proud of himself because he'd managed to spend two nights in a row without needing to see either Cedric or Sirius' smiling faces in order to fall asleep.
'This means I'm coping right?' Harry asked himself. 'I'm not forgetting, I just need to move on and be strong for the others, especially Remus.' In their correspondences, Harry hadn't failed to note that Remus also hadn't mentioned Sirius' name which made Harry think that Remus was also finding it hard to cope with their common loss.
And with that thought, Harry plucked his wand from beneath the loose floorboard and tucked it in the holder under the sleeve of what he liked to refer to as a 'Vintage Dudley Special' just as Uncle Vernon ordered him downstairs to make breakfast.
"I'll be down in a minute!" Harry yelled, replacing the floorboard.
"You'd better be, boy." Vernon belted back. He'd interrupted Petunia from whatever she had been about to say, which was evident from the angry "Vernon!" which could be heard coming from the patio. Harry quickly locked his trunk and placed Hedwig's cage and his Firebolt (which he kept under his bed) on top of it. The teenager then hurried down the stairs, knowing not to test Vernon Dursley's incredibly thin patience.
"Good morning Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia." Harry droned automatically at the sight of his relatives. Vernon was sitting at the dining table, reading the morning paper with a rather disgruntled expression whilst Petunia was on the patio organising some plant cuttings, which Harry had helped her take the day before, into boxes.
A sharp glare from Vernon preceded an annoyed, "Don't give me any lip, boy!"
'I see someone's still a bit sensitive.' The young wizard observed. "Sorry Uncle Vernon." He apologised at the same time.
"I'm sure you are." Vernon grumbled scathingly. "Dudley should be getting up soon so get started already." Vernon ordered, nodding towards the cooker.
"Yes sir." Harry moved to the kitchenette and went to take a frying pan out of one of the cupboards. 'He's worse than bloody Snape, he is.' Just as he was about to turn on the gas, Harry's aunt came in from the garden and surveyed the kitchen quickly. Petunia's eyes landed on Harry in the kitchen, then Vernon at the table. She was soon shrieking at her soon-to-be ex-husband.
"Vernon Dursley! How dare you think that you can still treat my nephew like a flipping slave after all he's been through!" Petunia screeched.
"But, Pet…" The man began, his blood draining from his face. If Vernon Dursley was good at one thing (apart from eating that is) then it was the simple understanding of knowing when he was in trouble and when he'd blown all of his chances.
"Don't you 'Pet' me! Vernon Dursley, you bastard! If you can shag that dumb bimbo receptionist of yours, then you can bloody well cook for yourself you pigheaded man!"
'He's done for.' Harry thought, slightly amused. 'I guess Trelawney was right with all that karma stuff.'
Dudley, who seemed to have actually lost weight, came in with a confused expression. He was so wrapped up in his next boxing match and the local girls that he'd failed to notice the feud between his parents.
"I'd get out of here if I were you." Harry advised.
Dudley turned and glared at him, "What do you know you little freak." He grunted rhetorically. Harry just shook his head and quickly left the room. He decided to sit at the top of the stairs and listen in on the argument.
Apparently, Vernon had come out of his stupor and had begun shouting at his wife. "Now listen here, woman! I've had to put up with that thing for sixteen bloody years! He's been nothing but a nuisance. He should have had that filth beaten out of him when he was young, like I said all those years ago! But no! You just had to protect the spawn of your whore of a sister!"
Two things happened at that moment; the first was a result of a quick magical surge as every light bulb in the hallway exploded and the shattered glass eroded into sand as it hit the carpet and the area around Harry. The second was the resounding thwack as flesh hit flesh. Aunt Petunia had slapped Uncle Vernon and both were shaking with rage.
"How dare you!" Petunia seethed. "How dare you talk about my sister and nephew in that way! I'm leaving Vernon, and I never want to see your face again." She hissed.
Harry bolted down the stairs, knowing his uncle's temper, the man would react badly and he wanted to make sure that his aunt would be safe. He was right. Just as Harry entered the doorway Vernon reared back slightly, roaring with anger.
"I'll teach you, you bloody bitch!"
Harry stood frozen and wide eyed as his aunt crashed against the dining table, the cheap, fake wood easily collapsing under the force of her weight. "Aunt Petunia!" He shouted, wand falling into his hand, whilst Dudley jeered at his mother. Harry's heart skipped a beat when she did not stir.
"Hit her again, dad!" The pig of a bastard laughed sadistically. Harry knew his cousin was spoilt and sometimes cruel, but he was honestly shocked by Dudley's response to his mum getting beaten. Didn't he care at all? Didn't he know how much Petunia had sacrificed for him? Harry snarled as the large man proceeded to accommodate his son's wants and needs as always by lifting his arm again to hit his unmoving wife. Harry raised his wand. 'Stupefy' on the tip of his tongue. However, he did not have a chance to once again break a law he was very familiar with as at that exact moment, just as Harry was opening his mouth, Vernon's body jerked backwards and the man fell to the floor, unconscious.
"You little freak! I'll fucking kill you!" Dudley howled, easily assuming that his father was lying comatose on the floor was because of his little cousin. He never got to make his words a reality for he too fell to the floor like his father as soon as the threat had left his lips. Harry stared at the spot where Dudley had previously been pulling a large, meaty fist back to punch him. The stunned teenager turned slowly to the patio door where three men stood by his and Aunt Petunia's cuttings from the garden, wands raised with anger and worry marring their features.
"Harry?" The tallest on the left asked, hesitantly.
One of the other wizards knelt by Petunia's side and began running diagnostic spells. "She's fine, just unconscious." The usually snarky voice breathed in relief.
Harry found himself enfolded in the third man's arms. He breathed in the familiar and comforting scent. "Oh God, Harry. Thank God we got here when we did." The man moaned into his hair. "Oh Cub, my little cub."
The arms tightened around him and Harry found himself sobbing into Remus' arms, shaking with fear and shock.
)(0)(
At that point in time, in the ruined kitchen come dining room of Number Four, Privet Drive, several decisions were made, decisions that were set in stone. Little did anyone in the perfect house that housed a not-so-perfect family know, because of the affair of one Vernon Dursley and the indirect abuse by one Albus Dumbledore, several fates changed that time, diverging into the unknown, to the point of no return.
Thousands of miles away, in the sleepy town of Forks, Washington, where another not-so-perfect family resided in an oh-so-perfect house, one of the occupants smiled and giggled into her hand, blocking her thoughts from her brother. Even though her vision was vague, the girl knew one thing.
'Thing's are going to get interesting around here!'
Yay! First chapter posted. I wrote this before the prologue thus the quick update. Once again, a major thanks to my lovely betas. The next chapter should be up in a month's time (that's how long it takes me to write 'em)
Thanks to all the people who reviewed, added White Flag and myself to favourites, alerts and C2s. I was overwhelmed by the success of my titchy first post. Just reading the number of hits amazed me.