a/n: the following excerpts from songs are used in this story. i do not pretend to own them.
Black Hole Sun- Sound Garden (1)
Chop Suey!- System of A Down (2)
Sweet Angel- The Toadies (3)
Stinkfist- Tool (4)
Paint it Black- Tour of Duty (5)
Blinded By the Silence of 1,000 Broken Hearts- The Artful Sailor Neptune
I suppose to be able to understand my dire situation you might have to know a little bit about myself and past before you can get the gist of this ordeal.
So here it goes.
I was born on March 6, 1983. I was the middle child of a family of four. It was my older sister, Kasumi, my brother Hiroshi, then I, then my youngest sibling, Mika, who is but 7. My older sister, Kasumi, died at the age of 17, when she was brutally murdered right before my mother, by a mad man who was angry with my father. That man is now behind bars. I lived in fear during my childhood, as I thought something bad would become of me, too.
'I see a red door
And I want it painted black
No colors anymore
I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by
Dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head
Until my darkness goes' 5*
My brother, Hiroshi, was 21 at the time of his death. He was a good man, who had an extraordinary amount of potential to become something good. However, he fell into the wrong hands as he met a man that persuaded him with money and women. He ended up in debt to a man by the name of Indo Morioka, the administrator of the 'black hand'. In fear of dying a horrible death at the will of Indo's assassins, Hiroshi killed himself. He put a gun to his mouth. I was only 17. After his death, I was mute. I was consumed by darkness and I believed that there was nothing good in this world for me. But I swore I would not let Hiroshi's fate interfere with mine or my parents, so I knew what I had to do.
'I see a line of cars
And they're all painted black
With flowers and my love
Both never to come back
I see them turn their heads
Quickly look away
Like a newborn baby
It just happens every day' 5*
Because my parents were so wealthy, they had the investigation close quite quickly. But I know this matter went a lot farther than the police. I discovered from Hiroshi's friends the real reason he killed himself. And I felt no remorse. For if I had been in that position, I would have killed myself, too.
'I look inside my self
And see my heart is black
I see my red door
And I want it painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away
And not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up
When your whole world is black ' 5*
I knew that business with Morioka was not done; and pretty soon he would be after my family for money; or our lives. In order to restore peace and safety to my ill-fated family, I made an appointment with Morioka and bargained my services in return for safety for my family. I was to be an undercover contract killer. I was to become a ninja. My
In order to gain the esteem of Morioka, I had to prove I could be anything our targets wanted to me to be. I cheated, I lied, I stole, and I violated innocent human beings. And I felt dirty.
'I see a red door
And I want it painted black
No colors anymore
I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by
Dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head
Until my darkness goes ' 5*
My parents were to busy mourning the deaths of their children and worrying about the public opinion about them to see the changes in me. I no longer went out with friends. I no longer attended college. I wardrobe was black. And I no longer smiled. Ever. My life was nothing but Indo Morioka. And he was the bane of my existence. The Prince of Darkness himself could not find better ways to torture my soul.
One of the worst things I have endured was finding another head assassin for Morioka. He had heard of a young gangster that was notorious for being smooth, deadly, and under paid.
"Come on, baby." I remember Morioka whispering in my ear while rubbing my thigh. "If you find this guy for me, I guarantee things will be a lot easier on you." I knew I could not ever refuse him. Refusing him meant I was an invalid. And Morioka did not take well with invalids.
"Very well…" I murmured, without a faint sound of distaste in my voice. "I'll find and recruit T'enoh Haruka."
T'enoh Haruka was a young, dashingly handsome, aspiring racer. No one would suspect that one who did so much good for society (i.e. racing for charities) could be someone so bad ( a respected contract killer for the assassin firms). I openly admit that I fell in love with her when I met her. Our first meeting was, well you could say… romantic.
I remember the bar hostess telling me that T'enoh had a thing for young females with white skin. So naturally, I put on the most revealing black dress I owned, pinned my hair up (where my 'black hand' tattoo I had received at my initiation could be seen) and dangerous black heels, the straps spiraling up my thighs. Of course, I had my trusty dagger stuck in my black panties, just in case T'enoh could not be trusted. I covered my face with so much makeup, no one would recognize me. I remember running my hands up my body. I was horribly thin, due to the fact of my depression and lack of appetite. But luckily, I had the white skin of a child, and blue piercing eyes.
When the time was right, I strode into the bar, with another woman holding my hand. I made sure I had everyone's attention on myself and my date, Kaori, (the bomb extraordinaire for the 'black hand') as I made my move. I began to stroke Kaori's dark, flawless face while smirking at the charming blonde that was staring our way. I recognized T'enoh Haruka just by the way she was sitting, wearing a black duster and a sleek black belt holding a 6. mm gun. She had a foxish look about her. She has been sitting with a blonde girl, with legs that went on for miles, but instead at staring at her companion, her eyes were locked with mine. I took Kaori's face in my hands and began to kiss her face passionately, as she began to rub up against me. I almost burst out laughing watching Haruka's face, desire written all over it. I gently whispered in Kaori's ear to get our plan into motion. I reached up and gently fingered my diamond stud on my left ear. Automatically, another very attractive woman, (Aki, from the Genocide Sector of the Black Hand) came and sat on the other side of me and began talking. Kaori rose from her seat and gently licked my cheek, before slithering off, in search of Haruka's date. Seeing how my date had left me, Haruka the automatically stood up and advanced over to me.
'No more will my green sea
Go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee
This thing happening to you.
If I look hard enough
Into the setting sun,
My love will laugh with me
Before the morning comes' 5*
"You're beautiful…"
"Your point?"
"I must have you."
"Quite the contrary I must have you." She laughed. Aki stood up and left.
"Oh really?"
"Indeed. As you know nothing about me, I know everything there is to know about you, 0127 Agent T'enoh."
"That's not true."
"What part?" Haruka reached up and grabbed the nape of my neck. I reached down for my dagger…
"The part about me knowing nothing about you." Haruka began to finger my tattoo. "You're a 'black hand' agent aren't you?" I relaxed and dropped my hands to my sides. "0306 Agent Kaioh Michiru."
"Yes." She took both my hands and held them firmly.
"And you're here for me, aren't you?" I nodded, pursing my lips. Haruka's firm expression softened, then she whirled her gun up and held it to my throat. "And what makes you think you can have me?" I was taken by surprise and unarmed. Shit.
"We have powerful associates. We will pay you…"
"How much?"
"How ever much you want." Haruka looked thoughtfully at Kaori, whom was dancing with her date.
"That's not enough. But, I'll tell you what," She said, returning her gun to her holster. "I'll join, just as long as I get to work with you."
"Me?" I asked. "I'm not for sale."
"Well there isn't enough money in this world to get me to work for Morioka." She said, signaling the hostess.
"But you said…"
"I wasn't finished." She said sharply. "I said there isn't enough money in this world to get me to work for Morioka. But, there is you." She smiled the most picturesque smile the world had ever seen before downing a vodka tonic.
I look inside my self
See my heart is back
I see my red door
And I want it painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away
And not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up
When your whole world is black 5*
Haruka said, to prove my loyalty, I was to come home with her that night, and in the morning (after breakfast of course) we would go together to sign the contract with Morioka. Because my job was on the line, (and Haruka was simply gorgeous) I agreed.
'Make up your mind.
Decide to walk with me,
Around the lake tonight.
Around the lake tonight…
By my side.
By my side….' 3*
It was pitch dark in her apartment. After I stepped inside, she slammed the door and locked it. She did not turn on a light. I turned around.
'I'm not gonna lie…
I'll not be a gentleman,
Behind the boathouse,
I'll show you my dark secret…' 3*
"Haruka?" I heard her unsheathe a knife. My heart froze. I closed my eyes and said my prayers. I opened my eyes in shock when I heard the knife swipe close to me quickly. Suddenly, my dress fell from my body. And the lights flickered on.
'Don't be afraid,
I don't mean to scare you,
So help me,
Jesus…' 3*
"Scared?"
"No… I was just wondering what the hell you are doing." Haruka looked down at my lingerie. She eyed the dagger.
"Do you always dress this dangerously?" I laughed.
"Only when I plan on meeting dangerous people." Haruka's face turned grim and she came close to my face. She reached down and pulled the dagger from my panties and dropped it to the floor.
"Consider me no danger to you, Michiru." Before I could open my mouth, Haruka took my face in her hands and kissed me, with a long, passionate kiss. I instantly felt at ease.
'I'm not gonna lie…
I want you for mine.
My flesh and blood.
My lover, be my lover yeah.' 3*
I pulled away from the kiss, and looked at Haruka coyly. I had never been kissed like that.
"Why are you doing this?" Haruka smiled, a soft, sexy smile, and took my hand, and let me to her lavish bed room. She quietly dimmed the lights and slipped behind me.
"Because you're the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen." Haruka said, whispering in my ear. "You, who have the innocent look of a child can be an assassin, and understand why I'm doing this. You won't think any less of me. We're together in this. And I trust you." Haruka spun me around, and I faced her, with a serious expression. She wasn't lying. "You're an angel of mercy in a city of darkness." She said, quite seriously. She brought me closer, and her immaculate beauty overcame me. "You're the girl I've always dreamed of meeting; a woman who will love me even though I take the lives of others. Because she does the same. We're the same. I can feel it, Michiru. We belong together. Do you feel it?" I was silent for a moment. Finally, I took a deep breath and prepared to answer her question.
'Father into your hands, I commend my spirit
Father into your hands
why have you forsaken me
In your eyes forsaken me
In your thoughts forsaken me
In your heart forsaken?' 2*
At that moment, God had taken the ability for me to say no. I did not possess the power to decline Haruka's offer. I could not. True, I had amazing feelings for her, but, the part about taking the lives of others. I did not want to do this. This was not my passion. I was saving my family. I was saving our name. I could not tell her this, no, not now. So, it seems like God had decided my fate.
"Hang my head,
Drown my fear,
Till you all just disappear." 1*
"I feel it, Haruka." I said, fulfilling my every desire by bringing her lips to mine. There, that kiss was it. That kiss formed a bond between us. Was it love? I could not say. But whatever it was, it was strong. It connected us. To me, it was passion, strength, jealousy, anger, and neediness all mixed up together in a feverish haze of kissing, touching, and thrusting. I had never made love like that before. And Haruka could tell,
'Finger deep within the borderline.
Show me that you love me and that we belong together.
Relax, turn around and take my hand. ' 4*
"Haruka!"
"Ohh, take is easy Michiru."
"It… it… it…"
"That's perfectly natural, Michiru. Just relax."
"I… I… I… it feels so good..."
"It's supposed to, darling."
"Please…. don't stop."
"The thought had not even crossed my mind."
'Knuckle deep inside the borderline.
This may hurt a little but it's something you'll get used to.
Relax. Slip away.' 4*
I remember crying out in sheer pain. A good kind of pain. Haruka wasn't used to laying with virgins, so was a little rough. I remember dozing off soon afterwards. But not soon enough to hear Haruka having a word with her private god.
"Well I promise you,
I will treat you well,
My sweet angel,
So help me,
Jesus." 3*
"God…? if there is a god… if there is a god that will ever listen to my pleas… I've found… I've found the only girl for me. And if you would… protect her from all the bad, protect her from harm. I beseech you, just give me this one thing." And Haruka wrapped her strong arms around me, and went to sleep. As did I.
'I,
Cry,
When angels deserve to die." 2 *
Damn, damn, damn, damn. I fell victim to her passion. I fell victim to her ways. I fell victim to her faith. Her everlasting faith. The faith she had in us that kept us together. I died the day Haruka signed a full contract with Morioka. My soul died. My spirit died. My pursuit of happiness failed. Haruka dedicated her life to taking other's. And it wasn't right. But she was right. We were in this together. And I hated myself.
Everyday for the following year we set out in search of new victims, new clients, new enemies. Everyday, we took a life. And it always shocked me when Haruka was would grow excited killing a victim. She'd get carried away. She's stab and stab and stab… and the blood, oh the blood. I smelled it on me, I smelled it on her as she kissed me after a job well done. I didn't know how much longer I could go on living like this. But I didn't know what to do. I was so confused. So, confused.
'Indisposed
In disguise
As no one knows
Hides the face
Lies the snake
The sun
In my disgrace
Boiling heat
Summer stanch
'Neath the black
The sky looks dead
Call my name
Through the cream
And I'll hear you
Scream again' 1*
On one hand, I was in love with Haruka. Madly in love with her. We were attached. Never before had I met someone with so much dedication, so much passion. A lust for life, you could call it. She gave everything she had to anything she was doing. She took good care of me, and came to my every beckon call. She was beautiful. She was talented. Deep down, she was a good person. I didn't care if the world didn't think so. I knew so. She was an honest to god good person. And I loved her for that.
On the other hand, I could not stand Haruka. I thought she was the good guy. I thought she was a good person deep down. But then again, what kind of good person commits herself to contract killing? It wasn't for me, I know, because she was a killer before we had met. So why was she doing this? She has the money. She has the strength. She has the good heart. She could have anyone she wanted. She could have any * thing * she wanted. And here she was, executing lives like shopping at the grocery store.
But then again… was I any better? I was right beside her, knocking off people. I had blood on my hands too. But I had a purpose. I was doing this because my brother had a penance to pay. I was doing this to protect my family. I was doing this for Mika. My parents. Which made my cause noble, but not right. But atleast I had a cause. A noble cause.
'Stuttering
Cold and damp
Steal the warm wind
Tired friend
Times are gone
For honest men' 1*
And what about Haruka? She had no cause that I knew of. She told me she was an only child, her mother passed away many years ago. She had been taken in by a foster family for about five years, were she got money from an unknown benefactor that did not wish to take her in. Big deal. She had no regrets. No haunting past. So she was doing it just for kicks… to pass the time. And I loved this woman.
By and by, I raised almost 489,000 dollars. All I needed was 11, grand, and I my debt was paid. I sighed. One only made 2,000 off the commission for killing one person. So, I needed to kill an extra person, to make the 11,000. Damn Morioka. I remember talking to Haruka,
"Darling, I need 11,000 dollars."
"Take it out of the bank then."
"Well, you see, dear, my money in the bank is saved for this beautiful beach house I'm saving up to build one day. You know how much I love the beach."
"Yes, I know. In that case, I would more than happy to give you, 11,000."
"No, Haruka, I hate taking your money."
"Well then, my pet, what do you suggest I do?"
"Well, I was thinking Morioka might have some kind of mission in which I can earn it off commission."
"I suppose so. Let me call that bastard."
"Haruka…"
"Sorry, Michiru… I told you, I never cared for that asshole."
"Just don't let him know that, dear."
"As you wish."
As it turns out, Morioka had a very big case on his hands and was more than willing to give Haruka and I the job. It was at a hospital. We were to hunt down and kill one of the head assassins for the 'Dark Shadow' killing agency, as she had killed one of our top agents a couple of weeks before, and was recovering at Clemency Hospital. Haruka insisted that there was probably lots of Shadow Troopers there guarding Melanka, our target, so I would earn my 11 grand and go buy the 'charming Tiffany's bracelet' I wanted. I smiled weakly at Haruka. It's such a pity I'm a good liar.
I remember getting ready for this killing. Haruka had opted for the disguise of a pediatrician. I chose the nurse costume. It was kind of cute… but that wasn't what was on my mind. I remember to have my badge showing, as I smiled at the security guard while entering. He waved at me. Haruka was already up in the maternity ward, doing god knows what. I was on my way to the elevator before I felt a tug on my skirt. I got the nervous feeling in my gut, and fingered my dagger, conveniently stashed in my bra this time. I turned around and met the saddest blue eyes I had ever seen. It was a child, a young boy no older than 4, dressed poor clothing.
"Please miss," He said. "Would you mind sparing some change?"
"Only if you tell me for what…"
"Well," He said rather bashfully. "My mother is having a baby today, and, well, I have nothing to give her. I wanted to buy her a bear from the gift shop, but I don't have enough money. So I was wondering if…" This boy was too adorable to say no to.
"Here…" I handed him twenty dollars. "That ought to buy you the bear, and some candy."
"Oh miss!" He said, giving me a hug. "Thank you! I'll bring you the change… I'll… come back, I'll…" He ran off, before I could tell him that it was not necessary. I hope he doesn't find me, I thought, not giving the matter another thought.
Inikiwa Melenka was staying on the third floor. As I got off the elevator, I could sense enemies all around me. Luciky, I had braided and tied my hair up, hiding the noticeable aqua tresses with the nurse cap, and my tattoo with the gown. I looked like your typical post college working girl. Thank god. Melenka was in poor health, it seems like our agent had not died without a fight. There was several dark business men in there talking to her. I counted 7 of them in the room, including Melenka, herself. I saw 2 more business men with the dragon, (Dark Shadow's icon) on their vests sitting in the waiting room. So there was nine. And then, I saw him. A doctor with a different pair of scrubs then the other doctors. Around his waist, was a baggy set of pediatric pants, but, I could see the outline of a .35mm gun. So, they did have an undercover agent. One of which I could see. So there was 10. Let me find the last one, I prayed silently. Please let their be a last one. I want to be done with this. I want to get this over with and die. I can be free of this…
"Trust in my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die" 2*
It was too late for me to find an 11th victim. Haruka had bolted in with Kaori and Aki at her side.
"Get down!" Aki shouted, holding up her machine gun. The two men sitting in the waiting room took out their guns. Aki blasted the first one away, but unfortunately, the man was able to get a couple of knocks at Kaori before he fell.
"Damn them." Said Haruka, looking at Kaori's body before leaping over tables trying to get to Melenka's room. I looked everywhere for the doctor, but he seemed to have bolted because I could not find him. By the time I had finished my search, Haruka and Aki had already killed Melenka and 4 of her associates, and were working on the final two. I heard someone call the police. Damn. Not much time left. I ripped off my guise and called to them.
"0127! 7899! Police alert!" I approached the room.
"Get down!" Haruka leaped on top of me and brought me down, clearing me of a couple of shots aimed for me.
"7899!" Haruka shouted at Aki. "Hurry!" I heard a loud crash coming from the opposite direction.
"He's almost gone!" Aki shouted from the room. "Don't forget about 0058! I'll be fine."
"Let's go, 0306." Said Haruka, holding me, tightly as we crept back into the waiting room.
"Kaori..." I said softly fingering her silky hair and checking for her pulse. Nothing. I heard footsteps. Everyone one was supposed to be down. Then I saw him.
The doctor. He was staring at me, and reaching for his gun.
"The doctor, Haruka!" Haruka reloaded her gun quickly, as a small child holding a little bit of change in his hand yanked on the doctor's pants.
'Trust in my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die' 2*
"Haruka no!" I cried, scrambling up. Too late. Haruka had hit the assassin, but, on her second round, she hit the boy in the head, aiming for the man's chest. The boy fell back, my change scattering everywhere. Haruka finished off the man without missing a beat. Tears welled in my eyes. A child… an innocent child. Oh I was a horrible person. I could pass for Satan himself. I could have prevented that. And I didn't. Oh I should burn in hell.
"Father, father, father, father
Father into your hands, I commend my spirit
Father into your hands
why have you forsaken me
In your eyes forsaken me
In your thoughts forsaken me
In your heart forsaken, me oh
Trust in my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die" 2*
Aki came and joined us, all bloody and bruised. Haruka had said nothing about the child.
"Death count?" Aki asked.
"10 answered Haruka, not counting our loss."
"11, not counting our loss." I corrected her. She looked confused.
"You killed that child, Haruka."
"Damn kids… okay then, 11 deaths, not including our loss." I looked at Haruka. She smiled at me and touched my cheek. "Looks like Michiru gets her diamonds after all." And then, I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't recognize her anymore. I started to get dizzy. And then I heard a gun lock.
"Going somewhere ladies?" Aki, Haruka, and I turned to the child's body again, where a limping Melenka stood, holding a bloody gun. "Rule number one in contract killing. Always, and I mean fucking always, remember to check if your target is really fucking dead!" She aimed the gun at Haruka.
"Something kinda sad about
the way that things have come to be.
Desensitized to everything.
What became of subtlety?
How can it mean anything to me
If I really don't feel anything at all?" 4*
"No!" I shouted. I grabbed Kaori's lifeless body and picked up the bomb extraordinaire's greatest triumph. A portable bomb, which she conveniently kept in her belt.
"Go now, Haruka!" I shouted. "Leave!" I dove and tackled Melenka, and knocked her out. Before Haruka could manage to get to me, I pushed the bomb button, and it blasted Haruka back, in the direction she came. I managed to escape to higher ground, and leave a lock of my hair behind in the burning hospital. There, as the building began to catch fire, I watched on the roof as Haruka and Aki dashed out of the hospital, looking in every which direction for me, except up. The sky was no place for me… angels belonged up here. This place was not for me… yet.
It was my time to die. Again.
- Fini - Part 1
Black Hole Sun- Sound Garden (1)
Chop Suey!- System of A Down (2)
Sweet Angel- The Toadies (3)
Stinkfist- Tool (4)
Paint it Black- Tour of Duty (5)
Blinded By the Silence of 1,000 Broken Hearts- The Artful Sailor Neptune
I suppose to be able to understand my dire situation you might have to know a little bit about myself and past before you can get the gist of this ordeal.
So here it goes.
I was born on March 6, 1983. I was the middle child of a family of four. It was my older sister, Kasumi, my brother Hiroshi, then I, then my youngest sibling, Mika, who is but 7. My older sister, Kasumi, died at the age of 17, when she was brutally murdered right before my mother, by a mad man who was angry with my father. That man is now behind bars. I lived in fear during my childhood, as I thought something bad would become of me, too.
'I see a red door
And I want it painted black
No colors anymore
I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by
Dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head
Until my darkness goes' 5*
My brother, Hiroshi, was 21 at the time of his death. He was a good man, who had an extraordinary amount of potential to become something good. However, he fell into the wrong hands as he met a man that persuaded him with money and women. He ended up in debt to a man by the name of Indo Morioka, the administrator of the 'black hand'. In fear of dying a horrible death at the will of Indo's assassins, Hiroshi killed himself. He put a gun to his mouth. I was only 17. After his death, I was mute. I was consumed by darkness and I believed that there was nothing good in this world for me. But I swore I would not let Hiroshi's fate interfere with mine or my parents, so I knew what I had to do.
'I see a line of cars
And they're all painted black
With flowers and my love
Both never to come back
I see them turn their heads
Quickly look away
Like a newborn baby
It just happens every day' 5*
Because my parents were so wealthy, they had the investigation close quite quickly. But I know this matter went a lot farther than the police. I discovered from Hiroshi's friends the real reason he killed himself. And I felt no remorse. For if I had been in that position, I would have killed myself, too.
'I look inside my self
And see my heart is black
I see my red door
And I want it painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away
And not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up
When your whole world is black ' 5*
I knew that business with Morioka was not done; and pretty soon he would be after my family for money; or our lives. In order to restore peace and safety to my ill-fated family, I made an appointment with Morioka and bargained my services in return for safety for my family. I was to be an undercover contract killer. I was to become a ninja. My
In order to gain the esteem of Morioka, I had to prove I could be anything our targets wanted to me to be. I cheated, I lied, I stole, and I violated innocent human beings. And I felt dirty.
'I see a red door
And I want it painted black
No colors anymore
I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by
Dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head
Until my darkness goes ' 5*
My parents were to busy mourning the deaths of their children and worrying about the public opinion about them to see the changes in me. I no longer went out with friends. I no longer attended college. I wardrobe was black. And I no longer smiled. Ever. My life was nothing but Indo Morioka. And he was the bane of my existence. The Prince of Darkness himself could not find better ways to torture my soul.
One of the worst things I have endured was finding another head assassin for Morioka. He had heard of a young gangster that was notorious for being smooth, deadly, and under paid.
"Come on, baby." I remember Morioka whispering in my ear while rubbing my thigh. "If you find this guy for me, I guarantee things will be a lot easier on you." I knew I could not ever refuse him. Refusing him meant I was an invalid. And Morioka did not take well with invalids.
"Very well…" I murmured, without a faint sound of distaste in my voice. "I'll find and recruit T'enoh Haruka."
T'enoh Haruka was a young, dashingly handsome, aspiring racer. No one would suspect that one who did so much good for society (i.e. racing for charities) could be someone so bad ( a respected contract killer for the assassin firms). I openly admit that I fell in love with her when I met her. Our first meeting was, well you could say… romantic.
I remember the bar hostess telling me that T'enoh had a thing for young females with white skin. So naturally, I put on the most revealing black dress I owned, pinned my hair up (where my 'black hand' tattoo I had received at my initiation could be seen) and dangerous black heels, the straps spiraling up my thighs. Of course, I had my trusty dagger stuck in my black panties, just in case T'enoh could not be trusted. I covered my face with so much makeup, no one would recognize me. I remember running my hands up my body. I was horribly thin, due to the fact of my depression and lack of appetite. But luckily, I had the white skin of a child, and blue piercing eyes.
When the time was right, I strode into the bar, with another woman holding my hand. I made sure I had everyone's attention on myself and my date, Kaori, (the bomb extraordinaire for the 'black hand') as I made my move. I began to stroke Kaori's dark, flawless face while smirking at the charming blonde that was staring our way. I recognized T'enoh Haruka just by the way she was sitting, wearing a black duster and a sleek black belt holding a 6. mm gun. She had a foxish look about her. She has been sitting with a blonde girl, with legs that went on for miles, but instead at staring at her companion, her eyes were locked with mine. I took Kaori's face in my hands and began to kiss her face passionately, as she began to rub up against me. I almost burst out laughing watching Haruka's face, desire written all over it. I gently whispered in Kaori's ear to get our plan into motion. I reached up and gently fingered my diamond stud on my left ear. Automatically, another very attractive woman, (Aki, from the Genocide Sector of the Black Hand) came and sat on the other side of me and began talking. Kaori rose from her seat and gently licked my cheek, before slithering off, in search of Haruka's date. Seeing how my date had left me, Haruka the automatically stood up and advanced over to me.
'No more will my green sea
Go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee
This thing happening to you.
If I look hard enough
Into the setting sun,
My love will laugh with me
Before the morning comes' 5*
"You're beautiful…"
"Your point?"
"I must have you."
"Quite the contrary I must have you." She laughed. Aki stood up and left.
"Oh really?"
"Indeed. As you know nothing about me, I know everything there is to know about you, 0127 Agent T'enoh."
"That's not true."
"What part?" Haruka reached up and grabbed the nape of my neck. I reached down for my dagger…
"The part about me knowing nothing about you." Haruka began to finger my tattoo. "You're a 'black hand' agent aren't you?" I relaxed and dropped my hands to my sides. "0306 Agent Kaioh Michiru."
"Yes." She took both my hands and held them firmly.
"And you're here for me, aren't you?" I nodded, pursing my lips. Haruka's firm expression softened, then she whirled her gun up and held it to my throat. "And what makes you think you can have me?" I was taken by surprise and unarmed. Shit.
"We have powerful associates. We will pay you…"
"How much?"
"How ever much you want." Haruka looked thoughtfully at Kaori, whom was dancing with her date.
"That's not enough. But, I'll tell you what," She said, returning her gun to her holster. "I'll join, just as long as I get to work with you."
"Me?" I asked. "I'm not for sale."
"Well there isn't enough money in this world to get me to work for Morioka." She said, signaling the hostess.
"But you said…"
"I wasn't finished." She said sharply. "I said there isn't enough money in this world to get me to work for Morioka. But, there is you." She smiled the most picturesque smile the world had ever seen before downing a vodka tonic.
I look inside my self
See my heart is back
I see my red door
And I want it painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away
And not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up
When your whole world is black 5*
Haruka said, to prove my loyalty, I was to come home with her that night, and in the morning (after breakfast of course) we would go together to sign the contract with Morioka. Because my job was on the line, (and Haruka was simply gorgeous) I agreed.
'Make up your mind.
Decide to walk with me,
Around the lake tonight.
Around the lake tonight…
By my side.
By my side….' 3*
It was pitch dark in her apartment. After I stepped inside, she slammed the door and locked it. She did not turn on a light. I turned around.
'I'm not gonna lie…
I'll not be a gentleman,
Behind the boathouse,
I'll show you my dark secret…' 3*
"Haruka?" I heard her unsheathe a knife. My heart froze. I closed my eyes and said my prayers. I opened my eyes in shock when I heard the knife swipe close to me quickly. Suddenly, my dress fell from my body. And the lights flickered on.
'Don't be afraid,
I don't mean to scare you,
So help me,
Jesus…' 3*
"Scared?"
"No… I was just wondering what the hell you are doing." Haruka looked down at my lingerie. She eyed the dagger.
"Do you always dress this dangerously?" I laughed.
"Only when I plan on meeting dangerous people." Haruka's face turned grim and she came close to my face. She reached down and pulled the dagger from my panties and dropped it to the floor.
"Consider me no danger to you, Michiru." Before I could open my mouth, Haruka took my face in her hands and kissed me, with a long, passionate kiss. I instantly felt at ease.
'I'm not gonna lie…
I want you for mine.
My flesh and blood.
My lover, be my lover yeah.' 3*
I pulled away from the kiss, and looked at Haruka coyly. I had never been kissed like that.
"Why are you doing this?" Haruka smiled, a soft, sexy smile, and took my hand, and let me to her lavish bed room. She quietly dimmed the lights and slipped behind me.
"Because you're the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen." Haruka said, whispering in my ear. "You, who have the innocent look of a child can be an assassin, and understand why I'm doing this. You won't think any less of me. We're together in this. And I trust you." Haruka spun me around, and I faced her, with a serious expression. She wasn't lying. "You're an angel of mercy in a city of darkness." She said, quite seriously. She brought me closer, and her immaculate beauty overcame me. "You're the girl I've always dreamed of meeting; a woman who will love me even though I take the lives of others. Because she does the same. We're the same. I can feel it, Michiru. We belong together. Do you feel it?" I was silent for a moment. Finally, I took a deep breath and prepared to answer her question.
'Father into your hands, I commend my spirit
Father into your hands
why have you forsaken me
In your eyes forsaken me
In your thoughts forsaken me
In your heart forsaken?' 2*
At that moment, God had taken the ability for me to say no. I did not possess the power to decline Haruka's offer. I could not. True, I had amazing feelings for her, but, the part about taking the lives of others. I did not want to do this. This was not my passion. I was saving my family. I was saving our name. I could not tell her this, no, not now. So, it seems like God had decided my fate.
"Hang my head,
Drown my fear,
Till you all just disappear." 1*
"I feel it, Haruka." I said, fulfilling my every desire by bringing her lips to mine. There, that kiss was it. That kiss formed a bond between us. Was it love? I could not say. But whatever it was, it was strong. It connected us. To me, it was passion, strength, jealousy, anger, and neediness all mixed up together in a feverish haze of kissing, touching, and thrusting. I had never made love like that before. And Haruka could tell,
'Finger deep within the borderline.
Show me that you love me and that we belong together.
Relax, turn around and take my hand. ' 4*
"Haruka!"
"Ohh, take is easy Michiru."
"It… it… it…"
"That's perfectly natural, Michiru. Just relax."
"I… I… I… it feels so good..."
"It's supposed to, darling."
"Please…. don't stop."
"The thought had not even crossed my mind."
'Knuckle deep inside the borderline.
This may hurt a little but it's something you'll get used to.
Relax. Slip away.' 4*
I remember crying out in sheer pain. A good kind of pain. Haruka wasn't used to laying with virgins, so was a little rough. I remember dozing off soon afterwards. But not soon enough to hear Haruka having a word with her private god.
"Well I promise you,
I will treat you well,
My sweet angel,
So help me,
Jesus." 3*
"God…? if there is a god… if there is a god that will ever listen to my pleas… I've found… I've found the only girl for me. And if you would… protect her from all the bad, protect her from harm. I beseech you, just give me this one thing." And Haruka wrapped her strong arms around me, and went to sleep. As did I.
'I,
Cry,
When angels deserve to die." 2 *
Damn, damn, damn, damn. I fell victim to her passion. I fell victim to her ways. I fell victim to her faith. Her everlasting faith. The faith she had in us that kept us together. I died the day Haruka signed a full contract with Morioka. My soul died. My spirit died. My pursuit of happiness failed. Haruka dedicated her life to taking other's. And it wasn't right. But she was right. We were in this together. And I hated myself.
Everyday for the following year we set out in search of new victims, new clients, new enemies. Everyday, we took a life. And it always shocked me when Haruka was would grow excited killing a victim. She'd get carried away. She's stab and stab and stab… and the blood, oh the blood. I smelled it on me, I smelled it on her as she kissed me after a job well done. I didn't know how much longer I could go on living like this. But I didn't know what to do. I was so confused. So, confused.
'Indisposed
In disguise
As no one knows
Hides the face
Lies the snake
The sun
In my disgrace
Boiling heat
Summer stanch
'Neath the black
The sky looks dead
Call my name
Through the cream
And I'll hear you
Scream again' 1*
On one hand, I was in love with Haruka. Madly in love with her. We were attached. Never before had I met someone with so much dedication, so much passion. A lust for life, you could call it. She gave everything she had to anything she was doing. She took good care of me, and came to my every beckon call. She was beautiful. She was talented. Deep down, she was a good person. I didn't care if the world didn't think so. I knew so. She was an honest to god good person. And I loved her for that.
On the other hand, I could not stand Haruka. I thought she was the good guy. I thought she was a good person deep down. But then again, what kind of good person commits herself to contract killing? It wasn't for me, I know, because she was a killer before we had met. So why was she doing this? She has the money. She has the strength. She has the good heart. She could have anyone she wanted. She could have any * thing * she wanted. And here she was, executing lives like shopping at the grocery store.
But then again… was I any better? I was right beside her, knocking off people. I had blood on my hands too. But I had a purpose. I was doing this because my brother had a penance to pay. I was doing this to protect my family. I was doing this for Mika. My parents. Which made my cause noble, but not right. But atleast I had a cause. A noble cause.
'Stuttering
Cold and damp
Steal the warm wind
Tired friend
Times are gone
For honest men' 1*
And what about Haruka? She had no cause that I knew of. She told me she was an only child, her mother passed away many years ago. She had been taken in by a foster family for about five years, were she got money from an unknown benefactor that did not wish to take her in. Big deal. She had no regrets. No haunting past. So she was doing it just for kicks… to pass the time. And I loved this woman.
By and by, I raised almost 489,000 dollars. All I needed was 11, grand, and I my debt was paid. I sighed. One only made 2,000 off the commission for killing one person. So, I needed to kill an extra person, to make the 11,000. Damn Morioka. I remember talking to Haruka,
"Darling, I need 11,000 dollars."
"Take it out of the bank then."
"Well, you see, dear, my money in the bank is saved for this beautiful beach house I'm saving up to build one day. You know how much I love the beach."
"Yes, I know. In that case, I would more than happy to give you, 11,000."
"No, Haruka, I hate taking your money."
"Well then, my pet, what do you suggest I do?"
"Well, I was thinking Morioka might have some kind of mission in which I can earn it off commission."
"I suppose so. Let me call that bastard."
"Haruka…"
"Sorry, Michiru… I told you, I never cared for that asshole."
"Just don't let him know that, dear."
"As you wish."
As it turns out, Morioka had a very big case on his hands and was more than willing to give Haruka and I the job. It was at a hospital. We were to hunt down and kill one of the head assassins for the 'Dark Shadow' killing agency, as she had killed one of our top agents a couple of weeks before, and was recovering at Clemency Hospital. Haruka insisted that there was probably lots of Shadow Troopers there guarding Melanka, our target, so I would earn my 11 grand and go buy the 'charming Tiffany's bracelet' I wanted. I smiled weakly at Haruka. It's such a pity I'm a good liar.
I remember getting ready for this killing. Haruka had opted for the disguise of a pediatrician. I chose the nurse costume. It was kind of cute… but that wasn't what was on my mind. I remember to have my badge showing, as I smiled at the security guard while entering. He waved at me. Haruka was already up in the maternity ward, doing god knows what. I was on my way to the elevator before I felt a tug on my skirt. I got the nervous feeling in my gut, and fingered my dagger, conveniently stashed in my bra this time. I turned around and met the saddest blue eyes I had ever seen. It was a child, a young boy no older than 4, dressed poor clothing.
"Please miss," He said. "Would you mind sparing some change?"
"Only if you tell me for what…"
"Well," He said rather bashfully. "My mother is having a baby today, and, well, I have nothing to give her. I wanted to buy her a bear from the gift shop, but I don't have enough money. So I was wondering if…" This boy was too adorable to say no to.
"Here…" I handed him twenty dollars. "That ought to buy you the bear, and some candy."
"Oh miss!" He said, giving me a hug. "Thank you! I'll bring you the change… I'll… come back, I'll…" He ran off, before I could tell him that it was not necessary. I hope he doesn't find me, I thought, not giving the matter another thought.
Inikiwa Melenka was staying on the third floor. As I got off the elevator, I could sense enemies all around me. Luciky, I had braided and tied my hair up, hiding the noticeable aqua tresses with the nurse cap, and my tattoo with the gown. I looked like your typical post college working girl. Thank god. Melenka was in poor health, it seems like our agent had not died without a fight. There was several dark business men in there talking to her. I counted 7 of them in the room, including Melenka, herself. I saw 2 more business men with the dragon, (Dark Shadow's icon) on their vests sitting in the waiting room. So there was nine. And then, I saw him. A doctor with a different pair of scrubs then the other doctors. Around his waist, was a baggy set of pediatric pants, but, I could see the outline of a .35mm gun. So, they did have an undercover agent. One of which I could see. So there was 10. Let me find the last one, I prayed silently. Please let their be a last one. I want to be done with this. I want to get this over with and die. I can be free of this…
"Trust in my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die" 2*
It was too late for me to find an 11th victim. Haruka had bolted in with Kaori and Aki at her side.
"Get down!" Aki shouted, holding up her machine gun. The two men sitting in the waiting room took out their guns. Aki blasted the first one away, but unfortunately, the man was able to get a couple of knocks at Kaori before he fell.
"Damn them." Said Haruka, looking at Kaori's body before leaping over tables trying to get to Melenka's room. I looked everywhere for the doctor, but he seemed to have bolted because I could not find him. By the time I had finished my search, Haruka and Aki had already killed Melenka and 4 of her associates, and were working on the final two. I heard someone call the police. Damn. Not much time left. I ripped off my guise and called to them.
"0127! 7899! Police alert!" I approached the room.
"Get down!" Haruka leaped on top of me and brought me down, clearing me of a couple of shots aimed for me.
"7899!" Haruka shouted at Aki. "Hurry!" I heard a loud crash coming from the opposite direction.
"He's almost gone!" Aki shouted from the room. "Don't forget about 0058! I'll be fine."
"Let's go, 0306." Said Haruka, holding me, tightly as we crept back into the waiting room.
"Kaori..." I said softly fingering her silky hair and checking for her pulse. Nothing. I heard footsteps. Everyone one was supposed to be down. Then I saw him.
The doctor. He was staring at me, and reaching for his gun.
"The doctor, Haruka!" Haruka reloaded her gun quickly, as a small child holding a little bit of change in his hand yanked on the doctor's pants.
'Trust in my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die' 2*
"Haruka no!" I cried, scrambling up. Too late. Haruka had hit the assassin, but, on her second round, she hit the boy in the head, aiming for the man's chest. The boy fell back, my change scattering everywhere. Haruka finished off the man without missing a beat. Tears welled in my eyes. A child… an innocent child. Oh I was a horrible person. I could pass for Satan himself. I could have prevented that. And I didn't. Oh I should burn in hell.
"Father, father, father, father
Father into your hands, I commend my spirit
Father into your hands
why have you forsaken me
In your eyes forsaken me
In your thoughts forsaken me
In your heart forsaken, me oh
Trust in my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my self righteous suicide
I, cry, when angels deserve to die" 2*
Aki came and joined us, all bloody and bruised. Haruka had said nothing about the child.
"Death count?" Aki asked.
"10 answered Haruka, not counting our loss."
"11, not counting our loss." I corrected her. She looked confused.
"You killed that child, Haruka."
"Damn kids… okay then, 11 deaths, not including our loss." I looked at Haruka. She smiled at me and touched my cheek. "Looks like Michiru gets her diamonds after all." And then, I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't recognize her anymore. I started to get dizzy. And then I heard a gun lock.
"Going somewhere ladies?" Aki, Haruka, and I turned to the child's body again, where a limping Melenka stood, holding a bloody gun. "Rule number one in contract killing. Always, and I mean fucking always, remember to check if your target is really fucking dead!" She aimed the gun at Haruka.
"Something kinda sad about
the way that things have come to be.
Desensitized to everything.
What became of subtlety?
How can it mean anything to me
If I really don't feel anything at all?" 4*
"No!" I shouted. I grabbed Kaori's lifeless body and picked up the bomb extraordinaire's greatest triumph. A portable bomb, which she conveniently kept in her belt.
"Go now, Haruka!" I shouted. "Leave!" I dove and tackled Melenka, and knocked her out. Before Haruka could manage to get to me, I pushed the bomb button, and it blasted Haruka back, in the direction she came. I managed to escape to higher ground, and leave a lock of my hair behind in the burning hospital. There, as the building began to catch fire, I watched on the roof as Haruka and Aki dashed out of the hospital, looking in every which direction for me, except up. The sky was no place for me… angels belonged up here. This place was not for me… yet.
It was my time to die. Again.
- Fini - Part 1