'An Irish Goodbye'
---
Summary: A series of perspectives on the departure of Mike Logan, the arrest of Colin Ledger, and the changes in the Major Case Squad at the end of Season 7.
Spoiler alerts for seasons 6 and 7, along with allusions to season 8. Set after 'Last Rites' and shortly before 'Rock Star'.
---
Wheeler
---
"Are you alright?"
Megan really hated that question. It was always asked when she clearly not 'alright', and the acceptable answer in polite company was: "Oh, I'm fine. Don't mind me."
Her brother had called after hearing about Colin's arrest on the nine o'clock news and asked the dreaded question. To his credit, Paul had offered to kill her now ex-fiancée immediately before he asked, so she wasn't exactly angry at him.
"No, I'm not okay," she'd answered in a whisper. In the safety of her apartment's cozy living room, she let herself cry.
"Do you want me to come over?" Paul asked, concern evident in his tone. He was the inveterate bachelor of the family, and usually lived alone. Her sister, Kate, already had a teenage son, young daughter, and happy marriage to her name.
"No," Megan replied in a stronger tone. "Mom already offered, and I just--"
She broke off and took a deep, steadying breath. Her brother keep quiet, letting her catch her breath and regain her composure. "I just need to be alone."
"I'll come over for dinner tomorrow," he offered. "Pick you up from work and just have a quiet night in."
"Well--"
"I'll even buy dinner and let you watch whatever sappy movie you want."
Megan laughed through her tears. Her brother always had a gentle, silly way of making her feel better. "It's Friday. Don't you have anything better to do."
"Not when I have an upset sister," he assured her. "Chinese or Italian?"
She thought. "Italian. I'll meet you outside at two-thirty."
Paul said his goodbyes and left her alone in her apartment. She still felt numb from what Logan had told her at Hartigan's. He had picked the absolute worse time to retire. Now, she had to face the additional headache of a new partner. She dragged herself into bed, and fell asleep almost immediately, still in her work clothes.
---
Megan noticed the sun glaring off her engagement ring the next morning. To her, the large carat stone and silver band looked ridiculous. She tucked away the ring in a dusty corner of a dresser drawer. It looked more appropriate there.
She dragged herself into the bathroom and cried under the jets of her shower. The warmth of the water eased away the tension in her muscles and delayed the inevitable pounding in her temples. Afterwards, she looked pale and drawn in the vanity mirror. Somehow, her vanity wasn't very important anymore.
The news program on the radio in her tiny kitchen had a brief story about the arrest of a prominent banker. She nearly dropped her coffee mug before regaining her composure.
"No news, then," she muttered, grabbing a granola bar and her travel mug before heading out the door.
It was almost a relief to get in the car and pound on the accelerator. She was a sensible driver on most occasions, which Logan and Colin both had hated. Today, traffic laws got thrown out the window, and she reached One Police Plaza in record time.
The stares and whispers began in the lobby. Megan groaned quietly and punched the UP button for the elevator. The silence when she walked into the elevator and into the squadroom confirmed that today would not be a good day.
"Morning, Megan," one of secretaries, Gina, chirped when she walked in. "You doing alright?"
She ignored the question and headed for her desk. Her dismissal of Gina seemed to double the scrutiny of the squad. She wanted to cry again at the sight of Logan's empty desk but concentrated on her emails once more. After fifteen minutes of staring at the same email, Megan snapped her laptop shut and stood up from the pile of work on her desk.
"This is ridiculous."
"Hey, Megan," a voice interrupted from behind her. Eames looked at her with genuine compassion and worry, which was a relief. "I just heard about Logan. And--"
"Yeah," she felt compelled to interrupt before Colin was mentioned. She shrugged. "Can't seem to keep anyone around."
She tried to sound unconcerned, but her voice quavered. Alex didn't say a word and wrapped her arms around Megan instead. The younger woman choked back a sob.
"I am so sorry," Eames murmured in her ear. "It's tough to lose people like that."
Megan pulled away gently, wiping her eyes with her sleeves. She felt marginally better. "Thanks."
"Anytime," the older woman replied with a small smile. "Wanna grab coffee?"
"I'm good."
"If you're sure. Let me know if I can do anything for you."
She nodded and let Alex return to her work and her coffee. Her muscles felt oddly stiff as she stretched them out at her desk. Luckily, most of the work had already been done in the case. She just had to forward the case file to the new ADA handling the case, and then she would be done. She reopened her laptop.
Not ten minutes into her email to ADA Herrington, the captain's office door opened. "Wheeler."
Megan closed her eyes and sighed. "Coming, sir."
Ross was shuffling papers when she finally worked up the energy to walk into the office, close the door, and sit down in front of the desk. He looked up. "You look like hell."
"Really? I hadn't noticed."
He raised an eyebrow at her angry tone. "Would you prefer that I sugarcoat my concerns?"
"I really don't want to have this conversation," she answered.
"You don't know what I called you in for."
"I can guess," Megan retorted.
The captain sighed. He handed her two newspaper clippings. "Is there a reason you didn't tell me about your fiancée getting arrested at the airport yesterday morning?"
She closed her eyes and set the clippings back on the desk. "I didn't want to talk about it."
"You could have at least clued me in," he continued gently, "instead of letting the six o'clock news tell me."
"I don't want to talk about it," she repeated vehemently. "God, does no one get that message?"
Ross didn't answer for a moment. "You can't blame me for being concerned."
Megan laughed bitterly. "Yes, everyone is concerned. Concerned and wants to know details. If you were honestly concerned about me, then you would have told Logan to wait a couple of days before walking out of here."
"I didn't have a choice with Logan. It was either accept his resignation or let the brass fire him."
She nodded and kept quiet. It wasn't exactly a shock that the brass had been gunning for Logan after the newspaper expose on Terri Driver's misconduct.
"You should take the rest of the day off," Ross suggested. "Just work from home."
"No. You know that will make the gossiping worse around here," she replied, shaking her head. "I need to finish up the case. Then, I will go home and take tomorrow off."
He nodded. "Fine."
"Am I dismissed?"
"One more thing: Human Resources has started considering a replacement. You'll be reassigned by next week or the week after that."
She turned back to him. "And?"
"Just giving you a heads up." The captain shrugged. "Eliminate surprises."
Megan wondered if he expected gratitude for his announcement. "Guess I have something to look forward to, then."
---
The event Megan was really looking forward to finally came. She threw her laptop into its traveling case and walked out of the squad room with a relieved sigh. The hands of the clock at two-thirty and the sight of her brother's black SUV never looked so good to her.
"Hey," she greeted her brother as she slipped into the passenger seat. "Guess what?"
"Do I want to guess?"
"I hate my life."
He shook his head. "Yep. Best not to guess."
Megan slumped down in her seat. "Why did I even get this morning? I mean, I should have stayed home, watched sappy movies, and cried."
"Well, you can do that now. You're certainly not going to work tomorrow, are you?" Paul asked.
"No. I'm taking a day off. Not much to do anyway," she replied with a shrug.
Her brother gave a her a sympathetic look and ran a hand through his brown hair. "Kate said she'd come over a little later."
Megan smiled. "She doesn't have to do that."
"I think Mom offered to babysit those monkey children of hers, so she's free."
"Now I feel like a charity case," she grumbled.
"Come on," he replied, rolling his blue eyes. "We're family. We ask a million questions and we'll eat all your food. And, at the end of the day, we'll make you feel better."
Megan felt the hidden sadness in her chest well up at his kind words. "If you put it that way--"
Paul looked over at her in alarm. "Don't you dare cry. I have enough to deal with in traffic."
She laughed and smacked his shoulder playfully. "You big baby."
They rode the rest of the way, joking and laughing about Paul's deplorable driving and Megan's secret desire to shoot a good chunk of the Major Case Squad. By the time they pulled up outside her apartment building, Megan was genuinely smiling for the first time that day, which was a huge step in the right direction.
"Hey, Meg?" Paul's voice brought her back to the present. "Feeling better?"
She looked at him and nodded. That was the right question.
---
Author's Note:
A bit of longer chapter because I wanted to expand Megan's reaction to everything. I was disappointed that Criminal Intent didn't give us any transition on her feelings from Season 7 to 8.
Additionally, I completely made up Wheeler's family history and names. We know from Season 8 that she has a sister, and I always felt like she would have a brother. Season 6 mentions her mother, so that's completely canon.
