A/N- So, I know I kind of set this up at the end of the last part...so here is what spilled out of my addled brain.
New year.
"Can I get anyone another drink?" Gillian called merrily. "No? Well, that's the last time I'm offering, you can all just help yourselves from now on!" She toasted as she took a swig from her large wine glass.
Caroline flashed her another dirty look and she pretended not to notice as she felt Robbie appear behind her and fold his arms around her small waist.
"Shall we change the music?" He suggested, looking around at the face's of the quiet gathering. Gillian nodded up at him gratefully.
Christmas had come together so nicely, everyone still on a high from the wedding and getting on so well, she had been riding on this wave of happiness when she had suggested a party at the farm, well, that, her night with Robbie and a half bottle of the expensive bubbles that Caroline had been topping them up with all day. Right now it seemed a lot like a bad idea.
Caroline sat quietly giving her evils, due Gillian supposed to her arriving to see Robbie looking quite at home. Gillian purposely hadn't mentioned that he would be an addition to their group. Kate was quietly beside her, whether she sensed Caroline's tension or was just tired and sick of drinking orange juice while everyone got festively toasted, Gillian wasn't sure.
William and his girlfriend were completely at ease but also very wrapped up in each other, as was the way with young love Gillian thought wistfully, bringing her back to thoughts of Robbie and how they had felt the first time around. Ellie and Raff on the other hand had clearly had a row, something to do with Ellie's mam not having Calamity over night so they could enjoy themselves and being that Calamity had been at the farm all over Christmas, Gillian could see why Raff would be annoyed.
At least Gillian's dad and her new mother in-law seemed happy enough, giggling into each other almost as much as William and Roxy, and again Gillian was glad she had Robbie here, it would be no fun being the only one not in a couple. She didn't blame Laurence for opting to go to his mates house, especially not with the way things were going so far.
Robbie was messing with the stereo and suddenly Elton John filled the room singing about "Still standing!" Gillian looked questioningly at Robbie and he shrugged looking hopeful. Gillian would just have to ensure that she wasn't Still Standing at the end of the night, and if she could avoid being alone with Caroline, all the better.
Xxxx
"I see that you have taken absolutely no notice of anything I have said regarding your relationship with Robbie?" Caroline said at Gillian's shoulder as she re-filled her glass.
Gillian closed her eyes. Shit. She had wandered into the kitchen alone and left herself open for this. Caroline had just been waiting for her moment to strike.
"Caroline...Caroline..." Gillian began. "I appreciate the concern, I really do." Gillian said putting an arm around Caroline's neck and bumping against her accidentality. "You are quite tall." She said frowning, almost on her tip toes now and swaying a little.
"That's beside the point. I thought you were going to knock things on the head with Robbie? It looks like things are very much back on." Caroline said, serious disapproval in her voice. If she hadn't been so annoyed she probably would have giving up on discussing this with a drunken Gillian but as it was,she continued. "It can only end badly...again...you know that really! Are you trying to get yourself in trouble, is that what this is? You think you deserve punishment?!"
"No!" Gillian said, sobering just a little. Just enough. "No, I think I deserve a bit of love!"
Kate appeared, leaning in the doorway and watching Gillian sway against Caroline and put a hand up to her cheek.
"Don't be cross with me Caroline!" She pleaded with a pout.
"Are you two okay?" Kate asked then.
"Aww Kate! Lovely Kate!" Gillian called too loudly. "Do you know how lucky you are Kate? Almost as lucky as our Caroline!" Gillian giggled, looking from one woman to the other expecting them to share in her joke. "Tough crowd." She mumbled as she stumbled out of the kitchen.
"What was all that about?" Kate asked, not moving from her place at the door.
"She's just pissed." Caroline shrugged.
"And you giving her and Robbie daggers all night is what?" Kate asked shortly.
Caroline's brows shot skywards, she didn't think she was quite so transparent. "I just don't think they are a great match, that's all."
Kate remained tight lipped. "You're a shit liar Caroline, which is ironic considering how long you've spent lying to yourself." Kate said through her teeth.
"What? I'm sorry Kate, I don't like the two of them together, I have my reasons." Caroline said, moving toward Kate and taking her hands as she reached her and pulled her slightly into the room, away from the view of the others.
"Did something happen between the two of you?" Kate asked.
"What!? Are you kidding?Gillian? And me?" Caroline was gobsmacked.
"Well, the two of you are best buddys one minute and then glaring at each other the next, then I find you having secret discussions, you suddenly hate her boyfriend, who seems very nice, as far as I can tell." Kate reeled off.
"And you're jealous?!" Caroline grinned. It hadn't even occurred to her that Kate could think anything like that.
"Well, try not to look so pleased about it!" Kate said sulkily as Caroline wrapped both arms around her waist now and pulled her in, Kate's bump dictating just how close she could get.
"Sorry, it's just...ridiculous to think that I could look at any other woman like that when I have you." Caroline said kissing Kate's cheek and then dropping small kisses down her neck and along her collar bone.
Kate smiled in spite of her earlier concern and let herself revel in her girlfriends touch, until a crashing sound from outside, followed by a heavy thudding at the door got everyone's attention.
"Were we expecting anyone else?" Kate asked Caroline, who shrugged a reply and then froze as she heard the familiar voice at the door.
"John!" She sighed unhappily.
"Hello everybody!" He called, slurring slightly. "What a lovely gathering...I think my invite must have been lost in the post. Well, it has been Christmas and the Royal Mail is rushed off it's feet, no matter! I am here now!" He announced.
Caroline wanted to stay hidden in the kitchen, Kate in her arms, yet for whatever reason she still felt some strange misplaced sense of responsibility for the man and for inflicting him upon everyone else.
"What the hell are you doing here?" She demanded as she appeared before him.
"Ah, my devoted wife!" John said.
"Ex-wife." Kate mumbled to herself.
"You're all here!" John said spreading his arms wide. "I just thought, who better to see this year out with, than everyone who has helped make it, by far, the worst of my life!"
"Dad!" William said as a warning, stepping in front of his father. "You shouldn't be here."
"Really? Son, stay out of this, I am not here to cause trouble..."
"Not much!" Celia interrupted.
"Why shouldn't I be here? I have a few things to get off my chest before I can start a fresh in 2014." John said cheerfully.
"John, you can have one drink and then I want you to leave alright? I'll call you a cab." Gillian proposed.
"On New Years Eve? That'll cost him a fortune." Raff said helpfully.
"I'll pay." Caroline offered. "Anything to get rid."
"Oh yes, Money was always power with you wasn't it?" John shot with distaste.
"On second thought, he can sleep in the field." Caroline said, turning her back slightly and stepping closer to Kate, placing one arm around her to settle on her hip protectively.
"And her!" John pointed to Kate now. "Pathetic, like a dog picking at the scraps of my life!" He accused.
William put a hand on his Fathers shoulder now. "Dad, don't ever speak to Kate like that."
"Or what? " John said with only a little less enthusiasm.
"Or you will be the first man who ever causes me to use physical violence and I really don't want that." William said in earnest.
"Oh really... well... I am going anyway this party is about as lively as a funeral! John told the room.
Gillian moved toward him now. "Where are you gonna go?" She asked.
"Who cares?" Celia sniped.
"I don't want to stumble upon his frozen corpse on my farm in the morning." Gillian reasoned.
"He could stay in the van." Raff suggested.
"Van?" Kate asked, wondering if she had missed something.
"Yeh, there's a old caravan in the far field, some lads used it over the summer then just dumped it. It's alright though, bit of a mess since the hens got in in one day but...if he had a sleeping bag and a flask of tea..."
"You think he'd be alright in there?" Gillian asked.
"It's been a mild month so far, am sure he wouldn't freeze." Alan added. "I've a hot water bottle he could borrow."
"I am standing here!" John yelled suddenly.
"Well, what else are you going to do?" Gillian asked.
Kate giggled as Caroline whispered something into her ear.
Roxy suddenly touched Williams arm. "Happy new year!" She said with a sweet smile and everyone turned to the T.V which had been muted a while ago but on which you could see the firework display in London, the illuminated London eye centre stage and the camera now moving to the face of Big Ben with his hand's firmly pointed at midnight.
"Happy New Year!" Each of them called as they took turns to embrace.
William eventually turned to embrace his Dad, who was standing looking awkward and pathetic, as his son patted him on the shoulder. "Let's hope you can be less of an idiot this year!" He said.
Xxx
The boys had taken John over to the caravan with fuel to start a small fire and Caroline suspected that all three of them were a little excited at the prospect. Celia and Alan had gone to bed not long after they had seen in the New Year as had Roxy and Kate. Robbie had gone out to check on things, whatever that meant, and Caroline had promised to help Gillian clear up just a little before she joined Kate. Kate's condition being what it was, they had been given first dibs on the double bed and the others were making do with various couches and air beds.
"Gillian..."
"Caroline?"
"You have had a lot of...y'know...sex?" She mouthed the word quietly.
"Have I?!" Gillian asked in mock shock.
"Well, you slept with three men that I know of since I met you, one of them being my husban..."
Gillian put up a halting hand. "Okay, okay, I get the point."
"So, that is a lot relatively speaking... I mean...relative to say...me." Caroline said avoiding Gillian's curious look.
"Well, I take it you were faithful to John throughout the marriage?" Gillian checked.
Caroline answered with an incredulous look and Gillian nodded knowingly. "Okay...but before that, you must have, you know? Played the field a bit? You were at University weren't you? I thought that 50% of the time is spent shagging?"
Caroline smiled. "Not by me. I studied hard." She said proudly.
Gillian was quiet, trying to imagine a young studious Caroline and smiling to herself.
"There was someone, for a little while, a girlfriend." Caroline confessed.
Gillian grinned, pleased to think that Caroline had had some love in her life back then. "What happened?"
"Oh, she broke my heart. We were young, it was...all very dramatic."Caroline sighed. "Anyway, that wasn't the point. I was trying to illustrate the point that my experience with..."
"Sex?" Gillian supplied.
Caroline nodded, colouring a little. "It's not vast."
Gillian shrugged. "I think it's one of those things where it's quality not quantity that counts Caroline."
"But that's the thing." The blonde said now, real concern etched into her face. "How do you know...if it's good...if you are...good at it?"
Gillian frowned as realisation dawned on her. "Oh, I see. Well, I suppose you just know...you can tell...I mean, with blokes...It's pretty easy to tell." Gillian touched a hand to Caroline's forearm reassuringly. "You're not worried about that are you?"
Caroline shook her head. "Noooooooh...The night of the wedding was ...good, it was bloody amazing...the best I've ever... And I'm sure it was for her..."
Gillian grinned as Caroline trailed off. "Well there you go then..."
"But since then...we haven't..." Caroline shifted. "We have spent all week together and it has been fantastic...romantic...but we haven't...again and I have wanted to but..."
"It's only been a week Caroline, and it's a big week, it's busy, everyone's knackered and she's pregnant, she'll be more knackered than the rest of us."
Caroline nodded. "I know, your right...I'm being silly, I just thought we'd be making up for lost time and I just really hope I don't get anything wrong this time, I can't afford to screw this up again."
"Then talk to her." Gillian said. "Stop trying to read her mind, stop worrying about making yourself vulnerable to her and tell her how you feel."
Caroline smiled and nodded.
"In fact...that would be a great New Year resolution." Gillian said with a brilliant smile.
Xxxx
"Kate?" Caroline whispered as she slid in to bed to spoon her girlfriend. "Are you awake?"
"Yes." Sighed Kate. "I can't get comfortable."
Caroline snuggled more closely into Kate and pulled the taller woman back a little so that Caroline was propping her up like a human cushion. It was a position that they had negotiated over the last week as the most comfortable for Kate to sleep in. Caroline draped her arm over Kate and placed her palm softly against the firm bump of her pregnant tummy.
"Kate?" Caroline asked after another moment of silence.
"Hmmm?" Came the sleepy reply.
"I wanted to ask you something." Caroline ventured.
"Yeah?" Kate yawned now.
"When we...before,when we were together...before...I mean not the first time...because that was clearly... Amazing! ... But the rest of the time...was it Okay? Did you ...y'know...enjoy it?" Caroline blundered.
"Caroline? What are you talking about?" Kate asked simply.
"Y'know...me...was I alright? Sexually?Did I perform, or is it something I need to work on...because that would be an option... I could read up on...techniques..." Caroline continued.
Kate shifted awkwardly until she had turned in Caroline's arms and was facing her now.
"What on earth makes you ask that?" Kate said her brow crinkling.
Caroline turned pink, it was easier to have this conversation without those eyes looking over at her.
"Well...when we split up...the weekend it ended...in our last conversation you said that it had never really gotten started and that it was only ever a couple of embarrassed fumbles." Caroline explained reasonably.
Kate's slightly amused look of slight concern was replaced by one of absolute anguish.
"Caroline!" Kate exclaimed, putting one hand up to her cheek. "I was just trying to hurt you the way I was hurting, I was lashing out." Kate assured. "It was cruel and I'm sorry. You shouldn't have held on to that."
"Well...and then ...the wedding of course was ...oh, that was really, really..."
"Outstanding! Earthshatteringly wonderful! Momentous?" Kate offered.
Caroline smiled shyly. "But since then...we haven't, I mean...you haven't seemed to want to..."
"Caroline!" Kate stopped Caroline's mouth with a small kiss. "The reason I haven't ripped your clothes off every night this week is because, in case you haven't noticed, I am the size of a small bus and I am conscious of not being the hot younger woman you originally signed up for."
Caroline was shocked by the admission and ran a hand over Kate's hair. "But you're more beautiful than ever!" She stated.
Kate grinned. "I'm pleased you think so..." She kissed the tip of Caroline's nose. "What a pair." She said, rolling her eyes.
Caroline snatched a moment with Kate's lips and then Kate turned back to her comfy position.
"Now..." She began. "Can we get a few hours sleep before we drive back to Harrogate and can show each other that we truly mean everything we have just said?"
Caroline yawned and let her eyes fall shut, unable to keep a smug smile from her lips. "Yes." She agreed. "Happy New Year, my darlings!"
Xxxx
A/N- Thanks for reading xxx