[Written for Halloween Bingo 97 (creature) Vampire][Crack!fic, high as a kite] [written for you!...or whoever are the poor readers that read my stories] [Snarky's Halloween challenge: prompt 1 (afraid)]
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Count Snape
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Sirius admired himself in the mirror. He had to admit he was a very good-looking man.
Very good looking. With a satisfied smile he adjusted his cravat, which topped an old-fashioned all black suit he was wearing.
Suddenly a vampire called behind him and he yelped in shock as he saw Count Severus Snape standing behind him.
"What are you doing here, Count?" he snapped. "It's not time yet for our date."
Count Severus Snape shrugged and wiped his fangs from the flesh blood he'd been drinking earlier in the evening. "That may be so," Severus Snape spoke slowly in a deep, silky voice that sent shivers down Sirius's spine. "But I'm hungry now...I need to be fed."
Sirius grimaced. "But I want to order pizza! Not blood and fried guts, you know your type of food turns my stomach."
Snape pouted and licked at his fanged teeth. "Fine. We'll have pizza, but you let me have a lick at your blood. Please just one drop?"
Sirius scowled but then waved his arms. "Fine, but you better just have one drop and no more!"
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Snape prowled like a sexy panther as he strode up to the other man. He hovered over Sirius, inhaling his delicious scent, before smirking and lowering his lips to Sirius's neck.
He lapped and kissed greedily at Sirius's neck, before he sunk his fangs into Sirius and then inserted a straw into the other man's neck to start sucking out the blood. "Yummy! Tastes like fruit punch!" Snape informed the pureblood as he drained his neck. Sirius held back a moan, he was feeling very lightheaded. "Just don't drink all my blood Severus, or certain parts of me might not work later!"
"Oops you're right, sorry. I'll slow down," Snape said and removed his straw from Sirius's neck.
Sirius smiled drowsily as he waved his wand over his neck to heal it and then drank a blood replenishing potion. "You're lucky you found a vaccine for Vampires, so you can suck my blood all you like without actually changing me."
Snape shrugged non-consequentially. "I couldn't stand to kill you Black." He smirked. "Maybe once, I would've gladly killed you or pushed you off a bridge. But once I tasted a drop of your delicious, pure blood, I knew I had to keep you alive and with me always."
"Yeah, well, I wish I could say the same." Sirius yawned as he sat back on their couch and began to floo phone the pizzeria. "You don't even sparkle and aren't as good looking as the vampires in the movies! I think I got a raw deal!"
Snape sighed. "Learn to appreciate what you have Sirius, not everything is like the movies! Besides I think I'm a very good boyfriend." He huffed and swung his black bobcut back haughtily.
Sirius snorted. "You wish!"
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