The Contest

It was a very hot, mid-summer day. Bugs were bursting into flames, fires were sweating from the heat, and Trunks was relaxing in their bathroom Jacuzzi. Vegeta walked in and began to piss, completely ignoring the fact that his son was present. "Dad, what the hell?!"

"Shut up, I need to piss like a race horse," Vegeta snapped.

"That- What is that supposed to mean?" Vegeta flicked some into the tub. Trunks immediately jumped out and wrapped a towel around himself before kicking Vegeta in the shin.

"Oh, it's ON!" Vegeta began trying to piss on Trunks, shooting more urine than humanly possible, and Trunks fought back with black magic… AKA the pole holding the shower curtain.

A few hours later, Vegeta had just finished a training session and was taking a drink when Goku warped beside him. "Hey 'Geta, what'cha doing?"

'Geta' sighed. "I am drinking water. Please don't ruin that moment for me."

Goku looked at the bottle and snorted in disgust. "You call that a drink? Wimp."

There were three things Vegeta couldn't stand: Gypsies, being called a wimp, and world domination crazy aliens. And because this- Oh, also telemarketers, but no one likes them. A person that leaves staplers empty and don't tell anyone counts too. And this happened to be- Ooo, I know another: People who laugh all the way through their own jokes. Okay, so he can't stand a whole ton of things. The important thing is that this is part of the top three! Well that's not true either… Whatever.

"Is that a challenge Kakarott?"

"It just may be, only if you accept though."

"What do you honestly think?"

-A while later-

Vegeta once again had to take a piss, bigger than last time due to his contest with Goku. That had gone on for three hours before they ran out of water, and Goku had left to get more. In the meantime, Vegeta planned to cheat by letting some weight loose. With a smirk on his face, Vegeta went to the bathroom to find that it was "under repairs".

"Never stopped me before!" He opened the door to find Bulma's father engaged in battle with a giant squid emerging from the toilet. "But that has."

He went through all the bathrooms in the mansion to find no place to go. Each one had a different person battling against something different that was coming out of the toilet. Vegeta went to a fast food restaurant. "Do you have a bathroom?" he asked the cashier.

"It's for paying customers only," the clerk said. Vegeta scoffed and walked toward where he thought it was, but the clerk pulled out a double barrel shotgun. "Choose your next words wisely."

Vegeta had left his wallet at home so he went down the road, only to step in drying cement. It dried immediately, so Vegeta took his shoes off and jumped over the cement… Into dog crap. He took off his socks and stepped over that. Only to step in hot tar. "ARGH, are you kidding me?" He started flying.

Trunks was looking around for Vegeta. Why he was looking, we may never know. All we know is he found peanut butter sandwiches glued to the ceiling in a shape spelling Vegeta's name. Vegeta does very interesting things when he's bored. Trunks raised an eyebrow at this and kept looking.

He eventually found a note on the back of the fridge.

Gone to piss.

Vegeta.

Well that wasn't good. Whenever Vegeta wanted to do something, he became obsessed with it and no matter who, what, or where stood in his way he'd get it done.

"Screw this, I'll just piss behind a bush." Vegeta lowered into a park and walked behind a bush. He would have started, but a squirrel came and started clawing at his left ear. The Saiyan fought it off as hard as he could, but the creature was smart, and small.

The fight was epic and long, but the squirrel came out as the victor. It knocked him unconscious and dragged Vegeta back to his home where Goku was waiting. "Thanks Nibbles." The squirrel nodded in acknowledgement then left.

When Vegeta woke up, he noticed that he still had to piss and Goku had four jugs full of water. "Shall we begin?" he asked, an evil tone in his voice.

"I am going to make squirrels extinct when this is all over… You know I can."

"I don't doubt you. Now let's do this!"

Vegeta was undoubtedly losing this round, he couldn't handle any more water but Goku was drinking perfectly. "No fair, you have a bigger body and a longer digestive system…"

"Not to mention I went to the bathroom like three times."

"WHAT?!"

"Did I forget to tell you? Me and Krillin made a bet, and right now I'm winning!"

"That little asshole… I'm going to piss in his ear!" Vegeta flew out the window toward Krillin's home.

Trunks watched this in amusement. "So what was the bet?" he asked Goku.

"Huh? Oh, no bet, Krillin just hasn't given my screwdriver back so I did all this," Goku explained.

"My dad always calls you an idiot and a lot of worse things that I don't feel like reciting, but I'm beginning to see some deception. Wanna teach me?"

Not much I could think of to add to this redone chapter. I changed a lot of it, and practically made a new chapter, but I guess I'll upload chapter 30 to make up for it.