Thanks for all of you who read and reviewed this story so far! I cried when I was writing it! It's still sad, but I hope you enjoy the second half. I don't own these characters…
Sick of Dreaming: Part 2
Morgan and Prentiss walked into the operating room where Will sat holding JJ's hand. The room was silent with the exception of Will's muffled sobs, as his face was buried against her neck. The sight of him crying over her body like that was heartbreaking, and Emily couldn't stop the tears that spilled onto her cheeks. She and Derek approached the couple without words. They didn't know what to say in that moment any way.
Derek looked down at JJ's lifeless body and cringed at the sight. How could this happen to their JJ? If he wasn't seeing her with his own eyes he might not believe it. She was so still that it scared him. It scared him because he knew that the stillness wouldn't change. Death is permanent. It can't be taken back when it's all said and done. He looked down at Will who had yet to say anything to them then back at Emily who looked absolutely devastated. Their eyes met, and he nodded in understanding.
She reached out to touch Will's shoulder. "Will." She said softly.
He looked back at his girlfriend's friend and co-worker with a tear streaked face and red eyes. "She's gone Emily." Was all he said.
"I know. And I'm so sorry."
"I don't know what to do."
Morgan stepped forward and laid his hand on Will's arm. "I'm sorry Will. We all loved JJ."
Emily and Morgan watched as Will held onto JJ's hand and wiped the tears from his face. Her heart went out to him, and she knew that him having to tell Henry and JJ's mom would be the hardest thing he ever had to do. Will looked down at JJ for what seemed like forever without anyone saying anything. She knew they had to clear the operating room so that JJ's body could be moved. She cleared her throat looking down at Will and JJ.
"Will I know you don't want to go, but we can't leave her like this." She said gently. "Let them come in and move her from out of here."
"Yeah, Will." Morgan agreed. "You don't want to see her like this."
Still Will said nothing. He just stared at JJ. He knew that they had to clear the room and let them come in and take JJ to the morgue. He knew that. He couldn't wrap his mind around doing that though. How was he just supposed to walk out of here and leave her? He felt a hand on his shoulder, and was briefly pulled out of his thoughts.
"Will please…" Emily was on the verge of tears again.
Then suddenly he stood up. "I have to call her mom."
"We can call her if you want us…" Morgan started to say, but Will just shook his head.
"I have to go call her mom." He repeated. More tears made their way down his cheeks. He leaned down and kissed JJ's forehead. "I love you Jennifer." He whispered.
Will turned to walk out of the room with Emily and Derek in tow. The profilers looked at Will's defeated form as he walked through the double doors, then back at their fallen friend. It was all just too much to comprehend, but they had to. Jennifer Jareau was dead, and she wasn't coming back to any of them.
Will stopped just inside the lounge and pulled his phone from his pocket. He didn't say anything as he pulled up the phone number for JJ's mother. The team watched him as he was about to make a very heartbreaking phone call. He hit the send button, and the phone on the other end started to ring. Mrs. Jareau picked up after four rings.
"Will!" She exclaimed. "What a nice surprise. You calling to check on Henry?"
"Sandy…" Will choked out. He fell silent, not knowing how to say the words. Garcia came to stand right beside him.
"Will? Are you there?"
Will took a deep breath and started again. "Sandy it's JJ."
"Will what's happened?" The fear was clear in her tone. And he couldn't do anything to quell that fear.
"There was an accident this morning." He cleared his throat before continuing. "A car accident."
"Will is Jennifer okay?"
Silence on the other end.
"Will!" She shouted his name into the phone. "Jennifer! Is she okay?"
"No." he whispered. "She's not."
Mrs. Jareau started crying on the phone, and Will hoped Henry wasn't around to hear or see it. "My baby?" Her voice was strained. "Will, she's not…?" She couldn't ask the question.
"Please just come right away." Will said. He hung up before she could say another word. He stared at the floor for what seemed like forever. JJ's team members all watched him with pity in their eyes. He couldn't take it. He had to get away from them. He started off down the hallway, but Garcia grabbed his arm.
"Where are you going?"
He turned back to look at his girlfriend's best friend and his son's godmother. He could see the sadness and worry in her eyes. He knew that they all loved JJ, but Will felt like he'd been torn in two. His son would be coming home, and he had to make sure he had everything he needed for him. He couldn't come to terms with the fact that he had to tell Henry that his mama was gone.
"Henry is going to be hungry when he gets home later. I need to make him something to eat." He started off down the hallway, and everyone followed.
"Will let us help you." Spencer said speaking up.
"Help me?" he asked confused.
Now it was Rossi's turn to speak. "Will, we're here for you and Henry. Whatever you need."
"I need to go home so I can be there when my son gets there."
"I'll drive you." Emily said, taking the keys from his numb fingers. The two stepped on the elevator without another word.
Hotch turned to the rest of his team. His shattered, broken team. "I need to get over to the BAU so I can talk to Strauss and go over JJ's file."
Rossi turned to Morgan. "Why don't the three of you head over to meet Emily and Will? I'll make sure the doctor has any information he needs before leaving."
They all nodded and headed off to their respective assignments. It was barely the middle of the afternoon, and the day was only going to get worse. Will still had to tell Henry about his mom.
Meanwhile…
Will never said a word in the car with Emily. He just looked out the window, and he would occasionally wipe the tears from his eyes. Once they got to the house he sat in the car without moving. He and JJ had bought this house together a year ago. She had fallen in love with the place when they found it, and now without her, he was afraid to go in.
"Will it's okay if you can't…" Emily trailed off as he shook his head. He opened the car door and got out. She followed suit, waiting so he could unlock the door. They went inside the quiet townhome. Prentiss noted that Morgan, Reid, and Garcia had pulled up to the house as well. Will walked through the house and up the stairs. Emily flinched when she heard the bedroom door slam shut.
At the BAU…
Agent Hotchner pulled JJ's file out of the cabinet. She knew that she had all of her affairs in order. He just needed them for when he went to Strauss. His back was turned when he heard a knock on his office door. Turning around, he saw it was Section Chief Strauss. He looked down at the file in his hands.
"Aaron…" She began. "I'm so sorry about agent Jareau."
"Thank you." He said.
"The rest of the team?" she raised
"Rossi stayed at the hospital and will pick up Henry and JJ's mom. The rest went to be with Will at home."
"I trust everything I need is in that file?" She asked.
"It is." He confirmed. "We can go over some things before talking to Will and helping with making arrangements."
"Whatever you and the team need, Aaron."
Back at the LaMontagne-Jareau house…
"Where's Will?" Spencer asked looking around the house.
"He went upstairs." Emily said. "He hasn't said a word since the hospital."
"What do we do?" Spencer asked his friends.
"We just be there for him kid." Morgan said.
"I'm going to go up there." Garcia said. She wiped her tears and went upstairs. She came to a stop at the bedroom door. She heard nothing but silence on the other side. She knocked softly on the door.
"Will it's Penelope. Can I come in?" Still silence.
"I'm coming in!" She pushed open the door slowly. Will sat on the floor at the foot of the bed. He stared at a frame photo of himself, JJ, and Henry. Swallowing hard, she sank down to sit beside him.
"I remember that day." She said smiling sadly.
"We had a fight." He barely spoke above a whisper.
"What?" Garcia was confused.
"We fought last night." He looked up his son's godmother. "I slept on the couch."
Garcia touched Will's shoulder, as the tears started to fall down both their faces.
"Will you shouldn't think about that. JJ loved you!"
"I was angry that she was always away, and now she's gone!" Will started to cry, and Garcia pulled him to her in a warm hug. The friends cried together on the floor. "What am I going to do?" he cried.
The pair stayed like that for a long time. The rest of team busied themselves downstairs. Rossi had come back from the hospital with news on how to help Will proceed with funeral arrangements. Hotch was still with Strauss making sure that JJ's file ensured that her benefits would be passed along to both Will and Henry, and that Will was her power of attorney.
"I need to go to the airport and pick up Henry and JJ's mother." Rossi said after briefing the team. "Their plane will be landing soon."
"Okay Rossi." Emily said sadly. "I just hope Will is okay upstairs with Garcia."
"Yeah." Spencer agreed. "We haven't heard any movement in a while."
"We need to just let them be for now guys." Morgan stated. "I'm sure he'll come down once he knows that Henry is here."
"I hope you're right." Emily murmured.
An hour later, Hotch was at the house, and Rossi arrived with Henry and Sandy Jareau. It was somber drive from the airport. He remained upbeat for Henry's sake, but the toddler knew something wasn't right. His grandmother looked sad and was trying not to cry. Rossi pulled into the driveway, and helped Henry out of the backseat. The child was excited to be home again.
"I home now!" he cried. "Grandma, come on!" He ran up the front walk and into the house.
"Henry!" Spencer greeted his godson, scooping him up as he ran into the house. He gave him a tight hug.
"Uncle Spencer." Henry squirmed in Reid's arms. "Where mommy and daddy?"
Just then Will and Garcia appeared in the living room. They both had tear- streaked faces, but Will smiled as Spencer let Henry down so he could run over to him. Sandy walked over to Will and Henry and hugged them both.
"Grandma you hug too tight!"
"I love you both so much!" She started crying again.
For the first time since they arrived, Henry noticed the sad look on everyone's face. He looked up into his father's eyes and saw he was crying like everybody else.
"Why you sad daddy?"
"Let's go sit down little man." Will took him over to the sofa, and Sandy sat down beside them.
"Where's mommy?"
Will's voice caught in his throat at his son's innocent question. "Son, your mama isn't here." He looked at the others in the room before continuing. "She uh…"
"It's okay." Emily whispered to him.
"Mama had an accident today, and she had to go to the hospital."
"She be okay daddy?" His eyes were wide with concern.
"Uh… no buddy." Will couldn't stop the tears that streamed from his face. "The doctors tried their best to help mommy, but her body was too hurt."
"Where is she daddy?"
"Your mommy is in heaven." Sandy Jareau told her grandson, when Will couldn't find the words. "She's going to be watching over you and your daddy."
Garcia started crying into Morgan's chest, while Hotch and Rossi watched the scene unfold with stoic expressions. Will looked at JJ's mom, who was crying openly now. Emily stifled her sobs, but was heartbroken for all of them. Henry again looked at all of the adults in the room.
"Can we go see mommy now?"
Will brushed the toddler's hair back from his eyes and sighed heavily. "We can't right now buddy, but we're all going to get a chance to say goodbye."
"She can't come back from heaven?" Henry asked.
"No." Will said shaking his head. "She can't buddy. God needs her to be one of his angels now."
Sandy stroked her grandson's head. "But don't worry honey, because mommy won't be scared because she knows that you and daddy have each other. You have me as well."
"And all of us!" Garcia said. "We all love you."
Will wasn't surprised as his son started to cry for his mother. It didn't matter what any of them said. His mom was gone, and they couldn't bring her back to him. All he could do was hug him, and tell him that everything was going to be okay. He wasn't even sure that anything would ever be okay again. His heart was broken in two, and without JJ, he didn't think it would ever be whole again.
He was grateful for the team to stay with them through this. He knew that they thought of him and Henry as family. Sandy took a whimpering Henry from his arms as touched motioned him to the corner of the room to talk.
"Will, I know there's no good time, but when you're ready we're here to help you with making arrangements."
"Thank you Aaron." Will said gruffly.
"She'll be given a proper government burial." He said.
Just then the rest of the team approached them.
"Will if you need any of us to stay…" Emily began.
"I'm staying." Garcia said flatly.
Will's body felt numb. He nodded his thanks and walked back over to where Henry was somewhat calmed down in his grandmother's arms.
"I can take him, Sandy." He told her.
"It's okay Will." She whispered. "He's finally calmed down a little."
An hour later…
Henry finally lay down to take a nap, and Sandy busied herself in the kitchen with Emily and Garcia. Will had made some calls to the precinct, and Hotch and Rossi called the BAU and various offices to arrange for a memorial service. Spencer stood by the fireplace looking at pictures of the once happy family. Will came to stand beside him.
"Will I'm so sorry." Spencer said softly.
"Thank you." The detective replied. "I know she was your best friend. She was my best friend too."
Later that night….
Will stood in his bedroom after everyone had gone, with the exception of Garcia and Sandy who of course, were both staying. He felt so tired. Without changing his clothes he crawled onto the bed on JJ's side. In the dark room he once again allowed the tears to fall. His Jennifer was gone, and his heart felt as dark as the room was right now. He felt as though he had fallen into some black hole of despair. Is this what his life would be like now? He knew he couldn't be this way. Not for Henry's sake anyway.
The next day for Will went by without him feeling much of anything. JJ's funeral was tomorrow. There had been a viewing at the local funeral home, and he had barely been able to talk to anyone. He was grateful for Hotch and the team taking the reigns. He just couldn't deal. And Henry just kept asking to see his mom, and why couldn't she wake up. It was just all too much.
Once Henry was down for the night he walked into the living room where JJ's mom was flipping through an old picture album. He sat down beside her. He gazed down at the photos with tear filled eyes. They all looked so happy, and he had to stop himself from remembering how she looked laying in a casket at the memorial service that afternoon.
"She's so beautiful." Will whispered.
"Yes she is." Sandy agreed. "She always will be."
"Thank you for staying with us."
"Honey just because you weren't married to my daughter doesn't mean that I don't think of you as my son!" She said pulling him into a hug. "I will always be here for you and Henry."
"I know." Will just had to think hard about what the future held for him and his son in Washington DC. He had moved there to be with JJ after he found out that she was pregnant with Henry. Do they stay there or go back to New Orleans?
JJ's funeral…
The funeral procession for JJ's funeral was a long one. There were so many friends and co-workers there from both the FBI and the Pentagon. The pallbearers, which includes agents Hotchner, Morgan, Reid, Anderson, and technical analyst Kevin Lynch, situated her casket so the service could start. Will stood in front with Sandy beside him holding onto Henry. Garcia was on his other side with the rest of the team right behind them.
They all listened as the priest said a prayer and blessed the gasket. You could hear the occasional sob escape various patrons. Will took in a deep breath as the priest stopped talking. It was his turn to speak now. He wiped his eyes and cleared his throat.
"I just wanna thank y'all for being here. I know you all loved JJ." He looked down at her casket as he spoke. "I know that she wants us to celebrate her life, and not be sad for her. So today we honor her, and all that she has given each of us. "
"I was directed to her office when I called the FBI to help out on a case I was working on in New Orleans. She was nice enough on the phone, and called me back to say that the BAU would take the case." He paused before continuing. "When the BAU arrived and she introduced herself to me, I was blown away. She wasn't at all how I pictured her. In a good way. And I flirted with her throughout the entire case until she gave me her number before flying back to Quantico. It was pretty much history from there. I fell for her, and knew that she was not a woman let go. She still isn't." His voice faltered as he got choked up with unshed tears. He felt Garcia lay a hand on his shoulder.
"I know that she will be with me and Henry for the rest of our lives. And I will honor her every day." He reached out to Sandy so she could put Henry in his arms. "We love you Jennifer Jareau. May God keep you safe."
One by one, everyone came and placed white roses on her casket before it was lowered into the ground. The priest said a few last words, and everyone started to slowly file away from father and son. Will stood holding Henry as they both looked down at JJ's gasket.
"Henry you know your mommy's spirit is still alive and well. She will always watch over us and keep us safe."
"I miss mommy already daddy." The young boy sniffled.
"Me too buddy." He hugged him tightly. "Wanna blow mommy a kiss?"
Henry nodded and blew a kiss towards his mother's grave. Will did the same before turning to leave. "We love you." He whispered sadly. They walked out of the now quiet cemetery.
One week later….
Will finished packing and taping up boxes in the bedroom. After a lot of thought, heartbreak, and talking with JJ's mom, Will decided take Henry to New Orleans. She wasn't thrilled, because it was far away from where she lived in Pennsylvania, but she understood and respected his decision. He also talked it over with JJ's team. Especially Spencer and Garcia. After all, they were Henry's godparents. Henry was even a little excited to go on a new adventure with his daddy.
Will walked down the stairs and found Henry eating a snack with his aunt Penelope and grandma Sandy. He ruffled his son's blond hair. He looked so much like his mother!
"Hey little man." Will said. "You doing alright?"
"Yeah daddy." He replied. "You alright?"
"I will be son."
Everyone came over to say their goodbyes to Will and Henry. They would drive down to New Orleans to start the second chapter of their life. Will knew they would be back often to visit both the team and JJ's grave site. Once the car was loaded with the items not being shipped, they were ready. Sandy would fly down next week to help them get settled in. They all said their tearful goodbyes. Will buckled Henry in his seat, and pulled away from the house. It now had a for sale sign in front of it. He had found a house he knew JJ would approve of in New Orleans. He looked back and saw the team stood watching. He smiled, knowing that they were his family here. And he would love JJ forever for giving he and Henry those people in his life.
And he smiled at Henry knowing they would both love JJ forever.
The End
SO what did you think? Thanks for reading!