Rating: M
Independence Day
To Jackie, it seemed beyond icky that her mother would bring her third husband to live in the house she had first shared with her first husband and whose second husband's alimony was paying for the upkeep. Marry rich, her mother had told her, and no matter what happens you'll be set for life. Her mom's first attempt had failed miserably, although she did get a nice house out of it, the second proved even more lucrative, and the third, Pam liked to say, was only for love, buoyed by money.
They seemed happy, well, Bob was always happy. It had been him that called, wheedled and whined until she agreed to come to their first annual Independence Day Picnic. Jackie was sure her mother wouldn't have missed her had she not come. Jackie knew Pam loved her, in her way, but she had long ago learned that as well intentioned as her mother was, Pam would never be more than what she was. Being a mother for Pam was not in her priorities list. Pam would rather have a friend that a daughter. She wasn't complaining though, It was always fun to hang out with her mom. They'd go shopping, have nice brunches, and gossip.
"No, I wanted hardboiled eggs not scrambled." Pam berated the maid. "It's so hard to find good help these days," she shook her head as the maid took her plate back into the kitchen.
"Don't fret, Pammy. It's ok." Bob try to sooth her mom. He whispered something into Pam's ear that had her giggling and then dashing out of the room, Bob following close behind.
Alone, Jackie looked down on her plate, and imagined happy face pancakes instead of an egg white omelet. With a sigh she got up, dressed, and went in search of the elusive happy face pancakes.
Hyde's car was there when she arrived, which was no surprise. Again, she was amazed at how many memories that old car held for her. She ran a hand through the shiny metal, marring it, remembering another Independence Day Party, many years before, one she had ditched with Hyde.
They had been alone on Mt. Hump, shielded by darkness and trees, and made brave by lust. She had been in the back, fireworks coloring the black sky, her dress hiked up to her waist, her thighs spread, Steven's head between them, her hands curled inside his hair.
"Jackie!"
She colored instantly at Hyde's sudden appearance, feeling as if every little dirty thought was written on her forehead.
"Man, wake up. It's the third time I called your name. What are you-" He frowned looking at her standing next to the Camino, as if trying to decipher something. A slow knowing smile spread from ear to ear. "Good memories."
"Old memories," she stated. Her color was still high, and even if the words weren't etched on her forehead, Hyde seemed to have a pretty good approximation of what she had been daydreaming about. "Are you going to my Mom's party tonight?" She said changing the subject none too subtlety.
"I wasn't invited, doll."
Of course he wasn't. "Right." She bit her lip. "I'm inviting you."
"As fun as it would be to watch your mother squirm at the very sight of me...I'll pass. Besides, Red's having a barbeque, so I'll be here."
"You're always here, Hyde."
He shrugged. "How long are you staying? We can hang out if you have time."
"I'm only here for today and tomorrow. I just came for the party; Bob cried over the phone," Jackie scrounged her face. "And I have badminton tomorrow with Mom."
"Well," he started, getting into his car, "you should think about staying longer next time. Gives us some time to, revisit some of your favorite memories," he said suggestively.
Jackie laughed. "Goodbye, Hyde."
He waved goodbye as Jackie watched him pull into the street. When she had been broken-hearted over Hyde various people had told her that she was young, and although right now it seemed like the end of the world, there would come a day when her relationship with Hyde would seem silly and childish. She had had met other men, she had been in mature relationships, had even married and still her heart ached a little every time she saw him.
It had gotten better with time, the ache dulling as time pass. She no longer strained to hear even a bit of news about him, no longer hurt when she heard he was dating someone else, no longer internally beamed when he smiled at her, no longer made it a point to mention just how happy she was with another man.
Maybe one day he'd be completely erased from her feelings. Maybe she would stop dwelling on her actions, of what she could have done to prevent the awful downward spiral their relationship had taken. She had been young, and maybe a little overzealous, but even now, thinking back, her relationship with Steven didn't seem unimportant.
With a sigh she turned away from his departing car and went into the Foreman's. The homey smells comforted her, lifting her somewhat strange mood. Coffee, toast, bacon, eggs, oatmeal, so different than her Mom's house, so different from her own home back in California.
"One leaves and another takes its place? This isn't a restaurant," Mr. Forman grouched from his seat on the kitchen table.
"Jackie, dear, sit down. I'll make you some pancakes," Mrs. Forman embraced her, took her by the hand, and sat her down. "Isn't in nice to have the kids visit us? Oh, it's just like before," Kitty said going back to the kitchen to make another batch of pancakes.
Eric gave her a suspicious look as she sat down next to him. "Jackie."
"Hi Eric! Wow, it's been years since I've seen you."
"Jackie, we just saw each other at Bob's and your Mom's wedding." His waggled his eyebrows in disbelief.
"You were there?" Jackie said, with wide-eyed puzzlement. "Wait, you were invited?"
Eric threw a slice of half eaten slice of toast at her.
"Oh, for Pete's sake!"
"Kids, don't fight..."
"Mom, she started it!"
The party was in full swing, meaning everyone was on their fifth cocktail. Jackie, afraid the jackals; officially known as the LOPPS, was only drinking water. Those women were vicious, and they had already tried and failed to corner her by the punch bowl. She had narrowly escaped.
She could sense the rumor mill swirling around her. He left her for another woman. No, it was her; she cheated on him with one of her clients. You haven't heard? He went bankrupt and the little gold-digger left him. Pam told me she got nothing from the divorce, she's practically destitute!
How they mighty had fallen.
"Jackie, get out of the kitchen now. Come on, I want to introduce you to Amanda's son. He's rich, single and good looking. You'll love him. And please, take off those pigtails. You're much too old to pull them off," her mother stuck her head into the kitchen just long enough to deliver her message.
Jackie could hear her laughter through the door, carefree and ladylike, secure in the knowledge that she was, if not loved, envied. Pam was confident in way that Jackie had always imitated but had never truly achieved. Her mom lived her life knowing that everything would turn out exactly the way she wanted it to. Jackie went through life being afraid that life wasn't going to turn the way she wanted.
"How you holding up, sweetie?"
Bob joined her in the kitchen. He looked the worst for wear in his new suit. He was sweating bullets and his smile was strained. This was definitely not a pleasant crowd to be around with. "I'm doing ok. How are you doing?"
He swept a hand on his forehead, shook his head. "I'm dying out there."
"We can always go to the Forman's."
"Your mom..."
"Donna's there."
"But the party..."
"We'll sneak away. Mom won't even notice we left and if she does, she won't mind for very long." That was really sad, but unfortunately true. She needed to leave, if she had to stay hidden for one more minute she might actually kill a LOPP. And that wouldn't achieve anything other than given them something else to talk about. "Bob, pleaseeee." Taking Bob with her would not only take some of the heat off her but also provide cover. There was nothing worse that showing up to a party unaccompanied.
"How about I give you a ride there? And if by some chance I get invited some hotdogs or stuff, I can't be rude now can I?"
The gathering at the Forman's was substantially smaller and much more casual but coincidently much more welcoming. Bob headed straight for the burgers and dogs. Jackie went to Donna who was sitting on the front porch.
"How was the party?"
"It was great; sadly I had to leave it, I just wouldn't be able to live with myself if I had deprived you all of my presence."
"Well, you've done your duty, you can leave guilt free now."
"Donna, you mustn't hide you're true feelings with hurtful words." Jackie, grabbed Donna's arm in pretend concern. Donna shook free, pushed her away playfully.
"How's everything with you and Eric?"
"We're good," she looked around, "We're engaged!" She whispered excitedly.
Jackie's scream was smothered by Donna's hand. "Shh! No one knows yet!"
"Congratulations Donna!"
"Yeah, congrats, Big Red," Hyde approached them.
"You know?"
"Yup, Eric let it slip weeks ago," he took a seat next to Jackie, stared at her hair. "Mrs. Foreman did you hair?"
Jackie stiffed, waiting for the burn about her being too old to wear pigtails. "Eric got egg in my hair this morning. I had to wash it..."
"Nice," he said appreciatively. "Hey, you wouldn't happen to have your cheerleading uniform? Cuz, now would be a good time to bust it out."
"Pervert," she said, but she smiled.
"Hey, speaking of perverts, have any of you heard from Fez?" Donna asked.
"He's in Florida now with his Circus Wife. They're planning to include him in the show."
"I can't believe he married a contortionist. Lucky man," Steven said, taking a swallow from his beer.
"Hey, I'm flexible."
"I remember," he gazed at her lewdly. " Still?"
"Wouldn't you like to know?"
"As a matter of fact, I would."
"Eww, getting a weird vibe here, so bye. I gotta yell at Eric for spilling the beans. Again."
Hyde took a sip of his beer, "So you decided to grace us with your presence after all. What happened? Did your mother want you dressed in matching dresses?"
"Worse. She paraded me around the room, re-introducing me to everyone I already know. For a while there I thought my name was Jackie Recently Divorced or Jackie Newly Single. Oh, it was soooo humiliating. The LOPPS were there," she ended in a defeated sigh.
"The LOPSS got the best of you? Man, what have they done to you in California? Where's the Jackie we all know and hate?"
"It's easy to act better than everyone else when you are better than everyone else. It's a little harder when your life is less than perfect."
"Jackie, your mother's been married three times. She still acts like she's the freaking queen."
"Yeah, but her tequila soaked brain has given her a false sense of reality." Jackie gasped, covered her mouth with her hands. "I didn't mean that."
Hyde laughed, "Yes, you did."
"Oh, screw it. I did." Jackie said with heat.
"That's my girl," Hyde said, leaning over to pull on one of her braided ponytails.
Bob bounding up to them, huffing and puffing. "Your mom's on the phone. She wants to talk to you now." He looked like a boy who had been scolded by his mother. "She yelled at me," he whined.
Jackie rolled her eyes and headed towards the kitchen. "We'll leave right away, mom." There was silence on the other line, which was surprising. "Mom?"
"Jackie, I know you think I don't notice, but I'm your mother and I know when you're unhappy. If you would rather stay with those people stay there. You were being a real downer anyway."
"That's very considerate of you, Mom."
"Don't give me that tone, young lady. I've done my best to pull you out of your mood since you got here. I've taking you shopping, gone to the spa, tried to introduce you to eligible men."
"It's not that easy, mom."
"Yes it is. The divorce is done, get over it. It's been months. You have to move on with your life. Choose to be happy. When your father went to jail, did you see break down? Did you see moping around the house?"
"I didn't see you at all. You left me and went to Mexico."
"You see? I chose to be happy. I chose to have fun."
"And me? Did you think about me?"
"Of course I did. Didn't I bring you all those cute outfits?"
Jackie closed her eyes, counted to ten. "That's not- Never mind."
"Honey, you know what your problem is? You think too much. Everything is do or die to you. Learn to have fun. You always try to force everything, to bend things to your will. That's why your marriage failed. You thought too much, expected too much, tried to control every single aspect. You don't have to do that. Things eventually sort themselves out and if they don't, you'll still have your good looks to help you get by. I love my life, and I wouldn't change it for anything. You know why? Because I squeezed every once of fun from life as I could."
She couldn't take it much longer. "Mom, I gotta go."
"I love you, sweetheart. I really do."
"I know, Mom."
"Have fun, Jackie."
Bob left after assuring that Hyde would be sober enough to drive Jackie home. He gave her a kiss and a pat in the head making her smile. Donna left with him for moral support which meant Jackie spent most of the time with Ms. Forman and Eric.
"You guys are boring, I'm going to go find Hyde," She said after some time.
"Please do," Eric moaned. "My self-esteem can't take any more hits. Hyde's probably in the basement, go torture him."
She hadn't been in the basement in years, and she walked down the familiar path, it was a little like walking back in time. Jackie opened the door with a bit of trepidation, silly though it was, and found everything almost exactly as it had been. Hyde sitting on his chair, feet on the table, slouched, watching TV.
"Hey," he said, his attention barely shifting from the screen.
She remained standing, somewhat overwhelmed with how many memories were forged in this room. Hyde turned towards her, realizing she was just standing there looking around with a strange look to her face. He looked sheepishly at her. "Bad memories?"
They should have been, at least some, but all Jackie could feel here was happiness. Yes, some tears, a stripper wife, but overall, it felt good to be here. "No. Good memories." She smiled as she sat down on the sofa, close to him. "Really good."
He nodded, although his expression still looked pained. "Jacks, I'm-"
Jackie turned to look at him, trying for a stern look, "Don't apologize. You were stupid. I was stupid. We left it at that, remember? We're good now."
He looked put out, that serious expression on his face she had seen so many times on him when he was struggling to put words onto feelings. Funny how well she knew how to read him, even after all these years.
"Hyde," she started, laying a hand on his knee, only to stop abruptly when awareness shot through her. He felt it too, she could tell by the way his body tensed, the look he shot her. She forgot what she was going to say, forgot everything, her world narrowing as he moved towards her, kissing her, pushing her down on the sofa as he had done some many times before.
He had been a wickedly good kisser, a talent it seemed had only improved with age. He tasted like beer and Mrs. Forman's pecan pie, and odd combination that somehow worked on him. His jaw was scratchy from stubble but his lips were soft and yielding, his tongue sweetly persuasive.
"You were serious about revisiting old memories, huh?" Jackie gasped, her body tingling.
"Dead serious," he leaned down to suck on her neck.
She moaned, wanting more, remembering just how good it could be with Steven. It was with him that she first learned how mind-blowing sex could be. He'd taken a special pride in divesting her of her inhibitions, in hearing her grunt with the coarse words he'd taught her. It had been a heady, the discovery, the pleasure, the wonder of it. She wanted to feel that again.
She pushed him away gently. He went willingly, his chest heaving, his breath ragged, looking at her with lust-hazed eyes. "I'm too old to be caught doing it in Eric's sofa."
"My place?"
"Your room, for old time's sake?"
"But that's were..." Sam, he couldn't bring himself to bring her up.
Jackie shrugged. "Our first time. It happened there."
He smirked, pulled her to her feet. The room had reverted back to a storage room, dirty, dingy, the single bulb hardly enough light. They hardly noticed the room; Steven closed the door firmly and pushed her back against it. Every time with Steven felt a little wrong, a little dangerous. God, he always could get her motor running faster than anyone else.
"How could I forget? You were stiff as a board, self-conscious, but determined to go through with it. Then I started kissing you, and you melted." His voice was raspy, strained.
Jackie pulled his t-shirt off, wanting to feel his skin, to remember his body. His hands went under her dress, catching on her panties and pulling them down. It felt naughty and dirty, and exciting, exactly as it used to.
"Then I touched you, and you were so wet," he hissed. "Just like now."
A finger, then two, and she was mewling, moaning, desperate. "Steeeevenn."
"You had a look on your face, such awe. If I hadn't been so hard, I'd have found Kelso and beat him to a bloody pulp. But I was glad too, to have been the one that put that look there, to have made you squirm and moan against my fingers."
He kissed her sloppily, pulling down straps of her dress, making quick work of her bra. She hitched a thigh onto his hip, encouraging him to hurry, impatient as he took his wallet out, took a packet out. His hands were clumsy as he unbuckled his belt, pushed his jeans down. Frantic, she pushed against him with her hips, feeling his hands work a condom over himself. Then he was inside her. So good. So good. Better than she remembered.
He thrust hard, deep.
Jackie grunted, loudly, she didn't care. She wanted more. Her body felt as if it was going to combust. So close already, so close...
He stopped, "Shhh,"
She almost took her nails to his face, then she heard the voices. Mrs. Foreman and Eric in the basement, searching for them. They locked eyes, they stared at each other, joined, desperate. Jackie wondered if she her eyes showed the same fraught tension as his did. She clenched tightly, fraying his control further, relishing his strained response. Her hips gyrated at their own volition, seeking relief, seeking her pleasure.
"Fuck," he rasped, his fingers digging hard into her waist.
They heard the upstairs doors close; Steven slammed into her, rattling the door behind her, groaning roughly at her ear, telling her sinfully delicious things. Steven grunted in her ear, a low growl, and the sound, so familiar, snapped the tension. She was gone, shattered, lost and he along with her.
"That was hot," Steven stated afterward, still supporting her legs that had gone numb. He let go slowly, making sure her legs could support her.
The panic started when they pulled apart. What had she done? Jackie tried to fix her dress as Hyde put himself to rights. She couldn't find her panties or her bra. She was sure her hair was a mess, that her make up was beyond repair, that she would have crawl out of the basement in shame. Hadn't she learned from her mistakes? Hadn't she learned her lesson? Now what? What did this mean?
"Here," he said, brining her bra over. Then he squatted, took her leg put it through the opening of her panties, then the other, pulled them up slowly, lingered on her bottom. "Jackie?"
She swallowed hard, bit her lip, not knowing what to say, what to do. He kept looking at her, waiting for her to say something, uncertainty filling his eyes, ready to shield himself in aloofness. She wracked her brain, thinking of what to say. What did he want her to say? What did he want?
Inexplicably her mother's words echoed in her head.
She smiled, "Yeah, it was hot."
He leaned forward to kiss her nose. Yes, she remembered this too, how sweet he always was afterwards. She luxuriated in the feelings, pushed her misgivings aside. One time thing or not, she needed to stop trying to plan every single step. She took a calming breath. She was loathed to admit it, but her mother had been right. She needed fun, she needed to stop trying to control everything. It hadn't much helped her in the past, had done her more harm than good. She had planned her marriage to perfection, had agonized over everything from their social schedules to how many vacations a year they should take. It had blown up in her face.
No, she wasn't going to ruin this tryst with Hyde with doubts and insecurities. She would squeeze every once of joy from it as she could. It had been the best sex she had in ages. She had to let herself enjoy it instead of burying it with guilt or shame. Yes, she had been carried away, by nostalgia and memories and leftover lust or whatever, and it probably was one of the stupidest things she had done recently. So what? Maybe it had been exactly what she needed.
"Everyone is going to know," Hyde said, watching her put on her bra and try to fix her wrinkled dress, not truly managing to hide his pride. Men.
She took her hair down, undid the braids, pulled the hair into one ponytail as Hyde opened the door to check if it was clear to leave the room. "You know, I'm feeling too good to care," she said smiling widely.
There was definite skip to her step as they made their way out of the basement.