Steph wakes up.

The woman who greets her smiles and announces that Steph is in a recovery room. It all feels very wrong, from the woman's tone of voice, to the fabric of Steph's clothing. And then she hears the radio.

"Where am I really?" she asks, eyes narrowing.

"I'm afraid I don't understand," the woman asks, Steph can sense a slightly nervous tic.

"The game," Steph says. "The game is from May 1941. I know because I was there."

Steph stands and the woman moves backwards.

"Now, I'm going to ask you again. Where am I?"

As Steph moves closer to the woman, two armed guards enter the room. They immediately charge at her. Steph easily takes them and tosses them through the wall. It horrifies her when the wall crumbles revealing that it was a setup as well as confirms her doubts. Steph's been captured but where exactly is she?

"Captain Rogers!" the woman shouts, but Steph's already gone.

The building looks so strange. Everything is too silver and smooth for her to be comfortable. It's highly disconcerting but Steph's got to get out. People everywhere are shouting and making attempts to catch her. She doesn't recognize anything. She keeps running. Maybe if she keeps running, she'll find someone or where she was being held.

She burst outside and everything is suddenly bright. Steph pushes it to the back and continues to run when cars begin to honk angrily at her. The model and make of the cars are completely unknown to her.

Steph comes to a screeching halt when she finds her self in a place she vaguely remembers. It's Times Square, but the flashing lights are doing an excellent job of hiding it.

Steph's in New York. A warped, brightly coloured version of it. Her head hurts as she tries to understand what's going on. The lights and all the foreign surroundings are completely overwhelming her.

Black cars surround her and people decked out in black follow. tenses up and whirls around to look at all the people also exiting the cars to surround her, no doubt each of them are armed. She's not going down without a fight, even if she is completely outnumbered. Steph focuses on a man in sweeping black coat and an eye patch who steps out of the ring that's surrounded her.

"At ease soldier," the man says as if it will have any effect on him. "Look, I'm sorry about that little show back there, but we thought it would be best to break it to you slowly."

"Break what?" Steph asks.

"You've been asleep, Cap. For almost 70 years."

Steph feels her world collapse around her. Even though she crashed her plane, she never wanted this. To wake up in the future where possibly everyone she knew is dead.

"You gonna be okay?"

"Yeah. I just," Steph breaks off but doesn't finish her sentence. She doesn't know how to.

What does she feel? Is she okay? Her life and world are completely gone.

"We're going need to debrief you on a few things, Cap. So if you'll come with me back to HQ, we'll answer your questions."

SHIELD gives her everything that she needs at the time and an agent asks her if she has any questions after the debriefing.

("You've been very quiet, Captain Rogers. Do you have any questions before we escort you to your new quarters?" the agent asks, not unkindly but with an edge to her voice Steph doesn't like.

"The war," Steph says immediately, almost automatically. "Who won?"

The agent smiles benignly but it doesn't reach her eyes.

"We won, Captain. Congratulations," the agent says.

It feels empty. Steph allows herself to be lead out and sets herself on autopilot. A million questions are running through her mind.

'We won,' Steph thinks. 'What does that even mean?')

She's gets a small SHIELD regulated apartment in Brooklyn that feels wrong. She avoids spending time there at all costs. Everything about it sets her on edge. All the appliances constantly blinking and requiring her attention bother her. She can't sleep when every object in the apartment produces light.

Instead she looks to find the things that made up old New York.

An agent checks up on her daily even though Steph's pretty sure her entire apartment is already bugged. An intelligence agent isn't going to just let a recently defrosted Captain America run freely through the 21st centurty.

Most of all Steph doesn't want to catch up; she doesn't want to face the inevitable. Steph knows she's been erased from history and can't bring herself to face that. She can't help think that she has been complicit in her own erasure.

Steph finds parks to wander. She finds cafés to sketch in and draw the altered skyline of New York. (Steph can still picture the old one. She can remember spending hours memorizing every edge and carefully sketching it into her sketchbook. She can spot all the difference.)

She briefly wonders what happened to her and Bucky's possessions. She wonders what happened to the things she had kept back at base and Bucky's things, which had been given to her after his death.

Bucky's death is still fresh in her mind. Steph had been hurting from his loss when she crashed and it's feels like it was only yesterday that she was listening to Peggy desperately beg her to find another way. The wound is still fresh in her mind amplified by the loss of her friends from the war.

Steph draws a lot. She can afford good quality supplies now. She still uses every sketchbook to the fullest potential – old habits die hard. In them are faces of people she knew. Bucky stretched across his bed in their old apartment as he complains about how hot it is, Peggy's eyebrow arching as Peggy knew that whatever she was watching was ridiculous but still amusing, or the Commandos playing a poker game, surrounded by classes of whisky, and cigarettes handing precariously from their lips.

The shield stays tucked away in her closet. Steph use to think, that after the war, she'd hang it up in her home. Bucky would've called it tacky and Steph would've just pushed him playfully. She can't even look at it now. So long it had been attached to her side, but now she gets sick looking at it. The shield represents her past and the future she lost.

She avoids the future but also the past. Steph sits in an uncomfortable limbo, too afraid to move on but unable to move back.

(To Steph, the future only holds her erasure.)

Steph finds an old fashioned boxing place on a wandering one early morning. The owner is more than awake inside and kindly allows her to come in when he sees her admiring the place. He's wise enough to see Steph's troubled gaze and suggests that's some physical activity may help clear her head.

She mostly uses it to beat the shit of a punching bag trying to get the voices of the past out of her head. It's at night when she finds herself beating the bags with the force that would surely damage a human.

Nick Fury, the man who heads SHIELD, finds her there. She knew this was coming. People want Captain America. People will always want Captain America.

"Trouble sleeping?" Fury asks.

"I slept for 70 years, I've had my fill," Steph replies.

Fury smiles ruefully.

"You gotta mission, sir?" Steph asks.

Fury hands her the file and Steph has the strangest urge to burn it. It's like the world is laughing in her face. A blast from the past, the picture of the Tesseract mocks her.

But Steph knows what she's got to do.

Steph meets Phil Coulson on the flight over to SHIELD's mobile HQ. He's quite excited to meet her; she can see it in his eyes even though he's trying to keep it professional. He's a Captain America fan and Steph knew she couldn't avoid Cap's legacy forever, but she thought she's make it longer than a week.

She pulls the shield from the closet; it's resting beside her now. She runs her fingers along the edges. The metal quietly sings with her touch. She loves this shield and even though it use to represent the past she lost – something is changing. It's the last thing she has from the past that will protect her. It can't watch her back like Bucky, but it can damn well try. The shield is the bridge.

"Did you know I was a woman?" Steph asks Phil.

The question has been burning in the back of her mind since she realizes Phil is a fan of the Cap comics, cartoons, and legacy.

He's leaning against the wall of the transport. Phil jolts when he realizes that she's talking to him.

"I had my doubts that you weren't a man," Phil nods.

"How?"

"There's this picture in an old Captain America biography I owned as a kid. You weren't in full costume. In most official photographs, you're always in full costume. But this one you weren't wearing the cowl and were missing the final padding of the uniform. I noticed the build wasn't usual for a man, that's all. I didn't want to assume – just in case."

"So you weren't shocked when I was discovered to be a woman?" Steph questions.

Phil coughs awkwardly.

"I was just happy you were found. We've spent years searching for you, Cap. SHIELD specializes in government cover-ups; so finding out the Captain America had been a woman had been a big deal. No one really knew – that's how big it was."

Steph's blood runs cold. No one knew. No one. Stephanie Rogers did not exist, only Steven.

"Not as a big deal as it will be when the rest of the world finds out," Phil adds after a moment.

"I'll be able to tell the world?" Steph says in complete shock.

"You're about to make you're world debut, Cap. I've always spoken personally to the design team on your new outfit. I don't think anyone will doubt you're a woman."

"Thank you," Steph says. "And please, just call me Steph. Not Cap."

"Of course," Phil smiles.

Steph has just found the first person in the 21st century that she actually likes.

The whole Avengers ordeal is a flurry activity. Steph's unofficially made the leader and for a brief period of time, she's surrounded by companions. It's a nice feeling and she's doesn't feel so isolated anymore. These people, although they all have completely different life experiences, somewhat understand what it means to be different and secluded from the rest of humanity.

The uniform Phil had design input on is perfect. It's designed to perfectly fit her body and not hide it. The red and white lines accentuate the curves of her body. Steph wants the world to know that Steve Rogers doesn't exist. She never gets to thank Phil.

But as quickly as it happened, it ended. Thor goes back to Asgard, bringing Loki with him and Bruce and Tony go their separate ways. Natasha and Clint go back to being spies. SHIELD offers her a position, a high ranking agent, but Steph says she'll think about.

First she's got a few things to do. Steph's ready to move forward. She's ready to leave her limbo and just move on, no matter what the future what the future holds.

Steph doesn't totally lose touch with the other Avengers, other than Thor. Sometimes Natasha and Clint are the agents "assigned" to check up on her. As time passes, these checkups become less frequent however. The checkups may become less frequent, but Natasha and Clint visit more often as normal people, not SHIELD agents. When Natasha and Clint come to check up on her, it ends up that Steph has dinner guests.

Clint claims to know how to cook but Natasha laughs at him for it.

"We don't get home cooked meals that often," Natasha admits. "Mostly SHIELD regulated stuff."

"Or we eat at a restaurant," Clint shrugs.

"Well you two are my guinea pigs. We didn't have a lot of money so cooking wasn't exactly something I did extravagantly," Steph says as she serves the spaghetti she made. "It's amazing what people do with food now."

"Well whatever you cooked, I'm sure it was fantastic," Clint says brightly.

"I can't help but notice you always say 'we,' Steph. When you're talking about your past." Natasha comments.

Steph stills. She has?

"I'm talking about Bucky," she says after a beat and returns to serving. "He was my best friend, we lived together before the war."

"Bucky Barnes," Clint says, letting the name roll of his lips. "I heard he's quite the shot."

"Yeah, he saved my bacon quite a few times back in the day," Steph nods.

The loss of Bucky still affects her everyday. She's too quiet and Clint and Natasha look at her funny.

"Dig in!" Steph says mustering a false cheeriness that would've made her USO acting coach applaud. "I made this for you, so eat!"

Natasha and Clint don't bring up Bucky Barnes again. Steph makes sure to stop saying 'we' when referring to her past, no matter how deeply entwined it is with Bucky.

Despite initial tensions, Steph finds herself quite liking Tony Stark. They don't talk much, but Steph is constantly receiving the finest technology delivered to her door, pre-programmed with Tony's number. Steph wonders how many people have Iron Man's personal phone number. Then she wonders how many people would want Captain America's personal phone number.

(The appliances' light become less intruding and Steph learns that they are actually quite helpful. What she could have done with the things she has in the 21st century.)

With access to technology comes accelerated learning. Steph reads up on everything she can on the Internet, which turns out to be anything and everything. She gets Clint, Natasha, Tony, and Bruce constantly texting her things that she has to check out. A book, a place, a moment in history, music, a movie, a show, the list goes on and on. Steph thinks that her friends are having too much fun teaching her about the 21st century.

Steph buys lots of books. She loves to read. Books were a luxury she did not have growing up and now they readily accessible. She has stacks of books hanging out around her apartment.

As well with access to technology comes connection to the media and the world.

Tony specifically invites her over to set up her media accounts.

"Now this one is your Facebook fanpage, you don't have to run it. I have people for that," Tony says.

"I'm sure people want to actually talk to Captain America," Steph says. "I'll run it myself."

Tony rolls his eyes.

"Of course you will. So your personal page will just be for good ol' Steph Rogers. No Captain America at all. This one's the one you only want to be friends with people you know. Oh look you have a friend request!"

Steph clicks on the red notification.

"Tony Stark? How did you do that? You're not even at a computer." Steph asks.

Tony waves his phone at her.

"Technology is everywhere."

"Apparently."

"So this next one is twitter."

Tony gets Steph to set up an official Captain America Twitter, Facebook page, and instagram. She has no idea how she'll keep up with these, but likes the idea of staying connected with people.

Being connected to media also means she gets to follow the constant war that is Captain America's true identity. SHIELD promised they had it covered and Steph only needs to speak at a handful of press conferences.

But it still goes on. A government cover-up never goes well when revealed. Steph ignores it and focuses on the people love Captain America, regardless of her gender.

Steph accepts the job with SHIELD a year after New York. It's immediately requested that she moves to Washington, to be closer to the main HQ. She's sad to leave her Brooklyn apartment and the boxing gym. She doesn't find a place quite like the New York gym in Washington. Instead she starts to run, it's much more therapeutic than beating up a punching bag.

Steph's given a team and often gets to work with Nat and Clint. Especially Nat. Steph feels fluidity when working with Natasha that she's never felt with anyone else before. They understand each other's movements and seem to be able to read each other's minds on missions.

(It saves their lives on multiple occasions.)

The Smithsonian exhibit opens up about six months after Steph moves to Washington. At first she doesn't want to go but is eventually is drawn to it. With the reveal of Steph Rogers and tear down of Steve Rogers, what is the story that will be presented? What light will Steph be discussed in? Will the cover-up be explained or hidden?

When she first arrives, she's outraged to find her belongings behind the glass. It's her stuff and Bucky's stuff. Initially, Steph wants to just smash the glass and take it back. After standing in front of a display of an old sketchbook, fists clenched she comes to a realization. What's she going to do with a bunch of old, outdated stuff? Probably just look at them with shaking hands before hiding them in a box.

She does want her sketchbooks back. She puts a request in and a few days later, Natasha is delivering them to her.

Steph spends a lot of the time watching the clips they have people talking about her. They refer to her as Steve. She can see the agony in Peggy's eyes whenever she says Steve. Peggy uses Captain Rogers most of the time in the clips.

Clint tells Steph that Peggy is alive and living in a old folk's home in Washington. Steph's heartbroken when she's told Peggy has Alzheimer's, but visits her regardless.

Peggy cries when she sees Steph and they'll talk of Peggy's life and of Steph's new one. Sometimes Peggy will relapse in the video and will be as if she's seeing Steph for the first. Most of the time Peggy's okay though, but Steph's never sure if she'll be seeing Peggy for the first time in over seventy years every time she visits.

With the arrival of the Smithsonian visit, Steph realizes that no matter how much she becomes accustomed to the modern world – she'll always be carrying her past with. It's always going to haunt her.

(The more time Steph spends at the Smithsonian, the more she'll lose herself in the past. )

Life goes on for Steph. She grows her hair out. She buys nice clothing. She plays around with the new makeup and finds that it's still not quite for her. She draws. She buys a houseplant. She goes away on a two-week mission and finds the houseplant dead. She runs.

Steph knows this is what life is, but she feels like there should be something else. She spends far too much time lost in her own head, thinking about what could have been and what's she's missing now. It's a dangerous line she's walking – even though she's no longer in the miserable limbo, Steph's still at risk of falling right back in.

It's another six months when Steph meets Sam Wilson. It's a friendship she desperately needs. They laugh and joke easily and Steph realizes that this is what she had been missing. Just a plain old friend who's willing to watch your back.

("What do you like to do for fun?" Sam asks when she visits him at the VA.

Steph takes a moment. She spends a lot of time at the Smithsonian, reminiscing. She spends a lot of time catching up by reading. But is she really having fun? Steph's mostly lonely.

"I don't know," Steph replies honestly because really she doesn't know. )

The day she meets Sam is also the day that Steph's life takes a turn for the worse.

The man holds the shield awkwardly. Steph doesn't like when other people touch her shield. She hates even less when people throw it, it's always getting stuck in things that way. Watching the man use the shield against her is almost laughable. To him it's a weapon. The shield is not a weapon.

The Winter Soldier has already thrown it at her once and now he's using it to fight against her. Steph knows it's only a matter of time before the shield betrays the Winter Soldier. It will miss its intended target and wait to be held by someone who understands how to use it. The Winter Soldier ends up throwing the shield at Steph, but misses. It gets lodged in a van and Steph suppresses a sigh.

Their fight continues. The Winter Soldier is all sharp edges and extremely concentrated on his goal as he flips his knives and attempts to stab or strangle Steph. The Winter Soldier is on a mission to eliminate her and he'll do whatever is takes to achieve his purpose.

She admits that she and the Winter Soldier are on the same level as they exchange blows and blocks. She's never had someone move as fast as her before. The fight is strangely exhilarating.

Steph gets one good hit in and the Winter Soldier's mask falls off.

"Bucky?" Steph chokes out.

Bucky looks at her blankly.

"Who the hell is Bucky?" he asks.

Natasha shoots, Sam soars in, and the Winter Soldier, Bucky, is gone. Hydra goons surround them and Steph can here a rifle pressed the back of her head. There's shouting and Steph knows that if they don't do anything, they'll all be killed. She can's bring herself to move. There's a ringing in her ears. That was Bucky.

Bucky's not dead. Bucky didn't die from the fall. Steph didn't even try to go looking for him, she thought about it but there was more pressing matters. She did crash her plane into the Arctic only a handful of days later. It's hard, trying to comprehend what was done to Bucky and Steph can't help but feel the guilt weigh down.

("It's not you fault, Steph," Natasha says before anything without even thinking about it.

Steph feels mildly better. How could she have known?)

Firstly, She's on the run. Everyone she once trusted is either dead or wants her dead. Secondly, her thought dead best friend is now a brainwashed Soviet assassin.

Steph's broken down.

"Steph," Sam calls as he walks over her.

Steph doesn't react to his arrival, but feels grateful as he stands next to her. Sam's a comforting and stable presence. He's a normal guy, unlike the others that she calls her friends. Somehow, Sam's still down for this crazy ride. They have a plan in action. To put down SHIELD, to put down Hydra, and predictably, save the world. Sam does not balk, he merely takes it with a grin and an witty comment.

"That was Bucky," Steph says almost childishly. "My best friend."

"He's going to be there," Sam says, standing next to her and his shoulder presses against hers.

"I know," Steph says.

"I don't think he's the type of guy that you save, Steph. I think he's the guy that you stop," Sam says seriously.

Steph hangs her head. She knows what Bucky's become. Natasha gave him the details.

"I won't be able to do it, Sam."

Sam sighs and puts his hand on her shoulder. Steph doesn't know what she's going to do when she inevitably fights Bucky tomorrow.

They don't talk. Sam and Steph just wait.

"I'm not going to fight you," Steph says and the shield slips from her arms and down into the water below.

Dropping the shield signals her giving up and unwillingness to go on. She can't go on knowing this is what Bucky's become. She's losing far too much blood and every bullet lodged into her body burns. Steph has given up on multiple levels.

The Winter Soldier yells out and tackles her to the ground. Steph has no more strength to fight. She's been shot far too many times and lifting the girder off of Bucky had cost more energy than Steph expected.

"You're my friend," Steph says.

She's got to get to Bucky. He's in there somewhere. Buried on the programming and the mission, Bucky's still there.

"You're my mission!" Bucky screams and charges, tackling Steph to the ground.

The Winter Soldier pins her to the ground and begins to punch Steve with all the force he can muster. It hurts. The pain is excruciating. Steph's been punched, but never like this. Maybe it's just because it's Bucky, who once swore on his life to never hit Steph and she the same. Friends don't bodily assault friends, even when mad.

"Then finish it," Steph manages, spitting up some of her own blood.

There's a brief pauses in the punches. Through the haze of pain and blood loss, Steph knows this is her moment. She can see the doubt in Bucky's eyes. This may be the only chance Steph will ever have to break through the Winter Soldier's programming.

"'Cause I'm with you to the end of the line," she chokes out, remembering how Bucky told her after she stubbornly refused his help after her mother's death.

It's almost like their rallying cry – even though Bucky's only ever used it once. It was such a profound moment in Steph's life. It was the moment, she knew that he was really there for the long haul and wasn't going to dump her at the slightest sight of trouble. As Bucky did back then, Steph can't give up Bucky either.

The Winter Soldier jerks forward once with his arm pulled back but falters. He stares at her and Steph knows that it must mean something. Then the crashing helicarrier groans and the situation catches up with them.

Steph's falling and her eyes flutter and all she can see is Bucky staring at her with a blank expression as he hangs on to a girder. She hits the water hard, but the pain is blurring together.

'So this it. This is how I die,' Steph thinks.

The world is spinning and before it all goes black, she hears a splash and sees the glint of something metal.

Steph wakes up in an actual hospital for the first time in her life. The shield is leaning against her bed on the left and Sam's on the right. Soft music fills the room. Steph exhales in relief. She's surrounded by the person and item that she can always count on to always watch her back.

"On your left," she whispers.

Sam grins. She half expects him to berate her for being stupid but he merely smiles at her, happy to see she's awake.

Once Steph's out of the hospital she knows what she's got do. Everyone is going their separate ways and this time SHIELD isn't going to be there to bring them back together. Fury goes off the grid in Europe and Natasha disappears entirely. Sam sticks with Steph though, as she expected him to. Together they're going to find Bucky.

Sam's doubtful at Steph's theory that Bucky pulled her to shore. There was no sign that anyone had walked away from the spot where she had been found. Steph's adamant though. It had to be Bucky. How else would she have ended up on the shore?

Sam goes with her anyway.

Steph's first stop is New York. They need a base of operations and since Tony so graciously offered her an entire floor of her tower after New York, she heads there.

"Welcome back, Captain Rogers," Jarvis greets as they ride up the elevator.

"Thank you, Jarvis," Steph replies back putting away the 'Avengers' card Tony had foisted on her. "I'm sure you've already let Tony know we've arrived."

"Of course," Jarvis says and Steph can almost hear a scoff in the AI's voice.

"Who's Jarvis?" Sam asks.

"He's an AI and he kind of runs everything around here," Steph explains even though she doesn't fully understand Jarvis herself.

She figures if Jarvis has a problem with her explanation, he will correct her. They arrive at the top floor of the tower and Sam is slightly overwhelmed by the grandeur of it all.

"Cap!" Tony greets walking over from the bar where he had been fiddling with something. "How wonderful of you to drop by. Couldn't call when I was getting blown up or when you were getting blown up? Did you get my flowers?"

Steph rolls her eyes.

"I did and they were very nice. Although they only had Pepper's name on them," Steph replies.

"Pepper!" Tony gasps spinning to turn stare at Pepper who's sitting on the couch tapping at a Stark Pad.

"Hi Steph," Pepper greets distractedly, completely ignoring Tony.

"Kidding," Steph laughs.

And Tony gapes at her.

"Hi, Pepper," Steph answers Pepper.

"Don't do that," he says narrowing his eyes. "And who's this?"

"Sam Wilson," Sam greets holding out his hand.

Tony takes it and they shake firmly.

"I saw what you were doing on the news and let me tell you this about that, I'm going to build you a brand new set of even better wings," Tony says excitedly. "I've already drawn up plans."

"Really?" Sam says gleefully.

Steph sighs.

"Tony that's not why we're here," Steph says.

Tony pouts slightly but turns his back and walks back to the bar.

"The Winter Soldier – you're insane mission is to go find him."

"Pretty much. I was hoping the offer for a floor was still open. I kind of need the space," Steph says.

Tony spins to look at her.

"I can do even better than just giving you a living space."

As if from nowhere, holographic images appear and Tony flicks them to face Steph. A familiar face looks at her.

"Is that?"

"Your Winter Solider. When you told me you were coming, I took the liberty of having facial recognition software across the country search for a match. You're in luck because I found a few. He's still in the States."

"Really?" Steph asks breathlessly. "I thought for sure he'd be gone."

"Well he was still Washington up until two days ago. Says he's in New York now," Tony trails off.

"Do you think this means?" Sam asks.

"He did call me his mission," Steph says awkwardly, her initial surprise dying.

"But is he trying to kill you or not?" Tony questions, tapping his fingers on his chin.

"If he wanted to kill me he could have done it while I was in the hospital or sleeping in my apartment, which he knows the location of," Steph replies.

Tony has a funny twist of his lips.

"Maybe you should just stay put, Cap. Maybe he'll come to you. I'll just amp up security for the entire tower."

"Let me know the moment he leaves New York," Steph directs.

"Aye-aye."

Tony gets no hits for a few weeks and Steph's getting antsy. She lives in the tower and becomes accustomed to the finding several of her friends wandering around. (Never Natasha though, no matter how much Steph wants to see her.) She runs into Bruce and they go out for coffee. She spars with Clint and they keep in shape even though they are both unemployed.

Steph, surprisingly, ran into Thor once who was thrilled to see her. They ended up in a discussion of Thor's integration into Midardigan Entertainment. Thor and Steph's steps into modern culture, is quite similar. They bond over, less frequent, missed references and regaling tales of the places they come from.

Sam sticks around, taking a leave of absence from work in DC. He makes friends with Clint, both of them bonding over their mutual distaste for Tony's bird jokes. He also keeps fit with Steph and Clint, while playing guinea pig for Tony's new prototype wings. Steph's sure, once the wings are complete, Sam will want to jump right right into Avengers' business.

Steph keeps up with online profiles. People always want to talk to Captain America. They always want to know what's up and what's she eating and if she punched anyone lately.

(Usually a balanced meal, which Steph stresses is important for everyone. And generally Clint cooks.)

Steph tweets and post a picture once a day to keep the masses happy. It's usually some inane and has nothing to do with what's she actually doing but people eat it up. Actively letting people know what she's up to, is freeing for Steph. The tiny actions give her the ability to prove that Steph Rogers is a real person who does stuff just like everyone else.

She draws a lot more. Mostly Bucky. The whole ordeal has ripped a hole in her chest that she had spent two years painstakingly healing. It hurts more than ever. It's an ache that she can't make go away. Not now that she knows that Bucky is out there. Thinking that Bucky is dead allows Steph to believe that he's in a better place. Knowing he's alive and a victim to whomever turned him into the Winter Solider, is worse than think he's dead.

"We're you and Barnes doing the horizontal tango?" Tony asks off handedly at dinner one time.

Tony decreed with Steph now living in the tower, they must have a more 'wholesome family environment.' Thus group dinners became a thing. Steph argues that she isn't some prude and has seen her fair share of shit – using shit for emphasis – but Tony just laughs her off. Steph thinks Tony just really wants to have big, family dinners. (They all take turns cooking. Clint surprisingly turns out to be a decent cook.)

Clint chokes on his chicken and his fork clatters noisily onto the table. Bruce rubs soothing circles on Clint's back.

"Tony," Pepper says, exasperated.

"I've been dying to know," Tony says, exaggerating the 'dying.' "The old man thought you were. I want to put the nail in that coffin. Know something he didn't."

"Howard thought Bucky and I were…" Steph trails off in disbelief.

"Said you two lived out each others' pockets and were constantly touching. Said it was at least obvious that you two were in love with each from the way you looked at each other."

Steph turns pink. She suddenly doesn't feel very hungry either.

"No we weren't," Steph says very quietly and takes a deep breath. "I'm going to go back to my room. The chicken was very good, Clint. Thank you."

Steph hurries to her floor. She doesn't have long until someone's going to come check on her. She wants some time alone before she gets swallowed up by everyone else making sure she's okay. Steph hates it when they treat her like a glass doll. Just because she lost everything doesn't mean she's going to shatter. There's been years of adjustment.

"They say you're a man," Bucky says as Steph enters her bedroom and turns on the lights.

She freezes. He's just sitting on her bed. His hair is in a ponytail and he's wearing a ball cap. His eyes still lack the recognition and it makes Steph's heart hurt, but Bucky's there. He's alive and safe.

"It was a cover up," Steph says slowly not moving from the doorway. "I was told that the American people wanted their war hero to be man."

"And you went along? I don't understand," Bucky whispers.

His eyes are glassy and dark bags are under his eyes. The remains of Hydra and other contenders are no doubt scrambling to get their greedy hands on the Winter Soldier, thus Bucky must be constantly on the move and barely sleeping.

"I wanted to be there on the frontlines, serving my country. It's the only way I could do it."

Bucky doesn't say anything.

"I – I spent a lot of time at the exhibit on Captain America," Bucky says, spitting out Captain America. "I share the same face as your friend, James Buchanan Barnes."

"Yeah, you do," Steph murmurs.

"Was I him?"

"You'd be the one to know," Steph says. "But I think you were."

"I am not him now," Bucky replies. "But I sometimes get flashes."

"Oh?"

"Short memories, sometimes dreams. You're often there. You're smaller though."

"I was once pretty small," Steph explains. "I got a serum that made me Captain America."

Bucky nods jerkily.

"It says that at the museum."

"Do you have anywhere to go?" Steph asks.

Bucky looks sick. Steph thinks he'll need several showers to remove all the grime and dirt that has accumulated on Bucky's skin.

Bucky shrugs.

"I don'y know what I'm supposed to do now," he admits.

"You could stay here," Steph offers.

"I'm not the man you knew," he says sharply.

"I know, but you could stay here. You're free to leave at anytime. At least stay to get better."

Bucky nods.

"Come on I'll get you something to eat."

"You mean to tell me you're harbouring a dangerous assassin and feeding him goldfish crackers?" Tony asks incredulously, when Steph refuses to let him onto her floor.

"Yeah and I don't want to scare him off, so the rest of you need to let us be."

"Steph, you're in danger. He was programmed to kill you."

"But he won't, he already tried, you gotta trust me, Tony."

Tony sighs.

"That's the worst part, I do. Just if he tries to kill remember Jarvis hears all."

"Got it. Thanks, Tony."

"Everyone is uneasy because of my presence," Bucky says, sitting on the couch.

He looks better after several showers and found better clothes for him to wear. Steph imagines if he were Bucky, he would have been complaining about the gross misuse of water.

"Just a little," Steph says. "But that's okay. Don't worry about them. Worry about you."

"I don't need to," Bucky replies mechanically.

Steph sighs.

"It's getting late, we should probably sleep. You can have my room," Steph says.

"Where will you sleep?" Bucky questions but gets up, following Steph's directions.

Steph uses her thumb to point at the couch.

"Gotta pullout bed, it's pretty handy."

Bucky nods and takes his leave to the bedroom. Steph doesn't follow him even though she wants too. She wants to coddle him and wrap him up in her arms until he remembers. She has a feeling that wouldn't be a very good idea though.

Bucky lives with her for a few weeks. He's mostly quiet and shuffles around Steph's floor. He becomes more adventurous as time passes and explores more and does more things on his own.

After the first week, Steph feels comfortable leaving him alone. She's confident he can take care of himself. She's careful not to call him Bucky and catches herself on almost slips. Bucky's eyes narrow when he catches her. He reminds her that he is not who he once was.

He remembers more every day, but it's usually not a lot. And each day it gives Steph more confidence that Bucky won't leave. He chose to stay with her before he knew anything, he must want to continue to stay with her if he remembers more and becomes more familiar.

Steph's catching up on her Facebook fanpage one morning while Bucky's fixing himself a bowl of cereal in the kitchen. Steph's quite proud that Bucky's become so independent when before he could only do what he was ordered to do. Suddenly a bowl clatters to the floor.

Steph leaps to her feet, instincts kicking in, and whips around to face Bucky. His eyes are blown wide open and he's staring off into space. It's like he's a statue.

"Hey, are you okay?" Steph asks, stepping towards him.

She doesn't want to trigger some instinct so she doesn't touch him.

"What happened to Gracie?" Bucky asks.

"Gracie?" Steph asks.

She wracks her brain trying to remember why the name was familiar. The image of the beautiful girl with perfect everything sketched itself out in Steph's mind.

"I don't know," Steph admits. "You were going steady and then one day you came home and said she was gone. Never talked about her again, until now."

Steph's slightly annoyed that Bucky remembered Gracie before her.

"I liked her," Bucky says quietly.

"Yeah, me too," Steph answers, kneeling down to clean up the spilled cereal.

The next morning when Steph goes to wake up Bucky, he's gone.

Steph decides not to go after him immediately. She wants to wait and see if he'll come back. He's got to. She does, however, asks Tony to keep tabs on Bucky. He periodically emails them to her but Steph doesn't read them. The emails become less frequent as Bucky falls farther off the grid. She thinks it would be best to let Bucky do what he's to do. Eventually, Steph just deletes them all and they stop after that.

No matter how much her chest hurts.

Days trickle by.

Steph draws a lot. Mostly faces of her past. She draws Gracie, with her perfect hair and makeup and wonders what happened to her. Steph thinks that she could easily find Gracie and just ask her what happened to her relationship with Bucky. That would be breaking Bucky's trust, when he non-explicitly years ago asked her to just leave it.

Sam, realizing their short hunt for the Winter Soldier is over, heads back to Washington but tells Steph he's only a text away. He's got a life back in Washington and Steph knows that. She'll miss his company regardless.

(They text back and forth everyday and Steph misses him a lot less.)

She pours far too much time reading over the Winter Solider file. There's so much there but at the same time there's not enough. It's abrupt and doesn't give Steph the solid truth she needs so desperately. The file doesn't give deep details, merely the more basic of information. Date, location, and purpose of mission and whether the mission was a success. The Winter Soldier was always successful.

There is too much time spent holed up in her floor, avoiding everyone. Steph's far too caught up in her own thoughts. The other inhabitants try to drag her out, but Steph doesn't really want to see the world anymore. Not since it swept Bucky away, again.

Belatedly she realizes it's unhealthy to spend so much time lost in thought alone, but she can't bring herself to care. Steph can't bring herself to care much about anything since she let Bucky vanish and decided not follow. Now he's completely off the grid and she has nowhere to even start looking.

Weeks begin to slip through Steph's fingers. The shield stays propped up on the wall, staring at her. It hasn't seen much use lately. Steph starts to get more actively involved in training with it. The more she whips the shield around, Steph begins to realize how badly she needs to get out. Her fingers itch to do something and express the freedom she had fought for.

Exercise and activity prove to be welcome distractions. She has trouble sleeping, but a brief spar with whoever is awake at 4 am (usually Clint) proves to be therapeutic. Sometimes instead of beating up Clint, she drinks tea with Bruce and watch the sunset quietly.

She works on her Winter Soldier research project and still spends far too much time holed up reading up him. She has a board. It connects the possible assassinations attributed to the Winter Soldier over the years, Steph wants to know everything Bucky was forced to do. She wants to know what's going to come back when he remembers.

After two months, Steph tells Tony to stop tracking Bucky. If he comes back, he'll come back and if he doesn't, Steph can't force Bucky to do anything he doesn't want to.

("And you've come to terms with this?" Tony questions, raising an eyebrow.

"No, but he's lost to us now. There's no point in tracking someone who was believed to not have existed up until recently.")

At the five-month mark, there's a big minor crisis (robot army trying to invade New York) and the Avengers are called in. Steph feels alive suiting up with the others; calling them to action and having them follow her orders. She's spent far too much time just sitting around thinking. She's the Woman with a Plan, not the woman who sits around and just thinks.

Steph gets in a tight spot, surrounded by far too many robot drones and won't be able to defend herself completely as they prepare to fire. The others are somewhere else entirely, clearing out civilians and searching for the source. Steph's alone and the drones are creeping closer, their weapons charging.

Pulling up her shield, Steph charges forward in attempt to take out as many enemies as she can before they can fire upon her. She smashes their bodies in with her shield and rips out wiring from their chests with her hands. It's almost a frenzy as she takes out robot after robot.

("We're all clear, Cap," Clint says over the comm.)

Steph looks around and sees that the robots once surrounding her are all destroyed. There are quite a few that she doesn't remember taking out. Upon further inspection, she finds several smartly placed shots through the drones. She brings the bullets in for inspect and Tony announces that they're like nothing he's ever seen. Steph clenches her fists and says, mostly to herself, that Bucky will come to her when he's ready.

Months seem to pass her by and Steph's almost always caught up in the moment. Some crisis that needs the Avengers over here or a someone wants an interview over there (Tony's given Steph a PR manager). Steph has a life in the 21st century now and she isn't bored with it or missing the old days. She has friends; she could possibly even call them her family.

Some days, it's hard. Some days she can't even stand how much she misses Bucky. So hard that she can't even bring herself to leave her room and speak to anyone. Other days it's so faint she can forget it and laugh fully at Clint's successful prank or Bruce's dry comeback for Tony's often failed joke.

It's been a year since Bucky disappeared when Jarvis alerts her that she has a visitor. Steph gets excited. It has to be Bucky. It has to be. She tries not to show her disappointment when it's Natasha.

"Don't look so happy to see me, Cap," Nat says slipping past Steph and into the main room of Steph's floor.

"I just thought you might be Bucky," Steph replies, squaring her shoulders and putting on a smile. "I'm happy you're back too though."

"Me too," Nat replies smiling at her. "I've seen the Avengers have been busy."

"We're lacking a bit on the ground," Steph says.

Nat grins.

"Well, I'm here now. If you'll have me," Nat says quietly.

"You're always welcome, Nat," Steph grins. "So where'd you go?"

"Around," Nat smirks. "I've spent some time here and there doing this and that. I'm done now, ready to be back in the public eye."

"That's not vague at all," Steph says, rolling her eyes.

Nat shrugs and plops down on Steph's couch. She's about to put her feet on the coffee table when Steph clears her throat. Nat freezes and looks at Steph.

"Really?"

"I just cleaned that thing, keep your feet off."

"Stark has cleaning staff you know."

"I feel bad, I'm not doing anything and living rent free. I might as well clean up after myself."

Natasha rolls her eyes and mutters something fondly in Russian.

"Tony tells me that Bucky was here for a little bit and vanished a little over a year ago," Nat comments. "You okay with that? I'm surprised you're not off looking for him."

"He's not too far away," Steph says, not mentioning the several missions she had someone save her skin when she recklessly put herself in a dangerous situation. "I'm okay. Some days are easier than others, but if he knows where to find me if he needs me."

"How can you be so sure he?"

"I'm not. I just – there's a lot between Bucky and I. I think, actually I know, that what we had was real and if Bucky remembered he'd never let me be on my own. He doesn't think I can take care of myself."

Nat laughs.

"Can't imagine the great Steph Rogers being babied by anyone," Nat comments.

"When I was small," Steph says. "And it wasn't babying. Bucky was just protective because I was at risk of getting really sick."

"When you were small," Nat agrees.

They're silent and Steph joins Natasha on the couch. They lean into each other automatically.

"Do you ever miss it?"

"You're going to have to be more specific," Steph says.

"Well I was going to say being small, but if we're going to go down that road let's do what you were thinking too."

"Sometimes I miss being small. Sometimes I still think I'm small. I bang my head all the time and misjudged if I can fit in space. I wake up sometimes thinking I'm small again," Steph confesses. "But people actually listen to someone they have to look in the eye. I don't miss being small because I was sick all the time and people treated me like I was invisible for it. Bucky once told me, after the serum, that everyone is going to see me the way he saw me. Nobody ever saw me the way Bucky did, even if I did gain more respect.

"I don't miss the old days, wither. Not anymore, at least. At first they were all I wanted. I wanted to live the life I dreamed of during the war. Even though I don't know what I would have done with your Bucky. But now I'm here and I can't change that. My life is here. I got to admit, though, there are few people I've grown pretty fond of here too."

"You're a sap, Rogers," Nat grins.

Steph grins.

"Guilty as charged."

"Were you in love with Bucky?" Nat questions.

Steph knows that Nat knows what is behind that question. A funny feeling settles in her stomach. Steph takes a deep breath to calm herself.

"There was this girl named Gracie Williams. She was perfect in every way for Bucky. She was beautiful, smart as a whip, and genuinely liked me. I didn't meet her for a long time, but Bucky would talk about her for ages. The way his eyes would light up as he told how amazing Gracie was. I could hate her when I didn't know her because I could pretend that the moment she met me, she would sneer and Bucky would break up with her and never speak of her again.

"But I met Gracie and she was so happy to meet me. Said she had heard so much about me. I tried to hate her, but I really couldn't. Gracie was just nice and wonderful. The only time she laughed at me was when I called myself an extension of Bucky's family. I still don't get what was so funny because that's what I was. I liked spending time with Gracie, it was nice having more than just one friend.

"But I often found myself comparing myself to Gracie. Our smiles, our hair, our clothes, and our makeup. I wanted so desperately to look like her. I tried too. Bucky ended up coming home from his date with her earlier than expected and I panicked. I scrubbed my face so hard it looked like I had been crying. Bucky took one look at me and thought I had gotten into a fight. He was livid and didn't believe me at first. When I finally managed to get him calm down, he just stared at the ceiling for the rest of the night.

"When I asked about Gracie he said they were done and he didn't want to talk about it. I never learned what happened between them and we never talked about Gracie again. Bucky went back to dating girls who hated me."

Natasha furrows her brow in confusion.

"So to answer your question, yes I was in love with him," Steph confesses.

Natasha nods.

"I'm sorry," she says.

"It's okay. I've had lots of time to come to terms with it."

"Let's watch a movie," Natasha suggests. "What's your favourite so far?"

"I'm a big fan of anything that doesn't star me," Steph answers. "I wanna know your favourite."

The tower gets fuller with Natasha there. Suddenly, Clint and Nat are bickering all the time. Steph's walked in on them once or twice locked in a death match over what to watch or who gets the last glass of milk. Thor's visits become more frequent and he brings with him his friends, Jane Foster and Darcy Lewis occasionally. Steph enjoys the feeling of a full house (or rather, tower).

Dinner is suddenly a requirement and they always have something to talk about even though they all are within always within proximity of each other.

It's easy to tell when there's a fight and tension within the group. Steph has had to intervene more than once because her adult teammates are sometimes childish idiots. She often feels like designated babysitter rather than team leader, but wouldn't change it for the world.

Although Steph has entire floor to herself, she finds herself more often than not leaving her belongings in the others' rooms and vice versa. Steph finds herself quite at ease and living in peace.

(Even though they are constantly dealing with otherworldly threats.)

"Jarvis, tell Tony that if I catch him messing around with Nat's stuff again I won't protect him," Steph sighs as she steps out of her elevator and onto her floor. "I swear they are such children sometimes."

Steph is concerned when she doesn't hear the polite response from Jarvis immediately.

"Jarvis?" she calls. "You there, buddy?"

There is still no response and Steph starts to get concerned. She carefully sweeps the open main room and doesn't spot anything outright wrong, but it's unnerving nonetheless. Steph quickly pulls out her phone and shoots Tony a text asking if there's anything wrong with Jarvis.

there shouldn't be. he's working perfectly fine on all the other levels

i'll check if there's anything wrong

Steph creeps across the room, careful not to make any sound. It may be nothing but she doesn't want take a chance. There are many dangerous people in the world who want her dead.

The shield is in her room, but not the only available line of defense. Steph goes to snatch a gun she had stashed behind the cereal in the cupboard but finds it missing. Her phone goes off the same moment a cold dread pools in her stomach.

there's definitely something blocking your communication with Jarvis on your level. i'm sending romanoff up

There's half a beat of Steph's thudding heart.

don't do anything stupid until she gets there

Steph knows she should run, but has never been one to back down from a fight. She moves silently to her bedroom to hopefully collect her shield. She bats the door open and presses herself against the wall waiting to see if anyone shoots or bursts out.

Nothing happens.

She darts into her room. There's no one there. She grabs the shield and exits just as quickly, once again surveying the room.

trouble in paradise cap, all elevators have been shut down. give me a second, i'm coming up

That's when Steph sees him.

I can handle it, Tony. It's fine. Just focus on getting everything running.

He's lying on the coach, blending into the black couch cushions. Steph wouldn't have seen him on her initial sweep of the floor because of the way the couch is turned.

"Bucky," she calls.

He doesn't move. She carefully approaches him. Bucky's arm is covering most of his face and Steph's note sure how aware of his surroundings he is. She doesn't want to accidently alarm Bucky and cause him to attack her. He's grown quite the beard and his hair is longer and unkempt. He's wearing new clothes but there beaten up and stained in a mixture of things.

"Hey, Buck," she tries again, standing beside the couch, arms lamely at her side.

"There was this night," he says.

Steph winces at his voice. It's gravely and out of use. She wonders if he's been drinking water regularly and eating proper food. She can't tell his mass and build from the layers of clothing he's wearing.

"There were a lot of nights, Bucky," Steph replies, sitting down on the coffee table.

Bucky's arm shifts briefly and Steph catches a glimpse of his eyes. There are dark bags underneath and his eyes themselves quite red. They make eye contact and then the arm is firmly back in place.

"It was winter and very cold out."

"We usually pushed the beds together," Steph adds.

She sees a minute nod and Bucky swallows.

"I had smoked a cigarette after work that day, so we couldn't share the bed. Or you'd have an asthma attack."

Steph swallows and she knows where this story is going.

"You felt bad, but you gave me your blankets. I was so tired but extremely cold," Steph says.

"You fell asleep quickly after that but before you did, you called me something in Irish."

"It wasn't unusual."

Steph thought she had imagined it, but apparently it had been real enough that in the mess of Bucky's memories it had stood out.

"Most of things didn't mean what you said they meant."

"That's true."

"I looked them up, recently. But this one word – I can't find it anywhere."

Bucky's lifts his arm up and sits up. He looks at her with intense eyes. This is his mission right now. He needs to figure out what the meaning behind m'fhíorghrá.

"M'fhíorghrá," the word pours easily off of Steph's tongue and feels like forever since she spoke in her mother's native tongue.

Bucky seems to relax. He nods.

"That one."

"My mother told me it was one of the most passionate terms of endearment she could think of. I don't think she even called my father it," Steph confesses.

"What does it mean?" Bucky hisses, annoyed.

"Two things. 'My true love' is the literal translation," Steph explains. "But I took it for it's more implied meaning. Soul mate."

Bucky grips the edge of the couch. His jaw clenches and Steph can see a war in his eyes. Before either of them can say another word, Iron Man comes smashing through the windows. Bucky snatches a gun from out of nowhere – it's the one Steph kept hidden behind the cereal boxes. He leaps to feat and stands between Steph and Iron Man, pointing the gun at Tony's chest.

Steph tries not to read anything into it. Right in front of her is the best place to get a clear shot and view at Iron Man, relative to where he landed.

When Tony sees that it's Bucky, he lifts his hands up in surrender but doesn't flip the faceplate up – since that's where Bucky is pointing the firearm.

"Tony, I said I could handle it."

"I've long since learned that your definition of 'fine' is skewed," Tony says. "And today's definition is an armed ex-Soviet assassin who mutilated the security for your level. Thanks for that by the way."

Steph can imagine the look that Tony gives Bucky.

"Buck, put down the gun – it's okay," Steph says, stepping forward.

She warily puts a hand on Bucky's shoulder. Bucky tenses and for an awkward few moments, doesn't do anything.

"Please," Steph whispers.

The gun slowly lowers, but Bucky keeps it gripped tightly in his hands.

"Okay, so I'll have to get the windows repaired. For the time being, Cap, you can stay in one of the guest rooms on the tenth floor," Tony says shrugging and exiting the way he came.

She's left alone with Bucky. With the massive hole in the window (the entire wall had been window), the wind easily gets in. The temperature drops several degrees.

"Are you going to leave now?" Steph asks.

Bucky shrugs her hand off his shoulder and takes a few steps forward.

"Just stay for the night. Get some rest and then you can leave again," Steph begs. "One night."

"You didn't follow me when I left. Why?" Bucky rasps.

"I had Tony track you, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't follow you, Buck. I didn't think you were going to leave in the first place. I thought if I just waited you'd come back when you were ready."

"That's not like you," he replies.

"I know," Steph says.

She has itching feeling that she should have followed Bucky. She should have chased him and played the game. Instead she just sat still.

"I'll stay," Bucky says, turning to face her.

Steph lights up.

"For the night," he clarifies. "I still have things to do."

Steph doesn't sleep very much that night. She's waiting to hear Bucky slip out.

When morning comes and she goes to check the room she had left Bucky in – he's gone. The bed is perfectly made, as if no one had slept in it at all. It's too perfect, Steph notes. It's made the way someone who has had military training would make a bed.

It gives her hope.

"There's a fundraiser that you need to be present for, Cap," Pepper announces, sweeping into Steph's studio.

Steph jolts from her painting and looks at Pepper incredulously.

"A fundraiser?" she asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Stark Industry puts together one every couple of months. All proceeds go to a charity," Pepper explains. "Tony figures if we get the Avengers to show up then we'll get more people to come out and thus donate more."

"Sounds more like a Pepper idea," Steph says.

Pepper smiles secretively.

"Anyway I don't know why you are coming to see me personally about this. Tony could've just texted me."

Steph makes a point of grabbing her phone from her pocket and waving it in Pepper's face. She knows that mostly everyone thinks she doesn't even know how to use it (with the exception of Natasha).

"This is a Stark Gala, Steph."

"So?"

"You need to wear something appropriate. Designers are clambering for Captain America to wear their designs. I'm here to personally escort you through hell."

Steph spins back to her painting. It's a self-portrait of when she was selling war bonds.

"Y'know part of the reason Captain America was made a man was because I didn't look very good in the outfits the other girls wore," Steph murmurs.

"They were obviously not catering for your figure then. These designers will make you look good, I'll make sure of it," Pepper promises.

"When do we start?"

Pepper laughs.

"If you follow me, I've got a display set up two floors up," Pepper smiles.

"Why can't I just wear something out of my closet?" Steph complains, shifting from one leg to another.

"Don't move," the designer scolds.

"Because you have no fashion sense," Natasha says firmly, sitting on chair and watching Steph with great amusement.

Pepper is outside taking a call pertaining to official Stark Industries Business.

"Ouch and I thought you were on my side, Nat," Steph pouts.

"I'm on whatever side that doesn't invoke the wrath of Pepper," Natasha grimaces.

"You're telling me an assassin who could kill me with a thread is afraid of Pepper Potts?"

"Don't doubt a woman who can run in heels," Nat says.

"True," Steph says shrugging. "I'll put running in heels on my list."

"Don't move," the designer hisses through the pins in her mouth.

"Sorry," Steph mumbles.

"Have you ever worn heels?" Natasha asks curiously.

"Couldn't afford 'em and then I never had an opportunity too. I wouldn't really call them standard issue, even for Captain America."

"Well, the next free moment we have I'm definitely slapping you in a pair of heels and getting Clint to record it."

"Please don't," Steph sighs.

Natasha just smirks maliciously.

"Okay, I'm finished," the designer announces standing back.

Pepper walks back in at this moment. She rests one hand on her hip and the other on her chin as she examines Steph's dress.

It's pale blue with an illusion neckline and the fabric has several layers, ruffling subtly and pooling around her ankles.

Natasha watches Pepper as she takes in Steph's dress.

"Perfect," Pepper announces after a few tense moments. "Do you like it, Steph?"

Steph looks at herself in the mirror and nods.

"I've never owned a nice dress before," Steph says.

The fundraiser is boring. Steph's got to make small talk with people she grew up despising. Captain America is a character before a hero, before an actual person, so Steph can easily plaster a smile on her face and pretend that everything is okay.

The Avengers are decked out in their best duds and Steph suspects that she wasn't the only one who had a helping had à la Pepper Potts.

Steph diligently holds a flute of champagne, drinking from it every so often as she listens to people natter at her. For the first time in a long time, she wishes she could get drunk. Maybe if she could get drunk, the conversations would become a little more bearable.

"-and the boys from the country club all started laughing," a man concludes.

Steph smiles thinly at him. He's waiting for a response but she wasn't quite listening to his story to give him anything appropriate.

"I need to borrow Captain Rogers for a moment," Clint cuts in urgently, putting a firm hand on Steph's bicep.

When they're out of earshot, Steph looks at Clint in alarm.

"Is everything alright?" she questions worriedly.

Clint shakes his head.

"You were looking like you might break that guy's arm if he said anything else," Clint replies easily. "Decided that you might need a helping hand. Show you were the real party is at."

Clint leads her to a table in the corner where Natasha and Bruce are seated.

"Seems like a real party," Steph says sarcastically.

"Hey, we are having a great time!" Clint says defensively, slipping into a chair with Natasha.

"We have cards," Natasha winks, pulling out a deck of cards.

"Guess that's better than mingling," Steph drawls.

"I find them quite dry too," Bruce says.

"We can't stay here too long or else Pepper will find us," Clint says. "We've already been booted once back onto the floor once."

Steph sighs.

"I'm going to get a drink even though it will have no effect. Anybody want anything?"

They all shake their heads and turn in as Nat starts to deal out cards. Steph makes her way across the floor to the bar, hopefully she won't be intercepted on her way. Thor's laughter booms across the room and Steph is happy at least on Avenger is having a good time.

Steph is never destined to make it to the bar as someone cuts in and starts talking to her about possibly attending a party they're having in a week. She does her best not to let her shoulder's slump and plasters a smile on her face, promising she'll look into it with her publicist. (Steph doesn't have a publicist.)

There's a tap on her shoulder and Steph turns to see Bucky. His hair is cut neatly, his beard is trimmed, and he's acquired a well-fitting suit. Steph is suddenly hit by the image of Bucky charming all the girls back in the day, dressed in best clothes even though he had to work. Steph's at a loss for words.

"Sorry to interrupt, Senator, but I believe this is our song. I'm going to have to steal the lady for a dance," Bucky says smoothly.

Bucky offers Steph a hand and she talks it willingly. Bucky leads her out into the dance floor and they enveloped within the crowd of other dancing couples.

"I ain't a lady," Steph says finally with no bite.

"So you keep telling me," Bucky says with a glint in his dark eyes.

They dance in silence. Pepper had previously gotten Steph a coach on how to dance (or at least not step on someone's toes) before the gala.

"Why are you here?" Steph asks after the song ends and another picks up.

They're still dancing, one arm rest on top of his and her other hand clasped with his.

"I can't stay away," Bucky admits. "I keep running away because I can't face you but you keep calling me back with everything that I remember."

"And what do you remember?"

"Some, not all. I mostly remember those I killed, their faces right before their lives shuttered out," Bucky squeezes his eyes shut and his grip tightens on Steph. "I remember flashes from before – with us."

"Yeah?" Steph swallows hard. "So does that mean you'll stay?"

"I think so," Bucky replies. "If you want me."

"Of course I do, Buck. Why would you even question it?"

"I'm not a good person, Steph. I've done a lot of bad things."

"That wasn't you."

Bucky doesn't respond.

"Did you remember what happened with Gracie?" Steph asks.

Bucky shakes his head. His grip relaxes ever so slightly and Steph knows that he's lying. She doesn't push the issue.

Bucky stays. He shares Steph's floor with her. They use to share everything. What was Steph's was also Bucky's and vice versa. Bucky tentatively picks up on the offer that what's Steph's is still also his. They use to live out of each other's pockets.

They do share now too, but it's not the same. Both of them are walking on glass around each other. Steph hates the tension.

Bucky wakes up screaming. It's 1 am, Steph had been asleep for about two hours.

Steph charges into his room, shield ready. The lights flash on the moment she does and all she sees is Bucky sitting in the middle of the bed, covered in sweat.

"It was just a nightmare," Bucky says. "It's okay."

Steph props the shield against the wall and moves closer, but just a little.

"It's not okay. You're not okay," she says.

"It was just a nightmare," Bucky repeats.

"Tell me," Steph says. "Let me carry your burdens, Buck. I can help."

Bucky draws his knees up to his chest.

"I can't, Steph."

"Can I sit?" Steph asks.

"It's your bed," Bucky replies.

"It's your bed," Steph answers. "Mine's out there."

She sits anyways, careful to keep a distance between them.

"How long are you going to sleep out there?" Bucky asks.

"Until I can get my studio remade into a bedroom. Tony said he'll do it do sometime next week," Steph says, shrugging.

"We could get a second bed in here and share the room like before," Bucky whispers. "So you don't have to lose your studio."

"I can paint wherever, Buck. I don't need a whole room for it. 'Sides I wanna give you your space."

"Fuck space. All you've been giving me is space. I'm not going to break," Bucky growls, uncurling himself a little bit.

Steph smiles a little.

"Okay, I'll get Tony to cancel that order and I'll order an Ikea bed or something."

"What's Ikea?" Bucky questions.

"It's this huge furniture store. I'll take you one day," Steph yawns. "I should probably catch a few more hours. I have an early start tomorrow. Try to get some sleep, Bucky."

"Okay," Bucky replies.

Steph gets up and leaves the room, forgetting her shield. When she gets up at 6 am, Bucky is sitting in the kitchen, reading a book. She doesn't think he went back to sleep.

Bucky wakes up screaming. It's 3 am. Steph has just got home. There was an extraterrestrial attack in Chicago. She just wants to drop dead on her pull out bed and sleep for the next week. She hears the screaming the moment she gets the elevator and breaks into a run.

Bucky is standing in the middle of the room, a few things are knocked over and he's got a wild look in his eyes.

"Buck?" she asks, stepping into the room.

He looks at her and his shoulders immediately relax.

"Another nightmare?" she asks.

He nods and moves to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"You have blood on your uniform," he says instead and his voice is thick with sleep.

"Yeah, I got hit. Nothin' to big."

"They aren't watching your back out there," Bucky accuses looking at her with dark, angry eyes.

"They watch my back just fine, Buck."

"Don't call me that," he snaps.

"Okay. What do you want me to call you?"

"I – I don't know."

"Can I sit with you? Until you're ready to go back to sleep?"

Bucky edges over a little bit and Steph takes a seat. Their thighs press together. Steph slowly reaches over and wraps her gloved hand over Bucky's.

"When we were younger, I use to have trouble sleeping. You'd sit with me the whole night and try to sing your mother's lullabies to me."

"Did it work?"

Steph chuckles.

"You have a terrible voice, but it worked."

"Are you going to sing me a lullaby?"

"If you want."

Bucky shakes his head.

"That's good news, I don't know any."

Bucky laughs slightly.

"I remember this night where we went to the roof of a building and stayed out all night watching the stars. You didn't get sick," Bucky replies.

"It was my 19th birthday," Steph fills in. "The power was out throughout the city and the heat was almost unbearable. The night was cool though and the visibility the best we had ever seen. It was a good night."

"Yeah, it was," Bucky replies.

Steph squeezes his hand and they sit there until dawn, the sun rising at their backs. Steph falls asleep sometime, her head on Bucky's shoulder. When she wakes, Bucky's head is on hers and their hands are still pressed against each other.

Bucky wakes up screaming and Steph is sleeping in the bed across from his. It's a little ridiculous but it makes them both happy.

"Will you sleep with me?" Bucky asks when the lights turn on.

The sheets are twisted around his ankles and the pillows on the floor. Steph picks them up and straightens the sheets and slips in next to Bucky. There is some awkward shuffling and bumping of limbs before they manage to fit together. Steph curls around Bucky holding him place with her arms.

Steph's alarmed at how easily they fit against each other. It's as if they're still in that tiny Brooklyn apartment. She can feel Bucky's heart thudding in his chest.

"Sleep a bhuanchara," she whispers into his ear.

"What does that mean?" he murmurs.

"My enduring friend, now sleep," she says.

Bucky does.

They sleep curled around each other more often than not. It helps Bucky sleep to have another presence grounding him. He still wakes up screaming and the nightmares don't stop. It's easier for Bucky to calm down when he has a grounding presence nearby. Sometimes he needs space, so Steph leaves him to sleep in her own bed, pressed against the other side of the room.

Things are working out.

Steph is standing in the washroom, running her fingers through her frustratingly long hair. She's not quite sure what to do it. It's becoming increasingly difficult to tie the hair up for when Steph needs to jump into action. Long hair is not a good thing to have waving out freely – no matter how cool it looks – in a fight.

"I should just cut it all off again," Steph grumbles as she begins to braid it. "I'm going through hair care products like nobody's business."

"I'm kind of surprised you grew it out," Bucky says, he's leaning against the door frame.

"Don't you know how to knock?" Steph deadpans.

"Door was open and I could hear you grumbling from the couch," Bucky says.

"I don't think I ever let my hair get this long before. Ma always cut it off," Steph says offhandedly. "She always took care of my hair."

Steph's fingers slip distractedly while braiding and she ends up with a knot.

"Dammit," she mumbles and starts to backtrack.

"Can I braid it?" Bucky asks, almost shyly.

Steph pauses and meets his eyes in the mirror's reflection. His eyes are unreadable but he has a tiny smile on his face.

"Of course," she says.

Bucky steps forward and gently takes Steph's hair into his hands. She watches him through the mirror. Extreme focus is on his face, the one she saw whenever he was lining up a shot or as the Winter Soldier focuses on his mission.

His fingers move quickly and weave the braid tightly. About halfway through, Bucky suddenly stops and, again, meets Steph's eyes in the mirror.

"I could kill you," Bucky whispers. "I'm in complete control. I can think of at least 20 different ways with just my bare hands."

"Bucky, I trust you," Steph replies.

She refuses to let Bucky try and unnerve her to prove some twisted point. He is worth it, Steph refuses to let Bucky to see himself as a villain.

"Why?" Bucky demands. "I'm not Bucky from Brooklyn. I'm not him, so why would you trust me?"

"You've saved my life, as this new person. You came back to me and I've slept next to you. Buck, there's been a thousand and one chances for you to kill me in much easier circumstances. Here in this bathroom, I'd at least have a chance. I trust you, Bucky. Don't doubt that."

Bucky doesn't respond and refuses to meet her eyes as he finishes braiding her hair. He backs off and smiles softly at his handiwork. Steph's got to admit, his improved vastly from their childhoods. Steph turns to face him, but doesn't really have any words.

"I trust you too," Bucky finally answers and exits the washroom.

Steph finds herself smiling stupidly in the bathroom much longer than necessary.

"Gracie Williams passed away last week," Steph says from the couch.

"Huh?" Bucky asks from the kitchen.

"Come see, her obituary is right here. I guess I should call her Gracie Hansen."

Bucky pads over and leans over the couch, his head hovering above Steph's shoulder.

"Look at that," he murmurs.

"Married with four kids and six grandkids, looks like James Barnes didn't detract from her love life."

"I guess not," Bucky shrugs and pushes back from the couch.

Steph can hear him pouring a bowl of cereal.

"We should send flowers, I really liked her," Steph muses.

"She was pretty great," Bucky hums distractedly.

"I mean, I'd like to go to her funeral but I'd hate to cause a scene," Steph says.

"She liked azaleas, purple ones," Bucky says as he plops down on the couch beside Steph.

"You'll wreck the furniture that way," Steph scolds. "I'll ask Pepper for a good florist."

Bucky nods and grabs the remote to turn on the television.

"Do you remember Gracie yet?" Steph questions.

Bucky shrugs and shoves a heaping spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

"She broke up with me," Bucky says. "Not much to say."

"I thought she really liked you," Steph mumbles, looking at the paper. "She was one of the only girls you were pretty serious about."

"She did – it's just I wasn't that into her and she could tell."

Steph shoves the paper into her lap.

"How could you not be into her? I was into her!" Steph gapes. "She was smart and funny and genuine."

Bucky shrugs again and looks straight at the television.

"She just wasn't what I was looking for," Bucky says. "And I thought I told you that I didn't want to talk about it."

"Oh," Steph's mouth snaps shut. "Sorry."

It's very domestic, how Steph and Bucky are living. Despite have more roommates, space, suffering from Soviet brainwashing, and being in the 21st century, it's almost as if they never left their Brooklyn apartment.

They spend a lot of time within close proximity of each other, whether they are aware of it or not. If they're in the same room, there's never more than a couple of feet between them. Bucky and Steph are always sitting next to each other and everyone else is very aware of this. They are often in silence or sharing a short, quiet talk. The two of them just gravitate towards each other; it's just the way it's always been.

Steph and Bucky go out. They explore the new New York together and Bucky often remembers something new from these experiences. Steph's eager whenever he remembers something new but is careful not to push him.

Pepper sets up Bucky with a psychiatrist and with someone to talk to, Bucky becomes lighter. Bucky keeps a little journal beside the bed, which he writes in each night as per his psychiatrist's orders. He's very secretive about it and though Steph is very curious to know what he writes about, she will never break Bucky's fragile trust.

"You and Steph sure are close," Steph hears Clint say to Bucky in the main room as they exit the elevator from her studio.

"She's my best friend," Bucky responds after a pause.

"I dunno, I don't know if me and my best friend share a bed," Clint replies.

Steph's brush stroke pauses as she waits for Bucky's response.

"You're obviously not best friends enough," Bucky snips.

"Nat and I are best friends enough," Clint snaps. "We share a bed occasionally."

"So then what's the problem?"

"We don't share a bed every night and cuddle with each other."

Steph tries to focus on her painting. She shouldn't be listening in on this conversation. They're just being so loud.

"I really don't understand what the big deal is," Bucky grumbles.

Steph hears the fridge open and rummaging around.

"Y'know Tony's old man thought you and Steph were totally fucking," Clint says with a smug tone.

"Well we weren't and we aren't," Bucky snaps. "You are testing my patience, Barton."

The fridge door slams shut. Steph winces and really hopes Bucky wasn't using his metal arm. The fridge door is not reinforced.

"I just want to know what exactly your relationship with Steph is. It's rather ambiguous to everyone else."

"Well join the fucking club, Barton," Bucky snaps.

Steph, too, is confused on the exact nature of the relationship with Bucky.

"Let's just go and spar. I feel like beating the shit out of something," Bucky says, frustrated.

"Can you just use punching bags this time? I didn't even get a hit in last time," Clint complains as his voice fades back into the elevator.

Steph feels guilty about listening on the conversation but doesn't say anything about it to Bucky, even though she knows she should.

Steph hasn't spent a lot of time with Sam in the past few months. They meet up every couple of weeks but the truth is, Sam's life is in DC and her life is in New York. She misses the company he offers and plans to head over to stay with him for a couple of weeks.

("Don't destroy New York when I'm gone," she half jokingly tells the rest of the team.

"Pepper will keep us in check," Bruce promises solemnly.

"I'm only a phone call away but if I have to come back for any reason other than a life threatening one – I will not be very happy."

"Yes mother," Clint and Tony say at the same time.

Natasha slaps them over the head.

"Say hi to Sam for me. Tell him he should come to New York more often.")

Steph ends up taking Bucky with her since he a) doesn't sleep very well on his own and b) asked to come along. They pack up a car and head over to Washington. It's only a four-hour road trip but a road trip nonetheless.

Bucky tries to put his feet on the dash, but Steph shoots him a look that has him pouting for at least a half an hour. They listen to a mix of music back from their time and some CD that Tony and Clint had put together claiming that it 'summed up music from before she was frozen to just before she was thawed.'

Bucky stares out the window for a majority of the trip, AC blowing in his face. Steph has to admit; it makes him look somewhat akin to a puppy.

"This is nice," Bucky comments just after the two-hour mark. "I've never been able to just enjoy traveling before."

"We could take a longer road trip, if you'd like," Steph offers. "Visit the Grand Canyon."

"Wouldn't the Avengers need you?"

"They could do without me for a little bit. Let's call these next few weeks a trial period."

Bucky chuckles.

"I'll be surprised if they don't burn down the tower. You're like team babysitter sometimes, Steph," Bucky says.

"I had the same thought, a little while back," Steph answers. "But it's really great. They're all great."

"I'm glad," Bucky says.

Steph glances over and Bucky's smiling at her.

"What?"

"I dunno, you just never made friends easily before and now you have all these great friends," Bucky says.

"They are pretty great," Steph agrees. "But they aren't great as the jerk sitting next to me."

Bucky snorts.

"You're a punk."

Steph grins. Bucky turns back to watching out the window. Steph just hums along to the radio.

"I don't have room for both of you," Sam says as he opens the door. "I only have on spare bedroom."

"Sorry I didn't warn you beforehand," Steph says apologetically. "I was kind of caught up in just getting here. Don't worry about it though – Buck and I can share."

Sam raises an eyebrow. His eyes go from Steph to Bucky and back to Steph as the two of them step inside.

"So are you two like a … thing?" Sam asks.

Steph laughs awkwardly, recalling the conversation she overheard between Bucky and Clint.

"No it's nothing like that. Bucky just sleeps better when he has someone with him," Steph says. "Right Buck?"

Bucky is a silent, his eyes sweeping over Sam's place. His shoulders are tense.

"I'll sleep on the couch," Bucky says after a beat.

"Wait, Bucky," Steph says.

"I can sleep on my own, Steph," Bucky snaps.

"Ooookay," Sam says. "Why don't you just put your stuff in the guest bedroom and we can deal with this later. I'm sure you're hungry from the trip up; I've got some burgers I can throw on the grill. I don't know about you, Bucky but Steph eats like an animal."

Steph punches Sam lightly in the shoulder.

"I was hungry, okay? One tends to get hungry when there have been multiple attempts on their life."

Sam laughs.

"I could go for something to eat. Steph only packed vegetables and fruit for the trip up," Bucky shrugs.

"No road trip snacks?" Sam says, appalled. "That's awful. A crime against humanity, almost."

"It's bad for you!" Steph says defensively.

Sam and Bucky both scoff.

"It's not like it would matter with metabolisms like ours," Bucky says.

"Alright, on the way back we can get something else," Steph concedes.

It's late. Sam and Steph spent most of the night snipping back and forth, while Bucky just watched. After dinner, Steph offered to the dishes but Sam told her that once they started to get on his nerves she'd have to earn her keep, but for now they were guests. Sam got a blanket and pillow for Bucky and bid them a goodnight with a heavy yawn.

Steph putts her stuff in the empty dresser in the guest room before going to bed. She didn't have time to do so earlier and wants to get comfortable as soon as possible. Bucky's bag, messily rifled through as he took what he needed for the night, sits in the corner. (Bucky didn't want to leave his mess in the middle of Sam's living room.) Steph contemplates putting it with her stuff in the drawers, put inevitably decides against it. She thinks it would make Bucky uncomfortable,

There's a knock on her door as she bends down to put her pants in the bottom drawer.

"Come in," she calls and turns to see Bucky standing in the entranceway.

There's a pillow tucked under his arm. His hair is mussed up and he's got an embarrassed frown on his face. Steph can't help but thinks he looks adorable.

"I can't sleep on that couch," he says. "It hurts my back."

Steph rolls her eyes.

"Well you're welcome to share the bed," she says.

"Sorry about earlier," Bucky says, throwing his pillow on the bed. "It's just Clint said something awhile back and it's really been bothering me.

"It's okay," Steph says.

The bed is smaller than the one back in Stark Tower so they really have to squeeze to fit. Steph turns off the lights and they settle in. Tonight, Bucky is curled around her, metal arm cool against her bare skin. She's tired from driving and really just wants a good sleep before she and Sam go for their jog in a handful of hours.

"Did you know everyone thinks we're doing it?" Bucky says, trying to be casual.

Steph sighs and pushes Bucky away from her. She turns on the light and stares at him. Bucky smiles sheepishly.

"Do you really wanna talk about this now or do you wanna wait until morning?" he says.

"Well I'm wide awake now, so now it's happening now," Steph says.

"So yeah, Clint says that everyone told me that everyone thinks we're fucking," Bucky says.

"I've thought as much," Steph replies. "Howard thought so too."

"Yeah Clint told me," Bucky says.

Steph is quiet for a few moments.

"What is it?" Bucky asks. "It's a little ridiculous don't you think. Like who would ever think that we are in relationship? I mean us?"

Bucky gets a little hysterical at the end.

"It's just that I heard your conversation with Clint the other day. I was in my studio and I knew I shouldn't have listened, but you were so loud," Steph blurts.

"Oh," Bucky whispers. "So you heard that. Clint's been poking at me about that for awhile."

"So what are we, Buck?" Steph asks. "Everyone else is confused about what we are. We're confused about what we are."

"Why can't we just be Steph and Bucky like we were before?" Buck questions.

"Because we aren't just Steph and Bucky anymore," Steph says sadly.

"I wish we were," Bucky says. "How did this happen to us? Two kids from Brooklyn are now two of the most famous and infamous people on the planet."

"If I recall, one of your goals was to be famous," Steph laughs.

"I don't remember that," Bucky replies.

"Oh, sorry," Steph says quickly.

"No, it's okay," Bucky says.

They're silent for a long while.

"Gracie broke up with me because she said I was looking for you in her," Bucky says suddenly. "She said that she couldn't be with someone who was so obviously in love with someone else."

"She once laughed at me because I said you thought of me as one of your siblings," Steph counters.

"I guess we aren't projecting the wrong thing to other people," Steph says, attempting to put what had happened into words. "It's like everyone else got it, except for us."

"God, we're so fucking stupid," Bucky laughs.

"I guess we are," Steph laughs too.

Steph brings her hand above the covers and lays it between them. Bucky does the same and they press their palms together and entwine their fingers.

"We've been doin' this since the first moment we met," Bucky says. "I don't remember all of it, but I know we're always close and touching each other. Like do normal friends do that?"

"We're not normal friends, we're Steph and Bucky," Steph answers easily.

Steph strokes her thumb along Bucky's palm. They sit there quietly for a few minutes.

"Oh my god!" Sam yells through the wall. "Just fucking admit that you're in love with each other and go to sleep!"

Steph laughs.

"Well?" she says looking at Bucky.

"Stephanie Grace Barnes," Bucky begins.

"This isn't a wedding proposal, Buck," Steph says.

"Just let the man speak!" Sam cries. "The sooner you two get through this, the faster I can sleep. And as a courtesy, but I think you know this already, these walls are paper thin."

Bucky sighs.

"Steph, I don't remember when it happened, but I have a feeling it's been forever. I love you. I love you so much."

"Bucky, I love you too," Steph replies. "I'm a little at a loss for words. I never thought this would actually happen."

"Same."

"This doesn't change anything, right?"

"Maybe just a little," Bucky says and grins deviously.

He moves forward and kisses Steph. It's chaste and short.

"Okay let's go to sleep now," Bucky yawns, pulling away.

Steph laughs lightly and leans over to turn the light. They curl up around each other and fall asleep easily – as if nothing has changed.

Because it really hasn't.

Steph and Sam go out for a run in the morning – before sunrise. Despite their late night, they are chipper and eager to get running. Bucky is not a morning person and upon seeing the lack of sun yanked the blanket back over himself and promptly fell back asleep.

Sam and Steph stand in front of Sam's house, stretching in the cool morning air, when Sam turns and looks at Steph.

"I promised myself I wasn't going to ask this, but were you two really that oblivious?" Sam asks.

Steph shrugs and kicks back her leg to perform a few lunges. She twists her upper half, pausing to look at Sam.

"We always loved each other and we weren't afraid to show it," Steph replies. "I guess we just didn't realize how encompassing it was."

Sam nods, smiling as he joins Steph in her lunges.

"You know your pals back in New York have a bet right?" Sam says.

Steph shakes her head, laughing.

"No, but it doesn't surprise me. We're always betting about things. Have you already sent them the news?"

Sam shakes his head and grins deviously.

"Can I ask you a huge favour?"

"You're part of it too?" Steph groans.

"I could get a ton of money of one of the richest men in the world, of course I got in that action!" Sam exclaims as if it's wrong that Steph even had to ask.

"What did you have?"

"I definitely it would've been on your birthday, a little Fourth of July surprise, yanno?" Sam shrugs.

Steph shakes her head, chuckling.

"So you want me to set up a fake 'new' relationship so you can win a bet with Tony?"

Sam nods.

"It's only like two months," Sam says.

"I'll tell you what," Steph says slowly, stopping her stretches and checking her watch.

Sam grins and nods.

"If you can get back to the house before I do, I'll do it," Steph grins and takes off.

"Oh come on!" Sam cries chasing after her.

Steph cackles for at least a lap.

The weeks with Sam fly by and soon Steph and Bucky find themselves packing up the car (with Sam approved 'road trip snacks') and preparing to head back to New York.

"Wish I could stay longer, Sam, but you know, duty calls," Steph smiles.

"Tough job being Captain America, I gotta say," Sam grins back and opens his arms.

They enjoy a tight hug.

"Come back whenever, you hear? You should up on my doorstep as a fugitive once, so anything else is welcome. I'm sure it can't get any worse," Sam says. "I don't care what the reason is, you're always welcome."

"Same goes for us," Steph says. "We have plenty of space to fill in the tower."

The hug ends and the two of them just regard each other fondly for a second. Sam breaks it and looks at Bucky.

"You too big guy," Sam laughs, holding out his arms and signaling for Bucky to come closer. "Don't think you could leave without at hug. You're welcome whenever too. Anyone who can destroy six of my pans trying to make toast deserves to be hailed as hero."

Bucky smiles sheepishly and hugs Sam. Their hug is much briefer and not as tight.

"Tell those yahoos in New York I said hi," Sam says. "And remember July 4th, Steph. You promised!"

Steph smiles mysteriously.

"I guess I did, but we'll see if the others catch on though," Steph says. "I am living with two super spies and a tower with a personality. I think Jarvis likes me enough to keep a secret from Tony."

Bucky rolls his eyes.

"They walls sure aren't as thin as they are here," Bucky smirks.

Sam grimaces but the smile is back on his face almost immediately.

"You guys have a safe trip back, let me know when you're back in New York," Sam says.

Sam nods.

"Hey, Buck, you wanna drive?" Steph asks.

Bucky breaks into a smile as Steph tosses him the keys and jogs out to the car. Steph looks at Sam one last time.

"Thanks for being like the coolest dude on the planet, Sam," Steph says. "I'm going to miss you and lapping you three or four times on my morning run."

"Yeah, yeah," Sam grumbles, but he's smiling. "I'm going to miss you too. You better get going or your boy's going to get jealous."

Steph laughs and punches Sam lightly in the shoulder before turning to catch up to Bucky. He's not quite at the car and looking off into the distance, keys dangling in his right arm. Steph can't see anything in particular that he's looking at.

He turns to looks at her quickly as her sneakers crunch against the pavement and loose gravel. Bucky smiles at her. It's soft and warm. He holds out his metal arm and waits patiently for her to take it. Steph pauses for a moment to mentally memorize the scene. She wants to get Bucky's expression just right so she can immortalize it on paper later.

It reminds Steph of the first time they met, all those years ago in the schoolyard in Brooklyn. Suddenly she's just a child and Bucky, a year older, is standing over her with a concerned look on his face, hand out as Steph stubbornly refuses to be refused and treated like a delicate flower.

"Stephanie," Bucky calls. "You getting lost in there?"

Steph snaps out at it and smiles. She crosses the distance and firmly grabs his hand.

"Just rememberin'," she murmurs.

"Me too," Bucky replies softly and grins.

Bucky leans over and presses a kiss to Steph's ear.

"Let's go home," he murmurs.

"Sounds like a plan, m'fhíorghrá," she answers.