Chapter 2

A week had passed since the ball; the thought of possible retirement never far from Mr Carson's mind. He had not mentioned the idea to anyone at all. He couldn't. If he uttered the words it would make it real and he wasn't ready for that yet. Lord Gillingham had been staying for the last few days but now it was time for him to return to London, and so Mr Carson was organising the footman whilst they stored the Lord's luggage in the car. There was one last suitcase to go and Mr Carson, very aware of all of the work he still had to complete that day, decided to carry it himself rather than wait for the footmen or Mr Barrow, to return.

He heaved the large suitcase onto his shoulder and began to make his way to the car. He had not anticipated how heavy it was and his knees were buckling under the weight as he reached the outside yard.

"Mr Carson! What on earth are you doing?" Mrs Hughes cried, as she saw him carrying the huge suitcase.

"I am fishing for salmon Mrs Hughes! What does it look like I am doing?" he said tetchily.

"There is no need for sarcasm …" she said, rolling her eyes.

"There'll be no need for anything if I don't get this blasted case to the car ..." he began but was cut off by the increasingly irked Housekeeper in front of him.

"Don't be such a fool … put that case down at once and let Mr Barrow or one of the footmen carry it," she ordered.

However, the implication that Mr Carson should let a younger and fitter man carry it, only served to make him more stubborn.

"I am perfectly capable of carrying this case thank you very much … please do stand aside and let me be on my way," he said sternly. The case was extraordinarily heavy and this delay was not helping.

"Mr Carson put it down … you are going to do yourself an injury!" Mrs Hughes shouted, now completely losing her patience.

"I will not put it down!" he barked back.

"Oh for goodness sake, put it down!" she shrieked, as she reached up to try and pull the suitcase off his shoulder,

"What on earth are you doing?! Mrs Hughes, stop it right now …" Mr Carson said, as he gripped the case even more tightly.

"I will not stop …. not unless you put it down …" she said, still pulling at the handle on the side of the case. The case had started to slide off his shoulder.

"Mrs Hughes … what has gotten into you … the case is going to fall and you may get injured … let go at once!" he shouted.

At that moment, the suitcase came tumbling off his shoulder, thankfully missing Mrs Hughes by a few inches and hitting the ground with a great thud. Both the Butler and Housekeeper, worn out by their spat, breathed heavily as they stood either side of the case.

"Are you quite happy now?" Mr Carson asked.

"No I am not … not at all … what has gotten into you? It is not your job to carry suitcases … you should not be lifting such heavy luggage …" she gasped.

"Oh I see … and why not? Why is it ok for Mr Barrow or one of the footmen to carry this case and not me?" he asked, knowing the answer.

"Well … because … because …" she stuttered.

"Yes?" he pushed further.

"… because it's their job to do the carrying … you are their senior and should not have to do any such thing …" she said, pleased with herself that she had avoided mentioning his age. She had noticed that he had been particularly prickly about his advancing years recently.

"That is not the reason and you know it! You think I am too old … too old to be carrying a suitcase … you think I should leave such heavy lifting to the younger men … admit it …" he said, accusingly.

" … well yes … if I must … I do admit it … but there is no shame in that at all Mr Carson … why shouldn't the younger men do the heavier chores … when you were their age I am sure you would have done the same for your seniors … it is nothing to be annoyed or ashamed about … none of us are as young as we once were…." she reasoned.

"… well you still do the hard tasks when you have to … only yesterday I found you changing the bed linen in the Blue Room … are you telling me that is your job?" he asked.

"No … it isn't … but the maids were all busy and so I decided to do it myself …" she replied. She was staggered by his reaction. She had obviously hit a nerve.

"Ahh … so you are not too old to do chores but I am?" he countered.

"… changing a few sheets is hardly as arduous as lifting a suitcase that weighs about fifty tons!" she shouted back.

Charles's shook his head at this exaggeration.

" …do not try to get out of this Mrs Hughes … you think I am old … you think I should be resting … you think I am a crumbly old man and that I am not up to being Butler any more …" he said, pain lacing his voice.

Mrs Hughes looked at him horrified, she thought no such thing.

"Mr Carson … that is not true at all … you are the finest Butler this House has ever seen, or is ever likely to see for that matter, I just think it wouldn't hurt if you took things a little easier that's all … I am not questioning your ability … not for a second …" she said reassuringly.

Mr Carson didn't respond. He just stared at his feet. Mrs Hughes felt terrible; she could see how miserable he looked. She knew how proud he was and she had never meant to make him feel old or weak or inferior in any way. She just did not want him to end up in an early grave through sheer stubbornness or pride. She cared for him too much to stand by and let that happen.

"Mr Carson I apologise … I never meant to hurt you … quite the reverse … I could not bear it if anything should happen to you …" Mrs Hughes said, her voice a little shaky.

Mr Carson knew it was his insecurities on show here; he knew he was being overly sensitive because he was feeling old, he was feeling weak. He needed to say something.

"I know that Mrs Hughes … I am sorry … just ignore me … let's leave this suitcase for one of the boys and go inside …" he said. He looked up into her eyes and gave a weary smile.

She smiled in return and for a few seconds they stood in the outside yard gazing at each other. Neither made a move to go inside. Mrs Hughes eventually broke the silence,

"I am sorry if it feels like I nag you Mr Carson. I know you hate it when I fuss ..." she said smiling.

"You have nothing to be sorry for Mrs Hughes ... truth be told ... if I ever leave Downton I will miss your fussing ... I will miss you putting me right ..." he said genuinely.

"You aren't thinking of leaving are you?" she said, half-joking, half-worried.

Mr Carson didn't reply. He just swallowed the emotions that were threatening to come to the surface and smiled. A feeling of complete fear overtook Mrs Hughes as she looked at her friend.

A/N: Thank you for the reviews so far. Please do keep reviewing- it helps me enormously and encourages me to keep writing x