As I run through glass in the street
Kerosene hearts carry the name that my father gave me
And take the face of the wolf

Adam Torres was trying his best to find the motivation to get out of bed and do something with his day. It was already two in the afternoon, and he had been lying in bed all day. The only thing Adam had accomplished was spilling cheese on Becky's favorite comforter and crying when the stain wouldn't wipe away. Overall, it had been a highly unproductive day for Adam thus far. Also, the bedroom now smelled like stinky cheesy and Adam not taking a shower. A lethal smell, but he really didn't care.

Meanwhile, Becky Baker-Torres was at her church choir practice. She had put on a happy face in front of everyone, but it was difficult to hide the sadness she was feeling deep inside. It was two o'clock, and she knew Adam was probably still lying in bed. Becky had spent her whole day being busy and trying to do anything and everything to keep her mind off of her cheating husband. Her day had been very productive, but she was feeling very depressed. Singing was supposed to make her soul feel free and happy, but it wasn't working out so well today.

Imogen Moreno wanted nothing more than to kiss Adam Torres anytime she wanted. However, she could wish on one million stars for one million days, but her wish was never going to come true. Imogen came second to Becky. She was okay with being second, but it would feel nice for Becky to know how much Adam did love Imogen. There was no getting around it. Yes, Adam did love his wife. No one would debate that precious little fact, but no one could deny the passion Adam had whenever he spoke to Imogen or made love to her. There was something deeper than met the eye between Adam Torres and Imogen Moreno.

Perhaps Adam said it best when he told Imogen, "You make me feel like more of a man than I even thought possible." He said it with so much passion, so much meaning, it seemed impossible to brush it off as just simple words. Adam had not even said it while he and Imogen were having sex, he had told her one night while they sat in his car. The moment had been one of the best they shared during the past year of whatever it was they were. A year. Adam had been seeing Imogen for a year, eight months longer than he been married to Becky Baker.

Imogen woke up this morning and decided she was going to see Adam again. She had been over at his house last night, but she had left after they had sex a few times. She realized he needed space because Becky had just left. Adam was on the edge of his sanity in some ways because he never thought Becky would actually leave. Adam had said so many similar things to Imogen, but she did not want to listen after awhile. She knew she was second to Becky, but being constantly reminded really sucked.

"You probably don't want to see me like this," Adam said as a way of greeting when he answered the door. He gave Imogen a weak smile and stepped aside to let her in. "I have been in bed all day long and I smell like crap."

Imogen wrinkled her nose at Adam and stepped inside. She was holding a plate of his favorite cupcakes she had made, but now it seemed like she was tying way too hard. He didn't mention the cupcakes or how Imogen wasn't wearing her glasses.

"I always want to see you, Adam Torres," Imogen replied and placed the cupcakes on the table near the door. She pretended the picture of Becky kissing Adam on the cheek wasn't staring her in the face.

Adam smiled and said, "I am going to take a quick shower and then we can hang out?''

Imogen heard what he really meant and nodded. She watched Adam rush back upstairs, the sound of the shower running a few minutes later. Imogen was fine with being Adam's way to forget his wife because it meant at least he was thinking about Imogen for the time being.

When Adam came back downstairs, he was freshly showered and looking a lot more positive. He slid his arms around Imogen's waist and began planting feather light kisses along her neck and collarbone. "I see you even brought my favorite cupcakes," he murmured, deepening the kisses and pulling Imogen close to him.

Imogen closed her eyes and leaned into Adam. For her, this was more than enough. She was fine with Adam using her like this. It meant he wasn't with Becky.

Becky clutched her steering wheel for along time and stared at the home she shared with Adam. She had rushed here after choir practice had ended to maybe talk to Adam and found Imogen's car parked in the driveway. She also saw Imogen walk inside the house with a tray of something. Becky's blood boiled to think about that harlot touching her husband, but it also broke her heart to think about Adam giving his love to someone else.

She had promised forever. Forever. Forever. It was not supposed to be over in less than five months. Marriage was a lifetime commitment, not just something to be taken lightly. Becky had done so much to make sure her marriage to Adam was going to work. She had gone to counseling with him, learned about what it was going to be like being married to trans person, and had looked at the other options about having a family.

Becky had let go a long time ago the fact Adam hadn't always had the "right" parts to be a man. To her, Adam had never been a girl. He was a man in her eyes, just had been born in the wrong body. But surgery had given Adam what he was always meant to have. Her view point on Adam had gotten better since her time at Degrassi and getting to know him. Becky Baker had fallen deeply in love with Adam Torres and learned to be more accepting of differences in people thanks to Adam. But it was another matter all together when he was cheating on her. She knew men could be slimeballs, but she had always hoped Adam would be better. She had been proven wrong, and it hurt down to bone. Her fairy tale prince turned out to be toad.

Adam slept on Becky's side of the bed, clutching her pillow and wishing she was here. The pillow smelled of vanilla and cherries, exactly the way his beloved always smelled.

He felt like he was running through streets covered in glass, trying to find Becky. It was the same dream he had since she had left almost a week previous. He ran through the streets calling her name, his feet covered in blood from the glass underfoot. Maybe it was a metaphor for what his life had become, shattered, with him trying to pick up all the pieces and get his wife to come back home where she was meant to be. The dream was more than that though. It was not Adam running through the streets looking for Becky, it was Gracie.

Gracie who hated long hair and dresses, who cried when her mother called her beautiful. Gracie was the one looking for Becky. It made no sense to Adam because Gracie had been gone for a very long time, officially made dead when Adam had his final surgery. Adam had burned himself as Gracie. It was not something he liked to remember, but this dream brought those memories to forefront of his mind.

While Gracie was running through those strange streets, searching for Becky, she came upon a lighter. It was shiny and new, very bright. Gracie picked it up and played with the flame, testing it with her finger. The familiar sensation of burning felt great and she began to run the flame over her body. The flames consumed Gracie and she became Adam once again. This was the most unsettling part of the dream, but it happened that way every night. Sometimes Gracie found some kerosene and set herself on fire, but it was always some type of flames turning him from Gracie to Adam. The burning carried away the name Gracie his father had named him and turned him back into who he was supposed to be, Adam.

When Adam was himself again in the dream, he felt strong. It was as thought he had the face of a wolf and could wander alone safely. He found Becky at the end of the dream, but she always looked right through him. The dream never made sense, but it always jolted Adam awake.

Tonight was no different. Adam woke up in a cold sweat, reaching out for his wife who wasn't there. He would not find her in the kitchen making late night tea or in the bathroom washing her face. Adam had driven Becky away with his lies and secrets, and he knew she was probably never going to come back home. So all he had was this side of the bed who smelled like her and an entire house with her ghost wandering around.