Thank you to everyone who had reviewed last time. It made me happy to see that I can still entertain the masses of 3 Well, not much to say other than 'Here's the next chapter' 3

Simple Equation, Difficult Result

Through their differences, and common grounds they found solace in each other's arms. They found the love and compassion that each had been craving for so long, and they found it with the most unexpected person. They worried not about what their friends might say, they didn't care about what other people might think. They fulfilled one another in every way, and after that night they lived happily ever after.

If only… Life were as simple as a fairytale.

It's been two months since that unmentionable night that Cloud and I er… shared. Needless to say, after it happened, neither one of us knew what the hell to do. It had been filled with awkward silences, and confusing feelings. Spikes offered me coffee which I declined, and I said I had to go home which he agreed to. He didn't walk me home and give me his declaration of undying love. I simply left, and went home, settled into bed, and had a sleepless night.

We didn't speak of it since then; it had been mutually, and silently agreed that we wouldn't speak of the night, and wouldn't tell the others. So whenever the whole gang settled into one of the houses for a get together, we acted as normally as we could. Cloud would pin over Aerith as normal, and I would act as adult-ish as I could to get Squall's attention. The only difference between before that night and after was that for me, I was mainly acting up the part, rather than actually being sincere about it.

And Squall still doesn't few me as anything other than a brat.

Damn Squally and his stubborn thick head.

I need to invest in a squish ball, or stress ball, or whatever the hell they were called.

That isn't the real concern though, we're getting off topic.

After the throes of passion, or rather, desperation, I felt oddly, empty. Like something's missing. For the longest time I couldn't put a finger on it, and then this morning I felt sick to my stomach. I thought maybe Aerith had actually given me food poisoning the night before, but then I had to remind myself that she didn't make mistakes when it came to cooking. I hadn't practically thrown up my entire stomach ever since the ride from Traverse Town to Radiant Garden on the Chain Smoker Extraordinaire's gummi ship. (He hadn't been happy then)

Despite the fact that some people may not be interested in the fact that I'm currently sick to my stomach, it has a very significant point. The Great Ninja Yuffie, while staring down at my own stomach lining floating in the mass pool of discolored water in the toilet, has been struck by her very first, astounding epiphany.

Now that I think more on it, it's silly of me, or rather stupid of me to have not realized it prior. It's so simple, that I could smack myself for being so stupid to not have been able to solve such a simple equation. It's as easy as pie, as easy as one plus one, as easy as stealing, as easy as… okay. You get the point. What is the equation you ask?

It's simple really, look at it for yourselves.

Vagina, plus penis, minus condom, equals…

"Oh my fucking GAWD!" I shouted while hunched over the toilet bowl.

"Yuffie, are you alright? Do you need help?" Aerith asked from behind the door, followed by a soft knock. Just in case I didn't hear her speak.

"Kill me!" I shouted, or rather I wailed before rolling off the toilet bowl and settled my back on the cold tile floor. That's when Aerith opened the door and walked over to me. She made a face before flushing the toilet, which I was grateful she did because the bathroom didn't exactly smell pleasant with vomit stinking it up.

"Maybe I should get you to a doctor Yuffie."

"No!" I drew out the word long and loud. "I have chocobos in me!"

Blink. "What?"

"I'm harvesting a ranch!"

"I don't think it's the right season."

"I've got mutant chocobo headed Dark Lordy things!"

"Yuffie… you're not making any sense. Are you sure you don't want me to take you to a doctor."

"I'm snuffed! I'm tainted! I'm completely and utterly fucked!" I don't know if she was surprised by my sudden use of language or the fact that I'm hanging off of her dress at this point.

"…Maybe you should see a doctor." She stressed once more.

"I'm knocked up!"

"….You mean…" Poor innocent Aerith, she never caught onto much slang, even if it was barely considered slang and practically common English.

"I'm pregnant! Gawd Aerith! Did you have to make me actually say it! Do you know what kind of stress that puts me through. Here I am, wallowing in self pity and puking my internal organs out into the toilet, and you have to go and play stupid on me. I thought you had the common decency to at least understand what I was spelling out."

It's long moments after my rant that what I said exactly, finally dawned on Aerith. Poor, poor innocent Aerith. She's so naïve, so slow, so… ugh. "But.. How?" She practically choked at the question.

I can't believe she actually asked that stupid question. It's a new kind of dumb even to me. "Well you see Aerith… when a man and a woman.." I started to explain, although I began to wonder if she actually meant how I had sex in terms of 'who would want to with me'. Which only would piss me off.

"I know that. I mean with who?" Yep, it was definitely more of a 'who would want to' type of question.

I pulled myself off of her leg, finding that it's no longer a safe haven for me, in fact it's a new type of evil. Manipulative leg, offering comfort only to insult me, damn that leg. "I don't know!" The words came out of my mouth long before I thought about them. Upon the look I received from her after I spoke them, I realized that she must have lost all hope and respect for me at that very instant. She most likely viewed me something much lower than what she might think of me if I had told her it was Cloud.

I started to cry at first, but they turned to wails. Long and hard, Aerith continued to stand there, not knowing how to help me or if she could for that matter. I felt low, I felt dirty, I felt utterly stupid. Worst part of it all though, it's all my damn fault. I'm scared, scared shitless. Not for the fact of actually getting in the state I am now, but what it could potentially do to all my friends. The worse part of it all is I have to tell Cloud. I had to, it can't be kept a secret from him. Aerith will tell him, tell him that I slept with someone and am now pregnant.

I may be scared shitless over how he may react when I tell him, but I don't want to find out what he'll do if someone other than me informs him. He'll end up taking his meat clever and cutting me in half and turn into the heartless bastard he had come off to be when he first arrived back at Hallow Bastion the first time. Sephiroth would be reborn from the darkness, and hell will start to freeze over.

Aerith cooed and rubbed my back, as if I were some damn hurt animal. I wanted to smack her. Maybe it's true what they say about pregnant women, they do become crazy. I always thought it was much later in the pregnancy though. I haven't ever thought this poorly of Aerith in a long time, and now I'm thinking about smacking her.

Oh Gawd… Squall.

What would he think?

Would he accept the fact?

Would he help?

Or maybe I never had a chance, and if I did… it's probably in the shitter now… mixed with my dinner from last night. What am I suppose to do now? Maybe Merlin can make some sort of magic potion that will turn back time and have me actually have a brain cell and tell myself 'Don't do it bone head!'.

Damn those damnable hormones and damn Blonde intoxicated idiots!

Short chapter! Sorry, but I needed to split it from the rest of the actual chapter or else I would end up killing myself. Lol. Anyways! This is more or less part one of the chapter, think of it that way 3. Part two should be up when I finish it. Duh. Lol. Anyways, hope you enjoyed reading. Despite the extraordinarily short chapter.