Title: He-Who-Must-Not-Be-James-ed

Chapter: 2

Author: xxpiratexx (ME)

Summary: IT'S MORNING?

Author's Note: Um…Read and Review? Larger Author's Note at the bottom, don't worry. I know you love listening to me rant. :D

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What the bloody—? IT'S MORNING?

Oh, Gods. Last night, I probably pretended to be asleep SO WELL that I ACTUALLY fell asleep.

Without doing the 30-inch Charms essay.

Oh, Gods.

Oh, dear Gods.

This'll be the first assignment I've missed in…a year! No, wait. I didn't bother trying that Arithmancy crap last week. This'll be the first assignment I've missed in…6 days!

Admittedly, that's not that bad.

So…I don't think I'll bother trying to do it this morning.

The hell with forgotten 30-inch Charms essays.

Now…off to breakfast! Delightful breakfast with pumpkin juice and eggs and orange slices and apple slices and grapes and English muffins and marmalade.

NO! MARMALADE! WHY, MIND, WHY?

I almost made it a whole five minutes without thinking about that. Then, YOU butt in.

Go die in a ditch, mind. Go die in a ditch.

You know what? My 'sudden impulses' can join you as well.

Ugh. So can my lips.

To the outside world (outside world anybody other than Lily and her mind), it may have looked like I snogged HWMNBJ at breakfast yesterday.

But, really, I didn't!

YOU of all people (or whatever minds are) should know.

YOU'RE the one that made me do it! You forced my eyes to look at the empty pot of marmalade. YOU forced my taste buds to shrivel up and die when I had finished my plate and started on the plain English muffin. YOU forced my eyes (really, what do you have against my eyes?) to notice that HWMNBJ (who was, unfortunately, sitting right next to me as it was the only empty place that I could sit) had some marmalade on his lips. And then YOU committed the most heinous crime of all.

YOU forced me to swallow my dignity and kiss HWMNBJ just so I could get at the marmalade.

It's all your fault.

I'll glare at you (if that's possible) all through breakfast today.

You know what's ironic?

The "marmalade" was really revolting, sweet, strawberry jam.

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A/N: Loved it? Hated it? I'll never know unless you REVIEW!

The next chapter might be in a different POV. Let me know if you think it should be LILY POV or SOMEBODY ELSE. Kindly specify the 'somebody else'. I'm frantically trying to memorize Longfellow's poem. The Paul Revere one. So…I'm sorry for the shortness of chapters. I'll try to get them longer somehow…they'll DEFINITELY be longer soon, though. As soon as I memorize.

I'm at a sleepover right now, so PLEASE excuse me for any typos, as I am trying to get this up while the other girls are having a rather dramatic pillow fight.

REVIEW!

A cookie for all of you reviewers,

Rose