We do not own RWBY
Red is the Color of Passion
Chapter 2: The Beast Has Awoken
"So how do you like your sausage, Blake?"
"I might not be able to fit it all in my mouth, Yang; it's pretty huge."
"Would all of you stop talking?! The last thing I want is to be reminded of that- that-!"
"Jaune's dick?!"
"Yes, thank you! That was so helpful!"
Time passed, as it tends to do, and RWBY and JNPR sat at their usual table for breakfast the next day. Jaune had barely gotten any sleep the previous night, embarrassed beyond belief after 'the incident.' He prayed that the rest of his team, along with Team RWBY, would be mature enough to let the humiliating occurrence drop, but instead...
"I honestly don't know how anyone could take all of it. I'd feel positively stuffed!"
Yeah... that. He turned to Pyrrha, hoping for some semblance of sanity at the table, but she was staring off into space, an undignified droplet of drool forming at the corner of her mouth. She occasionally muttered something about 'towels' and smiled and nodded every time Blake or Yang said something. It was honestly kind of worrying.
"Erm...Ren!" Jaune turned to the other direction, praying that his only male friend would give him some sort of advice. The pink-eyed ninja just stared back with a look that said, 'What can you do?' and shrugged. The blonde Huntsman-in-training whimpered and hung his head.
"You...you two…" Weiss began, finally managing to find her voice amidst the constant phallic imagery her two teammates were describing, "...you two are disgusting! I've been trying to forget that! Stop bringing it up!"
"You didn't seem to mind it in the heat of the moment, Weiss-cream. Why, if I recall correctly, you couldn't get enough of the view! Staring, with longing, passion-filled eyes!" Blake chuckled as Yang opened her eyes as far as they would go, staring off into the middle distance at something 'beautiful'.
"What?! I didn't!" Weiss sputtered, not nearly as certain as she might have been.
"Seriously guys, come on! Could you just drop it already?" Jaune whined. "It was your fault in the first place, Yang!"
The buxom blonde shrugged. "Eh, details, details. Besides, I didn't mind the view, myself." It was Jaune's turn to sputter as Yang through her head back and cackled, holding out a fist for Blake to bump, which she did.
Nora was looking at Pyrrha. "Maybe I shouldn't have told her..."
A squeaky voice of surprising clarity broke through the confusion, and Yang stopped her guffaws almost immediately. "Now, stop that. Yang, Blake, Weiss; for shame. Jaune is a friend, and we shouldn't make fun of him like that." Ruby stood at her place at the table, holding her hands out like some magnanimous adjudicator, staring at Jaune with a pleasant, but unmoving smile, and half-lidded eyes. "It was nothing more than a happy accident. Let's all just move on a let the issue go." Jaune sighed in relief, face almost dipping into his breakfast from the movement.
"What?! I wasn't teasing him, I was-"
"Let it go, Weiss."
Yang leaned over to the heiress, whispering conspiratorially in her ear, "Yeah, the memory is just something we'll have to cherish in our hearts... forever."
"Forever...?" Weiss' face filled with red like a tea-kettle, and if one looked closely, they might have seen steam coming from her ears.
Blake, on the other hand, was deep in thought. She hadn't missed Ruby's slip of the tongue. "Happy accident" indeed. Sure the view hadn't been bad, but Ruby was fifteen, acted like she was younger. More than that, it had sounded... genuine. She'd have to talk to her leader about this.
Jaune finished his breakfast quickly, not entirely trusting Yang and Blake to be well-behaved. As he stood from the table, he heard the same uncharacteristically calm voice from before, "Jaune?"
"Hey Ruby!" His fellow team leader skipped around her side of the table before walking next to him, her hood swishing around her school skirt with every step.
She walked with him, moving... kinda close. After he clear away the trash on his tray, and stacked it with the others, he turned to Ruby, smiling. "Thanks, Rubes. That was getting kinda much. I appreciate you stepping in."
"My pleasure Jaune." She didn't normally emphasize words like that, did she? "I was glad to. They shouldn't talk about my friend like that." She kept staring at him with those big eyes.
"Uh, right. Anyway, I really appreciate it." He started to turn away.
"Jaune?" Ruby grabbed his hand, skipping around to face him. He looked at her. "Why don't we do a team-leader-meeting this Friday night? It's been awhile since our last one, and I want to surprise our teams with something fun..." She'd stepped closer as she spoke, until she was almost standing on Jaune's shoes.
"Just... the two of us?" She walked a pair of fingers up his chest before resting her hand on the curve of his collar.
"I mean, yeah Ruby. That's why it's a team leader meeting. Just us." Jaune explained, drawing his lips into a thin line. Maybe it was just his sleep-deprived nerves, but Ruby seemed to be acting a bit...off?
"Great!" Her eyes almost flashed with excitement. "Friday night?" He nodded. "Wonderful." She pulled him into a hug, draping her arms over his neck. Taken aback by the sudden contact, Jaune could only fall into step with Ruby's actions, hugging her back. It wasn't an unpleasant gesture by any means, but Ruby was rarely so 'hands-on.' Seconds ticked by as they held each other, Jaune slowly coming to grips with just how awkward this would look if anyone they knew happened to be looking in on them. More time passed, and Ruby showed no signs of letting go, Jaune's brow furrowing. Then her hands began to move across his back, rubbing him and slowly travelling down his back until-
"Erm, Rubes? We kinda have class?" Jaune brought up, a little quicker and more nervous in tone than he'd have liked. Now he knew he was sleep deprived; there was no way that Ruby of all people would be trying to reach for his butt, would she?
"Oh, yeah, right!" As if nothing strange had happened, Ruby bounced backward off of Jaune, smiling widely with her tone still eerily calm. "I'm looking forward to Friday…"
"Y-yeah...same." Jaune answered back, rubbing his eyes to try and wake up, even just a little. That hug had lasted quite a while too, now that he thought about it. Maybe Ruby was cold? Yeah, the hall was always cold in the mornings. It had to be that.
Ruby beamed at Jaune was he walked away, shaking his head like a wet dog. In that same instant, Blake sidled up to her. "Ruby?"
"Yes, Blake?" Ruby still wasn't taking her eyes off of Jaune.
"Could I talk to you privately, for a bit?" Ruby nodded, but didn't actually move until Jaune had walked out of sight around a corner. She turned to Blake.
"Of course. Would the dorm be okay?" Blake nodded, and the two headed there.
"So," Ruby started as she marched into the room, Blake following close behind, "What's up, Blake?"
The cat Faunus slowly closed the door behind her, pausing for a few moments before speaking up. "Not much, just curious to know how much you know about what happened yesterday." Blake decided to leave her comment vague enough to seem like she wasn't sure what Ruby had seen. Still, 'happy accident?' Ruby saw everything, that was clear.
"Why Blake, what happened yesterday?" Ruby replied with a coy smile. This was weird, Ruby wasn't normally like this.
"Come on. You told us off about it 10 minutes ago. You know what I'm talking about. The 'happy accident' of last night?"
In an instant, Ruby was right in her face. "You leave him alone, alright!? What happened was-!"
"Ruby! I know, I know! I wasn't going to bother him about it anymore." Just as quickly as before, Ruby was calming, folding her arms and rocking back onto the heels of her feet.
"Good." That had been kinda terrifying. Who knew Ruby could get so scary?
Blake gave a faux sheepish look, trying to hide a grin as she then added in a voice barely above a whisper, "I'm guessing you'll probably be pretty upset that I took pictures as well?"
At that admission, Ruby's silver eyes widened like dinner plates and once more, she was in Blake's face, but this time her expression wasn't one of righteous anger, but of eagerness and need. "You have pictures? How many? Did you get everything!? Can I see them? Please, please pleaaaaase!?"
The catgirl adopted a smirk, a gleam in her amber eyes. "Oh, so you did see everything then?"
Ruby gave a very fake laugh and scratched the back of her head. "W-what, no! I-I mean, not a very good look...a glance, really. So...maybe you could...send them to my scroll?"
"Uh-huh." Blake replied sarcastically, nodding slowly with the smirk still plastered on her lips. This proved it. Ruby had seen, and more importantly: she was interested. She wanted Jaune in a very unprofessional way.
Blake strode over to the desk and pulled out a chair. "Ruby Rose. Have a seat." Her leader had an expression somewhere between nervous and excited. "Relax. It's a good thing."
Blake walked around Ruby, hands behind her back. "You are entering a period that every woman encounters in her life: a period of Lust! And yet, you have no one to guide you, to provide you with insight and experience in this strange world."
"But Yang has-"
"As such, I will be your guide, your mentor in this strange new world! You will be... my Pervert Apprentice!" Blake stopped, posing with one hand on hip, and a finger pointed to the ceiling.
"Uh... thank you, Blake?" Blake chuckled.
"There's no need to thank me. I consider it a privilege to pass on my experience and wisdom to the next generation."
"I'm two years younger than-"
"OKAY! WHAT DID I JUST HEAR?!" The door flew open, smoke rising from the steaming hinges. A thoroughly pissed off Yang entered the room, eyes red, hairing glowing, and Ember Celica fully deployed.
With a calmness the situation did not warrant, Ruby spoke up with, "Shouldn't you be in class, Yang?"
"Forget class! My partner is trying to corrupt my baby sister!"
"Nonononono, Yang! That wasn't what I was trying to deal at all!" Blake dove for her bed, searching underneath her pillow for something.
"Right! So the bit about 'Pervert Apprentice' was just you playing Bastilles and Beowulves, hunh? Maybe I should get Weiss, we can form a full party!"
"How do you know so much about B&B?!"
"Stop changing the subject!"
As the two argued, Blake slipped something into Ruby's hands, placing herself between the sisters so that Yang didn't see the exchange. Ruby held the book in her hands. It was weirdly colored. Mostly black, with fancy artistic stripes of red and purple across the cover. 'Ninjas, hunh...?'
Sip.
It was a good day. Taiyang woke to the sounds of birds chirping (and not to that incessant raven that seemed to wake him up with constant crowing at the asscrack of dawn), he wasn't out of coffee for once, and he managed not to burn his eggs! With a newspaper, his omelette, a croissant and the sound of the Scroll television tuned to the news, the morning was shaping up to be a good one.
Sip.
His hand gripped his favorite mug, a mug that Ruby had made for him when she had been in kindergarten. Sure, the handle was too big, the mug itself misshapen and she somehow managed to misspell the word 'Dad' on the writing of '#1 Dad' but he cherished it nonetheless. Not a day went by when he didn't drink from it. 'Hm. Let's see here...looks like the Mistral Falcons managed to advance in the Egg-tossing finals. Another Grimm invasion in the middle of the desert...Ooh, they're opening up an IHOP in Patch!' Taiyang continued to read the paper, sipping on his coffee, when suddenly, without warning, two things occurred. First, a shiver ran up his spine, like someone had stepped on his grave. The second, and more concerning thing was the handle of his mug suddenly snapping off, causing the coffee to spill onto his lap. The scruffy blond man barely registered the pain, his face growing pale.
"No...it...it's happening again!" He stood up so fast that it knocked the chair over, and he stared off into space, shaking like a leaf in the wind. "Ruby!"
S/N: So... that was a thing. Amazingly enough, Lefou and I actually managed to get out another chapter for you. Let me tell you, it's like pulling teeth with him. It doesn't help that our schedules are vastly different, so we're only able to work on stuff together an hour or two each day.
So, the comedy might have been better, might have been worse than Chapter 1. I honestly can't tell. But, I hope you enjoyed the jokes, the innuendos, and the foreshadowing.
The chapter was shorter than I normally like to write, at only ~2200 words, but I feel this is the kind of story where you'll want more frequent updates instead of bulky chapters.
L/N: Ta-da! A new chapter! A bit shorter than my usual work, but hey, this is a silly, bite sized idea. What will happen next? Will Taiyang save Ruby? Will Ruby even need saving? How will all of this backfire for Jaune? Why do Spooky and I enjoy tormenting the poor boy so much?
Don't ask me. I don't have answers.
(He only writes those questions to be sensationalist. And my only goal in life is getting Jaune laid, don't call my writing 'torment'.)
Omake: The Trap
Yang had been smelling it all day. It was a familiar smell, something that called to her, resonated in her very soul. Now that she actually had a free period, she could devote the proper amount of time to finding it.
Her nose crinkled in the air of the dorms. Sniff... Sniff...
It was definitely stronger here. She walked slowly through the corridor, sniffing deeply every few steps. Stronger...stronger...
She arrived at a familiar door. Wait, had someone seriously hidden it in her own dorm room? No...
She turned around, sniffing heartily. Here.
She pushed open the JNPR door, stepping in quietly. She could be pretty sneaky when she wanted to. She tip toed towards the bathroom, wincing as a floorboard squeaked.
It was harder to be quiet in the bathroom, but it didn't matter. The maple syrup smell was coming from here.
She inhaled deeply, and a broad smile extended across her face. "Home..."
There was a loud, bang, and she suddenly had a laundry basket over her head.
"Aha! Gotcha!"