Alex was so sure that Goren was camping up on Brady's land, that she stopped at her brothers and borrowed a sleeping bag for the trip, then picked up some food before getting on the road. She figured that Goren would have anything else they would need for an overnight visit.
She made it upstate in record time which was good because the closer she got the more anxious she became. She started to second guess her judgment. Would he really want to see me? What if he's mad? She decided that if he turned her away, she would at least say her peace before she left. She would make sure he knew she didn't harbor any anger toward him regarding Joe's investigation; that it was the best thing that could have happened to her.
Once she turned into the driveway, she saw Bobby's car and smiled to herself.
Bobby was on the dock when heard a car approaching and couldn't believe his eyes when he saw who it was. She got out of her car and watched him as he got closer to her. She was dressed in a long sleeved, deep red t-shirt, faded jeans, and hiking boots. He thought she looked adorable but he still wasn't too happy to see her. He really needed to get his head cleared and he was sure she was going to be upset with him.
"Eames…what are you doing here?" He seemed cautious and a little annoyed.
"I was in the neighborhood…thought I'd pop in." She was trying to change the mood.
He tried to remain cold. "You shouldn't have come up here." He started walking away from her.
She stood her ground and spoke very loudly. "But I did."
He stopped walking and slowly turned to look at her. He realized he didn't want her to leave after all. He didn't think he was happy she was there, but seeing her, and having her close by felt good.
He looked over toward the lake, then toward her again, and carefully considered her before he spoke. "You're…you're free to stay, but all I have is a small tent…and it gets pretty cold at night."
"Lucky for me, I brought a sleeping bag."
"You have to wash up in the lake."
That's when she realized she didn't have a bathing suit. She knew she couldn't hesitate, though, he was relenting to her and she didn't want him to think she was changing her mind. "I'm sure you'll be a gentleman and hide your eyes." She saw him turn red, she tried to make him relax with a joke. "Don't worry, Bobby, I'll hide my eyes, too."
He lowered his head and rubbed the back of his neck.
"Help me with these." She opened the trunk and took things out of the cooler. She handed him some of the food she brought.
He didn't say anything as he put her back pack on his back and took what he could, then led her to his campsite. She grabbed the rest of the food and her sleeping bag and then followed him.
They were walking for a while, "Why'd you set up so far from the driveway?"
He didn't answer her, he just kept walking.
--
"So…how'd you know where to find me?" He asked her once they were at his camp site.
She watched him for a minute. She thought he looked so handsome in his navy blue t-shirt, faded jeans, and hiking boots. She always knew she had a sexy partner, but seeing him dressed like that made her realize just how very sexy he really was.
"Eames?"
"Oh, sorry, woman's intuition, I guess." Her mind flashed back to being in his room; staring at his bed and his tangled sheets.
"Eames?"
"Uh, what? Sorry."
He looked strangely. He couldn't figure out what had her so preoccupied.
"I asked if you were hungry or thirsty."
"Oh, no. I'm fine for now. But, did you see what I brought for dinner?" She got up and started pulling items out of a bag. "Steak…salad…" then she moved to the grocery bag, "bread…and wine!"
He chuckled at her. She seemed so happy, and he couldn't figure out why. The way he saw it, she should be pissed as hell at him.
"Did you bring…" He got that far.
"Wait," she reached into a canvas bag, "plates, forks, knives, salad dressing…"
"Did you bring a cork screw?"
She smiled at him triumphantly as she reached back into the bag and pulled one out and held it up for him to see.
"Wine glasses?"
"Don't you have cups?"
"Uh, no…I only brought water bottles." He shook his head and smiled.
"Well then, we'll just have to share from the bottle."
Bobby tried not to let that idea intrigue him too much. He nodded than looked toward the water. "Do you, uh, want to take a walk?"
"I'd love to."
They walked along together in silence for quite a while. Eventually, they came upon a ledge overlooking the lake and they sat down. "It's beautiful up here."
He thought of how ironic it was, that such an ugly, evil man could own such a majestic, peaceful piece of property. "It is."
After a few minutes, Eames spoke again, "I know what brought you here, to his land."
He didn't want to talk about it so his words came out harshly, "Stop it, Eames."
She fought back, determined to get through to him, "No, I won't."
He closed his eyes briefly, trying to reign in his anger. He tightened his lips before he spoke, "What makes you think you know me so well?"
"Look at me." She demanded.
He shook his head and looked down.
"Bobby...you're not the only one around here that can get into people's heads."
"Don't, Eames."
"No...don't you do that. You're not gonna get rid of me that easily. If you really want me to leave you alone...just tell me and I'll go...but before I do, you're gonna here me out."
"Fine...go for it. But be careful, you're not gonna like what you find in here." He said as he pointed to his head.
She inched a little closer to him and crossed her legs 'Indian style'. He was leaning back on his hands with his legs straight out and his ankles crossed. "You're trying to figure out if you have anything of him inside of you." She paused for a minute to see his reaction. He just leaned all the way back and crossed his hands behind his head. His eyes were closed. She continued, "You're going over the conversations we had with him, you're replaying his confession to Annie Duquett's murder. You can hear his words over and over...he ripped down her pants, he tightened his hands around her neck, the baby slept on the counter the whole time...you're trying to see what remembering what he said does to you."
Bobby covered his face with his hands. She knew him too well, he didn't know if he liked that or not.
"Bobby, I know you don't have any of that in you."
He pulled himself up to rest on his elbows. "How can you be so sure when even I'm not."
"Because I know you."
"Don't you care who I might..." He couldn't finish the sentence.
"Bobby, I couldn't care less who your father is." She tried to be as gentle as she could but she still saw him flinch.
"How can you say that, Eames?"
She leaned over and touched his arm. "Easily. I've known you for what…seven years? You are, and you always have been, nothing but a kind and caring man. I trust you with my life every single day, and that will never change. He might end up being your father, but you are absolutely nothing like him…and you never will be."
He looked at her and got lost for a minute. The sun was bright on her hair, and her eyes were looking at him with such admiration and intensity; all he had to do was lean over a little bit and kiss her. For a second he thought he would, but then he remembered Joe and Copa and that fucking case, and it made his blood turn cold just thinking about it. I'll never deserve her.
She watched as his face worked through a series of emotions, but she couldn't really place what he was thinking. All she knew was for a second it seemed like he was thinking of kissing her, but then he put his head back down on the rock. After a minute, she watched him stand up then he reached for her hand. She gave him her hand and he easily guided her to a standing position.
He took a few steps then stopped and asked her, "Do you want to see a waterfall?"
"Sure!" She smiled warmly at him and he took her hand to lead her through the woods.
--
Later on that night, they were sitting by the campfire. They had cooked the steaks on Bobby's hibachi, and the salad and bread went perfectly with the meat. The wine was shared, sip for sip, and they would both give a little nervous laugh when their fingers would touch as they passed the bottle back and forth. But as the contents of the bottle became less and less, their nervousness slowly dissipated, and eventually their quick passes of the bottle turned into lingering hand-offs.
Bobby started to get worried about their sleeping arrangements. The tent was a two person size, but it was small. He wondered what she was planning on sleeping in, and what he would sleep in as well. He had a heavy sleeping bag, so he had been able to change into just his boxers and a t-shirt, but didn't think that it was very appropriate attire for that night.
He looked up and saw her staring at him.
"Everything okay, Eames?'
"What made take off, Bobby?"
He looked down.
"I mean, why did you leave so quickly, and without notice?"
He kept his head lowered. "I had to get away…I hurt you, Alex…badly…and I hated myself for it."
"I'll admit, I was hurt at first, but then once I had a chance to think about it, I knew what you were wanting us to do was the right thing."
"Still, Eames…I've been such an ass to you…Between my mother, through her illness and her dying…and the whole Mark Ford Brady mess, I was awful…Then to top it all off, I charged full steam ahead right through your husbands murder…without once stopping to make sure you were okay…I don't see how you can sit there and be civil to me."
"Have you ever known me to keep my mouth shut when I have something on my mind?"
"No."
"Right, so what makes you think I would come all the way up here if I was mad at you in any way, or holding a grudge."
He sat for a while and contemplated that. "I see your point. But still, Eames, I don't deserve your understanding, or your friendship. I still don't even have the balls to ask for your forgiveness because I'm afraid you're going to tell me to go to hell."
"Say it."
"Eames." He said impatiently.
"Just tell me you're sorry, Bobby."
He looked deep into her eyes. "I'm sorry, Alex. I'm so sorry…for everything."
She gave him a smile and patted his arm. "Apology accepted."
"It's not that easy."
"Why?!" Now it was her turn to be impatient.
"Because it…it just can't be."
"Face it, Bobby, what ever you've done in the past…it's in the past."
"But Joe, and –"
She touched his arm again, "Bobby! Listen to me…what you did, how you pushed to investigate his murder…it ended up being the best thing that could have happened to me. I walked away from that case knowing the truth! And for the first time since Joe was killed, I felt at peace. I still do. I feel like I can let go of that part of my life and finally look to the future."
She ran a finger across his jaw line to make sure she had his attention. "That's what I want to do, Bobby…I want to look to the future." She then rested her hand on his chest.
He took her hand in his. She thought he was going to hold it, or pull her toward him, but instead he placed her hand on the ground and got up.
"It's getting late and the winds picking up. A storm's moving in. We should get cleaned up and ready for bed."
Alex got up and began tossing the plates and utensils into a bag. She was frustrated with him and he knew it, but he wasn't going to acknowledge it. Not tonight. Tonight was too dangerous. He wanted her, and she had been giving off signals since she got there; signals she shouldn't be sending. Her signals were like red flares to him; crucial warnings of her interest that he knew he needed to heed.
He needed to get some space between them for a little while. He knew they would be in close quarters during the night; not exactly the most advantageous position to be in with the woman you desire most in your life, but you know you can never have and will never deserve.
"Why don't you use that water to brush your teeth, then you can use the tent to change."
She didn't acknowledge what he said, but he saw her grab a bottle of water, put toothpaste on her toothbrush then storm off toward the water. Stubborn little thing. "Hey, uh, Eames…"
"What?" She growled at him.
"I was just going to suggest bringing a flashlight. You know, just in case you hear something in the woods."
"God help any creature that crosses my path right now." With that she turned on her heals and headed toward the water.
He couldn't help but smile as he watched her disappear into the night.
He finished with the dinner and packed up the food and the garbage bags. He looked down toward the water, but couldn't see or hear her, so he got another water and used it to brush his teeth, then he took a quick walk and ducked behind a tree to relieve himself. When he came back, he took the 'bear bags' and walked in the other direction to set them out. Just as he was on his way back he felt rain.
He ran back to the campsite but he still didn't see Eames. He gingerly climbed into the tent as the sky opened up. Just then he heard her running toward him.
"Careful!" He shouted as he watched her practically dive into the tent, landing on the ground next to him.
"I'm fine, don't worry about me."
Apparently, her little time by the lake didn't change her mood. Bobby huffed out a sigh. Alex ignored him.
She sat there for a couple of minutes, trying to figure out what to do next. Bobby turned on a small battery powered lantern, then he pulled their sleeping bags into the middle of the cramped tent. His lips were pulled tightly together as his eyes shifted between their sleeping bags and their back packs.
Alex followed his eyes then realized what he was doing. "Trying to figure out how we're going to fit?"
"Hmmm." He glanced over to find her watching him. He quickly looked back at the puzzle before him.
It was quiet in the tent for a few minutes. Nothing but the sound of the rain beating against the roof. When he finally spoke, he was serious, "Eames… I see two problems. One, is where are we going to put our stuff once our bags are rolled out. The second is a little more…complicated."
She shifted position a little, waited for him to continue.
"The problem is your sleeping bag, it's not going to keep you warm tonight."
She scrunched up her face a little as if she didn't believe him. "I'll be fine, it was warm out today."
He nodded a little, "Yeah, today…but the nights have been very cold…about twenty-five to thirty degrees…and it will be a little colder tonight with this storm moving through."
She looked down at her sleeping bag, then at his. She could see hers was much thinner.
"Okay, so then I'll go find a motel somewhere."
He shook his head, "As you pointed out before, we're pretty far from the cars, and I can't risk getting wet if I'm sleeping out here…and I'm sure I will get wet when I walk you to your car."
"You don't have to walk me, I'll be -"
"Fine…yeah…I know you think you will be, but I'm not going to take that chance. I'll be worried all night, wondering whether you got to your car safely."
She nodded, as much as she hated to admit it, she knew he was right.
"So, then…what's your plan?"
He inhaled deeply then loudly let the air back out. "I'm, uh, gonna have to zip these two bags together...to share body heat" He carefully looked her way to see her reaction. She couldn't look at him. The thought of being that confined with him made her blush fervently.
After a minute she spoke, "Well…I guess we have to do what we have to do."
Bobby chose to not respond to her, instead he started working on the task at hand.
Alex grabbed her bag and pulled out some clothes to sleep in. She had pair of blue flannel pajama bottoms and light blue long sleeved tee. She sat there for a minute trying to figure out the best way to get changed, but realized that the only thing she could do was ask him to not look.
"Can you turn around for a second?"
He looked at her and the clothes on her lap then did as she asked…and he listened to the sounds of Eames getting undressed. He heard her pull her shirt over her head and unfasten her bra and his groin tightened. He tried to not listen but he couldn't get his mind to think of anything else because she was right there behind him. He was attempting to seem busy with the sleeping bags, but all he could do was fumble with the zippers. Then he heard her unzip her pants and then kick her legs a little trying to peel the jeans off of her. Oh, god, I'm not strong enough for this.
She let him know when she was done, then pulled a small pillow out of her pack and climbed into the sleeping bag. "I'll turn on my side so you can change."
"Uh, okay, thanks." He finished zipping the bags together, then quickly grabbed a pair of sweatpants out of his bag and changed into them. Then he changed his t-shirt. "I'm all set."
She rolled back over and watched him try to figure out where to put their packs. "Why don't you put them at my feet, there's certainly plenty of room in that corner."
He smiled a little, "Good thinking." He looked at her to see if she was laughing, but she wasn't, so he quickly wiped the smile off his face. Then he crawled over and got inside the sleeping bag with her.
They lay there in uncomfortable silence for a while. Alex finally broke the silence. "Bet you're happy I came up here, huh?"
He smiled and chuckled at her. When he looked over at her, she was softly lit by the lantern which was now on it's lowest setting. He saw she was lying flat on her back with her eyes closed, smiling a little at what she said. He watched for a few seconds before closed his own eyes then he answered her, "Wise-ass."
"That's a cop out, Bobby…are you happy to see me or what?"
When he opened his eyes again, she was staring at him, and his heart started pounding. You don't deserve her. She saw his eyes fill with desire, but then it disappeared just as quickly. "I'm always happy to see you, Eames."
Then she thought she heard a noise outside, "Have you seen any bears up here?"
"Seen them? No…but I've seen where they've clawed trees."
"Why do they do that?"
"To mark their territory."
"Well, that's reassuring."
He laughed a little. "That's why I hang a bear bag every night, just in case a bear, or any other animal decides to come snooping around."
"What's a bear bag?"
"Bear bags are bags of food and garbage. An animal will smell it and get interested in that before he gets interested in us."
"That sounds lovely." She tried to sound funny, but he knew she was worried. "Hey…can we keep this lantern on for a while?"
"Sure, but we'll be alright, Eames, don't worry."
She nodded, "I know you'll keep me safe." Right after she said that, she shivered.
He looked at her with concern. "Are you cold, Eames?"
She got embarrassed, "Just give me a minute, I'll be fine."
They were quiet again, both lost in their own thoughts. She heard his voice just as she was drifting off, "Eames?" She was still on her back, but she could tell from the sound of his voice he was on his side facing her.
She didn't open her eyes, "Yeah, Bobby?" Her voice was soft and sleepy.
"Well…you asked me if I was happy if you came up here…but are you happy that you did?"
She kept her eyes closed but gave him a tired smile, "Very happy."
He reached out to touch her hair but at the last second thought better of it and pulled his hand back. "Good night, Eames."
"Good night, Bobby." She barely got the words out as she drifted off to sleep.
--
Alex woke up a few hours later and was horrified to find herself spooning her partner. He felt so warm, and it felt so right, but she knew she had to move. Slowly she inched away from him and rolled onto her other side.
Bobby was awake through the whole thing. Earlier, he hadn't been able to fall asleep, so he was on his back and fully alert when he felt her roll onto her side then run her hand over his stomach and cuddle up next to him. He couldn't move as a shock of desire warmed his entire body. Her forehead was up against his bicep and her leg was draped over his own. When she moved he felt her breasts against his forearm and he got an instant erection.
He decided enough was enough, he had to try and get away from her so he carefully rolled onto his side so his back would be to her. He took a few deep breaths to try and calm himself down, but before he knew it she was right behind him. He closed his eyes and bit his lip as her arm slid over his hip and tightened on his stomach.
He realized it was useless to move again. She was behind him, he was in the safest position possible. He just lay there and hoped she would roll the other way.
After a while he heard her breathing change so he knew she woke up. He heard a small gasp, then felt her slowly inch away and roll over. She was finally gone. He felt relieved, but he also missed her body against his. After quite a while, he drifted off to sleep.
--
Later on, he woke up and found himself practically on top of Alex. She was on her stomach, facing away from him. He was technically on his right side, but more than half of him was covering her. Worse yet, his left hand was moving up and down her back, under her shirt. Even though he became aware of his position and his hand's journey, he did nothing about either. Instead he closed his eyes and took in the sensation of feeling Alex. He knew how wrong it was, but he couldn't get himself to stop. He could feel the muscles in her back and the smoothness of her skin. He ran his hand back and forth several times before daring to slide down over her ass and down to the back of her thigh. His breathing was getting heavier and his erection came back like gangbusters.
That's when he noticed his pants were off. What the hell? He never sleeps with pants on so he realized he must have pushed them down in his sleep. All he had on was a t-shirt and boxers. He ended up ignoring his bare legs and refocused on his partner.
He continued to caress her legs and her back while his face was buried in her neck, breathing her in. It was killing him to touch her, to want her so desperately. He knew he was doing nothing but torturing himself because he knew he could never have her.
Little did he know, Alex was awake, and in her own version of hell. She not only felt his hand on her back, and his breath in her hair, but she also felt him. He was right there, even with his boxers on, she could feel him resting on her thigh.
Then she felt him pull the neck of her shirt down a tiny bit and kiss her shoulder. She melted.
She still felt his breath on her neck and shoulders and when he kissed her again, this time also using his tongue to taste her skin, she responded in a raspy voice, "oh god, Bobby…"
"Alex?" He was shocked.
She turned her head toward him and he froze. "Oh god, I am so sorry, Alex!" He started to back away from her.
"But I don't want you to stop!" She was craning her neck, trying to look at him.
"Alex, this isn't right, you're too good for me."
The second he said that she rolled over. Their faces were inches apart. The hand that was running up and down her back and legs was now on a collision course with her breasts.
"Keep touching me, Bobby."
He looked in her eyes for a long time as he tried to figure out what to do. She responded by quickly removing her shirt. "Keep touching me." The desire in her voice was not lost on him.
He pushed the sleeping bag down a little bit to admiring her naked body. Then he moved his hand down under the waist band of her pants and panties and into her center. He found her warm and wet and he left his hand there to explore her. "You're so beautiful, Eames."
"Then kiss me."
He leaned down and kissed her deeply. Alex wrapped her arms around his neck and shoulders, pulling him on top of her. He brought both hands up and ran them through her hair as their tongues touched and tasted.
"Bobby, I want to you…"
"But, this isn't right."
"Why in the world isn't it?" She was leaving small kisses on his neck as she used her feet to push the rest of her clothes off.
"It's just that you…"
"Don't you dare say you don't deserve me again…that's bullshit. You've gotta just knock me off that pedestal you have me on because I'm a lot more flawed than you think I am."
"I doubt that, Eames."
She rolled her eyes at him. "Do you care about me?" Her patience was growing thin.
"Of course I do."
"And I care about you, too." She became very serious and looked him in his eyes. "I love you, Bobby. That's what I've been trying to tell you."
"But…"
"No buts about it…you're stuck with me and you're not gonna change my mind. Now please…please." She was breathless as she slipped a hand into the sleeping bag and tugged down his boxers a little. Then she used her foot to push them down the rest of the way.
He went to kiss her again but stopped short and looked at her frantically. "I don't have a condom."
"I'm on the pill."
His mouth dropped open. "Oh god, Eames."
He looked at her for a moment, and she got fed up. She tried to push him onto his back. "I'll climb on top of you if I have to, Bobby."
He smiled at her. "No, no…let me, please." He carefully climbed on top of her and finally slid inside. They moaned in unison.
"Jesus, Eames, you're so warm, and tight and…perfect."
"Bobby… as soon as we closed that case …as soon as I felt free… I knew who I wanted in my life."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Yeah…only you, Bobby…only you."
--
The End.