INT. - BECKY AND ALEXA'S APARTMENT (KITCHEN)
SASHA walks into the kitchen and opens the fridge; She takes out the orange juice, some fruit, and the milk before shutting the fridge again.
SASHA pours herself some cereal, a cup of juice, and sits at the kitchen table.
SASHA: (taking a bite of cereal and glancing at her phone) Giants lost last night. I hope Becky didn't start Eli in fantasy.
BECLY: (from her room) Son of a bitch!
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA enters the kitchen.
ALEXA: Hi.
SASHA: Mornin'.
ALEXA walks over to the coffee machine and begins brewing some coffee.
SASHA sets her phone down and takes another bite of her cereal.
SASHA: Why are you up so early?
ALEXA: I work the early shift today.
SASHA: What do you do?
The coffee machine dings.
ALEXA: I'm a bartender. (ALEXA pours a cup of coffee)
SASHA: I thought you said you had the early shift?
ALEXA: Yeah, I'm a kindergarten teacher too.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: That's a crazy combination.
ALEXA: (chuckles) It can be.
SASHA takes a sip of her orange juice.
SASHA: Do you ever get your student's parents in the bar?
ALEXA: Yeah, it's kinda funny: I have to tell kids not to yell and throw things at school, then have to tell their parents the same thing at the bar.
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA takes a sip of her coffee and sits down at the kitchen table.
ALEXA: Why are you up so early?
SASHA: (sighs) I gotta be at the station at seven.
ALEXA: Oh, are you a cop?
SASHA: (shakes her head) No, I work at the radio station.
ALEXA: That sucks.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA tilts her head and narrows her eyes at ALEXA.
SASHA: (annoyed) Excuse me?
ALEXA: Not the job part, the getting up early.
SASHA: Oh. (forces a laugh) Sure.
BECKY enters the kitchen. BECKY kisses SASHA on the cheek and walks towards the coffee machine.
ALEXA: (to BECKY) What do you do for work, Becky?
BECKY: I'm a personal trainer.
ALEXA: You must be really flexible with your schedule.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA gives ALEXA a disapproving look and shakes her head.
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA: I hope it's ok I made coffee.
BECKY: It's wonderful, actually. (she pours a cup of coffee) Sometimes I have to beg Sasha to make it.
SASHA: You know I love hearing you beg.
*Ooh and Laugh Track*
BECKY: Is there any creamer or sugar left?
ALEXA: No.
BECKY: Good. (leans next to SASHA, whispering) Cause I like it black.
*Ooh track*
ALEXA hears BECKY and spits out her coffee.
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA: (getting up and starts to leave the kitchen) I wish I didn't hear that.
*Laugh Track*
[OPENING CREDITS SEQUENCE]
WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY: Chris R. Jackson and Joseph Thomas
CREATED BY: ThatWrestlingFan
*15 second Denny's commercial*
*30 second super hero movie hype commercial*
*30 second Subway commercial*
*15 second Cover Girl commercial*
*30 second commercial about the new show "Baby, Help Me" premiering after this episode*
INT. - McMAHON MANUFACTURING IND. (OFFICE SPACE)
AJ is seated at his desk, talking on a phone.
AJ: Yes, ma'am, I can guarantee your fire shields will be at your business in six to eight days.
KEVIN stops typing on his computer and turns around to face AJ.
AJ: Because I told the truck driver, Mark Henry, that I'd whip his butt if he made me look like a fool.
KEVIN shakes his head at AJ.
AJ: Alright, you have a good day now. (hangs up phone, looks at KEVIN) What?
KEVIN: Heard you talkin' smack, boy.
AJ: What?
MARK walks up to AJ's desk.
MARK: Heard you talkin' smack, boy.
*Laugh Track*
AJ: (visibly nervous, stands up) What? Come on, man. I just say that to make the customer smile, you know that.
MARK: (chuckles) Yeah, that does make 'em laugh. (pats AJ on the arm and knocks him back into his seat, walks away)
KEVIN: (smirking) Ya really showed him who's boss.
*Laugh Track*
AJ: Whatever, man. (leans across desk, drops head into his hands)
KEVIN: Dude, I was kidding.
AJ: (shakes his head) It's not you; Charlotte's been on my case lately.
KEVIN: Why?
AJ: I have no idea. She keeps telling me I wouldn't care enough to understand.
KEVIN: I can take her off your hands for a little bit.
AJ gives KEVIN a confused look.
*Laugh Track*
AJ: I can kick your ass; You know that right?
*Laugh Track*
KEVIN: No you can't.
AJ: I have before.
KEVIN: Name one time.
AJ: New Year's Eve, three years ago.
INT. - AJ AND CHARLOTTE'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM)
"Three Years Ago" flashes across the screen.
KEVIN, visibly drunk, is leaning against the couch talking to CHARLOTTE.
KEVIN: (drunkingly) I can bench press like three hundred and fifty pounds.
*Laugh Track*
CHARLOTTE: (sarcastically) Wow, that's so cool.
AJ, also drunk, walks over to KEVIN and breaks a beer bottle over his head. KEVIN falls on the ground.
*Nervous Ooh and Laugh Track*
AJ: (drunkingly) Sorry, there was a spider.
*Laugh Track*
INT. - McMAHON MANUFACTURING IND. (OFFICE SPACE)
AJ nods his head and smirks at KEVIN.
KEVIN: (shocked) You hit me in the head with a beer bottle?
AJ: Yeah.
KEVIN: I don't remember that.
AJ: (chuckles and turns back towards his computer) Exactly.
*Laugh Track*
INT. - MKV RADIO STATION (BOOTH 64)
SASHA is seated in front of a microphone with a pair of headphones on.
SASHA: And that has been your morning wake up call; I'm Sasha Banks and all you Bosses stay Legit.
*Laugh and Cheer Track*
The red light above the door shuts off, signaling SASHA is no longer live.
SASHA: (groans) Thank, God.
SHANE, SASHA's boss, enters the booth.
SHANE: Hey, Sasha, great show; People are absolutely loving your solo work.
SASHA: (smiles) Thanks, Shane, I was thinking abo-
SHANE: (interrupting SASHA) I'm giving you a broadcast partner.
*Stereotypical "Trouble is brewing" music*
SASHA: (shocked) Say what now?
*Laugh Track*
SHANE: People love you by yourself, taking calls and shootin' the breeze. But the guys upstairs think you'd perform better with a partner.
SASHA: I have been solo for over a year; No one has complained once.
SHANE: It's out of my hands. And to be honest, I had to choose between talking to you or firing Braun. So I sent an intern in after Braun.
SASHA looks through the window into the next booth where BRAUN is talking to an intern.
SASHA: He seems to be taking it well.
BRAUN suddenly grabs the intern by the shoulders and slams him through his desk.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: Never mind.
SHANE: Anyway, she starts tomorrow morning with you. Her name's Carmella.
SASHA: (sighs) Ok, can't wait.
SHANE leaves the booth.
The intern starts to stand up. BRAUN suddenly runs back into the room.
BRAUN: (muffled) I'm not finished with you!
*Laugh Track*
INT. - DDP'S GYM (MAIN ROOM)
BECKY is with a client, helping them stretch out. ENZO, BECKY'S supervisor, walks over to BECKY.
ENZO: Becky, I need to talk to you in the office.
BECKY stops stretching out and nods her head.
ENZO: (to the client) Keep workin' hard; Build muscle, no more sawft.
*Laugh Track*
INT. - DDP'S GYM (ENZO'S OFFICE)
BECKY walks in and sits in a chair in front of ENZO's desk. ENZO sits behind his desk.
BECKY: What did you want to talk about?
ENZO: I think me and you should head out on the town this Saturday. I know the guy that owns Murphy's Bar.
BECKY: Enzo, I've told you a million times: I don't want to go out with you, I like girls.
ENZO: What a coincidence: So do I!
*Laugh Track*
BECKY: I have a girlfriend: Sasha. You've met her a thousand times.
ENZO: What's so special about her? What's she got that I don't?
BECKY: (under her breath) A personality.
ENZO: What?
BECKY: Nothin'.
*Laugh Track*
BECKY leaves the room.
ENZO: I'll change her mind, one day.
DDP enters the office.
DDP: The hell are you doing in my chair?
ENZO jumps out of the seat and hurries out of the office.
*Laugh Track*
*30 second Red Robin commercial*
*30 second action movie hype commercial*
*1 minute trailer of upcoming horror movie "Never Turn Your Back"*
INT. - JEFFERSON ELEMENTARY SCHOOL (KINDERGARTEN CLASSROOM)
ALEXA is sitting at her desk, texting on her phone. BECKY and SASHA walk into the classroom and look around.
BECKY: (points at ALEXA) I don't believe it.
SASHA: I know; She still has the ePhone S7.
*Laugh Track*
BECKY: No, she's really a teacher.
A little boy runs up to BECKY and SASHA.
LITTLE BOY: Are you guys mermaids?
BECKY: (smiles) Yes.
SASHA: No.
*Laugh Track*
BECKY bumps SASHA with her elbow.
The LITTLE BOY runs over to ALEXA.
LITTLE BOY: Miss Bliss, there's two mermaids here! They have orange and purple hair!
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA raises her eyebrows in confusion and glances over at SASHA and BECKY.
ALEXA: Oh, mermaids, sure Jeremy. Go play.
The LITTLE BOY runs off; ALEXA walks up to BECKY and SASHA.
ALEXA: What are you guys doing here?
BECKY: Had to see this first hand. How're you doin'?
ALEXA: I'm fine, just busy keeping these little monsters alive until their parents show up.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: If you hate it so much, why do you do it?
ALEXA: All the single dad's are cute as hell.
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA: (turns to class and points at a student) I gave Avery's dad extra credit, if you know what I mean.
SASHA and BECKY shake their heads in confusion.
ALEXA: We had sex.
BECKY and SASAH: Oh, ok.
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA: Anyway, I can't chat all day. (looks back at the class) Gotta so separate a glitter fight. (fake enthusiasm) Yay!
*Laugh Track*
BECKY: (to Sasha) Let's get home. (winks) Maybe give you some extra credit.
*Ooh and Laugh Track*
INT. - AJ'S CAR (FRONT SEAT)
AJ and KEVIN are stuck in a traffic jam. KEVIN is in the passenger seat, while AJ is driving.
KEVIN: How come Charlotte thinks I'm a dead beat?
AJ: Probably cause you constantly hit on her.
KEVIN: Besides that.
*Laugh Track*
AJ: (shrugs) Maybe it's cause you're still living with us. If you at least pretended to look for another place to live, maybe she'd ease up. She's been all crazy, you know that, talkin' about havin' babies and stuff like that.
KEVIN: Yeah, maybe.
The two stop talking for a few seconds.
KEVIN: Kids? You still hittin' that?
*Laugh Track*
AJ: Kevin's back to normal.
*Laugh Track*
INT. - BECKY AND ALEXA'S APARTMENT (LIVING ROOM)
BECKY and SASHA are sitting on the couch, making out.
*Ooh Track*
SASHA: Would you like more extra credit, Miss Lynch. (takes off shirt)
*Ooh Track*
BECKY: Never thought I'd hear myself say this, but, yes, I would love extra credit.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA leans in to kiss BECKY. SAMI walks through the front door.
SAMI: Hey, guys. (completely oblivious to the situation, sits on couch between SASHA and BECKY)
SASHA: Ok, class dismissed.
*Laugh Track*
BECKY: (annoyed) What do you need, Sami?
SAMI: Nothin', just in the neighborhood, saw you were home. (glances at SASHA, who is sitting in her bra) Hey, Sash?
SASHA: Yeah?
SAMI: You wanna put on a shirt?
SASHA rolls her eyes and puts her shirt back on.
*Laugh Track*
BECKY: No, wait. (groans in frustration) Boobies.
*Laugh Track*
SAMI: (to SASHA) I heard on the radio that you're getting a new co-host.
SASHA: (rolls her eyes) I guess. Her name's Carmella, but I don't think I need a co-host.
BECKY: Neither do I.
SASHA glances at SAMI. SAMI looks at SASHA, over to BECKY, and back to SASHA.
SAMI: What?
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: What do you think about me getting a new co-host?
SAMI: Oh, I don't listen to your show.
SASHA: Why?
SAMI: I listen to podcasts on my way to work.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: Thanks for trying anyway.
SAMI: No problem.
SASHA raises her hand, about to strike SAMI, but BECKY stops her.
*Laugh Track*
*2 minute preview of new show "Baby, Help Me"*
INT. - BECKY AND ALEXA'S APARTMENT (BECKY'S ROOM)
BECKY and SASHA are laying in bed together. SASHA is on her phone, while BECKY is on her laptop.
BECKY: Are you sleeping over tonight?
SASHA: (glances at her watch) It's getting pretty late, I might as well.
BECKY: You could just move in with me.
SASHA: We've only been dating for a year.
BECKY: (in a mocking tone) Only for a year.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: I just wanna take things slow.
BECKY: We had sex on our first date.
*Laugh Track*
SASHA: I promise, Beck, I'll think about it.
BECKY: Ok. I'm just saying it'll be easier for you.
SASHA: I know. I just need to think about it.
BECKY nods her head and closes her laptop before setting it on the bedside table.
SASHA: Hey, (starts to take off her shirt) you still want to earn that extra credit?
*Ooh Track*
BECKY's eyes go wide and she quickly nods her head.
*Laugh Track*
ALEXA: (from her room) Please, stop!
*Laugh Track*
[END CREDITS SEQUENCE]
WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY: Chris R. Jackson and Joseph Thomas
CREATED BY: ThatWrestlingFan