Chapter Two
Hogan walked through the small, snow covered stretch of the compound that separated Barracks 2 from the Kommandant's office. His army boots made a crunching sound in the freshly falling snow as he quickly strolled towards the small military-green colored building. He then quickly walked up the stairs past the guards and let himself in to the office.
"Hey, Hilda." Hogan said, sneaking up behind Klink's blond secretary who was occupied with the filing cabinets at the back of the room.
"Guten Tag, Colonel Hogan." Hilda said, smiling as she continued to file papers.
"Is the 'Iron Eagle' in?" Hogan asked as he kissed her neck.
"Ja, he is doing his paperwork."
"Great, thanks sweetheart." Hogan walked over towards the dark brown, wood door and, without knocking, opened it and let himself in.
"Hogan, go away, I'm busy." Klink said as he occupied himself behind his large wooden desk. The interior of the Kommandant's office was warmer than any other building in the Stalag, but Klink was still wearing his heavy overcoat and gloves.
"Colonel Klink, I just have one request." Hogan said as he continued to stride into the room.
"Oh, go ahead, ask. And please hurry it up; I have dozens of Christmas leave passes to fill out for my guards."
"Alright then, the men would like to have a camp Christmas tree."
"And exactly where would this Christmas tree be?"
"Oh, somewhere between Barracks 2 and your office. It will only be up for about a day or so, so it shouldn't be too much trouble."
"Outside? Why not put it in the rec hall?"
"Sir, to have a single Christmas tree that truly fills the needs of the entire camp, it will have to be about 20 feet tall. Naturally it wouldn't fit into the rec hall!"
"Absolutely not, Hogan!" Klink yelled.
"Come on, Kommandant! Where's your Christmas spirit?" Hogan said. He leaned forward and put his hands on the huge wooden desk.
"I don't have time for this Hogan, Di-i-i-ismissed!" Klink began to pretend to scribble feverishly onto a piece of paper.
"Alright," Hogan said, walking towards the door "But when good old Stalag 13 comes in last place in the Stalag Christmas Spirit contest and Colonel Schmidt from Stalag 10 gets the Christmas Kommandant of the Year award, don't come crying to me." Hogan gave a sloppy salute and opened the door.
"What Christmas Kommandant of the Year award? I was not aware of any competition?" Klink asked.
"You mean they forgot to tell you again? The Christmas Kommandant of the Year award has been going on since the beginning of the war! Most of my men heard about it even before they were captured. I thought for sure that they would remember to tell you this year. Oh, well, since you don't care about medals and prizes and such, my men will just have to content themselves with small, nondescript trees." Hogan opened the door wider and stepped outside.
"Hogan, wait." Klink implored just before Hogan closed the door. Hogan turned around and looked at him expectantly. "Maybe we can put up a camp Christmas tree."
"Great! You should send your men to work on it immediately. In the mean time, have our Red Cross packages arrived?" Hogan asked, sauntering back over to the desk.
"My men? Hogan, this is your idea! Your men must chop down the tree and decorate it! And no, your Red Cross packages have not arrived yet. Hogan, Dismissed!" Klink said. Ignoring Hogan's presence completely, he continued to pretend to work on his paperwork. Hogan quietly and deftly stole a cigar out of the case, gave Klink another salute, and exited the office.