Chapter Two
Lundy's Sneeze (Hell Ensues)
Wendland hated to admit it, but she liked the world conferences. She sat defiantly as far away from Germany as she could get, and ended up on a rounded corner and on a stool just like Lundy. But unlike Lundy, she did not have to move for she was in between two very relaxed countries known as Italy, who was to the right of her and wouldn't stop chatting about pasta and Germany, and Greece, who was legitimately sleeping through all of it.
"Do you only like to talk about Germany and pasta?" Wendland finally asked Italy, who really seemed to be going back-and-forth between being really happy or really frightened by Wendland. The small country shrugged and twirled his cowlick with his finger. He seemed to be going with the latter this time that she had snapped at him.
"I don't really care for much, and right now Mr. Germany is a very close friend of mine! Isn't he your Big Brother?"
Wendland was about to finally slam her battleaxe into the table (or perhaps even Italy's head) when she spotted a familiar puffin perched on an even more familiar blonde's shoulder. Wendland felt her face heat up as the overly timid, shy, and painfully awkward Lundy was trying to dip out on their chance of becoming actual countries once again.
She jumped up from her chair so quickly it fell back with a clatter and slammed her protesting sign against the table. The room went so silent for a split second that you could've heard a pin drop.
"LUNDY!"
The small girl froze at the door before turning around and smiling awkwardly, obviously trying to look anywhere but into someone's eyes. "Yes, Wendland?"
"Are you trying to skip out on becoming your own country again? Come on, we've finally made it to a world meeting and I was about to present our case!" Wendland was getting angry and her fingers twitched at her side for her axe. "We're never going to actually become countries if you keep leaving the moment we get our chance just because you're scared of attention!"
Lundy blushed before finally looking down at the ground. "I'm not feeling very well and Martin thought we should… ah, ah-"
Wendland froze before realizing what was about to happen. She saw Lundy's eyes glaze over, her face twitch, her runny nose scrunching up, her eyes started to close, her breaths becoming more shallow, and Wendland knew hell was about to come.
"Everybody hit the deck!" she screamed at the top of her lungs before hitting the floor. All but two dropped.
Germany and England stood up at the same time and began to yell at the micronations right before absolute hell ensued.
"Wendland, what in blazing hells is this all about?! Becoming your own country; that's absurd! You're barely bigger than a campsite!"
"Lundy, what the bloody hell do you think you're when you're sick like this? Going out there―where you'll only get sicker for sure? Bollocks Lundy, and you wonder why I keep telling you that you couldn't last a day being independent!"
"ACHOO!"
Germany and England fell back onto the floor.
The windows rattled.
The walls shook.
Then everything stopped.
Everything was silent once more.
"Well Lundy, you've certainly scared the hell out of them now. Now this is our chance to show them we mean business and that we deserve to be our own countries!" Wendland smirked at the quivering countries in the farthest corner of the room, especially at the quivering England sulking on the floor, muttering to himself incoherently.
Good. One controlling country out of the way… probably. He did seem very fraternal―if not even paternal―to Lundy. I'll have to show him that she can live independently without him hovering over her all the time. Not that he had been doing a good of that in the first place, Wendland thought to herself, making quick and tense eye contact with Germany before huffing and looking away. She then found herself looking at the short, slim Asian man who was looking at her and the sweat-dropping Lundy very curiously with his flat brown eyes. His brown-black hair fell short, almost like Lundy's but much more thin, choppy, and shorter. Wendland was trying to figure out what country he was based on his white naval outfit with the pretty gold accents when Lundy's unusually whiny and upsetted voice filled her eyes.
"But I didn't want to scare them! Oh Martin, stop shaking. I sneeze all the time at home," she moaned in aggravation, cuddling the melodramatic puffin to her chest. The bird had pretended to have gone stiff from fear and shock. Wendland was starting to regret not taking the chance to skin the bird for meat when she had first met Lundy. "And Wendland, why do think Big Brother is acting so scared of me after I sneezed? I sneeze all the time, he should know that about me by now…"
Wendland turned to her friend with a twirl of her heel and stomped her foot very commandingly. "Do you want to become an independent country or no?" she yelled angrily. Her firsts were balled up at her sides, and she had that scary look in her chocolate eyes that Lundy had once told her made her want to curl up in a ball. "Well, do you?!"
"Yes, yes, yes!" Lundy promised quickly, holding up her palms apologetically. "I do, I promise, but can we do it another day? Martin wants go home to play that new video game I bought at the store yesterday…." She trailed when she seemed to notice behind Wendland. Wendland turned to see a country she definitely remembered.
America.
Back when they were children and met by accident, all before Lundy's history became all too complicated for her to remember without getting a migraine, Wendland remembered how the small island micronation had referred to a small blond boy with cerulean blue eyes who was bigger and stronger than Lundy. He had always either protecting her from bullies or teasing her for her something silly, until one day he just disappeared. Wendland had figured out all she could for her friend, but when she finally did, she had lost her friend to a powerful nation known as England.
England had tried to keep her protected, but Wendland learned from letters she received from Lundy inside her German camp that she had gone through many traumatic incidents leaving many blanks in her memories except for Big Brother England sulking for many months and being very hurt, Wendland's face and her angry voice, Martin the puffin, lots of hot chocolate, how to make lemonade that Big Brother England liked, how to make cake that nobody ever seemed to like, and how to speak Portuguese. If Lundy had any memories of America, it was probably only from overhearing bits of England's conversations.
The man was looking over at Lundy with a curious look while doing a terrible job of comforting England, not that Wendland would think America would actually try something like that. Wendland had kept tabs on him specifically when she infiltrated Germany's office and read his military reports; she didn't ever want him to interfere her goal of making Lundy realize the importance of independence. Although looking back in hindsight she could see how he might've been quite the help; or quite the even bigger distraction.
"Lundy!" she snapped, turning back to the small girl and snapping her fingers in between Lundy's stormy eyes. Lundy squeaked as she jumped and fell back onto the door in shock.
"Aye!" she shrieked in fear, suddenly snapping up with her back straight and saluting Wendland like a proper soldier- if, of course, proper soldiers also quivered in fear before their captains with equally shaking puffins on their shoulders.
Wendland sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers. So that damn bird can be shocked stiff from fear, but also woken up by fear…. Amazing how those things ever survive more than a day out in the wilderness. "Damn, we're never going to make any progress," she growled to herself in frustration. When she looked back up and noticed Lundy was still stuck in the same position, still shaking hard as ever in fear, she frowned and waved her hand absently as the little micronation. "At ease, you sorry excuse for a soldier."
Lundy sighed in relief before slouching back on the door, her rainboots squeaking against the hardwood floors as she slid down. "Why don't you just give the presentation for me and I go home and make everyone a cake?"
"Ugh, because than no one would take you seriously and I'd have to come to these things by myself. Besides, even if I somehow did convince everyone to accept you as an independent country, they would all reject you as soon as you brought in that crap cake. Not even your Big Brother eats that, and everything he makes is practically crap."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT MY FOOD YOU DIRTY LITTLE WANKER?" England had suddenly shot up and out of his frightened daze and sped over to the two micronation, practically screaming in Wendland's ear. The other nations walked over as well, though all of them much more hesitant.
Lundy flinched at the yelling and curled up in a ball on the floor before looking up and standing up to hug her Big Brother. England looked down appalled at Lundy as she wrapped her arms around his torso tightly and buried her face into his chest.
"Big Brother, you're alive! I was afraid you'd joined your little fairy friends out of fear. You've never gotten scared of my sneezes before…" Wendland rolled her eyes before yanking Lundy off England by the small Brit's coat collar and holding her up at eye level.
"You're never going to be taken seriously if you keep chasing after your sorry excuse for a big brother and always trying to please him over anyone else! Show you've got some kind of a spine and give me ten reasons why you should be an independent country!"
Lundy hung limp and looked like she was trying to shrink back into her coat in shame. "Uh, I'll make everyone hot chocolate, and I can sell you guys lemonade, and you can come see-"
"Yo, did somebody say INDEPENDENCE?!" Wendland watched as America then shoved everyone out of the way and smiled brightly at Wendland and Lundy. "Dudes, is one of you trying to get away from bushy brows over there, because I can totally help you out with that. Just start boycotting everything he tries to make you buy and sign a bunch of papers!"
Wendland then looked in astonishment as Lundy then jumped down and smiled up at the bigger country. "Rea-"
"America, stop filling my little sister's head with nonsensical ideas and acting as though I'm not even here! And Germany, what in blazing hells is your little sister going on about―"
Wendland then pushed over to England and grabbed him by the collar to make them eye-to-eye. "Listen hear you stupid Brit, I ain't his little nothing and it's the Free Republic of Wendland to you! And you're "little sister" is actually…. well, she's just Lundy, but you will still refer to her more than your Little Sister! She is a natio-"
"EVERYBODY SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!"
All eyes turned to little Lundy, who was now standing at full height with her umbrella in one hand. She pulled on the handle to show that hidden inside was a sword, which she then yanked out. Everybody gasped as she held the blade up formally with a wicked grin. Her slightly scary smirk then turned into a dorky, lopsided, and childish smile quickly as she turned to the flabbergasted Wendland and held up her sword high in the air like a prize.
"Did I do it right Wendland? You said I'd get attention if I needed to like this, right!"