Disclaimer: I do not own any characters in this story except for Jordan, Jonathan, and Scylla.

Authors note: I might need some help brainstorming a bit so if you wanna help, just review saying "I'll help fo sho dog" and ill PM you(: Please review! 3

Chapter 1: Thought you were different:

He's so cute! Does he like me? No he couldn't possible like me… You're crazy of course! He's mad about you! I don't know what you're talking about. *Mentally sticks out tongue*

Im shaken from my thoughts by Seamus pulling the compartment door open for me. "Thank yeh Shay" I say politely, smiling brightly as he blushes and murmurs what sounds like a "my pleasure".

"So... Shay… Who's your favorite quidditch team?" I ask, shaking my head trying to stop the mental argument going on in my head. "Umm… I'd have to say the Kenmare Kestrels. What about you?" He replies, eyes gaining interest as quidditch comes up.

"I think that the Holyhead harpies…? Debating between them and the Chudley cannons right now. Can never seem to decide…" I say, tipping my head to the side in debation. "Mhmm… Good teams, but the kestrels are going to kick their arses at the next world cup" HE says with a wink.

I blush and turn my head away, taking out my poetry journal. I guess you could say it was a diary, but I mostly write in poetry… "What's that?" Shay asks, trying to peek over my shoulder as I finish my entry about him.

"Get ye head away from me diary" I say sharply, acting like I was mad at him. I guess I did a pretty good job because what came out of his mouth next was pretty priceless.

"Uhh I-i-Im s-sorry!" He stammers, I try to stifle my laugh, but fail.

I start laughing loud and he finally gets on the fact that I was acting mad. "Hey! That wasn't nice!" "I never said I was going to be pleasant company" I say, winking successfully for once. Shay sticks his tongue out at me when suddenly the air gets chilly cold.

Realizing what was going on, I curl up in a ball on the seat and start sobbing. "Jode! What's wrong?"

He assumes I can't speak considering my emotional state and crosses the room in one stride, hugging his body close to mine, arms wrapping around me.

When the dementors had gone, he tilts my face up and stares into my eyes. "Why do the dementors affect yeh so, my dear Jode?" A hint of a smile lights up my face and I whisper "They performed the kiss on me father"

Shock fills his beautiful green eyes and he sucks in a heavy breath. "Who was your father?" "I can't tell you…" I groan, knowing this moment would have come even if the dementors HADNT invaded the train.

Hurt ripples through his eyes so fast I almost miss it and he says "Why not?" His voice wavering a bit. "Because you won't understand, you'll treat me just like everyone does when they find out"

His next two words affect both of our lives forever. "Try me."

I take a deep breath a whisper as small as I can "Jonathan Mecosta…" "Excuse me what? Didn't quite catch that, love"

"My father was Jonathan Mecosta…" I say loudly, trying my best to not let my voice be a squeak, but not really succeeding. "WH-what?" Seamus recoils like a snake, jumping to the other side of the train like I had just turned into a snake. I try and reach out to him, "Don't come near me!" He shouts as I stretch out my hand.

I turn my face away so he doesn't see the tears fall, and take my trunk out of the rack. Walking out of the compartment, I mutter, sobbing slightly "I knew ye weren't any different, but I hoped ye were" Not caring if he heard me or not.

I checked the compartments all around, and finally found a half empty room at the back of the train. Sliding the door open, I ask "Is it possible if I sat here the rest of the train ride?" The red-headed boy nods and I slide my trunk into an empty space on the luggage rack. "Im Ron Weasley, what's your name?" The red-head, Ron, asks. "My name's Jordan, Jordan Mecosta"

"Are you Jonathan Mecosta's daughter?" The brunette chick sitting next to Ron asks. "Yeh… Why?" I ask, confused. "I was just wondering… Im really sorry about your family, where are you living?" She asks again.

"I live with my best friend Scylla, we grew up together, and when my father…. Ye know. Her family took me in as if I was there own. I guess now I am" I sigh sadly, thinking of Seamus again.

"What's wrong Jordan? Im Hermione by the way, Hermione granger" "Nice to meet you Hermione, uhm. Well it's kind of complicated really; I met this boy on the platform this morning. And he seemed really nice. Then the dementors came onto the train and I freaked out and started crying. He held me until they left, but when I told him why I was crying… H-he…" Tears start streaming down my face as I replay what he did in my mind…

"He recoiled as if I were my father myself. I tried to reach out to him but he told me not to come near him" I cry, sobs catching in my throat.

"Who is this boy you're talking about?" The dark-haired boy finally spoke up. "Se-Seamus Finnig-gan" I choke out. "My name's Harry, Harry Potter." I gave him a slight nod to tell him I acknowledged what he said, and suddenly remembered something. "SHIT!" I cry out, searching through my knap-sack. It wasn't there.

Oh dear lord what if my diary is still in the compartment with him! What if he reads it! I think desperately, trying to remember if I had stored it in my trunk. Ron, Hermione, and Harry all stared at me in shock, obviously not expecting the swear-word to come out of a first-year girl's mouth.

"I left my poetry journal in the compartment," I quickly explained, there shocked faces turning to looks of understanding and then panic in less than a second. Well, Hermione had a look of panic, obviously she knows what this means to me. The boys just looked confused, so I filled them in, "It has my deepest and darkest secrets in it!" Confusion also turns to panic and they get up to go to the other compartment.

"No!." I yell before they can leave, "Let him find and read it, if he reads it, he may understand what he did, and why it hurt so much. " "Well that's actually smart… What did you write in the diary, I mean uh journal that will make him see that?" Hermione asks, puzzled.

"Well… I kind of developed a crush on him on the train, so I wrote that down, and I wrote how I thought he would be different from other people who find out what my father is."

"Don't you mean WHO your father is?" Hermione asks, "No. I meant what I said. But I loved my father, or the man I thought I knew." I reply solemnly.

"That is also in my diary." I state, staring through the window as it nears dark. "Oh I forgot! I have a piece of parchment that can transport words to any other paper as long as you state the name. It's basically like floo powder, but for messages. I figure you can write another entry about how much he hurt you and he might feel bad if he's reading it? Or maybe a message directly to him?" Hermione exclaims, and my eyes brighten a little bit.

"That's great 'ermione! Thank ye so much! I 'ope this works," I say as she hands me the charmed parchment and a magic quill.

"Now say the name of your diary into the ink bottle then just start writing, when your done, whisper into the flask exactly these words, remarks removed, and the words will be put in your diary!" Hermione explains, motioning to the quill.

"Thank ye!" I say, and tell the ink bottle the name of my journal, Story of a young victim. I know it sounds like a weird name, but I started this diary after my dad had his soul sucked out through the kiss.

Then I start writing, I guess I should fill you in on what I wrote, it might help a bit. No duh stupid.

What I wrote: Story of a young victim. September 8th 1993

Today didn't go as good as I thought it would. On the platform I met this amazing boy, his name was Seamus Finnigan. He was Irish, like me, and had the most beautiful eyes… *Sigh* they were green with sliver flecks, just like mine, but the green in his… Just like fields of green swimming around in his eyes… He was really nice and funny, I thought it was cute because he blushed a lot (: Then he invited me to sit with him on the train, I couldn't believe what he had said, I mean… Im just plain… Just me, right? While we were on the train he gave me a nickname, and it made me feel so so special, I almost thought he might have liked me… Sorry Im not writing in harmony (Rhyme) right now… It's just, what happened on the train… We talked about quidditch, and I pulled out this journal, writing a small entry about him, then the dementors… Ohh the dementors *Shudders* I was so scared. I started sobbing and couldn't stop, but he came to me and hugged me, I instantly felt better, safe, as if nothing in the world could ever touch me again. But then he ruined everything. Or maybe I ruined it? I shouldn't have told him who my father was… We might have still been in the compartment right now if I hadn't… He asked me why I was so scared of the dementors, and I told him they performed the kiss on my father. He asked me who my father was, and I told him… This is where it all went bad… He backed away like I was my father himself, I could literally feel AND hear my heart shatter as if it was a vase thrown onto pavement. How could he do this? I tried to reach out to him. He told me not to come near him, at this point I was a shell of my former self, the dementors had ruined everything. I really thought that he was going to be different. I thought he would understand what I was going through and try to help me, not make it worse by making me feel like my father himself. But I guess I wasn't right… I guess he's just like every other person I tell. I actually liked him, a lot. Now I'll never get to know if he felt the same… Im SO STUPID! I doubt there's anything I can do now so… Yeah. Im really nervous for the sorting but at least ill have Hermione (Granger), Harry (Potter), and Ron (Weasley), to cheer me on… I wonder what will happen when everyone hears my last name… Who knows? But whatever's, what's done is done and I can't change any of it… We are pulling up to the train platform; guess I'd better stop writing now… Bye…

P.S. I hope that if you're reading this Shay, you realize how much you hurt me, leave the diary in the compartment and I'll get it after everyone has cleared.

I put the quill back in the ink and say "remarks removed," and gasp, the ink is gone! All my words are gone! Oh well. "Thankyou 'Ermione, ye don't know 'ow much this means to meh" I say to the young witch, putting as much gratefulness into my voice as I can.

"It's really no problem at all; Seamus didn't have the right to hurt you like that" She replies, and motions for me to follow her to the old compartment, where my diary is laying on the seat. I open it too the page where my new entry should be, and am surprised to see Shay's scrawled hand-writing on the page.

Seamus's POV

I open the diary she left on the seat, and read everything. Then, a new entry starts to appear , it says "Today didn't go as good as I thought it would. On the platform I met this amazing boy, his name was Seamus Finnigan. He was Irish, like me, and had the most beautiful eyes… *Sigh* they were green with sliver flecks, just like mine, but the green in his… Just like fields of green swimming around in his eyes… He was really nice and funny, I thought it was cute because he blushed a lot (: (A tear drips on the page) then he invited me to sit with him on the train, I couldn't believe what he had said, I mean… Im just plain… Just me, right? While we were on the train he gave me a nickname, and it made me feel so so special, I almost thought he might have liked me… Sorry Im not writing in harmony (Rhyme) right now… It's just, what happened on the train… We talked about quidditch, and I pulled out this journal, writing a small entry about him, then the dementors… Ohh the dementors *Shudders* I was so scared. I started sobbing and couldn't stop, but he came to me and hugged me, I instantly felt better, safe, as if nothing in the world could ever touch me again. But then he ruined everything. Or maybe I ruined it? I shouldn't have told him who my father was… We might have still been in the compartment right now if I hadn't… He asked me why I was so scared of the dementors, and I told him they performed the kiss on my father. He asked me who my father was, and I told him… This is where it all went bad… He backed away like I was my father himself, I could literally feel AND hear my heart shatter as if it was a vase thrown onto pavement. How could he do this? I tried to reach out to him (Several tears stain the paper, smudging the ink) He told me not to come near him, at this point I was a shell of my former self, the dementors had ruined everything. I really thought that he was going to be different. I thought he would understand what I was going through and try to help me, not make it worse by making me feel like my father himself. But I guess I wasn't right… I guess he's just like every other person I tell. I actually liked him, a lot. Now I'll never get to know if he felt the same… Im SO STUPID! I doubt there's anything I can do now so… Yeah. Im really nervous for the sorting but at least ill have Hermione (Granger), Harry (Potter), and Ron (Weasley), to cheer me on… I wonder what will happen when everyone hears my last name… Who knows? But whatever's, what's done is done and I can't change any of it… We are pulling up to the train platform; guess I'd better stop writing now… Bye…

P.S. I hope that if you're reading this Shay, you realize how much you hurt me, leave the diary in the compartment and I'll get it after everyone has cleared."

I feel awful! Did I really make her feel like that? I must apologize… But how? My gaze shifts to the book lying open on the seat next to me in the empty compartment. An idea starts in my head, reaching into my trunk, I grab a quill and ink and write one small sentence.

"You don't have to forgive me, I wouldn't expect you too. But I just want you to know, Im sorry."

(A/N) It took me forever to write this chapter so I really hope that you like it! Sorry if you don't like the way Seamus acts, I personally don't like it, but I think it helps the story… Soo…. Yeah. Would anybody recommend this story to other Seamus readers? Its not getting much publicity and I feel kinda down-hearted at that… Thankyou!

-Seamusismylover