Harry woke up on time for breakfast the next morning. He had lay awake thinking over the situation with Ron and he decided to apologize to him. Harry got out of bed and went over to Ron's bed; his curtains were still pulled so Harry thought he would still be asleep.
"Ron?" Harry asked. "Wake up Ron." He said waving his curtain around. Normally by now Ron would have grunted a reply. Harry pulled open Ron's curtains to reveal an empty bed; Ron had gone to breakfast without waking him. Harry threw on some clean clothes and marched off to the hall on his own.
He couldn't see Hermione in the common room either. He entered the Hall and spotted Ron and Hermione already eating breakfast. Harry felt so angry and wasn't going to go with the change of heart he felt earlier. He went down to where they sat and then sat a few people away from them.
Hermione noticed and nudged Ron, but he had already seen. Ron acted like he didn't know Harry was in the room though. Hermione tried to catch Harry's eye and wave at him. Harry knew he probably shouldn't be mad with her since Ron might have just said that he wanted to stay in bed and meet them later. Ron finished his breakfast extra fast and got up to leave, nudging at Hermione. Hermione went over to Harry and smiled at him.
"Are
you coming?" She asked looking at Ron to Harry. Harry shook his
head and stuffed in another mouthful of sausages in so he didn't
have to speak.
"Oh, ok see you later." Hermione said and then
she joined Ron and left the hall. Harry watched them walk away and
Ron gave Harry one last stare before leaving. Harry felt the rage
build inside him. But it wasn't just anger, he felt hurt too. How
did he get in this situation the first day back? He couldn't help
but wonder if he had overreacted about Ron and Draco. After all, Ron
did seem hurt that he had said their kisses were a mistake.
Thoughts whirred around his brain and before he knew it he was one of the last stragglers in the hall left before class. After realizing, Harry got up and started walking. He looked at the time; he didn't have long enough to go to the Gryffindor Common Room before class so he just went straight there. They had Herbology first, Harry was one of the first there, but of course Neville was the first student there. Harry sat at his usual desk and students started coming in.
Hermione and Ron finally arrived and Harry's heart leapt. Ron reluctantly took his seat next to Harry, although he had the expression that he was sitting next to something utterly disgusting. Harry looked at Ron but he continued to ignore him. Professor Sprout had already told the class what she wanted them to do before Harry had realized. As soon as students started to speak about the project Harry took his chance.
"Why didn't you wake me this morning?" He demanded. Ron looked slightly startled at the sudden question, but sighed and looked around the room.
"You said to leave you alone." He mumbled to the air. Harry huffed and turned to Ron.
"I didn't mean -" Harry began but Professor Sprout had started explaining something and Harry interrupted her.
"Potter!" she said and Harry came back from his thoughts. "Do you mind?" Professor Sprout said across the class.
"Sorry, Professor." Harry said. Professor Sprout resumed her explaining but she kept looking to Harry to make sure he was listening. Harry couldn't keep waiting.
"I didn't mean it," he said to Ron.
"Potter!" Professor Sprout shouted across the room. Harry flinched at her shouting his name. "One more time and I'll have you in detention." She said and continued her explaining. Harry didn't care; he had to say this.
"Ron."
"Harry, I…" Ron started.
"Weasley, Potter! Detention after class." Professor Sprout said to them. Harry figured he'd wait until then to talk to Ron. They spent the rest of the class being stared at the Professor Sprout so they had to be in silence.
- - - - - -
"I will expect you two to have written a 5 page essay on Devils Snare after this hour is over. I unfortunately cannot stay to make sure you do it, if it's not finished then you will have 2 hours detention tomorrow." And with that Professor Sprout left the two boys alone in the greenhouse.
Harry
looked at Ron who was playing with his quill absent minded. Harry
figured Ron wasn't going to start this awkward conversation so he
took a deep breath.
"Ron, when I said for you to leave me alone
I didn't really mean it." Harry explained. Ron just looked up
through the roof of the greenhouse to the cloudy sky. Harry sighed
and carried on, "And the other night… I don't really think that
it was a mistake."
"Why did you say it then?" Ron suddenly was staring into Harry. "Just thought you would use me and then toy with my emotions?"
"No,
Ron. Like I said I didn't think you would speak to me." Harry
found himself going red from anger but he tried to keep his voice
calm. Ron just laughed sarcastically and turned away from Harry.
Harry felt himself shake slightly, he really wanted to shout at Ron
and tell him how much he felt for him but he just couldn't find the
words. Harry gave up on this feeble attempt to apologize and
reluctantly started his essay.
Ron looked around to Harry and
noticed he was doing his essay. He thought about saying something to
Harry but then decided not to. Harry looked up to see Ron staring at
him, Ron changed his expression into another look of disgust and
wrenched a piece of parchment towards him and began to scribble down
some rubbish he knew was completely wrong.
- - - - - -
After the detention Harry and Ron left the classroom, they hadn't said another word to each other. They automatically headed towards the common room to see Hermione.
"She finally let you out then?" Hermione said as they entered the common room. "What did you have to do?"
"An essay on Devils Snare." Harry said quietly to her.
"Oh
that's easy!" Hermione said happily. She then looked at her
watch. "Oh I have to go now. See you two at dinner?" She called
as she walked out of the portrait. Harry turned to speak to Ron but
he was disappearing up the stairs to the dorm room. Harry considered
going after him but decided against it.
He's
over reacting; I've tried to apologize enough.
Harry
thought as he slumped into an empty chair by the fireplace. Harry
stewed in his thoughts and stared out of a window.
Ron
threw himself onto his bed. He half hoped that Harry would have
followed him up here and then he could actually say how he felt. Ron
put his head in his hands and suppressed an urge to cry. He decided
to go into the bathroom for some privacy. He locked the door and slid
down and sat on the floor against it.
Before he knew it tears were
flowing down his cheeks. He clenched his fists and pounded them into
the floor. The pain felt strangely good to him. He had a sudden
thought and he got to his feet and fumbled around on his shelve of
things. Then he found it; his shaver. He pulled the plastic apart and
took out the shining blade. He found himself staring at it for a
moment, wondering whether he was actually going to do it. He sat on
the floor again, back against the door and pulled up his sleeve and
stared at his flesh. He put the blade to his underarm and pushed into
his skin. He could see the skin split under the metal and the blood
began to run out. The release of the pain felt indescribable. So he
did it again, and again and again. The blood began to drip onto the
floor and he reached for some tissue and held it to his skin.
"Come on Ron, you've been ages!" Neville said from the other side of the door. The bangs on the door made Ron jump and he had got to his feet, still holding the tissue to his cuts. Ron tidied up after himself, pocketed the blade and pulled down his sleeve. He took a deep breath and readied himself to face other human beings. He opened the door and Neville rushed into the bathroom behind him. Ron slumped onto his bed taking in the sting of the newly made cuts.
Harry walked up to the dorm room and opened the door. Ron glared at him from his bed and Harry decided he still couldn't face Ron. He grabbed his coat and left the common room as fast as he could. Why he was avoiding Ron like this he couldn't work out, but what he did know is that he was still hurt that Ron had gone off with Draco. And that mark on his neck he had had to stare at all lesson didn't help his decision. Harry wandered out into the grounds and towards the lake. He often found himself staring into the depths of the water. He slumped onto the grass and stare off into the distance.
Ron needed to get away from people. The people in the dorm room were trying to talk to him and he really didn't feel like lying and acting happy. Ron left his bed and the common room and walked aimlessly about the halls. He came across some first years that fled away from him, probably because he had pushed them over before. And then he came face to face with the person who had caused all this. Draco Malfoy.
"Hello
again, Weasley." Draco said in his usual tone. Ron didn't say
anything; he just looked down at Draco with an expressionless face.
He noticed Draco checking out the hallway to see if there was anybody
about. Draco then pushed into Ron and bit at his neck again. Ron
didn't react, he just let him.
Draco opened a nearby classroom
door and pushed Ron into it. Ron just obeyed Draco and watched him
lock the classroom door. Draco turned to Ron and had an evil smirk
slapped across his pale face, his long white-blonde hair draping down
the sides of his face like usual. Draco pushed his body into Ron's
and kissed his lips. Draco backed Ron into the wall and pressed into
his body harder.
He then started to take Ron's robes off; Ron
suddenly remembered his arm and tried to stop Draco. Draco slapped
away Ron's hands that were holding his robes on and wrenched them
off, Ron was left standing there in his shirt, luckily enough it was
long sleeved. Draco bit onto Ron's neck again and then moved down
to his collarbones. Draco began to undo Ron's shirt buttons and
kiss the newly bare skin. Ron's thoughts soon drifted from his arm
and he began to think that this was Harry kissing down his
chest.
Ron's shirt was undone all the way before he knew it and
Draco was undoing his own trousers. Draco held onto Ron's shoulders
then forced him to kneel down, Ron knew what he wanted. Ron obeyed;
he didn't really know why he was letting Draco abuse him like this.
He guessed it was because it was easier then objecting.
Ron groped
Draco's growing erection and began to lick up and down it. Draco
pushed on Ron's head so that he would take in all of his length,
even if Ron wasn't ready for it. Ron suppressed a few gags and
carried on obeying Draco. Finally Draco reached his climax and it was
over, Ron straightened and started to back away from Draco but he
wouldn't let him.
Draco held onto Ron's arm, making Ron
flinch. Draco didn't notice though, no one would. Draco pulled Ron
towards him and kissed him again, biting nastily at his lips as he
did. Draco pulled Ron's shirt off and ventured around his bare
skin. Ron flinched again but this time Draco noticed; he pulled away
and stared at Ron's cut up arm.
For a moment the boys stood in
silence, Draco staring at Ron's arm and Ron staring down to the
floor. Ron wondered if Draco was going to do or say anything, they
seemed to stand there for hours. Eventually Draco lightly brushed his
fingers over the cuts on Ron's arm and looked at Ron. For the time
in his life, Ron could see emotion in Draco's face; he actually
looked concerned. Ron picked up his shirt and got dressed while Draco
was still staring at him. Ron was fully clothed and Draco still
hadn't said anything to him, so Ron decided to leave. He turned to
the door and began to open it when he heard Draco shout.
"Wait!"
Ron turned around and Draco was doing his trousers up. Ron just
stared at him, waiting for him to talk. Draco walked up to him and
put a hand onto his arm.
"I know how you feel." Draco said
softly. Ron didn't really know how to react. How could anyone
understand this? Ron nodded gingerly and then left Draco alone.
Ron's
thoughts went from Harry and that drunken night where he had actually
let his feelings take over to the recent encounter with Draco. He
couldn't work out if he was actually starting to feel something for
Draco, but he couldn't understand why he would. After all Draco did
force him into things he didn't want to do. Ron's arm still
twanged every now and then, bringing him back into reality. Ron went
back into the common room and went and sat with Hermione. Hermione
was busy doing her Ancient Runes homework to talk; Ron didn't feel
like holding a conversation anyway.
Ron had barely noticed Harry
appear from the dorm room. He looked up and Harry shot a quick glance
at him then carried on walking. Ron's heart sank; he just wanted
things to be back to normal. Not that normal was what he wanted, he
wanted to actually tell his best friend how much he loved him.
"Is it dinner time already?" Hermione suddenly said from inside her book she was reading. "Hungry?" She said with a smile to Ron. Ron nodded automatically even though he really didn't feel anything, let alone hunger. Hermione stacked her books into a pile and tapped them with her wand, they shrank and then she shoved them into her bag. "Where's Harry?" She asked looking around the common room.
"I don't know." Ron lied.
"Maybe he is meeting us there." Hermione said walking off to the portrait door. Ron didn't answer, if Harry was in the hall he obviously didn't want to sit with them.
They arrived at the hall and it was busy with chatting pupils. Ron and Hermione made their way to a gap in the Gryffindor table. Ron secretly scanned the table for Harry but he couldn't see him. After eating only a few mouthfuls of dinner Ron and Hermione got up and left the great hall.
"I'm going to get some fresh air." Ron said to Hermione, she nodded and made her way up the stairs. Ron needed to be alone; he went through the enormous doors and out into the darkened grounds.
