Round 1! Thank you for giving me these. Two requests per chapter! Keep sending em in and I'll add em… WARNING: IS NOW M RATED! O.O

I stared at my inbox like a zombie waiting for the requests.

"Oh my fucking God! Hey guys, we got one!" I screech a high pitched girlie squeal as I kissed the laptop. I receive a very nasty electric shock as a result of it…

"It better not be dirty." Wendy piped up from the corner.

Kenny snarls at her from the other side of the room at the little slut.

(I really freaking hate her!)

"Okay, let's read it… It's from a guy called xOxStylexOx. Hmmmm, I wonder!" I stare at the letter happily.

Cartman: I dare you to kick Butters in the nuts, then lick the blood of em!

Kyle: I dare you to make out with Stan :3 (Style Supporter)

Kenny: I dare you to take your hood off

Wendy: Is it true you actually want to go out with Bebe (If you dont mind my asking?)

"Whoa… I freaking love this person!"

Cartman looks pissed… Again… "God fucking damn it! I am not licking his balls, especially when they have blood on them!

I see Bebe face palming next to me and muttering something rude, yet inaudible – Poor kid I feel sorry for her…

"Come on fat ass! You got to do it, or I'll shove that water pipe up your ass sideways for Shadow!" The small Jewish boy huffed.

Cartman was just about to retort, when he finally resigned to the fact that he had to do it. I think the only thing he would actually take pleasure in, would be kicking Butters in his nut sack.

"Nghh… I don't feel… Ready…" The little blond boy whimpered. He was obviously frightened, but I don't think it was the ball kicking that scared him most.

Wendy and Bebe flung themselves away from the view of what was now taking place in my bright, lightened room.

"CHAAAAAAAAARGEEEEEE! Eat my fucking foot faggeh boy!" Cartman screamed with absolute delight, grinning at the fact he was going to kick the biggest, pussy 4th grader in the school.

Butters howled in pain as blood started dripping from his pants and on to the floor. (He's sooo gonna mop this up, when this is over… If it will ever end…)

Cartman quickly whipped down Butters' pants and sucked off his balls, while I listened to the tub of lard's gargles and gulps.

"Okay… Dare number 1 is over for Cartman and –"

I got interrupted before I finished.

"-And never make me fucking do that again muff sucking, monkey's shit! Hella!" Cartman cursed at both me and the requester in thin air.

"Damn it, Cartman! Stop saying 'Hella'!" Stan shrieked like a maniac.

"Screw you guys, I'm going home." Cartman starts towards the door opens it to find no path way home. I smirk at him evilly.

I quickly point at Stan and Kyle to avoid any more confrontation between the boys. Time for make out time! Kyle blushes, whilst Stan looks totally eager to get started.

Within seconds, the boys have leapt on top of each other, Stan's tongue dominating Kyle's, Kyle then dragging Stan's trousers and taking his length in his hand. This was getting out of hand – So I decided to do something unorthodox – Like spray them, using my author powers to summon a water spray bottle.

"Guys! You can stop trying to screw each other now, I've seen enough!" I called out, staring at the young horny boys.

Both males blushed in response, hopped off each other and on to the floor. Now it was Kenny's dare. Kenny shook his head in response, mimicking the 'no no no' cat (If you don't know, watch it on youtube. It will have you in fits!).

I sigh in exasperation. Token shuffles closer to Bebe, smiling sweetly. Pip averts his eyes in shame away from Damien, who undoubtedly has been quiet and behaving himself.

"Kenny… Do you want me to tell our loyal readers why you won't take your hood off, or do you?" I whisper coarsely where his ears should be, but covered by his orange parka.

He points at me, so I carry on…

"Okay, years ago, Kenny got molested by his father..."

The young boy hangs his head in sadness.

"… And he was forced to wear a parka, but not because he is disgusting…"

I pause and gently enquire Kenny to take his hood off for the requester. He mumbles more inaudible speech at me, but obliges in fear.

Bebe and Wendy squeal with orgasmic fascination and I spot Stan and Kyle desperately trying to hide their bulging boners. Cartman is hiding under the table after I smirked evilly at him, as for Token, Pip, Clyde and Damien, well they're just huffing in jealously.

Kenny's face was unmarked, yet beautiful for all to see. His dirty blonde hair spiked in many directions and his blue eyes sparkled even more than mine did. Kenny was the sort of person that even Mr Garrison would ask out… Maybe…

"Right. Kenny has finally finished his dare after some kind persuasion and now on to Wendy's truth…"

"NOOOOOO! Okay, I do admit it; you are hotter than Stan, so yeah…" Wendy whimpers.

I pull a shocked kitty face and think about the pairing 'Webe'… Sweeet…

"Ooooh! Another one. This one is from Ninja-Werepire96… Ha my other self." I smiled at the dare.

Love it! Pwning Cartman was friggen awesome. I have high expectations for this, other me!

Also . . . I dare Cartman to last 5 chapters without calling Kyle a jew. If he fails then no KFC for him! :D

"What the fuck! I can't call Kyle a monkey fucking J-" Cartman pauses and grins. "Fine, I'll do it, but only cuz I only want that KFC desperately. She'd better throw in some cheesy poofs as well after this…"

Kyle beamed ecstatically at me and the thin air that Ninja-Werepire was watching from.

I wait cautiously on the inbox for more truths and dares while Wendy and Bebe come to terms with loving each other…

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