WARNINGS: Spoilers in this chapter for the ending of COLS. There are no warnings for the content of this chapter, unless you don't like pure unadulterated sadness. Much less fluff then the first chapter. Oops, sorry.

Enjoy!

Magnus paced his loft. His mind was split in a silent debate. The mental civil war was, as always, about Alec Lightwood.

One part of him, probably the more reasonable part, suggested that he talk things through with Alec and make him understand the real reason why they broke up.

The other part of him objected and wanted him to sit around feeling pitiful and guilty about the past.

The second part was winning out, mainly because it was less effort and Magnus hadn't eaten a decent meal in days. He was running on three cups of coffee and left over crab rangoons.

Alec was worth it, countered the first part. Of everyone on this planet, Alec was always worth it. Magnus couldn't argue with that. It was the same logic that always persuaded him to help the Shadowhunters on one of their suicide missions. He cursed his heart as he grabbed his phone off of the counter. He began to type in the number but his finger hesitated on the last digit. He struggled to figure out what he was going to say, before he realized that there wasn't anything he could say.

Alec had been avoiding him for weeks. Jace had come by to pick up Alec's belongings because he claimed to be too busy to get them himself. Magnus had seen him at the mall, of all places, shopping with Isabelle. At the first sight of Magnus, he stiffened, turned around and walked straight out the exit. Magnus had wanted to follow him but something held him in place. Go after him! His mind had screamed,but Magnus knew he shouldn't. Alec was going to great lengths to avoid him, so maybe he should do the same.

There was one thing Magnus realized the first few days after their break up. When they were together, Alec would always text him before he went to sleep. After their break up, Magnus would look towards his phone and see that one word, sent to him by force of habit. Alec's contact would light up Magnus's phone at eleven o'clock every night, the exact time Alec went to bed. Magnus never replied, but he was always grateful to receive the text. For a moment, just before his head hit the pillow, he could pretend that they were still together. It was a painfully wonderful thing to imagine, but it just brought him sadness every morning.

Magnus held his phone, standing in his loft at three in the afternoon, debating whether he should call him. It struck him that if he tried to talk to Alec he wouldn't be able to get the words out. He glanced down at Alec's number and made a split second decision. He brought up Alec's texts. A long strand of goodnight's stretching all the way back to the day of their break up, with no replies on Magnus's side. He felt somewhat guilty as he typed out a message.

Magnus Bane: Do u have a minute? 3 3 CATZ 3 3

Magnus cringed at the signature that he forgot was programmed into his phone and swiftly deleted it. A few seconds later his phone buzzed.

Alec Lightwood: Yeah... Why now?

That was a good question. Why now, instead of all those days he shut his phone off? Why now, instead of replying to his goodnight texts?

Magnus Bane: Because I finally know what needs to be said.

This was a lie and Magnus knew it.

Alec Lightwood: You have my attention.

Might as well just skip straight to the point.

Magnus Bane: I love you, you know that, right? You know I want to be with you more than I've wanted anything else in my life. But we can't be together.

Alec Lightwood: WHY NOT? I know I made a huge mistake and I apologized!

Magnus Bane: Its not just the thing with Camille! Its much more than that!

Alec Lightwood: Then what? What is it thats keeping us apart?

How does one explain the burden of immortality to an eighteen year-old?

Magnus Bane: We tried Alec, we gave it our best shot. But this... This is about my immortality staring us down whenever I try to love you. You are living proof that my immortality is a toxin that is fatal to relationships. I love you too much, Alexander, to burden you with that.

Alec Lightwood: Magnus... I don't care about that anymore. Every second with you is worth a lifetime.

Magnus Bane: I'm sorry Alec.

Alec Lightwood: You aren't allowed to decide what is too much for me! I am the only one who can decide what I go through and I am telling you that I love you.

Alec Lightwood: I'm still sorry for what I did.

Every text was harder to answer then the last.

Magnus Bane: You don't need to keep apologizing.

Alec Lightwood: You're right, Its your turn.

Magnus froze, his thumbs suspended above the keys.

Magnus Bane: What do you mean?

Alec Lightwood: You kept me in the dark. You STILL keep me in the dark. Ive told you everything about myself and you've told me nothing! I feel like I don't know you. That was part of the reason I went to Camille. She would tell me more about you then you ever told me! Every time I saw her, I became more and more convinced that you didn't love me enough to talk to me, but you loved her.

Tears pricked the back of Magnus's eyes.

Magnus Bane: How could you ever think I didn't love you? I let Camille in. I let her see my past and she used it against me! She knew about me and she unraveled me with it. After her, I realized that sharing myself with someone only puts them in danger.

Alec Lightwood: So, you thought I would use it against you? That I would try to break you? You don't trust me?

Magnus Bane: You know that isn't what I meant.

Alec Lightwood: No, I know what you meant. You wanted to protect me. But who protects you, Magnus?

Magnus Bane: I don't understand.

Alec Lightwood: You are always worrying about everyone else and how you have to shelter them from everything. Hiding yourself away isn't going to make things better. Who protects you when you've driven everyone away from you?

Tears were falling freely now.

Magnus Bane: Its over Alec. Move on and let it go.

Alec Lightwood: No.

Magnus Bane: I don't need anyone to protect me. Do us both a favor and give up on me.

Alec Lightwood: Like everyone else has? No.

Magnus Bane: Goodbye Alec.

Alec didn't respond. Magnus stared down at his phone, both regretting what happened and thanking himself for doing what needed to be done.

Alec didn't text him at eleven that night. Nor the night after that. Magnus hated himself for ruining the one thing he had left.

Then, three nights later, when he was awakened from a light sleep by buzz coming from his bedside table. He rolled over and to look at the time. 3:47 AM.

The phone was giving off a bright fluorescent light that immediately lit up the room, making Magnus wince.

Alec Lightwood: Goodnight.

Magnus thought for a second before replying.

Magnus Bane: Sweet dreams, Alexander.

A few moments passed before Magnus's phone vibrated one last time.

Alec Lightwood: I will never give up on you.

That was enough to make Magnus smile for the first time in weeks.

A/N: So sad! I almost feel bad for writing so many sad things! Almost...

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