A/N: Before we get started I'd like to say something to Austadophilus. Wow, I'm flattered beyond belief that you'd want to do a fan-comic based off of my previous chapter and can't wait to see it!

Mating Rituals

Neither Lars nor Sadie knew what to think when Peridot entered the doughnut shop alone other then total fright. The Gem on the other hand had no idea why their stress levels where rising at an alarming rate, she only came in here to retrieve some of the tire-shaped snacks for Steven as well as try to clear her head about Pearl.

"Excuse me service units" she began "I require a box of a dozen of your finest 'doughnuts' at once!"

"Uh—o-okay" Lars answered sheepishly "Just please don't hurt us!"

As the two teens began to gather up some doughnuts for the former invader, Peridot decided to ask about the sudden change in emotions; Steven always told her that should interact with more people anyway.

"Is there something wrong with you to?" she inquired "I am detecting a massive increase in stress levels from both of you"

"I-it's nothing—uh, ma'am!" Sadie attempted to reason

"Do you require physical assurance?" the Gem questioned further before out stretching her arms "I can hug you if you'd like"

"Please don't touch me!" Lars yelped

Peridot pressed the matter further by scanning them both, which they did not appreciate in the least.

"What are you doing?!" the boy nearly exclaimed

"I'm scanning you, obviously" Peridot replied as if she was doing nothing wrong as she looked over her readings via her hand-screen "Ah, here's the problem: Your hormones are at there's peak, you require sexual intercourse at cure this"

"WHAT?!" Lars and Sadie shouted in shock

"You two should engage in a human mating ritual at once to stabilize your stress levels" the Home-World Gem explained "if you require stimulation, I can provide both videos and music to assist in this"

"We're not having—we're not—" Lars was at a loss for words

"Please just take the doughnuts and go!" Sadie said with embarrassment written all over her face as she shoved the box of doughnuts to her

With that, Peridot simply shrugged her shoulders and made her way out of the building, leaving the teens feeling uneasy and violated.

"Humans are so prudish when it comes to sex" she thought to herself, eating one of the doughnuts as she did "mmm…jelly-filled"