I make my way downstairs, making sure the stairs don't squeak so as to keep Watanuki asleep in our room. Something has changed between us, a small tear in our red string. Or that's what Yuuko had told me late last night after Watanuki had fallen asleep in my bed, his tear stained face, peaceful.
"You have to mend it if you want to keep him beside you," she had said as soon as I answered the phone.
"Mend what?" I asked, clueless. I reached over to move some of his hair out of his face.
"You must mend what you have torn." She answered, always vague. "Your red string of fate has been torn, slightly, but even the smallest of tears can break it. You two are fated to be together, like I told Watanuki the first time he began telling me stories about you. Of course," her voice softened," that was when he hadn't liked you that much." I looked down at his face again.
Flashes of his crying eyes, as he spit out a lie that almost broke me, went through my mind, along with all of the other times we had together. Nothing compares to them now.
"I never thought that he would fall in love with you though. Or for you to accept it. it was a path that I thought he would never be able to walk down," she suddenly yelled for more sake, leaving me to my own thoughts for a second.
"What do I have to do to fix it?"
Oh ho. Now that, I was expecting."
As now as I cook breakfast for both of us, I think of the things that Yuuko told me. I have to do the right things, show more affection to him than I did in the past.
"Domeki, I didn't mean to sleep in," and there he is, standing in the kitchen doorway, rubbing his brown eye. I try to smile, really I do, but I can't.
"It's fine. You looked peaceful, so I didn't want to wake you," I say as I walk over and envelop him in a hug. He's stiff at first, making my heart drop.
Did he not want this sort of affection? I almost pull away, when he leans into my chest, humming a little tune. I smile, No he was waiting for this, has been wanting it.
He looks up at me, with those mismatched eyes of his, and smiles, "Domeki, what do you have planned for today?" his voice seems happier today, much more so than yesterday.
"Nothing really, I was going to spend the day home, I guess," I shrug as he looks at the carefully made breakfast. "I didnt know what to make for you." His smile, seems endless right now.
"No this is fine," he says, grabbing plates from their shelves. I plate the food, hoping that he won't say anything about this.
"What did you want to do today?" I ask as we sit my chopsticks already in my food. He looks down at the floor, his eyes somewhat sad. I know what is going through his mind. He won't remember what my cooking tastes like tomorrow, won't remember how it tasted to eat the food of his lover. I sigh. "It's fine, just eat it before it gets cold." I don't look his way, knowing that his face will be shocked at first, but then it will turn to annoyance.
"I am," he says, his voice slightly louder than it was. I smile. "I have to go to the shop today, like always." He smiles, his eyes alive. "I don't know when I'm going to get a day off, and even when I do have them, I end up doing something for her in the end." He laughs at this. I don't respond he just keeps talking. It's nice to just sit and listen to him, speak his mind, knowing that he will voice his opinions and thoughts out loud, and if he doesn't his face is the easiest thing to read.
15 weeks later
I watch Doumeki closely, waiting for him to ask me to leave, for me to be quiet, for me to get out of his life.
I am expecting it. I will always be waiting for the moment when he tells me he doesn't want me around. That I am too troublesome to be in his life.
"What's up with that look?" he asks, his tone soft, almost a caress. I feel my eyes widen, not enough for him to notice hopefully.
"What are you talking about?" I say, praying that my thoughts weren't written on my face. I laugh to cover anything up.
"Never mind," he says, and goes back to eating the lunch I have made him. Maru and Moro watch us from the doorway, smiling as we exchange words.
"How's school?" I ask, changing the topic suddenly.
"Oh its fine. Himawari says that she misses your food, and our comedy act." I nod.
"And your studies?" he looks at me like I'm missing part of my brain.
"I'm passing of course," I try to hide my pleased smile from him. I'm not bringing him down in any way, aside from him refusing to leave my side. We talk about pleasant things, and when I'm tired enough, I head to my room, not surprised when Doumeki says he's going to spend the night, again. I crawl into the bed that belonged to the previous shop owner and slide underneath the covers. There is a smell here that isn't Doumeki's and I cringe, hoping he won't decide to come to sleep with me. It's the smell of me, the sick me. I had run a high fever for three days, and he hadn't come to the shop those days. And I had forgotten to change the sheets.
But all of that isn't on my mind as I try to drift off to sleep, wondering when he is going to join me in the bed.
Watanuki looked different tonight, Doumeki thought as he took the last couple of sips of the alcohol in front of him. He had looked off somehow, like he had had shadows beneath his eyes, and how his skin seemed paler somehow. Maybe something had happened while he was away. He would ask Makona tomorrow, seeing as how the black ball was passed out in Maru's arms.
He walked down the corridor, wondering if Watanuki was still awake, waiting for him in the bedroom. They had yet to call anything theirs, mainly because Watanuki believed Yukko would come back, come back to run the shop and order him around, and make his days fun, and sometimes life threatening. But Doumeki knew that he missed it.
As he entered the room, he heard the calm breathing of his lover, and was almost soothed as he slid out of his clothes and into the bed. Doumeki reached out for Watanuki's warm body, drawing it against his own for both the warmth and to be closer to him than he was before.
"Mm, Doumeki," he heard Watanuki murmur and kissed his forehead.
"Yes?" he whispers. "Your warm." Was the answer he got. "of course I am," he said,"im with you."
Well this should be a good second chapter, what with me giving the characters some happy time before the real stuff starts.
Until the next time.