Disclaimer: I do not own South of Nowhere.
Chapter 2: Paradise Lost?
Kyla Woods entered her loft seven minutes after midnight. She didn't know what to expect, but it was Spencer and Ashley so it could be anything from a cuddle fest to broken dishes to the naked tango. Even more so Kyla didn't know what she wanted to see. As horrible as walking in and seeing everything would be it would mean that Ashley was happy again, whole again as clichéd as that was. Even the debris from an all out rage war would be comforting to come home to, at least then everybody's favorite couple would be working things out. After all you didn't get angry at someone if you didn't love them just as much or more. So when Kyla opened her door and found the living area, as it wasn't actually a room with four walls, and found nothing but the blue screen of the television signaling the DVD was done playing she was disappointed. Kyla groaned, Ashley always did that. That girl just did not know how to turn the DVD player and television off, or she just didn't because she knew how much it annoyed Kyla. On second thought, it was probably the latter, that fit her personality much better.
Kyla sighed, turned off the machines, then walked into her bedroom. It was late and she was tired. Dealing with Ashley, the crying miserable mess of Ashley Davies, was very draining. Plus she spent the last few hours clubbing with a couple of hot strangers. That was also very draining, especially since it started and ended on the dance floor. She was hoping for some after hours bedroom activities but apparently the guy had a jealous girlfriend. Kyla was lucky to just get away without being bitch slapped.
She saw her bed, unmade just as she liked it, and collapsed into it. She flung her flip flops at the wall, they hit with a thud, and Kyla closed her eyes, sleepily pulling the covers over her body. She wondered, hazily, if Ashley was okay after the Spencer Carlin hanging out session. She hoped that Ashley hadn't gone and ruined all hope of them getting back together. She shook her head and mumbled to herself, she didn't have anymore energy in her to worry about her half sister's love life.
Ashley woke up to a thud, thud of shoes hitting the wall. She wondered if that was just a little weird. And then she remembered the course of the night, the movies, the tearful confrontation, the wild make out session, the tattoo, the bruises… she shivered at the thought of someone hurting her Spencer, because yes, Spencer did belong to her. She looked over to her side, hoping that it wasn't all a dream, she hoped mildly that the bruises and more so the reason of the bruises were just a nightmare. But as she saw the dark purplish green marking on the faintly moonlit undergarment clad Spencer she knew it was not a nightmare, it was her own personal hell.
She rolled over pressing her body as close as she possibly could to the wounded blonde. If there were open wounds to lick, Ashley would, but these wounds were deep and cutting into the very soul of Spencer. Ashley wished for pitch darkness, for the blinds to be pulled down and the window to close. Because no matter what people say about the soul and true love there was something creepy and unnerving about seeing the mechanics of someone's being. And it was disturbingly clear that Spencer needed a mechanic. Ashley, as much as she loved the girl, was not very good at fixing these, she was usually more destructive when it came to helping someone heal.
Ashley's soul sighed. She couldn't fix Spencer and Spencer needed to be fixed. She couldn't do anything but hold the girl while she tried to sleep off the waking nightmare of reality, and that was purely for her own selfish reasons.
The brunette leaned over and placed a kiss on the blonde's forehead. It wasn't much, because it wasn't supposed to be much. It was just a kiss, it didn't have any emotions tied to it. It was just something she felt compelled to do. She heard the younger girl moan slightly before she snuggled into the warm embrace encircling her. Ashley smiled. Spencer was always lonely in bed, always seeking out warmth, no matter how scathing hot it was outside. Some things never changed. Ashley thought that this, just laying in bed together, being intimate without actually being intimate, felt normal. Or as close to normal as one could get considering the circumstances. Because Ashley had a long time ago, when she realized she like girls the same way she liked boys, figured out that there is no such thing as normal. Normal was just a word some ancient Englishman came up with to describe the feeling of 'this is right', and even then it was just a perception of what feels right.
Ashley closed her eyes, tired of philosophizing. Ashley closed her eyes so she could imagine that the Spencer she was holding in her arms was the same innocent one who still prayed every night even though she wasn't sure of her faith anymore, instead of the broken shell of a girl who just lost her brother and couldn't find it in herself to move on. But mostly, Ashley imagined that the Spencer in her arms was her girlfriend, not her former lover/maybe current lover.
Glen woke up in a cold sweat, just as he had been every night since a eleven days after prom. He didn't scream out "Gun" this time, as his mother wasn't already in his room trying to soothe him out of his confusion, because his father was standing there offering him a glass of water, and his sister wasn't there to tear down any feel better walls their mother was able to construct. Or maybe he did scream out, and this time nobody came running. It was time for him to grow up and deal with it himself.
Eleven nights after prom the nightmares started, the night terrors, because that is truly what they were, that he thought he deserved. Glen was a horrible man, and a disgraceful brother. He deserved these waking dreams.
His mother thought that Glen yelled out 'gun', because he was afraid. But Glen had enlisted in the army because at one point he wanted to be in the army. No, Glen was not afraid of guns, no more than anyone else who lived through the shooting. His father thought that Glen was still grieving Clay, still reliving the night of his brother's death. And what did Spencer think? Glen didn't want to know. And what did Glen think? He thought, after having seen the documentary, that Ashley was right, everyone got buried somehow.
Glen woke up reliving the night with a different ending, one which left Clay alive and well, one which left him to watch the life slowly drain out of the blue eyes of his baby sister. Glen couldn't even take joy in the fact that his brother was alive, because Spencer dying, even in his nightly horror film, hurt more than Clay's real life death ever did. Waking up, even to see her emotionlessly tell them that they had no family, was enough to make Glen's heart swell, 'thank god she was alive'. It was in those moments that Clay's death had left no impact on him. And Glen hated himself for this fact. Because it is so blatantly clear, now, that blood did separate him and Clay as brothers. It made Glen want to die.
Eleven days after prom, after they buried Clay in the ground, Glen sat idly by watching the life drain ever so slowly and excruciatingly out of his little sisters eyes. He watched her die in everyway except the one that counts. He watched as everybody, including himself, was too consumed in their own grief to even notice that she had given up on living. His nightmare was anything but.
Suddenly unable to stay in his room, trying to even his breathing, Glen had to see Spencer. He needed to be reassured that her heart was still pumping blood and oxygen. He needed to be reassured that he still had a sister to hug when things got too rough. He tiptoed, sniffling every step, to her room. He flung open the door and was met with the still of the night. There was nobody. Spencer was not in her bed on a school night, trying to sleep like everybody else in this family who stayed up until exhaustion just took over. He collapsed to the floor and started to wail like a baby. He didn't care if his neighbors in China could hear him. This hurt. He could have sworn that he and Spencer got tattoos and milkshakes together. He looked down at his ankle and ripped the gauze pad off. He stared at it for a long time, making sure the 'C' wasn't actually an 'S'. He remembered he dropped her off at Ashley's loft. She was probably still there pretending to be alive.
He ran back to his room and grabbed his cell phone. He'd call, make sure she was okay, that he hadn't lost both of them, when he really had, he only had one tombstone to visit though.
Spencer woke up to the sound of the 'ghost busters' theme song from her cell phone in the living room. She found herself regretting the extra high volume setting she'd chosen. She regretted even more knowing she had to answer it. It was Glen. Whatever it was it was important. She wrenched herself out of the warmth of Ashley's cuddle, feeling the cold as soon as she does. For a minute she wants to forget about Glen.
She walks into the living room and catches Kyla's sleepy eyes open wide at her appearance. It must not have been obvious that she stayed the night. She mouthed 'sorry' to Kyla, because it was obvious her cell phone had woken her up. Kyla didn't retreat back to her room though. Spencer assumed she wanted to chat some after the phone call. She ignored it and answered the phone.
"Hello." Her voice was groggy, it sounded as though she'd just woken up, which she did.
"Thank you god! You're alive." She heard her brother cry into the phone. She felt her heart break. Glen had had another nightmare.
"Do you need me to come home?" She asked, slightly more awake.
"No. You should stay. Try and sleep, you know." She nodded and though he couldn't see it, he definitely knew she had.
"Um. It'll be alright you know. You're home and safe…" He cut her off with a semi laugh.
"Spence, seriously? I don't want comfort, I want the truth." He did want comfort, but coming from Spencer it sounded alien and gave him goose bumps. Things were changing again.
"You're right. We're not safe, we never will be. There is no such thing as being safe. And you're only in the comforts of a house, not a home. We're not even a family anymore, I doubt we ever will be." She said flat and in monotone much as she had done every night since. It killed Glen to hear her tone and her words, but it was the only thing that qualified as normal lately.
Ashley heard the phone ring and ignored it. She was comfortable and didn't want to move. But Spencer, her sleeping beauty, had gotten up to answer the cellular device. Ashley was cold without Spencer in her arms. And she also realized, she was topless. She grabbed a tank top and put it on quickly to make sure Spencer wasn't going to just leave her to wake up in bed alone.
She heard Spencer answer in her sleep voice, which Ashley thought was so incredibly cute. She followed the sound out to the living space and saw Spencer talking and Kyla just staring at her. This wouldn't exactly be a problem if Spencer weren't in her bra and panties. She shot a look at her sister, who obviously sensed the bad vibes and pointed to the bandage on Spencer's thigh, probably thinking the same thing she had earlier. Ashley, not wanting Kyla to freak out and into damage control mode, lifted her shirt slightly and pointed to her tattoo. Kyla nodded and her mouth made the 'O' shape as she understood. Then her eyebrows scrunched together and Ashley shrugged, amazed they could understand each other without words. Kyla was referring to the location of the body ink.
Ashley and Kyla both froze as the conversation took a turn. Spencer's voice was cold and uncaring. There was no inflection and it sounded lifeless. Ashley refrained from gasping or doing anything that would draw attention to her eavesdropping.
Spencer yawned. And the conversation was back to normal. Well about as normal as a three A.M. conversation.
"I'm really tired. Are you sure you don't want me to go home?" They heard her ask and Ashley hoped whoever it was on the other line said no.
"Okay. Ew…Oh whatever…fine! I love you too… Are you happy now? Well that just sucks. Goodnight." Spencer attempted to end the conversation, but whoever it was seemed to want to keep talking. Spencer yawned again, much more dramatically than before.
"Look you can sleep in my bed or whatever, if it helps….Glen! No that doesn't mean you can do whatever. You are sick." Ashley stepped closer to Spencer in hopes to hear what Glen was saying. Eavesdropping was so annoying.
"Yeah I am, but you're dead." Ashley's jaw dropped open. What did Glen mean by that?
"What? No I'm not. Glen maybe I should come home. You shouldn't be alone right now." Spencer frowned at his comment. Is that what he dreams about? Her dying? Or does he think she's down so much she might as well be dead.
"Little sis, I was just kidding. Have fun or whatever. But just so you know I do not condone what you do, or rather who you do. And neither does god by the way."
"Shut the fuck up Glen." Kyla was shocked at the curse word coming from Spencer. She'd never heard Spencer swear before and it didn't sound right. Ashley had only head Spencer say that word a handful or times and it was always when Ashley would tease her in bed. It always turned her on when Spencer swore, and it took all her will power to not yank the blonde away from the conversation and into the bedroom so she could have her wicked way with her. They were still in a much too delicate situation to be moving that fast. It almost made Ashley feel relieved that they hadn't gone that far a few hours ago. Almost.
Spencer hung up the phone after saying goodnight for the final time. She turned around to speak with Kyla, not yet seeing her almost lover.
"You wanted to talk?" It came out harsh, not what Spencer intended to do. But she didn't sleep very well as it is and to be awoken in the middle of her REM cycle made her really cranky.
"I'm sorry, that came out wrong. I'm just really tired and I don't sleep very well anymore." For some reason Spencer found it easy to just be herself around Kyla. Kyla didn't expect anything from her, she could just listen and understand. She got caught up in the mess too.
"It's okay. We can talk another time." Kyla didn't want to talk in front of Ashley. Sure the girl was her sister but Kyla still couldn't relate to her. Spencer obviously knew about bad dreams and the after effects of a traumatic events. Ashley moved on seamlessly, not giving it a second thought that someone tried to kill her.
Ashley was confused. Why would Kyla want to talk to Spencer? It was too early in the morning to think. Instead of dwelling on it, Ashley drew Spencer into a hug from behind. She felt Spencer jump slightly, obviously having not anticipated the embrace.
"Come back to bed, baby." The brunette whispered into the blonde's ear. Spencer shivered as hot breath hit the skin right under her ear. Ashley noticed and smirked. She leaned in further and started to kiss that particular spot.
"I'm so out of here. Have fun guys." Kyla laughed while putting her hand over her eyes to show how repulsed she is at their affection display. They both knew she was happy for the two, glad to see her sister smile for real again.
"If you're teasing me, then stop. I really am tired. It really does take me a few hours to fall back to sleep. So if you're going to wake me up further, I suggest you make it worth my while." Ashley stopped, not because she actually cared what Spencer was saying, but because she didn't want to leave any markings on the girl, even a love bite. Spencer still had a girlfriend, an abusive one at that. She didn't want to intentionally put Spencer in harms way. Plus, she didn't want to go there. Sure, she was worse than a teenage boy when it came to being intimate with Spencer, but still Spencer's mind was fragile.
"Let's go to sleep baby. We have a lot to talk about in the morning." Ashley whispered. It sent chills down Spencer's spine and induced her fight or flight instinct. But exhaustion took over and the blonde just yawned and nodded her head. She could run from the inevitable conversation in the morning.
The two sort of lovers went to their bedroom and laid down on the bed. Ashley pulled the covers up to their waists. It wasn't really cold in southern California, and especially not when you're cuddled up against another body. The singer laid flat on her back and Spencer went to her automatic position, with her head resting on Ashley's chest so she could hear the brunette's heart beat. Spencer closed her eyes and concentrated on the 'thump thump' and soon found herself fast asleep.
"Spence?" Ashley heard her breathing quiet and even out. She thought Spencer said something about it taking a few hours to fall back to sleep. She wondered if she was the cure to the blonde's insomnia, or if Spencer had simply lied. In any case, she was happy that Spencer's head was resting on her chest just like it used to whenever they shared a bed.
Paula and Arthur returned home after a long drive around the city. They had yelled and cried and then it was just time to get out and wander. They didn't go to the cemetery, it would be too final. They just drove around in little circles. It was extremely early when they entered the house so they tried their best to be quiet, tiptoeing around all the squeaky floor boards. Arthur opted to check on the children while Paula just went to the bedroom. He opened Glen's room and found the boy sleeping peacefully. He opened his daughter's room expecting her to be awake and miserable, instead he found a lump of pillows under the covers. Spencer wasn't home. It frightened him and relieved him as well. Fear was a powerful emotion and overrun all his feelings of relief. He grabbed his cell phone and dialed her number.
"hush little baby, don't you cry, Papa's gonna buy you a diamond ring"
"And if that diamond ring won't shine, Papa's going to buy you" Kyla found herself signing to the ring tone of the blasted cell phone in the living quarters. She rolled out of bed and made a grab for it. She didn't know what Spencer and Ashley were doing, they were quiet, which was unusual for them. And if Spencer was sleeping she didn't want the poor girl to wake up.
"Hello?" Her voice cracked but she didn't care considering the time of morning.
"Spencer?" It was deep older voice. So Kyla assumed it was either her pimp or her father.
"Mr. Carlin?" She took a guess.
"Yeah, who's this?"
"Kyla. Ashley's sister." She clarified in case he didn't know who she was.
"yeah, I remember you." She smiled for some reason for some unknown reason.
"So, I'm assuming since you're answering Spencer's phone that she's with you. Am I correct in that assumption" He asked, feeling his fear dwindling away. He was happy that Spencer found support in her friends at such a trying time. He smiled, proud that his little girl grew up and learned to accept help when she needed it.
"Actually she's with Ashley." Arthur's smile faltered. He loved his daughter and he loved Ashley but the two of them together was never a relief. If Spencer was with Ashley then she was putting off actually coming to terms with her problems. Instead she was creating more.
"Oh." He didn't really have anything to say to that. He couldn't very well demand Kyla go and wake his daughter and bring her home. And he couldn't actually say that he thought Ashley would harm his fragile daughter's psyche.
"Yeah, I know it's strange. But they make each other happy." Arthur tried to remember the last time he saw Spencer happy, it was prom night when she came down the stairs and laid eyes on Ashley.
"I just don't want to her to get hurt, anymore than she already is." Kyla nodded feeling like she was in the middle of some big mystery. The more she observed and listened to Spencer the more she came to the conclusion that the girl just wasn't alright and she worried that maybe her sister was getting into something she couldn't handle.
"Well, I'm sorry to wake you up, Kyla. My kids never tell me anything these days." He laughed slightly. Kyla said goodbye and went back to her room to sleep. If that phone rings one more time she'd have to throw it against the wall.
Ashley woke up feeling very content. And why wouldn't she? She had Spencer in her arms. She looked down at the blonde and smiled. She loved waking up to messy, strewn everywhere hair. It felt right. She looked over at the alarm clock, it was half past eleven in the morning. She couldn't believe she slept that long. She couldn't believe Spencer, miss I never sleep past ten, was still asleep. The brunette thought about waking up the girl in her arms and lecturing her on wasting half her day just by over sleeping, but in the end she decided to let the blonde sleep, she really needed it. In the mean time, however, Ashley was faced with a dilemma: should she stay still in the highly comfortable position she was in and risk wetting herself, the blonde, and the bed or did she move and go to the bathroom risking waking up the blonde and possibly never returning to the same position. She couldn't decide, she didn't want to wake the girl who oh so clearly needed the sleep, but her bladder was really difficult to ignore. She moved a little, to try and hold it in better. She moved again, finding that no position she moved to would make her forget about having to go number one.
"Oh just go to the bathroom already." The not so sleeping girl sighed. Ashley did not wake her up with her endless moving or her volcanic erupting snores (which Ashley was to never know about because then the drama queen would be even more self conscious than she already was and they'd never be able to do anything. Spencer actually thought it was cute and so telling to Ashley's personality; small girl, big personality). Spencer woke up at around ten because she could never sleep past the hour, she just laid there with her eyes closed for the last hour and a half just listening to Ashley's heartbeat and snores, the rhythm was so melodic and put her mind to peace. She was able to calmly assess the last few months of her life, acknowledge her mistakes. She made no efforts into fixing them or coming to terms with why she had a particular problem. She reflected on Clay's death and the prom shooting but when she felt the tears well up in her eyes she stopped and thought about how nice Ashley smelled. Of course that made her think about why her and Ashley failed, and then about Carmen. She knew she had to decide, and she hated it. She hated it especially since she gave Ashley that ultimatum, the circumstances were different but still… In the end Spencer just didn't want anybody to hurt, especially herself.
Ashley laughed and smacked Spencer, playfully, because she would never hurt Spencer, intentional or not, on the nose. She moved and made a mad dash to the bathroom. She turned over her shoulder and smiled, so glad that she got Spencer back. Spencer smiled back. Ashley thought it looked a little sad but she didn't want to dwell on it. She closed the door and went about her business.
The door closed and Spencer panicked. The calm she had felt when Ashley was near had disappeared and all her cruel realities came flying at her all at once. She had just cheated on her girlfriend, she had gotten another woman's, her ex's, first initial tattooed on her, and she had skipped school. She blinked long and hard and sighed loudly. Her mother would have her head on a silver platter, only the best for Paula, for skipping class, no excuses accepted.
"Uhhhhh!" She groaned in frustration. She wished she could live someone else's life. A fictional television or movie character's life. Someone that was only real for an hour or two and then faded away into the backdrop. She wished she could have a scripted life, instead of this reality TV. life. She wanted to know the end of the novel before starting the book. She wanted something easy.
Spencer wanted to escape her life, her shitty life, and climb into a tree house and read children's books and watch unbelievably bad teenager movies. She wanted to fall into a coma and wake up when all the drama surrounding her had moved away. She wanted to run away, again, but never look back. She loves what's left of her family, she loves Ashley and Carmen but she just can't deal with it. She wants to run away and start a new life, change her name too. She'll work in a crappy diner and meet creepy characters. She'll live in a small cockroach infested apartment and eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for breakfast and dinner, for lunch she'd eat a greasy burger at the diner. She wants to be anywhere but here. The door opened, tearing Spencer away from her fantasies (life has to suck pretty badly to fantasize about that), she looked up at Ashley and smiled.
"Hey you." Ashley smiled back and ran and jumped on the bed, taking Spencer, who was in the sitting position, down with her. They both laughed for a minute or two, just being two teenage girls.
"Hey, back." Spencer greeted. She looked at Ashley and wished she could choose her. But she couldn't. She knew she couldn't.
Ashley leaned in to kiss Spencer and was mildly surprised when the girl pulled back. Ashley sighed, she knew it was too good to be true. She just hopes the only thing Spencer can ramble on about is her crazy concept of being treated too well. Ashley could deflect that, and will.
"What is it?" Her voice was so sad and Spencer looked down. She doesn't want to hurt Ashley.
"I still have a girlfriend." It wasn't by any means a choice, it was just something to put off the inevitable.
"She hurts you." Ashley couldn't understand why Spencer put up with that shit. She couldn't understand why Spencer would choose that over herself.
"You hurt me." Ashley blinked rapidly for thirty seconds, trying really hard to understand that comment, trying even harder to not break down in tears.
"No." It was all she could croak out. She started crying because the idea of hurting Spencer killed her inside.
"Don't cry, Ash." Spencer made a move to comfort the crying girl but Ashley just pulled back putting her palm out to make Spencer stop.
"That's not really what I meant. It's just, Carmen, she might…"
"Might! Might! Are you fucking… Might?" Ashley sniffled outraged and pointed to the bruises.
"Fine, whatever! But you hurt me inside. How can I protect myself from that? I hurt enough as it is, I can't just… let you in only so you can, so you can, make things feel, I don't know." Spencer started crying too. She wanted nothing more than to leave. It took her a second to realize she could, no one was keeping her here. She got up and searched frantically for her clothes. She started dressing once she found the missing garments.
"What are you doing?" The voice startled Spencer and she jumped up. She wasn't expecting Ashley to say anything, everything had already been said, or was that just in her mind?
"I'm leaving." Spencer answered as she buttoned her pants up.
"No. Why are you choosing her over me?" The question was painful for Ashley to ask and based on the silence that met her it must be a painful question to answer.
Spencer sat down on the edge of the bed. She looked at her shirt in her hands and tried to think up a response. She hadn't expected that question because she hadn't realized she'd chosen Carmen, who just last night had resolved herself to break up with..
"I…uh. I didn't think I was." Ashley sighed.
"What the hell kind of answer is that? Spencer, seriously, slap yourself silly or something. You. Aren't. Thinking. Right!" The brunette tried to stop herself from talking, she wasn't thinking right either.
"Jesus Ashley! I'm fucked up, okay. I don't know anything anymore. And what I do know, it scares me okay? I'm sorry. I just… I'm sorry." Spencer sighed and put her shirt on. Ashley was silent, processing what the blonde had said.
"You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. Right now, I don't care what I am to you. It's just, right now, I'm not right. For you. I mean look at me. I'm not stable, I want someone to beat the crap out of me, I liked how much the tattoo hurt, I fantasize about living in a dump. I can't… let you save me, because I don't want to be saved. And even if I did, you shouldn't be…saving me." She spilled her heart out to more silence before walking out to the living room to find her shoes.
Ashley sat there trying to absorb everything Spencer had said. She wanted to fight and run away. Her fight or flight response was completely paralyzed. She watched her love leave the room and knew she had to think fast. She finally stood up and marched, determined, to the living space. She stomped over to Spencer and grabbed her wrist, roughly, and yanked on it making the girl turn around and face her and then Ashley kissed her.
"Enough!" She growled into Spencer's ear as her tongue drew circles right underneath it.
"No more word games, no more nothing!" Her hands trailed upward from the blonde's wrist to her hips and upwards to her breasts. She grabbed at them, loving the feeling and knew Spencer felt the same way.
Spencer leaned forward to kiss Ashley but the brunette stopped all action and pulled away. A foot now stood between them. Spencer looked into brown eyes, searching for an answer but finding nothing but an emotionless stone wall.
"You want? Then say so." Ashley barked.
"I want." Spencer answered without a thought. Her voice was traced with lust which wasn't good enough for Ashley. She wanted Spencer to want all of her, not her body.
"You want to be bad, don't you?" Ashley's voice was raspy and husky. If only Ashley was more into it, with a video camera too. Spencer nodded rapidly, loving this game.
"That fucking sucks. I don't want you." She dropped the sexy voice and shot teary daggers at Spencer, hoping she'd get the point but knowing she wouldn't.
"What? Why?" A blonde question from a blonde's mouth. It was so poetic.
"Get the hell out of my house!" It wasn't a house, semantics. She knew she made her point known as fearful Spencer came out to play and scampered away to the door. The door closed quietly, because Spencer knew not slamming it would irk Ashley more.
"I'm so sorry Spence." She collapsed on her spot on the floor, crying once again, trying so hard to convince herself that she did the right thing, letting Spencer go. No relationship between the two of them would last. She needed Spencer, her Spencer, to come back, and before she's lost forever.
Ashley pulled herself together, wiped the tears from her eyes and hopped into the shower. She had to save Spencer, without Spencer knowing. She had to talk to Mr. And Mrs. Carlin before it was too late.
A/N: Hopefully i didn't lose you in the middle there, i am aware it got a little boring. Sorry, i hope i made up for it in the end. I have no idea what chapter 3 will be like, but i'm thinking of a carmen/spencer interaction, maybe a carmen/ashley fight, some more in depth character analysis. Oh and yes, i do know i am evil with splitting them up when everything was going strong, i did that for two reasons, them being together right now would make for a dead end story. Second, the more reviews i get the sooner there will be spashley bliss. Thanks for reading, i loved all the reviews i got. Tell me what you think, what you want to happen, etc. i love feedback.