"Hn." Itachi said as he evaluated his and Naruto's new home, which had previously simply been Naruto's apartment. It was obvious that the place was being maintained by a not-quite-eight year-old child.

The wedding, which had taken place that afternoon, had been arranged in a surprisingly short amount of time, considering the fact that it was a wedding between the son of the Head of the Uchiha Clan and the descendant of the Head of the Uzumaki. Apparently, the clan had all taken his father's "Let's get this mess over with as quickly as possible" as an unbreakable order and had everything arranged by lunchtime, including the catering which had been overseen by the Uzumaki who'd been chased by a couple of tailors who'd swiftly taken a number of measurements. Honestly, the only wedding of a member of the Clan Head's family which had been arranged faster had been the Swordpoint wedding of Uchiha Izuna.

His father had been inspecting his formal clothing less than half an hour after they'd departed the Hokage Tower to see if it would be up to par considering it had been months since he'd last worn it, and had grown some since then, when his mother had appeared in the doorway and gave a nervous cough that was so utterly out of character for her that his and his father's Sharingan had reflexively activated.

"What now?" his father grumbled, knowing that nothing good would come from his wife's odd behaviour.

"Well, um, you see, I, I, uh, lost a bet years ago, and there were witnesses who are still alive, who um, might remember, and might comment if I welsh?" Mikoto had said, looking like she'd wanted to avoid the situation entirely.

"What were the stakes?" his father asked resignedly, looking like he was dreading the answer.

"I'm sorry Itachi..." his mother said, looking genuinely sorry as she came over, placed a hand on her elder son's shoulder and started guiding him from his room and to her and his father's bedroom.

Once in there, his mother had gone over to a certain heirloom chest where she pulled out a wedding kimono that had been hers and her mother's before her, and her mother's before her.

"Dear God! You went out drinking with the Uzumaki woman after I told you not to, didn't you!" Fugaku exclaimed. "Even more than seven years dead, she's still wrecking my life!"

An hour and a half later, looking into the mirror once he was dressed and his hair had been done, even he was willing to admit that he looked pretty. Thing was, he didn't want to look pretty on his wedding day. That was the bride's job, and neither of the people taking their wedding vows that day were a bride in any way, shape, or form.

A good number of people gaped when they saw him in his wedding kimono. Especially a number of very important and very hastily invited guests who had somehow managed to show up well dressed and with appropriate gifts despite the short notice. When it came to family and friends, Sasuke had been sobbing the entire time and Shisui spent the entire wedding ceremony in convulsions of silent laughter as tears of mirth flowed from his eyes. He wasn't the only one laughing. One of Itachi's best female friends whom he was well aware had a massive crush on him was also doing her best to not make a sound as an entirely too serious looking Naruto who was dressed in formal men's attire came up to him and took his hand, reminding him of Sasuke when he was trying to conform to the manner in which he thought a Uchiha was supposed to behave.

All too soon, the wedding ceremony which had been presided over by an ancient and wandering Uchiha who had had wandered into some interesting stories that weren't pertinent to the situation at hand, and had to tell the Uzumaki child who was three months younger than Sasuke what to do several times during said ceremony was over. Itachi's humiliation which he constantly had to remind himself he was going through in order to save his clan was not over however. His clan had set up a rather nicely catered reception complete with what was probably the best wedding cake available on such short notice.

Naruto's face when he'd seen the spread had been absolutely priceless, and his comment of "If this is what getting married is like, I should do it more often" had set even some Uchiha to snickering. Sasuke, who had managed to end up in a fight with Naruto near the end of the reception, had looked strangely expectant every time Shisui had approached him throughout the party during which too many people were looking far too amused. Their amusement causing his father and a number of other Uchiha to scowl in a way that worried Itachi, considering the reason he'd decided to go through with marrying Naruto in the first place.

Eventually, it was all over, everyone but the drunks who'd taken the marriage of the Clan Head's Son as an excuse to party the night away, packed it in, and Itachi, who knew that there were many who wouldn't stand for it if Naruto spent even one night in the Uchiha Compound, had gone in, changed, packed a few things, and followed Naruto home to what was now their apartment.

The apartment at first glance, and second glance, and even closer examination, was quite frankly a dump. A big reason it was a dump was that Naruto had been minimally supervised since he'd entered the Academy a few months earlier, and the constant stream of ninja who used to come through and clean up the place at least a little bit and replace the wrecked furniture after Naruto pulled some stupid stunt had dried up to nothing, leaving the small boy to his own inadequate devices.

"So," Naruto said, looking uncharacteristically nervous. "What are we supposed to do now?"

Were those dirty underwear on the kitchen counter?!

"Uh, Nee-chan?" Naruto asked, his usual loudness returning, drawing Itachi out of his observations.

"You, Naruto-kun are going to get ready for bed," Itachi said. "And I'm..."

"I'm going to start cleaning this pigsty." Itachi sighed, part of him inwardly grumbling over the fact that he wasn't going to be paid for this despite the fact that it was obviously a Mid-level D-Rank. A solo mid-level D-Rank.

Naruto headed off into the bathroom presumably to shower while Itachi started getting the kitchen sorted out, doing a preliminary assay of the cupboards. After confirming that the cupboards were indeed stocked about how he'd expect a cash-strapped seven year-old with a ramen obsession to stock them, Itachi worked up the courage to deal with the Dirty! underwear on the kitchen counter, which were apparently awaiting washing as soon as the mud covered shorts in the sink were done soaking.

"I didn't hear a toothbrush" Itachi found himself automatically saying upon hearing the bathroom door open and small feet patter towards the apartment's sole bedroom, instincts born of practically raising Sasuke coming to the fore.

There was a small "Eeep" and the pattering of feet reversed their direction and headed back to the bathroom.

As soon as Itachi had finished fishing the clothes out of the sink and off the counter, dumping them in a laundry pile to be dealt with later, and gotten the counter and the small cooktop cleaned, he started on an inventory of what else needed to be done about the place.

Short answer, Everything.

The cleanest thing in the apartment was the small pyjama clad boy who was curled up on the platform bed in the bedroom rather unconvincingly pretending to sleep. How he'd gotten so clean in such a filthy bathroom, he didn't know.

As he was debating asking Naruto why he wasn't sleeping, there was a rapping on the window which startled him. Looking out, he could understand how he'd been surprised.

"Taicho" Itachi said, mentally debating whether or not it would be prudent to go over to the window and invite his former Captain in. Being aware of who Naruto's mother was, he was consequently familiar with who Naruto's father was. The Yondaime's associates tended to be a mixed bag when it came to their attitudes towards the Uzumaki boy. A good number of them blamed him for the Yondaime's death, since he had sacrificed his life to seal the Kyuubi within the child. It was very possible that Namikaze Minato's former student fell into this category. He had not seen the Hatake go out of his way to interact with the child before, which pointed to there being evidence of this fact.

The Hatake who showed no signs of leaving signed something highly uncomplimentary at him, making it clear that if he didn't allow him entrance, he'd be entering without the permission of the homeowner(s). Showing no outward sign that the signs had bothered him in any way, Itachi smoothly crossed over to the window and opened it enough for his former Captain to enter, a kunai at the ready.

"You know, if you weren't a kid, and I hadn't heard from a reliable source that the marriage was arranged, I'd have some serious questions about your character." the Silver-haired ANBU said when he entered the apartment, giving the place a once over, paying particular attention to Naruto who was making a show of snoring very loudly.

Itachi fought the slight scowl that was trying to form on his face as he noted how intently the Hatake was studying Naruto, as if checking for signs that the "Filthy Uchiha" had tried something. Like, say, turning the Kyuubi loose in the middle of the village. He would NOT turn against his fellow Konoha Shinobi like...

"His mother would be laughing her ass off right about now." the Hatake said after several seconds of silence which had seemed to stretch out into an eternity.

From what Itachi could remember of the barely remembered red-haired woman he'd encountered maybe a couple times in his life, the woman whose death his mother had almost quietly mourned following the Kyuubi attack as they had gone to see the still squalling Naruto in the hospital, Kakashi's assessment appeared to be correct.

"Yes, she would." Itachi replied, startling his former Captain.

"So, how's married life treating you?" the Hatake - who'd been quick to recover - asked casually, an amused tone creeping into his voice.

"The people who decided to teach Naruto how to be independent seem to have forgotten to show him the basics before they departed." Itachi said. "I had to clear laundry out of the kitchen sink, and that's just the start of it."

"I see..." the Hatake said, an amused look in his visible eye. "Well, seeing as I owe the two of you a wedding present, I may as well front a mission to get this place cleaned at least once."

"Thank you Taicho." Itachi said, and meant it. Really, he did. The prospect of cleaning the place had been daunting to say the least.