Clara closed her eyes again, oblivious to her impending doom. The mechanical whirrs of the TARDIS began to soothe Clara to sleep on the bench, when another pain began. This pain did not emanate from Clara's stomach, but from her bowels. The pain was searing, as if a million microscopic needles were sticking into her anus simultaneously. Clara sat upright almost immediately. Hey eyes opened completely and her mouth gaped open. She put her hand on her bottom, and looked at it for a moment.
"Oh no. No, no, no, no!"
She reached underneath her short skirt and into her panties. She carefully touched her anus and prepared for the next pain segment. When the pain in her bowels began again, she tensed up and pushed slightly, trying not to let anything slip out accidentally. She squeezed out a gigantic fart which echoed off of the TARDIS walls. The squelching explosion made her hand soggy and immediately, Clara smelled the familiar stench. Space squid! Once the gas had ceased, Clara slowly opened her eyes and felt around in her panties for any feces. Besides her now extremely damp hand, nothing was new underneath her skirt. Clara exhaled with relief. She stood up from the bench, swiftly pulling her hand out from her skirt and wiping its dampness away on her dress. She began instinctually walking towards the bathroom with a casual stride, humming a tune as she walked, when she stopped. She looked around the TARDIS' door entrances, looking for some kind of sign, some kind of direction! But there was none. There was no bathroom. Clara's bowels began to empty, and she held it in desperately. She stomped her foot on the metal floor, screaming with a scowl.
"The Doctor is going to make me shit myself!"