"Uwaaahh~!" Lovino shrieked, fleshy scarlet cheeks blown back by the g-force of plunging down the abysmal pit. The Italian flailed his arms about wildly, frantically groping around for a ledge or branch of some sort to grab onto, though his task ended with no prevail. He continued to plummet, weighed down like a boulder by the extra load carried by the dress. Wait- the dress! Perhaps he could attempt to use said item to help him float down to the bottom… possibly like a parachute? It was certainly worth a try, assuming he would eventually descend to his ultimate doom on the rocky floor that surely existed below. He took in a sharp inhale, holding his breath as he braced himself, placing his lithe fingers just so on the ruffled edges and expanding his arms' breadth with what he hoped desperately to be the utmost precision. Almost… almost-! He thought, smirking with success as he felt his pride swelling from within; surely his plan was beyond foolproof?
And Lovino promptly struck the solid ground below, hard, with a dull thud. "Oh, my head…" he groaned, rubbing at a swollen bump atop his head, flinching at the touch to his own tender flesh. Releasing a cry of exasperation, the man-in-a-dress tugged mercilessly at the fabrics clothed upon his body, though not a single bit of tugging seemed to undo their firm hold on his masculine figure."They just don't make these godforsaken things the way they used to! Ugh… now where'd Feliciano go?" Lovino stood up shakily from his spot, baffled as to how he had managed to survive such a lengthy nose-dive. His amber eyes blinked once, twice, before finally focusing in on a single, dim glow emitting from the distance. And, as if fate had played out in a way that was astonishingly favorable to the gruff Italian (for once), there strode the familiar shadow of his rabbit-brother, bouncing about in a hoppy frenzy.
"Ve~! I have to hurry!" sounded the obnoxious voice of his younger sibling, the shadow disappearing from behind the curve of the wall. Wasting absolutely no time (well, except to smooth out his garbs again), Lovino hastily staggered forward, legs much too unstable to support his somewhat dazed form, as his limbs were likely unwilling to proceed after his recent collision with the pleasurably stone-cold earth. Face contorting into an expression of defiant cowardice, the top half of his body toppled forward and made contact with the rocky soil once more.
For the briefest of moments, his fists clenched tight, body reluctant to move from pure fear of what was yet to come. Lovino Vargas was not, by anyone's standards, a daring man. To say the least, he was indisputably craven, a spineless coward with no true purpose in life. However, when it came to situations such as these, in which his long-eared brother could be endangered by the wurst-bastard, nothing would stand in his way. Puffing his chest out in mock bravery, Lovino dusted off his palms and rushed forward, stumbling once or twice before reaching his destination.
Or, at least, what he assumed was his destination. He soon came upon a quaint little room, covered from left to right by various doors of an intricate, olden style, clearly a wood of maple… a wood which appropriately accented the checkerboard flooring. "Alright…" he muttered aloud, voice slightly trembling in unease. "Chances are Feliciano is behind… one of these doors." His mouth dried suddenly, gums entirely deprived of any form of moisture as his hands clammed up instead. "Easy, right?" Wrong. One by one, the Italian yanked and tugged before the doors, all but groveling at their wood in his desperate attempt to stop his brother from doing anything unsightly with Ludwig. Although, he had to admit, Feliciano had been acting incredibly peculiar… disregarding the fact that he was dressed like a bunny. Perhaps this Ludwig would be different, as well?
"Oh, damn it, Feliciano! Things can never just be simple with you, can they?" Sighing with exasperation, he slumped to the floor, leaning up against the leg of a table smack-dab in the center of the room. He placed his forehead in his mud-caked hands, smearing a bit of the grime onto his facial skin in his skulking. Surely there was some way to get in? Not to mention that each door was much too petite for the lanky man to squeeze into. Come to think of it, his brother didn't differ much in height from himself… how had he managed to get out of the enclosure? Feliciano, his idiotic brother? It all but blew his mind. Desperately wishing he had just wandered home, disregarding his brother's inexplicable actions and eating his midday snack of chopped tomatoes, the young man groaned in frustration, thwacking his head in aggravation against the leg of the table.
Wait- a table? That most certainly hadn't been there earlier. Foolishly allowing curiosity to get the better of him, Lovino scratched the back of his head absentmindedly and peered above the edge of the table from his spot on the floor, knees digging into the tile flooring below uncomfortably. The tabletop was relatively empty, as desolate as the rest of the room, though it did prop up two items; a golden key engraved with foreign symbols and a bottle filled with a liquid of some sort. Hanging loosely around said bottle was a large white sign, and upon its surface was written a single message.
Drink me, baby!
What sort of perverted creep wrote that? he wondered, shaking his head incredulously. Despite his skepticism, Lovino reached forward and hesitantly removed the bottle from its spot on the tabletop, popping the cork top off and to the floor. Grimacing at its disturbingly-purple color, the Italian brought the vial up to his chapped lips, tipping his head back to allow it to trickle down his throat with more ease.
Well, if that wasn't god awful, he didn't particularly wish to find out what was. The taste of such an elixir was revolting to the point of nauseating, giving his stomach a quick churn as the last bit was swallowed hard. "Never again, Feliciano… I swear, the next time I see another rabbit-bastard, I'll- What?!" he cried, watching in a gawking awe as the world surrounding him began to expand, growing to an exceptionally colossal size. Or, perhaps, he was just shrinking; either way, something bizarre was going on, and he didn't like it one bit.
"Wh-What the hell-?" he stuttered, rubbing vigorously at his golden eyes, thinking it impossible for such a peculiar event to occur. "I must be dreaming… yes, that's it. This is all just a horrid nightmare… brought on by Francis and his unmentionable drugs, without a doubt… Oh, great, I forgot the damned key!" He smacked himself in the head, fury at himself welling up from within like an aroused flame. Indeed, gazing up in a dull melancholy from his spot on the floor, the key hung halfway off the table towering above, as if a mockery to his scattered mind. Why did life have such a cruel way of reminding him that his "good fortune" sucked?
Now what…? He thought, aimlessly gazing around nonchalantly for another way out. His eyes fell upon a single box, once again not there previously, slightly ajar with yet another of those suggestive signs resting atop, connected by a single piece of masking tape.
Bite me, bitch.
Okay, now these are seriously getting out of hand! Snorting in irritancy, Lovino flung the top of the container open entirely, revealing a single pastry, half-eaten and dripping with jelly from within its innards. Grimacing at its grueling appearance, he reluctantly tore off a bite-sized piece and forced it down his throat, swallowing without much consideration towards the taste. Hopefully, it would at least do something. Couldn't be much worse than his current state, right?
Within a few more seconds' time, Lovino Vargas was about fourteen feet taller, already-swollen head bumping crudely against the ceiling in an uncomfortable squeeze. "Oh, for crying out loud! What's going on? S-Stop!" But, alas, his growth spurt ceased to cease. "No! I don't wanna be any taller! Please, I'll do anything!" Now his nerves had begun to kick in, and the Italian found himself wailing as he continued to get pressed against the walls, cracking the plaster ever-so-slightly. "Stooop~!" he cried out, tears of terror streaking his pink cheeks and plummeting to the floor, soon flooding the room below.
"Oh!" exclaimed a familiarly-dumb voice form below. Feliciano floated aimlessly along the pool of tears, alarmed and panicky. "I sure hope I haven't kept his Highness waiting! He'll banish me, or worse, ve~! It'll be off with my-"
"F-Feliciano!" Lovino said sharply, though watched in dismay as his brother floated along the stream of saltwater tear droplets and out of sight.
Damn… now what? The grumpy Italian sat in an awkward silence, chin propped on his knuckles for the next hour or so before the effects of the pastry began to wear off and he promptly reduced down to normal size once more. Talk about sudden… he thought sarcastically, crossing his arms as he plunged into the river of rushing tears. Eh, he had grown rather used to falling by that point.
His lithe form, though weighed down even more-so than before due to the sopping dress, drifted along gently in the water, passing through the keyhole of one of the doors and out of that forsaken room. At long last, he was free… or perhaps not, as he still seemed trapped within this obscure world.
Wafting passed the Italian man's figure waded another being, a particularly irked-looking man with large, rounded ears atop his blonde head and a skinny tail curled daintily around his slight form. Said mouse-man attained the most peculiar of traits; striking emerald eyes and hair of gold, yet even these more attractable features could not avert Lovino's attention from the eyebrows shielding such irises, bushy and overly thick to the point of hilarity. Stifling a mocking laugh from behind shut lips, the man-in-dress swam towards this interesting fellow, prodding and poking the ever-amusing brows with a bored look on his face. "So… You stuck here too?"
The rodent said nothing, and, other than the slap on the hand rewarded to Lovino for touching him in such a way, made absolutely no acknowledgements of the other man's presence. "Can't you speak? What, not native in Italian or something? Do I need to speak English? Or am I speaking a universal language, here?" No reply. "Heh. Must be a French bastard, then. No other explana-"
And the mouse-man appropriately punched him hard in the face. "Never compare me to a French frog. I am Arthur Kirkland, a rodent of a great ancestry. You will do well to treat me with respect." Leaving the Italian to rub his sorely-scarlet jaw in pain, the English-accented mouse spun around wistfully and swam ahead, avoiding any more confrontations with such a rude man. Calling him a Frenchman… how despicable!
"Jeez, what a jackass… More like a rat than a mouse," Lovino grumbled, wiping the trickle of blood from his puffy lip. His gaze drifted out ahead, following the mouse's movements to try and conclude his next destination. Indeed, wherever he glanced, all that remained in his field of vision was the ever-graying sky above and the ruthless pummels of ocean water.
Guess there's only one way to go… he thought, advancing forward. "And that's forward."
Or, at least, that was where his intended destination was; for it was in that moment of brief confidence that Lovino Vargas collided with a wave from behind and tumbled away, caught within the murderous grasp of the churning rapids.
A/N: Like it? Don't like it? Input, please! Expect another chapter soon, assuming you all review!
UPDATE: For some unknown reason, I haven't been able to upload my documents. I have tried clearing out most of my documents, creating about five different documents on two different programs under different formats, and nothing is working. If anyone out there can help me, then PLEASE do so soon! I had to copy and paste this into one of my already-uploaded documents...