As explained in chapter one, this plotline will not jump into anything. I want Clare and Eli's relationship to 'simmer' a bit before we experience the fireworks.
Later that week, I was lounging in The Dot, an urban coffee shop where most of the Degrassi students would congregate. I was up at the bar sipping a mug of joe when Clare Edwards, or, more accurately, my corporeal nightmare, whisked through the door. She made her way over to a table in the far corner, head down and eyes on her feet. I noticed that she did this a lot. I wasn't sure whether it was an obsession with footwear or unnecessarily low self-esteem. Either way, Clare had a tendency to look at the floor while she was walking.
It was just another thing that intrigued me. Admittedly, I wanted to know why she did this.
Turning in my stool, I positioned myself where I could get a good view of her without being too obvious. She was sitting next to the little Indian girl I had seen her with that first day. She glanced over in my direction for just a moment. Raising a brow, she studied me, tilting her head ever so slightly. Clare's bottom lip was clenched between her teeth and she seemed to be calculating. I found it amusing and wondered if she pondered me half as much as I pondered her. Drawing circles on the countertop with a finger, I tried to keep myself from gazing into those hypnotic eyes. They were distracting- I had caught them once across the crowded lunch yard and they had nearly destroyed me with their intensity. Turning my head, I swallowed hard when I noticed her still staring. That is, until her friend slapped her on the arm and broke the spell.
"Ow!" she groused, rubbing her bicep in displeasure. "What is your problem, Allie?"
"Why don't you just take a picture," the feisty girl said, pulling Clare's phone out of her purse and pointing it at me, "and save yourself the neck pain?"
I bit back a snort. For such a little thing, that girl was a real spitfire.
"Allie!" Clare hissed. "Remember when you asked me to tell you when you were being pushy? Well… YOU. ARE. DOING. IT. RIGHT. NOW!"
I had never heard Clare so snippy. She glanced in my direction, a nervous look on her face. I was surprised by that. Our interaction had been limited these past few days but what little synergy we did have had proven futile. Clare had seemingly overcome her initial embarrassment however, to my displeasure, a new trend had developed. And it confused the hell out of me. Clare had thrown up a wall- a barrier of indifference that frustrated me more than I cared to admit. I had no idea if she was trying to hide an attraction or if she was simply repulsed by me but, whatever it was it was, it was making me nuts. I didn't have a lot of experience with girls so trying to determine why she did certain things was tougher than I imagined.
For instance, she would lift her chin when she saw me. I had no idea why she did this but, she did. It gave her a snobby, knowing look that I didn't much like. Mainly because it reminded me of my father. I felt like she was trying to prove something to me but, what that was, I didn't know. All I did know was that it really bothered me that Clare, my absolute physical ideal, could remind me of someone who had caused so much pain. I considered that maybe she was trying to point out that she was on my level or something. She was a year younger than me, after all...
I shook my head and took a sip of my coffee. It seemed silly that she would care what I think. We hadn't even formally met! Plus, I hadn't thought once about her age. It just hadn't occurred to me. However now that it was on my mind...
Do I care that she's a sophomore?I furrowed my brows and thought about it.
And then I thought about her... About the way the sun would catch her hair, the way she bit her lip in the most adorable way when she was deep in thought, the way she raised her brows in challenge whenever someone toyed with her. Christ, it had been three frickin' days and I was turning into a goddamned stalker!
Rolling my eyes, I blew out a breath. I couldn't care less that she was younger. A year was nothing at all! Besides, Clare was taking grade eleven classes, and advanced ones to boot! I had already figured out that she was brilliant...so why she felt it necessary to prove it was beyond me. Nevertheless, I had taken to keeping my distance. I didn't want to force the girl to be around me if she didn't want to...even though I was dying to be around her. Of course, class made that a little difficult but, we had managed to perfect a routine. I would stroll into English a split second before the bell and Clare would already be seated, lost in whatever book she was reading. I snuck a peek once and spotted a title- Fortnight.
Clare was reading vampire novels.
This surprised the hell out of me. Clare did not seem like the type that would be into something so…dark. I smirked. Although, it did explain any attraction she might have to me.
"Clare, why don't you just go talk to Eli?" Allie said. "You clearly find him…interesting."
As she stressed that last word, I could hear the amusement in her voice. I cuckled inwardly- even though she was a social climber, I was starting to like the little hellion.
"Allie," Clare gritted out. "He is just a boy in my English class! We don't even...talk." She looked down, toying with the silver ring she wore on her finger.
"Well, whose fault is that?" Allie replied. "Besides, I've seen him looking at you, too."
I tried not to all out grimace. Had I been that obvious? I guess I was so used to not being noticed that I had let things get out of hand. I would have to remedy that. Taking one last sip of my coffee, I spun around and hopped off the stool. Scooping my bag off the counter, I strolled towards the entrance to the coffee house, pausing as a human sasquach and his posse lumbered through the door. We side stepped each other, the guy in front giving me a snide look, and I heard one of his friends mutter something about the 'hot, genius sophomore he was always talking about.' I cracked a smile- apparently I wasn't the only one who had noticed Clare.
The next day I was lounging in English class, coloring my finger nails with a sharpie pen. I'd spied a senior girl earlier that day with a handful of black nails- it looked pretty cool so I thought, why the hell not? My dad would hate it and that was all the more reason to do it. Focusing on my manicure, I barely noticed when Dawes dropped my recent assignment on my desk. I glanced at it, smirking at the large, red A that looked back at me.
"Ms. Dawes!" Clare's frantic voice cried out behind me and I swear, every hair on my neck rose as her breath blew across my skin. "There must be some mistake. I've never gotten a C. How did this happen?"
I almost laughed. Clare was grade grubbing! I knew she was uber intelligent but this seemed a bit silly. She couldn't expect life to hand out A's all the time. It just didn't work that way. Sometimes, contrast was necessary- especially for a girl who had never experienced any in her life.
"Well Clare, your earlier assignments were divine but recently your writing has become...distant...impersonal," the teacher explained.
I thought it a perfectly good explanation but Clare seemed to disagree. "I used complex sentence structure and advanced vocabulary!" she countered.
I rolled my eyes. Is she serious? Writing wasn't just about grammar and big words! It was about laying it all out- letting go of your boundaries and throwing caution to the wind. It was pulling material from the deepest part of yourself and letting it flow free, letting it go wild in this thing we call life. One of my favorite writers, Edgar Allen Poe, had put it perfectly: From my childhood hour I have not been as others were, I have not seen as others saw; I could not bring my passions from a common spring, From the same source I have not taken my sorrow, I could not awaken my heart to joy at the same tone; And all I loved, I loved alone. It was self-knowledge and personal passion. Leaking your life onto the page for all to see.
Writing was about taking risks.
"Yes Clare," Ms. Dawes countered. "But your assignment didn't tell me anything about who you are...what you want. You can't hide behind vampire fiction forever."
"I'm not hiding," Clare huffed, her tone laced with defiance.
"Then prove it," the teacher shot back, pointing a finger in my direction, "to your writing partner."
I raised my brows in disbelief. "Me?"
"Yeah you," Ms. Dawes said, tossing a stack of papers on her desk. "You write well but...you're a little wordy. You and Clare will be editing each other's work this semester."
"Great," Clare muttered. "That'll be fun..."
It took everything in me not to all out grin. There was something oddly satisying about the whole situation. Not only had Dawes partnered me with the prettiest girl I'd ever seen, she had also given me direct access to her head. I couldn't wait to see what was going on in there. And, naturally, I looked forward to teasing her once I found out. I may have been taken with Little Miss Innocent but that didn't mean I had any intention of holding back. When I went for something, I went all the way.
"We may have a very secial patnership here people," Dawes added, pointing her pen at us in excitement. "Like Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes!"
"Sylvia Plath killed herself," Clare drawled.
I found her sarcasm entertaining.
The bell rang and everyone jumped out of their seats. I stood up and shoved my stuff into my bag. Clare lingered behind me, hesitating for a moment. She looked at me with thoughtful expression and I wondered if she might actually say something.
She didn't.
With an abrupt turn, Clare made a beeline for the exit, sweeping around the back end of the classroom.
Think you'r getting away that easy, eh? I took the other route and we made it to the door at the same time. She was looking down again, unaware that I was even next to her. Nudging forward, we knocked into each other in the doorway. I smirked down at her and Clare's mouth fell open in outrage. Raising my brows in silent challenge, I watched her narrow her eyes in opposition. Barreling forward, she managed to stay just behind me as we slipped through the opening and I shook my head, amused by her tenacious will.
Clare stopped next to her friend, Alli, and immediately huffed. "He is just so...Argh!"
I was damn smug as I slipped out the fron doors and made my way over to Morty. In fact, I felt a fleeting moment of happiness was in order and it was all because of Clare Edwards. She was beginning to make life interesting and that was new for me. Usually my existence consisted of ducking in and out of school, avoiding my father- not that he was ever home when I was there anyway- and running from a past that refused to leave me alone. But now...now it seemed I had something to look forward to.
As I pulled out of the parking lot, I noticed Clare and the hellion walking down the sidewalk together. A wide smile split my face. This was going to be one hell of a semester.