A/N: So, this turned into three parts. The last part is written but I need to beta it first. You'll thank me later. It will be posted tomorrow.

Until then, I leave you with part. Everything from the last chapter still applies here.

"Speaking"

"Thinking"

/action/

emphasis


Part Two

The bass of a Japanese pop song reverberated throughout his body. (1)

"This DJ definitely knows how to pump up the volume," he thought idly as he looked at the shaggy-haired, bearded man who was currently spinning a record.

Seated at a corner booth, he scanned the dance floor, wondering if his friends had gotten lost in the sea of shimmering bodies.

"I should have known they'd abandon me first chance they got," he muttered to himself as he got up to leave.

"Who's abandoning who?" came a voice from behind him. "Sit your ass down!"

He turned and nodded his head. "Hey, Kiba."

The man in question jumped the two steps up to the actual booth and swung his arm to meet and clasp his friend's hand in mid-air.

"How's it goin' Shikamaru?"

The other man shrugged his shoulders. "Eh, it's going, I guess."

"That's all you have to say?" a voice accompanied with a blonde head shouted at him. "Shikamaru! Where's your enthusiasm?"

"You know, I think I left it at home," he said and leaned forward into the young woman's embrace as she kissed him on the cheek. "How are you, Ino?"

"I'm pretty good. I'd be better, though," she spoke and turned to look at Kiba next to her, "if someone knew how to tell time. You can blame Kiba for us being late."

"Hey! I take offense to that!" he shouted.

"Good." Ino smiled and slid into the booth next to Shikamaru. "So, what did you order us?"

He raised a single eyebrow in response to her question.

Ino laughed, "Kidding! But really, I'm surprised you don't have a drink in your hand or a cigarette by now."

Shikamaru leaned back and snapped. "Why? Do I always have to look like I'm drowning my sorrows in alcohol or nicotine?"

"Umm…" was the only response Ino had to Shikamaru's sudden change in attitude.

Shaking his head as if to clear his mind, Shikamaru asked, "Sorry, just…never mind. Where is everyone?"

"Oh, you know," Ino began quickly and happy fort the change of topic. "Chouji's outside with his girlfriend. I saw him before we found you; he said he'd be up in a few as soon as Ayame's shift starts. Sasuke's somewhere. Probably in the bathroom making sure his eyeliner runs just right. And I'll give you one guess as to where Haku is."

Shikamaru looked Ino in the eyes and they both smiled.

"The bar." They answered at the same time and then turned toward the place just mentioned.

Sure enough, at the far corner of the bar was Haku. They had met him two years ago when they first came to Smashing Blue. Aside from dancing, drinking, and generally having a good time with friends, Haku's agenda for clubbing always included the same thing: hit on the bartender.

Currently, he was whispering something to the bartender, and judging simply by what he was wearing, Shikamaru was fairly sure he could guess what it was.

The young man, who looked younger than Shikamaru and Ino but was in fact three years their senior, had on very tight jeans with several holes in them stylistically and strategically placed, of course. The short-sleeved button-up shirt that was half undone was also a size too small and rode up enough to expose a few inches of skin as Haku leaned across the bar. Shikamaru couldn't see his face because Haku had let his hair down, but he was 99% certain that if he could, that Haku's expression would read something like: "Throw me down on the bar right now and take me you delectable Grecian god."

Even Ino sitting next to him was less slutty in her appearance and she was wearing a silver halter-top with a black miniskirt and three-inch heels. Compared to Haku, Ino was a saint.

"You'd think he'd learn by now," Shikamaru commented absently.

"He never will," Kiba pointed out. "Once he sets his mind on something or in this case, someone, he has to have it."

"I still say it's Haku that Britney is talking about in that song, (2)" Ino said and nodded her head. "He's addicted to this guy and going crazy because he can't have him."

Shikamaru snorted. "Look, here he comes."

They watched as their friend made his way over to the booth and gathered more attention than he had gotten from the bartender.

Haku slid in beside Ino leaving Kiba the lone chair occupier. He gave the girl a quick hug and said, "What's up guys? You having a good time?"

"Not much," Ino put in. "Seems like you were, though." She winked for good measure.

Haku sighed and stared longingly at the bar. "I wish. One day. One day he's going to crack. I know it."

Kiba scoffed. "Yeah, the day you walk up to the bar naked and ask him to suck—"

"Anyway!" Shikamaru interrupted. He really didn't want to break up the fistfight that would have ensued had Kiba finished that sentence. "Did you happen to put in a drink order?"

Haku put his hand to his chest. "Just who do you think I am? Of course I did! I ordered everyone's usual. Chouji and Sasuke better show up, too, because I don't like paying for people. Especially people who don't pay me back." He looked pointedly at Kiba when he said this last statement but the other man simply shrugged his shoulders and mouthed "What?".

"Aw, thanks sweetie!" Ino said. "Thank goodness you're here to bring some life to the table."

"Hey!" shouted Kiba and Shikamaru at the same time.

"I try my best," Haku smiled back and raised his eyebrows.

"And yet, you haven't succeeded once in two years," Shikamaru stated dryly.

Kiba let out a low whistle while Haku got up from the booth.

"I forgot to order something for myself. I'll be right back," he said and left.

"Ouch! Shikamaru. That's low, even for you. What's up with you?" Ino asked, slightly abhorred at her friend's insult. "You're not acting like yourself tonight."

"Yes, because we all have to act the same all the time," came a new voice as a person approached their booth.

A young man dressed entirely in black, including the gelled hair and eyeliner that shadowed his eyes sat down in the chair opposite Shikamaru.

"To be abnormal in such a normal world is just wrong." The new person smiled wide.

Ino raised an eyebrow at him. "Funny Sasuke. We all know how you like to break society's rules."

"'Sup man?" Kiba gave Sasuke a high five. "Where've you been?"

"Had to make a phone call," he pulled a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. "Took longer than I expected."

"I can't believe what I'm hearing!" shouted Kiba. "Goth-boy's got a girlfriend!" He smacked Sasuke on his back, which caused him to almost choke on his cigarette.

Coughing, Sasuke turned to Kiba and shoved his him backward in his chair. Kiba was able to just catch himself from falling onto the floor.

"It was my mother, dogbreath. Watch what you say."

Laughing it off, Kiba right himself and leaned on the table. "Sure, sure."

"Dogbreath," Ino mused. "That's not half bad."

"Hey!" Kiba scrunched his face and pouted.

Ino reached across the table and held his hand. "I only meant that is sounds endearing. Dogbreath. It suits you."

"You would know," muttered Shikamaru.

"God Shikamaru! What is with you?" Ino half-shouted while Sasuke and Kiba rolled their eyes.

Shikamaru shook his head, not wanting to get into this conversation with Ino. Instead, he let his eyes ghost over the crowd until the combination of blue hair and determined eyes caught his attention.

"Look," he nodded his head toward the entrance. "Newbies."

"He's right," Sasuke said having glanced over his shoulder. "I've never seen them before."

"Pink-hair's not new," said Kiba. "I'd remember that sweet ass anywhere. Oh yeah." He grinned and nodded his head until there was an audible /smack/ .

Ino glared at Kiba even after he said "Sorry."

She "hmphed" and turned away from him to look at the newcomers.

"That's Sakura," Ino said. "The one with the sweet ass that Kiba likes." She smacked him again, but Kiba knew not to say anything.

"We went to grade school together," Ino said flippantly before her eyes went wide.

"That bitch!" she slammed her hands on the table. "She stole my outfit!"

"Here we go," Kiba muttered and scooted out of Ino's range so she couldn't hit him again.

"No, she really didn't," said Shikamaru.

"What makes you a fashion critic all of a sudden? Do you want me to comment on what you're wearing?" She crossed her arms, daring him to say more.

He smirked. "Go ahead."

"C'mon Ino, you won't win," Sasuke started and puffed on his cigarette. "Besides, Shikamaru has dressed more strangely than this before. I thought you'd be used to it by now. I am and I'm a freakin' guy! Besides, he's right. Aside from the black skirts, you and what's her name are wearing different outfits. Deal with it."

"So why do you hate Sakura so much?" asked Shikamaru, changing the topic.

Ino shook her head. "Ever since she hit puberty, all the boys fawned over her. She even had not one, but two stalkers in high school."

"Oh, I see," Sasuke started, "You don't hate her, you envy her."

"I do not!" Ino scoffed. "I would not have wanted to be stalked by the guys who were after her is disturbing. Being followed around by Superbrows and the Loudmouth all day? I don't think so."

"So, is one of her stalkers still after now?" Shikamaru asked as Sasuke gave him a strange look.

"Nope," Ino looked to where Sakura and her friends had settled at a table. "I've seen the blonde guy and the other girl here before, but the other guy is new. Maybe he's her current stalker. I wouldn't be surprised…."

"Here we are lady and gentlemen," said Haku bearing a loaded tray. "Drinks all around!"

"It's about time," muttered Kiba as he took his and Ino's drinks.

"Bottoms up everyone!" Ino smiled and took a nice swig of her drink. Everyone else followed suit seconding the sentiment.

"Cheers," Shikamaru mumbled as he continued to watch a group of friends that were not his own across the room.

* * *

"Welcome to Smashing Blue, Neji. Best club in the city." Sakura turned around and beamed at him. "C'mon. We better snag a table before they're all taken."

Neji focused on the bouncing pink head in front of him, just slightly wary of his surroundings. Yes, he knew the definition of a club meant dizzying lights, pounding music, and dancing bodies, but he didn't think there'd be this many people.

Neji followed Sakura and navigated carefully through the swarming bodies. He couldn't help but notice that everyone exhibited their own unique style. There were so many colors and patterns that it made his eyes dizzy. Or maybe that was just the strobe light?

Either way, Neji did notice that while he was silently observing people, they were also looking at him. Once he saw that someone was looking at him ("They're probably laughing mentally at my hair," he thought) he ignored them and moved on, not wanting to accidentally agree to some proposition based solely on eye, face, and head gestures.

Although, he had to admit, some of the people there were nice to look at.

"Especially the one in the corner booth, over there. He's too far in the shadows, though, I can't make ou—look away. He's looking over, so look away," he thought and turned his eyes to the pink head in front of him.

The four friends sat down at what looked to be the last empty table. Tenten and Kankuro sitting next to each and continuing to bicker while Sakura and Neji sat across from them.

"So, what do you think?" Sakura turned to Neji, propping her head on her hand.

"It's…," Neji finally looked around the club as a whole, "very bright."

"Bright? That's it?" Sakura scoffed.

Tenten joined in the conversation. "Let it sink in for him, Sakura. This is a big step for our little Neji!"

Kankuro guffawed while Neji glared at Tenten.

"I have never been to a club before. I have nothing to compare it to, so I am taking my time in assessing it."

"Well, while you assess, I'm going to get some drinks. Any requests?" asked Tenten.

"Just get the usual," Sakura replied. Kankuro nodded in agreement and Tenten left for the bar.

"So, did you tell him?" Kankuro asked, a smirk on his face.

"Tell me what?" asked Neji looking between the two of them.

Sakura looked at him.

"Just a word of warning," she said pleasantly.

"What? Only one?" Neji asked lightly, thinking it was a joke.

Sakura shook her head. "Don't use the restroom. If you have to go, find Tenten or me and we'll show you to the all-night coffee shop a few doors down."

Neji furrowed his eyebrows, confused. "Why not?

"Trust her," Kankuro said. " You don't want to know why."

"Great. My first clubbing experience is starting off so well."

"It would be awesome, Neji, if you'd just let it," Sakura put her hand on his shoulder. "You're too uptight. You need to loosen up!"

"Who knows," Kankuro interrupted, "Depending on how loose Hyuuga gets, he might even get laid. God knows, he needs it."

"I will dump this drink on your head, Kankuro. Leave him alone or else do you want me to share the story of your first time in a club?" asked Tenten as she handed out drinks.

Kankuro glared. "You wouldn't."

"Oh, I would." Tenten smiled deviously.

He turned away from her and back to Neji. "Okay, Hyuuga, listen up. Avoid the restroom at all costs. Especially the women's restroom."

"What are you—" Neji began before Kankuro continued.

"The owner of this place, well, he's a little eccentric."

"A pervert is more like it," Sakura muttered as she took a drink.

"He likes snapping pictures of people in…intimate situations, shall we say?" Kankuro looked to Tenten who nodded her head.

"You have to be joking." Neji said.

"Wish I was," Kankuro said, shaking his head. "The facts are these(3): Jiraiya is the biggest perv in this town. Bigger than me and that's saying something. So, watch out for the restrooms. It's a club so people go in there to do more than just you know what, which is why you'll also see the flash of camera and hear screams in there, too. It's Jiraiya's method of making sure no one dirties up his club too much and also his source material for the pornos he writes.

"So," he continued, "If you do hook up, avoid the restroom and a tall guy with long, bushy white hair. My suggestion would be to use the hallway behind the DJ booth. It's hidden from view and not too many people go there because they think it'll be too loud but it's probably the quietest place in here."

"I'll keep that in mind," Neji deadpanned. It was difficult to tell if he was being sarcastic or genuinely taking Kankuro's advice.

"The DJ! Thanks for reminding me Kankuro!" Sakura told him.

Kankuro looked puzzled but replied, "No problem?"

Sakura took Neji's chin in her hand and turned him toward the DJ before saying,

"You are currently listening to the amazing musical craft of Audio Jesus."

"I can see where he gets the name," he said as he took in the sight of a man in his mid-thirties with shaggy brown hair and a scraggily beard who sported aviator sunglasses while bobbing his head in time with the music.

"He has the uncanny ability to turn classics into contemporary techno so good, you'll have an orgasm while you're dancing to them," Tenten explained.

Kankuro smirked. "Care to prove to that theory?"

/slap/

"What the—" Kankuro started as he was slapped in the back of the head.

"What was that, honey?" A tall young woman with long red hair, glasses, and what looked like a rather revealing trenchcoat-turned-dress asked.

"Heh heh, nothing Karin! Babe. Darling?" Kankuro attempted, unsure.

Karin smiled wickedly and Neji silently reminded himself not to get on this woman's bad side.

She then sat down on Kankuro's lap and faced the group.

"So who are you?" she asked Neji.

"Neji Hyuuga. And you?" he replied impassively.

"I'm Karin, Kanky-kun's girlfriend," she said, giving he boyfriend a pat on the head.

"It's a pleasure."

Karin's mouth opened wide. "Look at that! A man with manners. You could learn from this Kanky-kun."

Kankuro just blinked.

"You girls waiting for anyone else?" asked Karin, "Or can I steal my guy away from you?"

"Please," Tenten said, "Take him. I'm just waiting on Temari and then we're hitting the dance floor."

"Okay, have fun! Nice meeting you Neji!" Karin said and pulled Kankuro up from the seat by the front of his shirt. "As for you, we've got some unfinished business."(4)

"Hell yeah," Kankuro said and let himself be pulled away by Karin.

Neji blinked. "Are they always like that?"

"Pretty much," Sakura and Tenten said at the same time.

"Tenten! Sakura!" Neji saw a woman a few years older than himself yelling from across the room.

"Hey hun!" Tenten waved back. She stood and hugged and kissed the other woman when she arrived.

Taking her hand and sitting down, Tenten said, "Neji, this is my girlfriend, Temari. Also, Kankuro's older sister."

"If you want blackmail material on my brother, now is the time to ask," the blonde woman said smirking.

Neji liked her already.

"It's nice to meet you."

"So, I hear this is your first time here at the Blue?" Temari asked, taking a sip of Tenten's drink.

"Yes, it is."

"Have been up to the bar yet?" Temari asked, her eyes gleaming.

Tenten answered for Neji. "I got the drinks. Sakura and I wanted to ease Neji into things a little at a time. And don't worry, your brother already told him about Jiraiya."

"Damn." Temari snapped her fingers.

"What is so special about the bar," Neji asked.

Sakura leaned over so she wouldn't have to shout over the music.

"The bar has just about everything. Including the craziest bartender you'll ever meet."

Neji looked skeptical, but Temari brushed off Sakura's words.

"Don't worry. There's nothing to be afraid of. Z-man's really cool even though he looks scary and menacing." Tenten and Temari giggled.

"That's an understatement," Neji said upon getting a good look at the barkeep. The man looked more like bouncer than a bartender with a grey tank-top exposing several tattoos up and down his arms. And was that a scarf wrapped around his face? Weird…

"He's been here forever," Sakura added. "No makes a Hello Kitty(5) like he does."

Neji quirked an eyebrow. "A what?"

"A Hello Kitty," Temari explained. "It's the club's signature drink. You should try it. It's fan-fucking-tastic."

"I'll keep that in mind," Neji said.

"What do you say, baby," Temari turned to Tenten. "You up for some dancing?"

"Thought you'd never ask." Tenten smiled and downed her drink. "See you later!"

Temari winked and waved and followed Tenten to the dance floor.

Sakura leaned her head on Neji's shoulder. "How you doin'?"

Neji gave a small laugh. "Apparently, I am doing better than you are at the moment."

Sakura straightened up. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, nothing at all." Neji then asked, "How many drinks haveyou had again?"

Sakura's jaw dropped open. "You think I'm sloshed!"

"Well, if you aren't after two drinks, then Tenten certainly is after three." Neji said and inclined his head to middle of the club.

There, Tenten and Temari were dancing and lip synching to the current song. Tenten was very into it.

"You look so fine that I really wanna make you mine" sang Tenten along with the band.

She stopped and eyed Temari up and down, mouthing, "Big. Black. Boots."

Keeping in time with the song, Temari lip-synched, "Looong, brown hair." At the same time Tenten removed the clips that held her buns and let loose her own long, brown hair before pulling Temari close and kissing her soundly.

Appropriately, they pulled apart just as the band sang, "Are you gonna be my girl?"

"Yup," Sakura said. "Tenten's gone. You didn't know she was a dancing drunk, did you?"

"Gee," Neji mocked, "I never would have guessed."

Sakura laughed and punched him lightly in the shoulder. "You wanna join them?"

His eyes widened. "You can not be serious."

"C'mon Neji," Sakura pleaded. "Let go and rock your body!"

"Please say you did not just say that."

"You know you want to," Sakura continued, "This is what clubbing is all about. Forget your paper and your worries and just…dance. That's all you have to do."

Neji eyed her warily.

"You'd make your best friend very happy…" she said and looked to where Tenten and Temari were now dancing to a French pop song(6).

Night sighed and gave up. "Fine."

Sakura clenched her fists. "Yes! I'll be with you the whole time, so you won't be alone. But trust me, your first time on the floor is a once in a lifetime experience, it's that exhilarating."

"If you so say," Neji said, still unconvinced but willing to give it a try if not for Sakura's sake, then to prove to himself that maybe a little change might not be that bad.

He hoped.

* * *

Haku had come and gone with the third round of drinks. He was currently back at the bar with a new plan of attack thanks to a sarcastic remark from Sasuke but one which Haku thought made a lot of sense. Chouji had shown up but couldn't bear to be away from his girl when she was still in the same room as him, so he went to sit at the bar and chat with her between orders. Meanwhile, Ino had dragged Kiba off to the sweaty mass of convulsing bodies by saying, "Come on dogbreath, let's dance," which left Shikamaru and Sasuke alone at the table with their drinks.

"Don't you ever get tired of it?" Shikamaru asked a Russian song changed the tempo.(7) Finally.

"I get tired of a lot of things. Be more specific," Sasuke stated matter-of-factly.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "You know? Dancing. Drinking. Clubbing. All of it?"

Sasuke quirked an eyebrow.

"Don't get me wrong," Shikamaru started with a slight air of defensive about him. "I like hanging out with everyone. The more I go out with the group, the less Ino nags me, which is always nice."

"Yes," Sasuke continued, "But even when we're here, you and I usually end up sitting up here and drinking and mocking the others as they get drunk off their asses."

"That's just it," Shikamaru said and turned to look at Sasuke. "We do the same thing every weekend. A little variety would be nice every once and a while."

"Let me get this straight," Sasuke began. "You, Shikamaru Nara, are actually suggesting trying something new?" He sat back.

"Well, that's a first. I thought you liked—oh, I get it." Sasuke smirked.

It was Shikamaru's turn to look confused. "What is there to get?"

"You, that's what. It's not about wanting to do something new. You don't want to change things up." Sasuke put his forearms on the table and leaned closer.

"You're tired of sitting back and watching how happy your friends are out on the dance floor whether they're with people they know or with perfect strangers. Because here you sit, too apathetic to go out there and get what you want so now you're sulking because of it and making excuses." Sasuke nodded once in to emphasize his point.

"Excuse me?"

Sasuke sat back and took a swig of his drink. "When was the last time you went out on the floor and danced with Ino, Kiba, and Haku?"

"What does it matter?" Shikamaru replied but avoided Sasuke's eyes by gesturing flippantly.

"When was the last time you went out there and danced with anyone?"

Shikamaru scanned the crowd. "Kiba should not be allowed on the dance floor. Not with the idiotic moves he's making."

"You're avoiding the question." Sasuke smiled.

"So? You're asking the wrong question."

"When's the last time you had a date?"

Shikamaru's eyes shot back at Sasuke who smirked in response.

"Face it. You're lonely."

Shikamaru brushed off the comment. "What about you? You just described yourself you know."

"I am far from lonely," answered Sasuke. "My partner lives two hours from here. Why do you think I always meet you guys here every two weeks instead of each week?"

Shikamaru processed the information quickly and realized what Sasuke was saying was true.

He continued, "I keep you company, Shikamaru, because I would rather help a friend have a good time by having a nice conversation and be faithful to my partner instead of getting drunk and acting like a fool. Look at Kiba."

Shikamaru didn't have to look, he had already seen Kiba's atrocious dancing and needed no reminding of it.

"Case in point. I don't care if I was left alone up here because I have someone waiting for me, but I didn't want to leave you by yourself. I know what that's like. It's no fun," Sasuke finished.

Shikamaru hmphed.

"I guess I should say thank you, then."

"This is going to sound especially cheesy coming from me but," Sasuke went on, "it's what friends do. Now, get out there and find yourself a one-night stand so I can nurse my drink in peace."

Shikamaru furrowed his brow. "That's not exactly what I'm looking for."

"Oh? So you are looking?" Sasuke asked, a smug look on his face.

The other rolled his eyes. "You think I've just been chilling and talking to you all this time? I do silently scout the crowd from time to time."

"I underestimated you, Nara," Sasuke quipped.

"Thanks," Shikamaru deadpanned then leaned back in his seat. "But seriously, I would like to find someone who's actually worth my time. One-night stand or more, it's me who'd be putting in the effort and I want to get something out of it. More would be nice, but in a place like this, I won't get my hopes up."

Sasuke shrugged his shoulders. "You never know."

"Ha!" laughed Shikamaru. "Do you know how low the probability is that I would actually find someone in this crowd who's intellectually appealing and equally stimulating?"

"What?" asked Sasuke. "Looks don't matter?"

"Eh, they're a bonus, but they're not what I care about. I would rather be able to hold a compelling conversation with a person and have them challenge me than sleep with the first person that throws themselves at my feet but can't remember their own name in the morning."

"Okay," Sasuke looked out at the crowd and pointed. "How about him? The one who's attempting to dance."

Shikamaru saw the young man Sasuke was pointing at. "He looks like a prey who's been caught in the jaws of the predator. He's hiding it well, though. His friends aren't really noticing."

"So, already, you know that he don't want to let his guard down and since he's not partaking of the club atmosphere as much as everyone else, you can bet he's not drunk. Or at least, he's smart enough not to become a robot dancer like everyone does once the music gets going."

"Okay, I'll admit, he caught my eye when he first came in. One look and I knew he wasn't a usual clubber. Other than that, it's hard to tell what exactly he's thinking…." Shikamrau trailed off, thinking to himself.

/Smirk/

"I knew it," Sasuke said. "You've been ogling him all night. Admit it."

Shikamaru turned to look at his friend, his eyes narrowing in concern over how much his friend thought he knew.

"I noticed that you had your eye on him. You even went back to search the crowd for him a few times already tonight. Making sure he didn't leave before you took your chance, hm?"

Shikamaru turned away from Sasuke. "Maybe. Good reconnaissance should help a mission succeed, right?"

Sasuke shook his head in mock disbelief. "Well, what are you waiting for? Go out there and tap that before someone steals your chance."

Shikamaru blinked. "Careful Uchiha. Prolonged exposure to Kiba has proven you're likely to lose countless brain cells as well as your sanity."

"Careful Nara," Sasuke shot back. "Someone's about to make a move on your man."

Unconsciously, Shikamaru turned and scanned the crowd. He exhaled a breath he did not know he had been holding upon seeing this opportunity still waiting for him.

"Asshole."

"Dickhead."

Shikamaru got up from his seat and was about the leave his annoyingly astute friend when he turned around.

"So, will we ever get to meet her? Him?"

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Maybe. I have to give Kiba a heart-to-heart first so he knows to keep his mouth shut. One word, good or bad, out of his mouth and I will kick his ass."

Shikamaru nodded and started off again while Sasuke laughed quietly to himself.

"Lazy bastard," Sasuke muttered but smiled to himself.

He hoped that the chance his friend was taking would work out, and if not, Sasuke was fairly sure he would at least be amused with the scene that was about to occur.

Footnotes:

1- "Sparkle" by Ayumi Hamasaki

2- Reference to Britney Spears' "Toxic"

3- Reference to the wonderful tv series Pushing Daises.

4- Cue "Business Time" by Flight of the Conchords

5- Hello Kitty is a drink I made up for this fic unless it actually exists in which case I don't own it.

6- "Nonchalant" by Chapeaumelon

7- "Ya Soshla S Uma" by t.A.T.u.