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Chapter 2: The Mighty Chicken Man

"Hurry up Rodney!" hissed Sheppard.

"Oh will you relax." Grumbled McKay "It's not like he's got the slightest clue about what's going on so chill."

"Yeah, well, hurry up anyway."

"Fine." They fell silent; the only sound was the clacking of the keyboard as the scientist manipulated the video tape on the computer. Several minutes later he announced triumphantly "Ah-ha! There you go, all done." He crowed, smug smile firmly in place.

Sheppard grinned in anticipation "Let's see it then." He smirked, all but rubbing his hands together in evil glee. Rodney hit the play button and an image of Ronon doing 'the chicken wing' popped up on the screen. Rodney watched him with a proud smile. Sure it was amusing the first time he'd seen it but now, with it zoomed, enhanced, being played in slowmo, and complete with subtitles that read "Fear me! I am The Mighty Chicken Man!" it was absolutely priceless.

Both Sheppard and Rodney collapsed in helpless laughter as they watched it. "Oh god," gasped the Colonel "that turned out better then I ever hoped!"

Rodney scowled at him "Of course it did. It's not like someone of your limited intelligence could possibly comprehend the way a genius such as myself can take something as simple as video feed – rather poorly done by the way, do you have rheumatism or something? – and turn it into a masterpiece such as this."

"Yeah sure, whatever Rodney" Sheppard drawled "Just send it will you?"

Grinning so widely it was a wonder his face didn't split in two Rodney said "Sending this wonderful little bundle of joy to everyone in Atlantis in T-minus 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…now!"

With that final send off Dr. Meredith Rodney McKay clicked the button that would send the fateful document to every last person on the lost city of Atlantis.

Staring at the screen for a few seconds Sheppard gave a resigned sigh and turned to look at his partner in crime. "Enjoy the last few days of your life Rodney. As soon as Ronon finds out what we did we are so dead."

"Yeah well it's gonna take awhile for him to figure it out and when he does he's only gonna kill you because you're the one who recorded it and there's nothing to implicate me."

"We're sending this from your email address McKay." The Colonel reminded him.

"Oh…right." Said Rodney looking worried for a moment before shrugging it off "It's not like anyone is gonna just walk up to him and say 'hey did you see that video of you making a complete fool out of yourself?' I mean, come on, who would be stupid enough to let him know about it and plus it's not like anybody's gonna forward it to him either -which is the only way he'd be able to trace it back to me - because that wou…" Rodney suddenly froze with a look of absolute horror on his face. "Oh no."

"'Oh no' what?" asked Sheppard with a look on his face that said he wasn't sure if he wanted to know.

Rodney didn't answer him immediately as he quickly pulled up something on his computer. He fell back into his chair blanching whiter than a ghost. "We are way beyond screwed."

"What!?" asked Sheppard beginning to get annoyed at the lack of response.

"We sent it to Ronon." Rodney answered tonelessly.

Sheppard froze for a full minute before croaking out a strangled "What?"

"That email" said McKay pointing to the computer screen "was sent to one Specialist Ronon Dex."

The Colonel dragged his gaze from McKay to the laptop sitting on the desk. "Please tell me this is your idea of a cruel joke?"

"I wish it was." The scientist suddenly sat up in a panic "Now he's gonna know who helped you do it!! He's gonna KILL ME!! This is all your fault Colonel! I plead innocent! He can't kill me this expedition needs my experience and-"

"Will you relax McKay?" snapped Sheppard not sounding at all relaxed himself. "We'll figure something out."

"Like WHAT!!?" shrieked Rodney.

Sheppard thought for a minute "Umm… maybe we should tell Beckett to have a medical team standing by."

Rodney groaned and dropped his head into his hands. "We're doomed." He moaned.

Ronon walked into his room feeling pretty good. He'd just had two trays of food and managed to snag the last cup of Jell-O from one of the marines. Now he was going to sit back, relax and play that new game Sheppard had introduced him to; Halo.

He booted up his laptop and saw that he had a new email. Deciding Halo could wait a few minutes he opened it up and downloaded the attachment. Once it flashed that the file was ready he hit the play button.

When he saw exactly what it was that had been sent out he growled. The growl that said someone is going to die and he was going to enjoy it immensely. Quickly checking to see who had sent it he discovered it had been McKay.

So McKay and Sheppard thought they could pull one over on him did they? HA! They'd pay for this. Although he had to give Sheppard credit, he was a heck of a good actor when he wanted to be.

He was still gonna kill him though.

With a smirk he stalked out his door, Halo abandoned for the moment, he was a man on a mission. He hoped Sheppard and McKay hadn't made any plans for the future because they would be regrettably unable to keep them.

TBC

Will Sheppard and McKay survive? Tune in next time to find out (but don't hold your breath).