A/N: An AU collection of childhood memories starring the wonderful Ryoko and Kyon. What life would've been like if icing stickers and a sandbox were all that it took to make these two six-year-olds fall in love.

Growing Pains

II - Middle School

Middle school wasn't supposed to be easy. I can admit to that.

Remember the day your sister first called you Kyon? It was so hilarious I almost fell out of my seat. You tried to tell us to knock it off, but nicknames are cute, you know? You were embarrassed but still you were patient, lenient of the way I loved to tease you in that way only best friends can. Sure, we were dysfunctional and strange, but… wasn't that friendship?

When most of the boys realised they weren't going to be handsome in this lifetime they converted into comics instead, playing the fool and mucking around, wasting away their school days like they didn't matter. You weren't like that. You watched them, almost with a longing in your eyes, before turning your chair around to eat your lunch at my desk with a smile on your face.

The day you made friends with Kunikida and Sasaki made my insides twist. Was this my first real jealousy? I couldn't be sure.

The way you laughed with them… wasn't that how you laughed with me? It made me sad to think you'd start spending time with other people, so I found my own friends. I befriended a group of girls who would joke about what they'd watched on television the night before while pouring over gossip magazines and applying nail varnish while our teacher was facing the other way. It wasn't perfect, but I learned how to fit in with them, became a proper 'girly' girl. All the while you and Kunikida and Sasaki continued to have heated debates and bizarre conversations outside the broadcasting room and in the school cafeteria, while I stood on the outside and ceased to exist in this new world of yours. I felt like an alien in my own territory.

Do you remember that time when it was White Day?

We were in our first year and you were hanging around by the shoe lockers. Three boys had given me traditional white chocolates and I was startled by the fact that people actually knew who I was… and then I saw you, stood over in the corner with something in your hands. A little box, messily wrapped but easily the sweetest present there.

They stared at you, giving you a warning look, before kicking up their shoes and leaving with laughter on their faces. You relaxed once they were gone but your face was that familiar red colour and you seemed glued to the spot. So I became bold, moved closer to you and prised the box from your fingertips.

Dear Ryoko, read the note. Happy White Day.

I took it from you and unwrapped it, lifting the lid to see what was inside. A slab of milk chocolate with hazelnuts and a Tom and Jerry icing sticker was sat peacefully inside on a bed of kitchen roll.

You never were one for traditional gifts, were you?

"Um… This isn't… I mean, if you don't want it… I, I under… stand… um…" Your composure was melting away and you'd gradually dissolved into a stammering thirteen-year-old boy stumbling and fumbling for the right words to say.

So I leaned forward and kissed the little box I was cupping in my hands.

"That was really nice of you, Kyon. Go figure you of all people would know I hate white chocolate."

You said nothing, but your ears began to turn red and you plucked the icing sticker off of the top and popped it into your mouth without another word. I like to think that the reason we kept buying those was for means of forgiveness or understanding.

And what happened when we went to our first festival without our parents' company? Kunikida and Sasaki went with us too, but for once I didn't mind because you were still there. You told me I looked nice in my yukata and my cheeks felt warm as I tried to cool them down with my hands. I'd picked out a pale blue yukata because you'd once told me that blue was the colour I looked best in. I wasn't a pink girl anymore. That'd be too good to be true.

Sasaki looked pretty too. She was the one wearing pink, not me, with a little flower in her hair that made her elegance stand out. Even if she didn't act much like a girl a lot of the time it didn't stop her from looking like one, much to my annoyance.

Kunikida looked okay, but whatever. You looked the best.

We all went to scoop goldfish together and my anger seeped through when I was the only one who didn't catch one. Kunikida gave me his instead. You teased him, saying that he liked me. I tried not to notice when his face flushed and yours twisted with an emotion I couldn't place.

If you were so afraid of such a silly thing being confirmed, why did you say anything in the first place? Honestly. Sometimes you could be such a child.

When the Christmas talent show came up the girls in my class performed a dance on stage. Sasaki had conveniently developed period cramps before we were due to go on stage and sat beside Kunikida and yourself on the small plastic chairs, telling you something and laughing. Yet, when I appeared on stage, you suddenly fell silent, watching me with an intensity that left me feeling completely bewildered. When the audience applauded, I could hear the rhythm of your hands better than anybody's.

Afterwards the three of you came backstage to offer your praise. Kunikida told me I looked pretty and I took it just about as badly as somebody can, blushing and fiddling with the ends of my hair while stumbling on words. It didn't mean anything, I swear, but - well, nobody had ever called me pretty before, unless you count that one time when we were seven and you told me that my sunflower costume I wore for the class assembly made me look like a flower fairy.

Despite my protests, you still seemed a bit stingy after my response. Sasaki politely told me the dance went well, before following you as you left the stage abruptly. Afterwards I waited for you by the shoe lockers, but you never passed through.

Nonetheless we somehow managed to spend the 28th of December together, the four of us, having a late Christmas party and exchanging gifts. You gave me a notebook with a 'Merry Christmas' message written on the front page in your untidy handwriting. It made my heart swell with a happiness I could only seem to identify with… well, merriment. The four of us laughed and talked and danced the night away, feeling blessed with good fortune and a fresh start.

It made me so happy.

New years was a lot more bittersweet, visiting the shrines with my family in a small white kimono. I spotted you there but it was your little sister who came running up to hug me, not you. You went over and conversed with Sasaki's family.

I pretended not to care, ruffling your younger sister's hair and telling her she'd have good luck if she kept smiling.

Somewhere around that time you stayed off school due to the seasonal flu. I wasn't used to school life without you, and it seemed Kunikida and Sasaki weren't either, so I took it upon myself to make sure life was still as normal as possible. You'd called me over the phone to tell me you didn't need taking care of but that it was very contagious, so there really wasn't anything I could do except drop by once a week and give your mother some hotpot, from my family to yours.

It was in those few weeks you were off school that something happened: Kunikida gave me a love letter.

I hadn't noticed it nestled peacefully in my locker at first, but when I pulled out my shoes, there it was. I stared in shock as the small letter fell onto the floor and slid underneath the bench. As I bent down to pick it up I caught him watching from the corner of my eye, but when I looked up properly he'd slipped away.

Ryoko, I know I haven't known you very long, but I've never met anyone like you…

You're really pretty and I like you…

I'm sorry this is so sudden but to tell you the truth I've felt this way for a while now…

Ever since the first year…

Sorry I'm being so abrupt…

The sentences jumbled together as I stared at the page until it blurred. The warning bell erupted and I hurriedly slipped the small letter into my bag, tugging on my shoes and heading towards our homeroom.

I tried to talk to him the whole day but he was avoiding me like the plague, refusing to make eye contact during lessons and escaping the classroom at lunch time. When I eventually realised he'd holed himself up in the broadcasting room it was too late; he'd locked himself in the soundproof room where my voice wouldn't be able to reach him.

In that time, I found myself sitting with Sasaki at lunch, stabbing at my squid sausages without much enthusiasm. She eyed me warily, staying silent as she watched me eat.

Eventually, I spoke up.

And I asked her why. Why she could talk so freely to them but not to me. When it came to me, there was suddenly nothing to talk about at all. All the while she watched me with a look in her eyes I couldn't fully shrugged. "Because you've never said anything interesting to me, I suppose." Sasaki glanced up at me sharply. "Besides, it seems like despite our friends' efforts to get us talking, you avoid acknowledging me when you can, so I didn't feel it was worth trying."

"I don't pretend like you're not here. You just don't like me."

"Is that so?"

Sasaki often spoke like that, twisting her own words so it seemed like she was questioning mine. It was odd and quirky and really difficult to understand at times why she talked that way, but when I realised I wasn't going to progress with her at all if I kept trying to slight her. In the end I gave into that weird way of speaking and allowed myself to just listen instead. It seemed to do the trick.

"If you keep at it this way, we might even be on good terms soon enough," she said at the end of lunch break with a rare smile she'd failed to show me before.

When the end of the day came I hid behind the shoe lockers until Kunikida eventually came out of hiding, where I pounced on him.

I tugged onto his sleeves as he glanced around, red-faced, trying to run away, and I asked him what the hell brought it on. How could he have thought that was a good idea, to hurl his feelings at me with no warning and then not want to talk about it? Was it fair of him at all to do that to me? To face his fears for a moment and run from them the second I realised?

He apologised and looked down, fiddling with his tie awkwardly. For a moment I considered pleading for us to go back to the way things were before… and then I remembered new years, when you walked over to Sasaki first and pretended I wasn't there.

I turned to him, with your face in my mind as I told him, "Then let's be boyfriend and girlfriend."

He turned every shade of red imaginable. I don't think he ever expected me to take him seriously, so this was development in itself. And yet, walking back with our hands clasping awkwardly, I suddenly felt like what I was doing was worse than what you did first.

Nonetheless, it would be cruel to let him down straight away, so I kept up the act, allowed him to take me to cafes and libraries, allowed him to hold my hand and hug me, allowed him to crush on me as I pretended to return the favour. And I felt awful the entire time.

My first kiss was to a boy I didn't love, yet one who loved me so much he seemed almost devoted. I think we clung to each other because neither of us had dated anybody else before, so we had no idea how to act.

It was by my shoe locker and had taken me by surprise; I'd pulled out my shoes and turned around to find a spot on the bench, only to find his lips crumpling up against mine, soft and light, yet quivering. Our first kiss was filled with fumbling nerves and misguided attraction, yet now something I look back upon fondly. Even if I hadn't ever liked Kunikida the way he liked me, it seemed inevitable that I would treasure that moment, for nostalgia alone.

He will always be my friend, no matter how our feelings for each other may have clashed in middle school.

However, when you came back to school and found us like this, a bundle of carefully fixed dates and false flirting, you seemed crushed. At the time I wondered how you could feel that way when you had Sasaki, how you never seemed to notice me when she was around anymore… and it really hurt.

I began to notice whenever you saw me and Kunikida stood together you'd turn to Sasaki and mutter, "Oh geez," to her with a roll of your eyes or a short glance over at me. She'd smile back and that would be that, the funny little secret, the inside joke the two of you shared that left me feeling ridiculed, frustrated, upset.

Why had things turned out like this?

I wanted to ask you outright but I never had the heart.

As the months passed and the seasons changed I faced constant reminders that I was losing you and our friendship in this downward spiral of kissing a boy I didn't love, watching you grow closer to Sasaki as you began attending cram school together. Seeing her gradually taking my place in your heart made me realise that if I lost you for good, I had no idea what I'd do.

So after two more weeks of pretending to love and pretending that everything was fine, I admitted they weren't, and I did the right thing.

The two of us broke up.

When I told him what we had wasn't enough, I'd expected him to tear up a little, or yell at me for stringing him along. When he simply nodded and accepted it, I felt like his over all reaction was a punishment for me in itself. But how could I have expected anything different? Before we'd dated, we were friends. In that moment he accepted that I wanted to run, and that was enough.

When I'd told him how sorry I was, he shrugged and explained that he already sort of knew that things between us had gradually become stale. We parted on friendly terms and continued to stand side by side, but as a union of friendship, not first-love jitters.

I remember your face when I came up to you during cleaning duties and told you we'd broken up. You tried so hard to cover up your relief, but did you think I was blind?

You told me you'd stayed away because you felt like a third wheel in our friendship, but a stable friendship needs even numbers to run. What made you think for a second that things would've been ruined if you and Sasaki had carried on like normal, treated us as though nothing were wrong?

I wanted to call you an asshat, a word I'd picked up from a drunk guy rambling outside my bedroom window a few weeks prior to the break-up, but I lost the battle to my conscience and kept my mouth shut.

Even if our friendship was somewhat the same as it was before me and Kunikida began to date, that didn't seem to stop you from hanging out with Sasaki more, much to my irritation. I felt like such a jealous fool, wanting to come between the two of you like that, but what was I supposed to think? Was there even any chance I could walk back into your life now?

A few months passed when Kunikida suddenly announced that contrary to his previous plans, he'd decided to apply to North High instead, saying there was some sort of connection he felt he urgently needed to pursue.

To say the least I was surprised, since Kunikida hadn't exactly been smitten since our break-up… but after what I did to him, how could I let him down?

So I did the next best thing I could - I told him I'd apply to North High as well.

When he asked why, I shrugged and told him the truth; that he was my friend and I'd follow him wherever he went. His face went red and he stammered out a thanks, and I was happy for him.

I'd broken his heart, but he'd bounced right back, and I couldn't take that away from him.

Later when I asked him who the lucky lady was, he blushed and told me it was a secret. It was a relief to see him smiling and frowning and blushing again. It felt like our friendship had finally healed over completely.

I found out shortly after that you were planning to apply for North High too, simply because you had no idea where else you could go. For a while my heart soared and I wanted to reach out and hug the both of you, because we'd be together again as we began a new chapter in our lives.

Then Sasaki announced she was going to a high school in the next neighbourhood over, and our group grew eerily silent.

I'd envied and loathed her so much since the day we'd met, furious that she always seemed to ridicule me and treat me like I was stupid and leave me out of jokes and take you away to have you all to herself. To me she'd always been a rival of sorts, the friend I had that I didn't like at all. If anything, I thought I'd be overjoyed that I'd never have to see her prim little face scrutinizing me ever again.

So why was it that when I knew she'd be leaving us behind, it made me so sad?

You were handling it worse than me. You spent your days in an anxious silence, holding onto your arms and trying to fold yourself up like an origami swan.

September was spent in style, days sat around the pool, which was packed so tightly with the kids from our class it looked like a lobster trap had been filled to the brim with dozens of fleshy hormonal shrimp.

I saw you watching Okamoto from far away, and it made my teeth grind. Sure, she was strikingly pretty and had a bigger bust than me, but you honestly hadn't noticed me at all? That stung.

You were captured by her as she swam, her hair swaying easily in the water. I noticed you weren't watching Sasaki, though, which made me feel a little more relieved.

Later that day, as she began chastising you over application forms, I noticed your gaze following her chest once more and found myself kicking you in the shin under the table. When you glared over at me I couldn't help but feel a little satisfied that your attention had been driven away from Okamoto's boobs.

Of course, then that raised another question in my mind. For as long as we'd been in middle school you'd seemed captured by Sasaki, but as soon as Okamoto and her annoyingly perfect body entered the picture you began giving Sasaki about as much attention as you did me.

Did that make Okamoto the love rival after all?

…No, I didn't think so. More like anything with a pretty face and nice curves to match enticed you, as it did to any other healthy young boy our age. That was the moment I realised maybe the problem wasn't Sasaki, but you, instead.

If I took Sasaki out of the equation, you'd only find another pretty girl to replace her, am I right?

Of course, this was a stupid deduction to make, since we were all pretty jacked up on raging hormones and the like. At the time it made so much sense, though.

And then our exam period came around.

We sat our exams and I saw you clutching your pencil so tightly it almost snapped. You and Sasaki were attending the same cram school, but the two of you were planning on attending totally different high schools. I could tell you were hurting, but nothing I said made you feel any better, did it?

Sasaki was the one you wanted at a time like this, so much so that you began to avoid her. Where was the logic in that?

And then I remembered in elementary school, when you did the exact same thing to me.

This time, though, I wasn't letting you deflate without first putting up a pretty darn good fight.

The end of the year seemed to sneak up on us way too fast and I had trouble keeping up completely, fearing the days we had would never come back. Our last cultural festival had been a rubbish turnout, leaving us feeling more down in the dumps than ever. But in the end it was okay, because Kunikida pulled me to one side and made a proposal.

Not that kind of proposal. That'd make you act all weird again.

The week before the end of the school year we met up in Kunikida's back garden, just a few blocks away from the train station, and all lit sparklers. You and Sasaki had no idea what was going on, just that we were here and we were having fun. When I brought out the cake, with iced words reading We'll miss you, Sasaki, I saw her guarded expression break for the first time.

"Huh?" Her mouth flapped dumbly as she tried to find the right words. You said nothing, but your eyes widened to the size of saucers.

Four candles were jammed in at awkward angles, one for each of us.

"When we each blow them out, we each get a wish," I explained. "If we all have hope in these candles… our wishes are more likely to come true, right?"

"Wishes aren't things we can simply hope will happen," Sasaki interrupted matter-of-factly, although her voice was a little wobbly. "If one hopes for their wishes to be granted, one must go out of their way and remove all of the obstacles first. So they don't work as simply as you think."

"Shut up and make your wish," I said, easily maddened by her comment. Kunikida glanced between the two of us awkwardly, wanting to intervene without thinking he was being pushy. Your sparkler was facing away, so I couldn't see your expression.

Reluctantly she closed her eyes and blew out her candle, bangs ruffling slightly. When she straightened out, Sasaki absentmindedly dunked her sparkler into the bucket of rain water beside her, listening intently as it hissed loudly.

Kunikida went next and his cheeks flushed after his candle's flame was extinguished, giving me the impression that he was thinking about the girl from North High again. Figured.

What was it that you wished for as you quickly huffed and puffed yours out? I wished for a safe journey into our high school lives, full of new faces and old faces, making the type of high school memories I knew would last for the rest of my life.

We stood around in Kunikida's tiny garden, talking about anything and everything until the sky was pitch black and we were shivering violently in our winter coats.

When I glanced over to Sasaki her gaze was glazed over as she watched flames dancing in front of her. At some point we'd started a bonfire, throwing dead leaves and pieces of tree bark into the fire once we'd got it going. Her cheeks were flushed with cold.

"Thank you… all of you…"

She hugged her knees and I watched on silently; I'd never seen Sasaki so… out of character before. A strange way to determine her personality, that's for sure, but it was exactly as I'd described it - the normally calm and smug air had long since gone, replaced by a frightened, insecure child no different from the rest of us.

I pushed my hat further back on my head and lay on the cold, damp grass, inhaling the smell of winter and wood smoke mingling with my inner warmth that radiated from me like an open fire.

"No problem," I murmured into the night sky, stretching out like a cat. She laughed, voice sounding rattled.

"Friendship is a good thing to have, isn't it?"

And so, our rivalry was over. Come graduation we parted on friendly terms, the frustration gone, the jealousy abandoned.

We all lost touch though, didn't we?

The three of us were placed into the same class, while Sasaki walked in a different direction, alone. I think we were all scared for her, lonely without her, oddly subdued.

Uniforms were selected. New equipment was bought. Expectations were raised. Family matters grew worse.

When I next opened my eyes, the cherry blossoms were only just beginning to bloom, scarcely ten blossoms on the tree of all trees.

Oh, well.

…I guess it's time for high school.

A/N: Next stop, high school! I have to say I'm pretty nervous about it. There's so much to cover! So many plot twists, so much drama! I don't know how I'm going to get it all down on paper! (Or in my case, on keyboard.)

What are you thinking of these two cuties so far? Enough sexual tension for you guys? Not enough sexual tension for you guys? Let me know what you think! (Also, thank you to everybody who reviewed! It made me really happy!)

For some reason I find myself shipping Kunikida/Sasaki even though they had no romantic interactions in the whole of this chapter (and that I've implied future Kunikida/Tsuruya action). She's obviously going to turn up later, since bidding her farewell after only one chapter seems too sad, and I'd miss writing her character too much (even though I get nervous every time I do and I have to have somebody proofread it for reassurance that she's IC enough).

Anyway, I'll see you guys later! Look out for our high school arc! Thank you to Super for your proofreading! You've been awesome to me! Here's to Ryoko and Kyon! *raises glass*